


It Started With a Whisper

by MukeSinner



Series: It started with a whisper [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse, Anxiety, Bad Boy Harry, Blowjobs, Bottomlouis, BoyxBoy, BrokenHome, Depression, Drug Abuse, Fanfiction, Harry Styles - Freeform, Innocent Louis, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, M/M, Minor Violence, School Nerd, Swearing, Topharry, analsex, handjobs, larrystylinson, suicidal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-07-16 08:57:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 151,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7261114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MukeSinner/pseuds/MukeSinner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis Tomlinson was comfortable in his shell, not at all wanting to go out in the world and do things that would involve him being social... Until Harry Styles swooped in and changed that all. Harry is well known for the reputation he quickly picked up by beating up the jock at his school. People knew not to mess with him, seeing as he was now considered the schools bad ass. But what happens when Louis Tomlinson discovers that Harry isn't as bad as he wants to appear? Behind those dark eyes and clenched fists, is a boy who is looking for someone to make him feel love again.<br/>This isnt your typical bad boy/ nerd story. In this, the badboy isn't a douche to the nerd, and the nerd isn't completely defenseless or naive to Harry's intentions. This is a story where two totally different puzzle pieces were shoved together, creating a beautiful, yet imperfect picture on top.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! So, I know I already have two stories that I am working on, but I decided I wanted to write one on my own. Just to hurry and clarify something. When you see these //, that means that the words were supposed the be in italics, but they don't work on here so I just decided to use those. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this story!! :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Louis Tomlinson was comfortable in his shell, not at all wanting to go out in the world and do things that would involve him being social... Until Harry Styles swooped in and changed that all. Harry is well known for the reputation he quickly picked up by beating up the jock at his school. People knew not to mess with him, seeing as he was now considered the schools bad ass. But what happens when Louis Tomlinson discovers that Harry isn't as bad as he wants to appear? Behind those dark eyes and clenched fists, is a boy who is looking for someone to make him feel love again.  
> This isnt your typical bad boy/ nerd story. In this, the badboy isn't a douche to the nerd, and the nerd isn't completely defenseless or naive to Harry's intentions. This is a story where two totally different puzzle pieces were shoved together, creating a beautiful, yet imperfect picture on top. 
> 
> Or
> 
> The bad boy is helping the nerd become social and be comfortable with himself, while the nerd is helping the bad boy realize his life is worth so much more than even he realizes. Will these two be able to help each other, or will their imperfect puzzle break apart because the pieces just weren't compatible, no matter how much they changed to fit the other?

_Drowning._

_I felt like I was drowning, like water was clouding my lungs as my head just shied below the surface of the water. It was like it was taunting me. I could see where my freedom was, where I could finally give my lungs the air they needed, but no matter how fast I swam or how hard I pushed, the surface always seemed just out of reach._

_I could feel each forceful breath that made it past my chapped lips, and I could feel as it went down my scratchy throat and filled my burning lungs, but it still wasn’t enough. I needed more. I needed a lot more, but I could never breath enough in._

Slipping my bottom lip between my teeth, I shook my head clear of my depressing thoughts and focused on the paper in front of me. It was completely filled in, other than the right corner of the paper where my name was supposed to be. I had finished it only minutes after the math teacher had handed out the paper, and I was the last person to receive it, but everyone else seemed to be struggling with the work.

I gnawed on my bottom lip as I slide further down in my desk, my right arm lying palm down across the arm of the desk, the chilled tile cooling down my over heated body. My feet stretched out in front of me, crossing over one another as they plopped down in the basket below the desk in front of me, which was empty, an obvious plus to being the weird kid of the school.

I stared blankly at my desk as I thought back to last night, small pieces floating to my mind though they were all broken and didn’t really help me remember exactly what had happened last night. All I really remember is picking up the bottle of alcohol my sister had purchased for us. After that, it’s all black.

I sigh deeply and shove the arm of my hoodie up further, it bunching up at the crook of my elbow. My fingers skimmed over the top of my desk, my focus on the picture someone had drew. I was so transfixed on tracing the grey lining, that I hadn’t realized the teacher calling my name.

It wasn’t until the person next to me slapped their hand down on the top of my desk that I jumped and looked up, my heart lurching into my throat when I realized everyone’s eyes were on me. I gulped loudly, my ringing ears focusing on what the teacher was saying as I focused my wide eyes on my lap, my fingers plucking at the loose strings.

“What?” I asked softly, glancing up at the teacher for a second before I looked down at the paper, my heart rate picking up speed when I seen everyone was still staring at me expectantly, a few of the popular kids laughing and snickering. I cleared my throat and shifted in the seat, my palms beginning to feel clammy as my nerves grew.

“I said,” He began, dragging out the ‘i’ in said, “Since you seem to be focusing on anything other than your assignment, I was wondering if you would care to come up to the board and do number 13 for us.” Before he had even finished speaking I felt my body go tense in my hard chair. I slowly looked up at him, my teeth clasping harder around my lip when I seen his, as well as some other students, obvious smirk.

_Fucking prick knows exactly what he’s doing._

I shake my head softly and turn my gaze back down to my paper, my hands subconsciously pulling down the arms to my hoodie to get some kind of coverage from everyone’s burning gaze. When my arms were covered, I felt some of the uncomfortableness leave my body, but I was still a statue in my seat.

“I don’t want to.” I said quietly, my voice sounding weak and fragile. I didn’t dare glance up, knowing if I seen the faces that belonged to all the people I could hear laughing, the tears that were burning my eyes would begin to fall.

“I’m sorry, did I give you a choice?” The smugness was clear in his voice. He was obviously so proud with himself that he could make a student so uncomfortable, so embarrassed.

Closing my eyes for a brief second, I inhaled deeply and opened them slowly, looking up at him. His arms were crossed over his chest, his body leaning back slightly from the way he was standing on the ball of his feet. He must of caught my gaze because his eyebrow quirks up, the corner of his lip tugging slightly when he seen me gulp before I picked up my piece of paper.

I had full intentions on standing up to walk to the board, but once I remembered I would be in front of _everyone_ in this room, I quickly leaned down in my seat, my paper falling from my grasp and fluttering in air for a second before it landed on the top of my desk, the top left corner of the paper hanging off the edge.

“We don’t have all day.” His voice was louder this time, making me jump in my seat. I hated when people rose their voice at me, especially when there was a room full of people.

My foot began to bounce. I can't do this. I can't go up and humiliate myself in front of the whole class. I mean, I know how to do the work, but what if the chalk squeaks too loudly, or my hand shakes too much and one of my numbers get messed up. I just, I can't do this.

Sighing in defeat, I slumped back in my chair even further, avoiding everyone's gaze and ignoring the thumping in my ears from how fast my heart was beating. I knew I would get pulled to the side after class because of the way I'm acting, that is, if I don't make it out of here before he can say anything.

I heard him clap his hands together loudly before he began to walk across the room and towards me. I held my breath, anticipating the moment he yelled at me, but right as his feet came into my view, the bell rang. The other students in my class shuffled around, all of them gathering up their work and belongings before they exited to room to head to lunch.

A large, calloused covered hand laid flat on my desk, a metal band circling his ring finger and shimmering in the light. “You have to get out of your comfort zone if you're ever going to become successful.” He said quietly, just loud enough for only me to hear.

_Fuck you. I don't have to do anything I don't want to._

I forced a smile and looked up at him, my blue eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I know, I'm sorry.” I had no idea why I was apologizing. It was him who caused my public humiliation, all because I had finished my assignment earlier than everyone else.

I heard him sigh quietly as he squatted down, his knees spreading as he slowly went down. “You're a brilliant student, and I don't see why you can't push through the…” He paused as he scratched the back in his neck with his right hand, his eyebrows furrowing. “ _Problem_ you have.”

I inhaled deeply at his choice of words, my nostrils being attacked by his strong, almost overwhelming, cologne. “I don't have a problem.” I almost growled, ripping the paper out of his hand that he had picked up. I shoved it into my backpack that was leaning against my desk, the black backpack open and allowing me to quickly shove everything in there before I fumbled with the zipper, my shaking hands having trouble zipping it up.

“I'll see you tomorrow.” He said, standing up and stepping aside to allow me to get past him. I almost ran towards the door, my body easily maneuvering through the desks. I needed to get out of here, I needed to get as far away from this class as I possibly could.

I kept my head bowed as I walked down the crowded hallways, having to step over some students feet that were eating in the hallway, their backs flat against the wall and their feet extended in front of them. I avoided their faces, knowing if we made eye contact they would laugh at me.

When I reached an empty hallway, I sighed loudly and stopped walking, pressing my butt against the wall as I bent over and put my hands on my knees, my backpack slipping off my shoulder a little. “Breath.” I whispered, echoing the words my grandma spoke to me every time I got over worked.

At even the slightest memory of my grandma, I feel my heartbeat slow down and my body relax, a soft smile tugging at my lips. Her face pops into my head, and I can perfectly picture each and every wrinkle that covers her face. I imagine her eyes crinkling at the corners, just like mine does, as she smiles brightly over at, her perfectly white teeth showing as her lips stretched over them.

I breath deeply in relief and stand up straight once again, my eyes roaming over the hallway quickly to make sure I was alone before I began making my way towards the one and only class in this school that can provide me some sort of comfort, if that's even what you can call it.

I hefted my backpack further up onto my shoulder, the weight of the bag pulling harshly at my shoulder and digging into it, creating a red indent, even through the thick material of my hoodie. I ignore it as I push myself to walk down the hallway, my hand curling tightly around the strap of my bag when I walked into Mrs. Black’s room and seen she wasn't alone.

Stood next to the older woman was the principle, as well as an older man with a brown hair. When they sensed my presence, the principle took a step back as well as the other man, allowing me to see a boy sitting in the chair right next to Mrs. Black's desk, his back facing me.

He had brown hair that was longer than most males hair, it reaching the tops of his shoulders. He had on a black shirt and black skinny jeans, and pair of black and white Dcs covering his feet. I hadn't realized I was staring at him until I heard the principle clear his throat, causing my gaze to float over to them.

“Mr. Styles, this is the student we were just talking about.” Mr. Daniel said, his arms folding over his chest as he spoke. My eyes flicked over to Mrs. Black’s, back to the principles, then over to the other man, hoping to get some sort of answer.

“Ah, so this is the infamous student. Hello, my names Desmond.” The man I didn't recognize said, his lips curling back a little and revealing his teeth. They were perfectly straight and white, but the way he looked at me made me feel uncomfortable. I pushed back the uneasy feeling in my stomach and walked forward a few steps, slipping my small hand into his and shaking it softly before I let it drop down to my side.

“Hello, my names Louis.” My manners instantly kicked in. I forced yet another smile today, my eyes locking with his brown ones. His smile was warm and his eyes twinkled as he stared at me for another second before he remembered why he was in here in the first place.

He cleared his throat and stepped to the side a little, allowing me a better chance to see the boy who has yet to speak. “Louis, this is Harry, Harry, this is Louis, the student who will be tutoring you.” My wide eyes left Harry for a second as I looked over at Jen, or Mrs. Black, depending on what teacher is in the room.

I shook my head a little when I knew Desmond wasn't looking, my eyes going round and pleading. The second I seen Desmond look over, I quickly stopped shaking my head and smiled at him, my heart skipping a beat when Harry stood up and turned to face my, my eyes instantly locking with his green eyes.

To say I was shocked when I finally got to see him was an understatement. If I was being honest, he was not at all what I was expecting.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the kudos! I was surprised I got so many in just one night, but just know they mean the world to me. So, thank you all! :)

I carefully slid my sweaty hand into Harry’s, my fingers curling around his before his did the same, making my much smaller hand disappear. He moved his hand up and down, making my arm move as well, before he let go and let both of our arms fall down to our sides. Our handshake had lasted for less than a few seconds, but as it was happening, it felt like a lot longer.

It wasn’t until my head began to swim that I realized that I had forgot how to breath. I gasped loudly and tore my gaze away from his piercing green eyes, focusing on Mrs. Black and ignoring that small smirk I had seen dancing on his lips as he leaned against the desk with his right hip, his arms crossing over his chest.

“I’ll be tutoring him?” I asked, intending my voice to come out strong, though it wavered slightly. I sucked on my cheek and wiped both of my palms against my thighs, my levis collecting the majority of the sweat.

I had been surprised that I had even remembered how to use my voice, let alone make a coherent sentence. The moment my eyes had locked with his, my mind had became hazy and my stomach erupted with butterflies, but as the seconds ticked by, they turned into large bats flapping away in my stomach.

I shook my head and pulled the backpack further up on my shoulder, my fingers curling tightly around it and causing my knuckles to turn white. I shifted my weight from one foot to another, feeling rather uncomfortable with all their gazes pinned on me, waiting for me to catch up to them and quit acting like a fucking moron.

Nodding slowly, Mrs. Black turned in her seat and leaned forward, folding her arms over her desk as her eyes flickered from me, to Harry, then back to me. “For the rest of the school year.” She clarified, her red fingernails tapping on the desk, making me even more uncomfortable.

I swallowed thickly and bowed my head, walking towards one of the tables in the room. Droplets of sweat began to collect on my forehead, one rolling down and between my eyebrows but before it could go any further I quickly wiped it off with the back of my sleeve. “What are his strong subjects?” Even trying my voice was weak. I barely even heard it above the thumping in my ears, so I doubt they would be able to hear it unless they really strained their ears.

I carefully sat down in my seat and reluctantly laid the backpack on the table, my eyes moving up to the clock on the wall. I sighed in relief when I seen we only had twenty minutes of lunch left, meaning I would only have to sit in here for another five minutes before I can head to my next class and just sit in there. The teacher, Mrs. Anderson, has always been fond of me so she has let me sit in her class for lunch many times.

Okay, I know how bad that sounds but I am not a loner. Well, I kinda am. I only have like, three people in this school that will actually talk to me. Other than that, I don’t really talk to the students unless the teacher forces me to by making me do a stupid group project. Even then I don’t really talk to anyone. When we all form in our little group, they all agree that I should do all the work because then they are guaranteed an A, and I honestly don’t mind it. I’m used to people using me and walking all over me. People usually don’t stay around me if I have no use to them, including my own family.

Remembering what was going on around me, I gripped the hem of my sweatshirt and looked back at the people who were now in their own conversation, none of them hearing what I had asked. I didn’t bother listening to them, instead, I let my gaze wander to Harry. He was now sitting on the edge of the desk, his feet planted firmly on the ground as he interacted in the conversation with the three adults.

My eyes roamed over the side of his face, a strange tingling running through my fingers as the urge to run them over his smooth looking cheek grew stronger. His thin, pink lips were down turned in a frown and his nose was straight, but slightly curved at the tip. He had an amazing jawline and for a male, his eyebrows were surprisingly well taken care of.

I let my eyes move down his body, my tongue slipping between my teeth as I took in his tall, lean figure. His waist was slim, but even through his shirt you could see the starting of a six pack. The black material of his shirt clung to his biceps, showing off his muscles and making me bit down harder on my tongue. He had long legs that looked thin, but muscly at the same time, and he had large feet.

My little moment of appreciating his body was brought to a sudden halt when I distantly heard someone calling my name. I quickly slipped my tongue back into my mouth and internally wiped off the saliva that I imagined was trickling down my chin. Slowly, I looked over at Mr. Daniel, seeing his arms were crossed tightly over his chest and his right eyebrow was inclined as he stared expectantly at me.

“Yes, sir?” I asked quietly, burying my face in my shoulder when my face began to heat. My grip on my hoodie tightened a little when my chest began to grow tighter, my anxiety starting to grow with each second that ticked by in silence.

“You’ll start tutoring Harry starting seventh period. Now, if you all will excuse me, I have a meeting to attend.” Nodding his head in Mr. Styles’ direction, he spun around on his heels and briskly walked out of the room. An awkward silence filled the room, the only noise being the slow tick of the clock as it counted down the seconds that passed.

I turned back in my seat and unzipped my backpack, pulling out the yellow folder I put all my english work in. I pushed my black bag over a little and put the folder on the table, flipping it open so I could see the papers in it. I pursed my lips to the side and skimmed through the papers, finally pulling out a four page essay that I had finished a few weeks ago, on the same day it had been assigned to me.

I pulled a black pen out of my backpack and wrote my name in neat cursive in the top right corner, a smile tugging at my lips as I read over the paper. I have really outdone myself with this essay on racial equality. I not only did what the teacher required, but I also went the little extra mile and did two pages more than I was supposed to and used direct quotes and things from people who fought for racial equality.

“Did the students from yesterday finish the essays?” I asked Jen, forgetting for a brief moment that there was other people in the room. Realization soon dawned on me, making my eyes widen and my breath hitch in my throat. I quickly glanced over in their direction, exhaling deeply when I seen nobody was in the room.

“Fuck.” I mumbled quietly under my breath, realizing that I wouldn’t get a response. Shrugging my shoulders, I put the cap back on my pen and put it back in my bag, as well as my folder but I kept the essay out. Groaning, I stood up and slung my backpack back over my shoulder, then picked up the paper and held it tightly in my fist as I walked out of Jen’s room and down the hallway, in the same direction that I had came in.

Idly, I wonder why Harry came to this school so late in the school year. We are already almost done with our second term, meaning that after Christmas break the new term will start and we will all have different classes. Different thoughts run through my head; maybe his dad got a new job and got transferred down here, or maybe he got kicked out of his last school.

Shaking the ridiculous thought out of my head, I quickly popped into the counselor's office and said hello to them before I began to walk towards my english class once again. The hallways I were in were empty, them being closed off during lunch. But the moment I walked past the red doors that were currently closed, I would be swallowed by the sea of students rushing to their next class.

Taking a deep breath, and praying to god that I don’t get trampled, I opened the door and walked through it. Instantly the loud chatter of all the students surrounded me, and before I knew it, I was shoved into the middle of the hallway. I felt my breathing stop and my body go rigid as I followed everyone in the direction opposite of the lunchroom. A few times I felt someone elbow me harshly in my side or someone flat tire my shoe, but I kept pushing through, desperate to find an escape.

Finally, I broke past the barricade of students and fell head first into the hallway. I landed on my hands and knees, making my palms sting painfully and my knees throb. My backpack fell off my shoulder and I watched through blurry eyes as it got kicked across the hallway, the paper underneath my hand soon getting stepped on as well.

I heard a few people laugh, but nobody bothered to help me up. Closing my eyes for a brief second, I slowly stood up, picking up my paper and putting it under my armpit before I began to wipe the dirt off of my palms that had been tracked in here by hundreds of different shoes. I ignored the pain in my knees and hands and searched the hallway for my backpack, my eyes widening when I seen Seth had it. The thin black strap was pinched tightly between his dirty, uneven fingernails, his light fingernail standing out against the dark color.

“Missing something?” He asked, his eyes shining with humor as a smirk tugged at his lips. I swallowed thickly and took a step back when I realized how close he really was to me. I didn’t do well with things like this, and he knew it, that’s why he constantly picked on me and made my life a living hell.

“What? Chatter mouth finally decide to turn mute?” He asked, earning him a few laughs from the boys that surrounded him. I glanced at each of their faces, my stomach churning uncomfortably when I seen they were all staring at me with their dark, beady looking eyes.

“Can I have my backpack, please?” Knowing if I used words like please and thank you, he would go a little easier on me. I looked around the hallway and seen all the students weren’t paying any attention to what was going on. They were so engrossed in what was going on with them, that they didn't even notice one of their classmates getting bullied.

Oh, who am I kidding? They don’t give a fuck. A student could get their head bashed into the lockers and they wouldn’t care as long as it wasn’t their locker. I’ve experienced this first hand. Last year, when Seth and his posse decided to slam my locker shut on my hand, none of the students even tried to help me open it which resulted in some nasty ass bruises and a broken pointer finger.

He was the typical school bully, and I was the typical loner boy who didn’t talk to anyone and sat alone most of the time. He made sure to tell me that almost daily too, but luckily for me, he had gotten that little daily reminder out of the way this morning in first period. Which we share, unfortunately.

Returning back to reality, I watch in horror as Seth takes a step closer to me but just as he did, a large body stepped in front of him, their back facing me. “Hello Seth, has that F come up yet?” Mrs. Black asked, her hand on her hip as she stared at Seth with what I imagined to be her strict face.

Laughing internally, I watched Seth cower back before handing the backpack to Jen, which I grabbed and held it tightly in my arms. A few quiet words were mumbled between them before Seth turned around and walked down the hallway, his pointy witch looking nose sticking straight in the air.

“What is that boys problem?” Jen asked as she turned to look down at me, her head shaking softly as she sighed. “Let’s get you to class.”  
Before she had even finished speaking she began to walk away, forcing me to speed walk to even catch up to her. The people in the hallway moved over a little and allowed us to walk through, all of them knowing not to mess with Jen.

Soon, after a long minute of comfortable silence, we stopped in front of Mrs. Anderson’s room. With a pat on the shoulder and a goodbye, Jen pushed me into the room and began to make her way back to her classroom. I stumbled through the door, but quickly caught myself and smiled softly when I seen nobody was in the room except for Mrs. Anderson.

“I have my essay finished.” I said proudly as I walked towards her, extending my arm that had my essay in it. She looked at me from above her glasses, her eyes crinkling in the corners as she smiled at me.

“With you, I know it will not disappoint.” Blushing furiously, I bowed my head and walked to my seat at the back of the room, but stopped dead in my tracks when I looked up. Placed around the room were large white tables, there being six in all.

_How the hell did I not notice these before?_

“Sit wherever, dear.” I heard Mrs. Anderson say behind me, her clearly catching onto my hesitance. I nodded and scurried to the table in the far back corner, taking a seat that had my back facing the wall.

I sat down in the cool plastic seat and got situated before I hung my backpack on the back of my chair. When all of the was taken care of, I turned back around and scanned over my essay once again, checking for any mistakes or anything. I was so lost in reading my work, that I didn’t hear the bell ring nor did I hear all the students shuffle into the room.

What finally caught my attention, however, was when Mrs. Anderson’s scratchy voice filled the room, her voice echoing because of the built in speakers. I, of course, didn’t hear a word she said but when I glanced up, I felt my heart drop into the pit of my stomach. Standing next to Mrs. Anderson was Harry, who was towering over the tiny teacher.

I gulped loudly and tried to listen to what she was saying but my ears were filled with this buzzing sound. I closed my eyes, and prayed that when I opened them he would be gone, but like every other time, my prayers were not answered.

I’ve come to the conclusion that god hates me.

Taking deep, even breaths, I looked around the room in hopes I would find something to catch my attention and luckily for me, I did. Before, I hadn’t noticed where everyone was sitting because my eyes were too focused on Harry, but now I noticed I was the only one sitting at my table.

_Shocker._

I sucked my bottom lip between my teeth and laced my fingers together, keeping my gaze on the white table when I noticed Harry walk from the front of the room. I held my breath, waiting for him to take his seat at one of the other tables before I even thought about breathing. I heard a few of the students offer Harry a seat at their table, but before I even knew what was happening, I felt the chair beside me being pulled out.

_Oh fuck. God really does hate me._

My nostrils were soon filled with the intoxicating scent of mint and some really good smelling cologne. I found myself subconsciously leaning to the side a little, trying to inhale as much of that scent as I possibly could. Oh god, it smelt like heaven. If I were to die right here and right now, which I probably will from heart failure, then I would be one happy ass angel. Or devil, depending on if the big man in the sky really does hate me.

“Don’t worry, you’ll be smelling that a lot from now on, partner.” Harry whispered in my ear, his warm, minty fresh breath ghosting over the side of my face and making goosebumps rise on my skin. I squeaked quietly and looked over at him, my mouth falling open slightly when he grinned widely at me and winked, his green eyes twinkling with mischievousness.

_Holy fuck. This boy is going to make the rest of my school year one hell of a roller coaster ride._


	3. Chapter 3

_Breath._

_Shit, don’t breath. His smell is everywhere._

Gasping a deep breath in through my mouth, I closed my mouth and turned my attention to the front of the room. I tried to ignore the boy beside me that was now leaning back in his chair, his feet being propped up on the table and his head resting against the back of the chair. But even with my best attempt, I found myself glancing at him out of the corner of my eye.

My body went statue still when I seen his head lull to the side, his green eyes studying me and making me feel like my skin was on fire. I quickly looked back at the front of the room and acted as if I was listening to Jannett Larson reading her essay. Out of insecurity, I tugged the sleeves to my hoodie down further and turned in my seat a little, making it so my back was now facing Harry.

Smiling in triumph when I heard him mumble something, I turned my head to the side and actually started to listen to Jannett, who was just finishing her essay. I caught a few of her nasally words, but if I was being completely honest, I didn’t find her essay enjoyable at all. It sounded as if she got a bunch of different sentences off of google and put them into one paper.

Shaking my head, I turned my direction down to my paper, only to see there was a little note on top of it. My eyebrows furrowing, I glanced over at Harry who was staring at the front of the class, his arms folded behind his head to keep it up. Pursing my lips to the side, I carefully unfolded the note and read the sloppy handwriting.

**_Are you a virgin?_ **

Nearly choking on my own saliva, I crumpled the piece of paper up and shoved it into my pocket. My cheeks were flaming bright red and my blue eyes were widened. I had hoped that Harry didn’t catch onto it but like every other day, I was unlucky.

“I can’t wait to see your ass that color.” Harry whispered as he moved in his seat, making it so his arms were folded on top of the table so he could rest his chin on them.

I bit down on my bottom lip harshly and finally looked over at him, my blue eyes flaring for a moment when I seen how cocky he looked. “Leave me alone, Harry, or I’ll tell Mrs. Black.” I warned him quietly, my eyes flickering from him, to Mrs. Anderson, then back to him.

Harry gasped quietly and covered his mouth with his hand, his green eyes widening as he feigned surprise. “Oh no, Louis, please don't tell the teacher that I asked about your sacred virtue.” Snorting loudly, Harry leaned back in his his chair and raised his eyebrows, his intense green gaze still being pinned on me.

My lips parted slightly as I stared at him, not because I was shocked by what he was saying, but because he was actually holding a conversation with me-- the weird kid. It was strange to me that he was actually willing to talk, and sit by me.

A voice in the back of my head was nagging at me, telling me that he was just doing it because one of the popular kids had talked him into befriending me, before they all humiliated me in front of the school. Inhaling deeply, I looked down at my paper and began to play with the right corner, the one without the staple in it.

I didn’t bother responding to him, nor did I give him the satisfaction of knowing his words affected me in more ways than one. For the next few minutes, I sat in my seat and fidgeted, the corner of my paper becoming crumpled from me pinching it between my fingers. It wasn’t until I heard my name being called that I looked up and seen Mrs. Anderson was standing in front of the class, a white piece of paper in her hand which is what she used to read students names off of the paper.

My heart stuttered in my chest before it dropped into the pit of my stomach. She wanted me to go up there, in front of all these people, and read my essay out loud. My hands began to shake uncontrollably as I stood up from my seat and picked up my paper. Tears began to burn my eyes as I walked past Harry and up to the front of the classroom, my body burning with embarrassment and fear.

Taking a deep, much needed breath, I turned around and slowly lifted my gaze up to the room full of people, all of their eyes pinned on me as they waited for me to start talking. My blurry gaze went over all the peoples faces in the class, seeing most of them was neutral and bored while some of them showed amusement.

I swallowed thickly and took another deep breath, my eyes finally landing on the person sitting in the back of the classroom. His long hair was cascading around his face and framing it as he leaned forward, his elbows on his knees and his chin resting in his palms, his green, cold eyes instantly locking with mine.

I felt my body calm down some as I continued staring at him. My hands were no longer shaking and my heart was no longer thumping against my chest. With a slight inclination of his head and a small smirk, I felt a sudden wave of courage crashing down over my body. Sighing quietly, I finally ripped my gaze away from his and glanced down at my paper.

It took me only three minutes to read through my paper and give my opinion on Racial Equality. When I had finally finished, I kept my gaze on my paper and smiled softly. I had done it. I had actually stood in front of a classroom, with thirty different eyes on me, and I hadn’t fainted or had a panic attack.

When I heard Mrs. Anderson dismiss me, I quickly walked to the back of the classroom and took my previous seat. I threw my essay down on the table and leaned back in my chair, my chest filling with this odd feeling I have only felt one other time in my life.

_Pride._

“Not too bad, bubble butt.” Harry said from beside me, a wide grin stretching his lips and allowing me to see his large dimples. I felt the blush return to my cheeks again. I am convinced that by the end of the day, my cheeks will be a permanent red color.

Rolling my eyes, which was odd behavior for me, I slumped back further in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest, ignoring Harry who was now scooting his seat closer to me, making it so my shoulder brushed his elbow. I gasped loudly, an electric current running through my arm and spreading through my body.

I glanced up at the curly haired boy by me to see if he had felt it too, and to my utter satisfaction, I seen his already pale face was even paler. He stared at me for a second with his now wide eyes before he stood up and scooted his seat back to where it was before, though this time he made it so his back was facing me.

Frowning a little, I tugged at my hoodie and pulled it down a little further, trying to hide my body as much as I could. I couldn’t figure out why Harry had acted that way. I mean, I know I am not the best looking thing in the world but if he hadn’t wanted our arms to touch he shouldn’t have moved his seat closer to mine.

_Was I really that gross?_

The rest of the period passed by quicker than I thought it would. The moment the bell rang, I jumped up from my seat and all but ran to Mrs. Anderson’s desk so I could turn in my essay. I handed the paper to her and just as I was about to turn around, I felt a small, frail hand grab my wrist.

“I am proud of you, Louis. I wasn’t going to call your name at first, but i’m glad I did. You did an amazing job and your essay was the best one I’ve heard today.” Mrs. Anderson said, a small smile stretching her leathery lips. I smiled softly at her and nodded my head a little before I turned around and walked out of the classroom.

I had made it a few steps down the overcrowded hallway before I felt something hitting against my arm. Jumping slightly, I stopped dead in my tracks and glanced over to see what had hit my arm. Standing next to me was Harry, a dark grin stretching his lips as he held out my backpack.

“Oh, thanks.” I said softly and grabbed the backpack out of his hand. I threw it over my shoulder and began to walk down the hallway again, not even waiting for him to respond. I weaved my way through all the students, trying to get to Mrs. Black’s room as quick as I possibly could.

As I walked, I couldn’t help but think back to how my body reacted when I had looked at Harry. It was strange that I had calmed down so quickly, and because of something as simple as looking into an almost complete strangers cold, green eyes. It was like a switch had been flipped inside of me. One minute I was a shaking mess, then the next minute I was completely calm and collected.

“Harry Styles.” I whispered quietly, the words flowing through the hallways before they died down and was replaced by someone yelling for their friends to stop. The moment his name had escaped past my lips, I felt an odd tingle running down my spine, but it was a good tingle. One I knew I wanted to feel again, kinda like the shock that had ran through my body when me and Harry had brushed arms.

Shaking my head, I walked through the door of Mrs. Black’s room and was greeted by someone laughing loudly. Cocking my head to the side, I walked further into the room and looked in the direction the noise was coming from. Sitting at the corner table was Jen and Harry. Jen was doubled over in her seat, her arms clutching her stomach as she laughed uncontrollably.

_How the hell did he get here before me, and what the hell was Jen laughing about?_

The moment they noticed my presence, Jen sat up in her seat and wiped the tears off her cheeks that had formed from how hard she was laughing. She kept one arm wrapped around her stomach as she stood up and walked over to me, her body occasionally shaking as her laughter died down.

“This boy fits in with us perfectly.” She said as she walked over to her desk and sat down in her rolling chair, her tennis shoe covered feet crossing over one another.

I nodded my head slowly, still lost, and took a seat at the table closer to the door. I set my backpack down in the seat next to me and out of curiosity, I glanced over at Harry. He was leaning over the table, his face being invisible from the way his hair was fanned out, as he worked on a stack of homework.

I smiled in approval and turned my attention over to Jen, who was now typing away furiously on her keyboard. “Do you have anything you need me to make copies of? Or any of your homework answer keys that you need help with?” I asked her as I stood up from my seat and walked over to the side of her desk.

“I only need you to help with some of the answer keys. They’re in the green folder.” She said, pointing her finger at the cubby thing that was next to her door. I nodded my head, though she couldn’t see, and walked over to the cubby’s, grabbing the green file.

I opened it and flipped through it as I walked back to my seat, reading over the numerous papers and seeing they were for science, english and math. I sat down on the edge of my chair and began to sort the stack of paper, soon making a stack for each class. When I was finished, I set the empty folder aside and began chewing on my bottom lip as I began to work on the stack of math homework.

I soon became engrossed in the task, finishing all ten papers in under twenty minutes, and I even showed my work. I was about to start on the second stack of paper, which was for english, when I felt someone’s gaze burning the side of my face. Slowly, I turned my head to the side and seen Harry was staring at me with his intense green eyes as he tapped his pencil on the desk.

“What?” I questioned quietly, my bottom lip slipping back between my teeth. Harry’s eyebrows furrowed for a second, his gaze flickering from me, to the three stacks of papers, then back to me.

“Are you some kind of genius?” For the first time since I met him, I just now realized how raspy his voice was. And boy was it raspy. Chuckling softly, I shook my head and looked down at the papers before I looked back up at him.

“No, I just know what to do because I’ve already done these.” I said, only speaking half of the truth. It was true, I had done this work before but even when I had done it I had finished it quickly. But I wouldn’t call myself a genius. I was smart, sure, but I was far from being a genius.

Looking not at all convinced, Harry leaned back in his chair and threw his pencil on the table. It clattered loudly and rolled for a second before it stopped just at the edge of the wooden table. “Bullshit. I’ve done this work at my old school before and I still don’t understand it.” Harry said, not at all fazed that he had just cursed in front of the teacher.

“Do you need help?” I asked, already standing up from my chair before he had even answered. I walked across the room and set down in the seat across from him. Leaning across the table, I grabbed the top piece of paper off of the stack and set back down in my seat, my feet not touching the ground due to how high these chairs were compared to the ones I was sitting in.

“Multiple step inequalities.” I read aloud, my face brightening up. I loved doing these ones. They were my absolute favorite, next to Exponential and Logarithmic Functions. God, I really am a nerd.

Brushing the thoughts aside, I began to explain to Harry how to do the work. He nodded his head along as I spoke, but he looked completely lost. “Understand?” I asked when I was finished explaining the first problem.

Harry sighed deeply and sat back in his chair, his knees spreading apart as he got into a more comfortable position. “I didn’t understand a single word you just said.” And despite how cocky he looked right now, I believed him. Not many people understood how to do most of the math they do in high school, and I guess I was just the odd ball out who not only understood how to do the math, but also enjoyed doing it.

Sighing deeply when I realized these next thirty minutes were going to be long, I grabbed Harry’s pencil and once again began to explain how to do the work to him, but this time I showed him how to do it by doing number five. Every few minutes I would glance up at him to see if he was paying attention, and each and every time I looked up, I found him already staring at me.

He didn't look away when he was caught either, and he didn't try to play it off like he was looking at the wall behind me or something. He would simply stay staring at me, a slight tint of curiosity in his eyes and a small smirk tugging at his lips.

To my surprise, the period had gone by faster than I was hoping. Well, at the beginning I was hoping the time would go as quick as possible, but as I continued to tutor Harry, I found myself hoping the time would slow down so I could get just a few more minutes with him. Harry, surprising both of us, ended up finishing his worksheet and the problems he didn't get my help on, he ended up getting right.

When the bell had rang, Harry grabbed his grey backpack off of the floor and put his stack of homework in it, refusing to leave it here because he insisted he would do it when he got home, and I honestly didn't want to argue with him. After we had both gathered our things and I put away the answer keys, we both went our separate ways the moment we walked out of the classroom.

I had walked left, towards the bus line, and he had walked right, towards the front doors. I didn't bother stopping by my locker on my way out of the school because I rarely used it after the incident that had happened last year.

So now, I found myself standing in the bus line, waiting for the teacher to tell us to start filling into the bus. My backpack was hanging on my shoulder, the weight of the books dragging it down and making it hit against my bum. I continued shifting my weight between my two feet, my nerves that had suddenly disappeared in sixth period just now returning.

As I was waiting at the back of the line, my bottom lip clasped between my teeth, I got the sudden feeling that someone was watching me. Keeping my head low, I glanced around the cafeteria, looking for anyone that may have been looking at me but it was so crowded I couldn't spot anyone past three feet in front of me.

A sudden tickling sensation on the back of my neck had me spinning around quicker than I have ever moved. The body that had been behind me was closer than I had anticipated, which made me smack right into their chest. I stumbled back a few inches, but a hand on my shoulder made it so I didn't fall over, like I thought I would.

Inhaling sharply, I glanced up at the person standing in front of me, my vision being filled with brown hair, plump lips and green eyes. “Harry.” I whispered softly, taking a step back to put some space between us because the proximity had my heart thudding away in my chest.

“Watch where you're going. I mean, you have some pretty decent air bags but a fall that hard would still hurt.” Even though I didn't really know what he was saying at the moment, I soon caught onto the fact that he was talking about my butt.

I blushed lightly and looked down at the white tiled floor, my hands going behind me to cover my butt the best that I could. “I thought you were going home.” I stated rather than asked, my soft voice just barely being heard above the chatter in the lunchroom.

I heard, rather than seen, Harry chuckle, his chuckle deep and throaty. “I am, but you're in my way.” My eyes widened and I quickly took a step to the side, allowing Harry to walk past me. I was too worried about the fact that I had been blocking Harry's path, that I hadn't realized all the different spaces he could have walked through.

“Sorry.” I mumbled, glancing up at him from underneath my long eyelashes. He shook his head and chuckled again, his dimples popping out and rendering me speechless for a minute.

“See ya later, Tomlinson,” and with that, he brushed past me and took long strides towards the open door that lead outside. His words continued to ring in my head, and the closer I payed attention to them, the more I realized it sounded like a promise, instead of just something someone would say to an acquaintance.

Smiling softly to myself, I watched as he walked out of the door, his body disappearing once the doors closed. I let my hands drop down to my sides and just as I took my spot at the end of the line, the teacher at the front of the line told us to start loading on the bus. I followed the line, the shit eating grin I had never slipping away, even when I got tripped and almost fell once I was on the bus.


	4. Chapter 4

The sound of the bus coming to a halt jolted me out of my little daydream, which was of a world where I wasn’t a complete loser. I sat up and blinked a few times before I looked at where we were, my face falling into a frown when I seen the all too familiar street. Standing up from my seat at the very back on the bus, I picked up my backpack and slowly made my way down the empty walkway.

“Thanks, George.” I said as I walked down the steps of the bus. I turned around and waved at George who was just closing the doors to the bus. He smiled fondly down at me, then drove off, leaving a trail of smoke in his wake

Sighing deeply, I walked across the street and headed for the small house with the dead grass and chipped paint. I jogged up the stairs and opened the door, my body instantly freezing in the doorway when the first thing I heard was a loud, high pitched scream coming from the direction of my moms room. I quickly threw my backpack onto the ground and ran through the front room, having to dodge all the clutter, and burst into my mums room.

She was sitting on the floor next to her dresser, a empty prescription bottle laying in front of her as she cried loudly into the palms of her hands. I quietly walked across the room and knelt down next to her, my heart constricting when she lifted up her head and gave me the perfect view of her bloodshot eyes that had tears pouring out of them.

“What’s wrong, mum?” I asked her softly, brushing a few stray tears off of her cheek before I bent down and picked up the yellow bottle. I read the label and frowned deeply, seeing they were my moms pain meds that she had just filled not even three days ago. 

“Where’s all the pills?” I asked her quietly as I shook the obviously empty bottle. My mums bottom lip wobbled as she glanced at the bottle I was holding in my hand, a new wave of tears starting to pour out of her eyes and land on her white nightgown.

“I-I sold some of them, Boo Bear. I needed to get some money for groceries and your sisters clothes.” Her voice was so broken and quiet, but I no longer felt sympathy for her. With slow movements, I let the bottle drop from my hand, then I stood up and walked out of the room, not even giving my mom a second glance.

I walked back to the front door and grabbed my bag before I made my way up the creaky stairs. Once I reached the top of the stairs, I heard a song blaring from the first room, meaning Lottie was home and in her room. Instead of stopping, I continued walking and finally stopped at the last door in the hallway. 

I eyed the cracked, brown door for a second before I pushed it open and walked in. I glanced around my room for a second, then threw my backpack on my bed. My room was the smallest in the house, but it was also the cleanest. I had a twin sized bed placed right next to the door, then in the corner of the room, by the closet door, I had a small brown dresser that had a few pictures and things I have collected throughout the years on it. Other than those, the long mirror in front of my window, and the Three days grace poster that was hanging on my wall, my room was bare.

Closing my door and locking it, I plopped down on my bed and pulled out my Iphone that my nan had gotten for me last Christmas. I unlocked the screen and went to my music, putting on a random song I don’t remember buying before I sat up and grabbed my backpack. Just as I was about to open it, someone began to bang loudly on my door.

Groaning loudly, I leaned over and unlocked it. Before I could even move my hand out of the way, my door was being thrown open and my mum came storming into my room. Right as I glanced up at her, a yellow pill bottle was being thrown at me. Before I could catch it, it hit my right in the forehead and bounced off, landing on my mattress.

“What was..” Before I could finish speaking my mum told me to shut up. I watched as she began to pace the room, her bony fingers threading through her long brown hair. She tugged at her hair for a second, then she suddenly turned her head to the side and pinned my eyes with her wild brown eyes.

“Why did you steal my pills, Louis?” She asked, her eyes going into slits as she stared at me. I tilted my head to the side and stared up at her, trying to figure out what the hell she was talking about. 

“What are you talking about? I didn’t take your pills.” I leaned down and picked up the bottle, my frown deepening when I seen it was a completely different bottle than the one that we had downstairs. I read the name, my eyes widening when I seen it wasn’t my moms name.

“Don’t fucking lie to me Louis! I know it was you! You stole them from me because you hate me! You want your mother to be in pain!” Her voice grew louder and louder with each word she spoke, and her words were slightly slurred. 

She soon began to pace the room again, but this time she was even more frantic. I watched her for a second, my teeth clenching together when I seen how she was tilted to the side as she walked. She was drunk off of her ass, and I scold myself for not realizing this sooner.

“The pills are down in your room, mum.” I lied fluently, smiling reassuringly at her when she stopped pacing at looked at me. I nodded my head a little, wanting to get her out of my room, and her watched as her thin lips stretched into a smile, revealing her crooked, yellowish teeth. She slowly walked forward to me, her arms open like she was going to give me a hug like she did every other time she yelled at me. 

But just as she reached me, her face fell into a glare and she lifted her hand up and brought it down. I let out a loud cry of pain when my cheek began to sting painfully. Tears instantly began to cloud my vision, making my mum a blurred blob that was standing in front of me with a shocked look on her face.

Without another word, she turned around and walked out of the room, mumbling something under her breath as she walked away. I cried silently, my left hand caressing my cheek as I tried to soothe it. I sniffled quietly and stood up, deciding to go to Lottie’s room. I grabbed my phone off of my bed and turned off the music before I walked through my open door and down the hallway, stopping when I reached Lottie’s door.

Without knocking, because there was really no use considering how loud her music was blaring, I pushed her door open and the smell of marijuana instantly wafted out of her room, the smoke swirling around me before it disappeared down the hallway. I coughed loudly and walked into the room, spotting Lottie perched on her bed with a glass pipe in one hand, a lighter in the other and an open bag of marijuana in her lap. 

“Jesus, Fizzy.” I groaned and coughed, already feeling my body starting to feel light just from inhaling all the smoke that was in the room. I closed the door softly and turned off the music, then I walked across the room and took a seat at the bottom of her bed.

Grinning widely, Lottie lifted the pipe up to her lips and flicked the lighter, the green marijuana burning bright as she inhaled deeply and lit it. She had lasted not even five seconds before she turned into a coughing, spluttering mess. Her blue eyes were bloodshot and her pupil was huge, signaling that she was already baked off of her ass.

“Want some?” She asked when she finally stopped coughing. She lifted up both of her hands and offered me the pipe and lighter, which I hesitated to take but finally did. Cautiously, I lifted the pipe up to my lips and held my finger over the hole, which Lottie had told me the name for numerous times but I can never remember it. 

Closing my eyes tightly, I flicked the lighter and lit it, holding the burning flame over the weed and inhaling deeply. My lungs were instantly clouded with the smoke from the marijuana and my throat began to burn. I held the smoke in for as long as I could but only seconds had passed before I started to cough loudly. I took a few more hits, after I had calmed down, and the memories from my mom hitting me earlier began to fade away, as well as the pain in my cheek. 

The moment when I felt like I was riding a spaceship, I had decided that I had smoked enough and I gave it back to Lottie, who greedily took it. I watched through hooded eyes as she emptied the pipe, then refilled it with new weed. Laughing at nothing in particular, I laid down on her mattress and watched the white ceiling.

“I met a new, hot boy today.” I suddenly said, the need to talk about him growing stronger with each memory of him that flashed through my mind. Every time a picture of him smiling flashed through my mind I felt the same tug in my stomach that I felt when he was actually standing in front of me and smiling. 

I heard Lottie take another hit off of the pipe before there was a quiet clank as she set it down on her stand. The next thing I knew, the spot on the bed next to me was dipping down and a body was being pressed against my side. “How cute?” She asked, laying her arm on top of mine as she laid almost parallel to me.

“Supermodel cute.” I whispered, giggling loudly as I thought about what he would look like walking down a runway in fancy clothes, his long legs being perfectly shown off in cute short shorts. Shaking the disturbing, but sexually appealing, image out of my head, I rolled onto my side and made it so my nose brushed against Lottie’s cheek.

“He was nice too.” This time my voice was quiet. I was afraid that if I spoke too loudly that my mom would hear us even though she was downstairs in her room. I stared at the side of Lottie’s face, her long eyelashes fanning across her cheek each time she blinked.

The room was silent for a few minutes until Lottie let out a deep breath, her chest deflating noticeably which made me giggle for some odd reason. “Put some ice on your cheek later. It’ll help with the pain.” Fizzy mumbled quietly, which made my giggling cease because of the sudden change of topic. 

I closed my eyes, not answering her for a second, and focused on how light and fuzzy my body felt right now. I didn’t want my good mood ruined because of something as simple as my mom slapping my cheek, but I know it was something we needed to talk about. Me and Lottie always talked to each other. We have been each other’s rocks since before I could remember.

She has been there for me every time something goes wrong, including the times my mom gets to how she is tonight and decides to lash out on us, and i’ve been there for her. It wasn’t uncommon for our mom to hit us or for something to go wrong in our life, but we have grown used to it. We had to. Without Spence living here anymore, we have been the ones that had to hold not only ourselves together, but our mom and everything else too. 

“It doesn’t hurt too bad. She was drunk and most likely high on her pills, so she didn’t put too much force behind the slap.” I said after a few more seconds of silence. I cautiously lifted a hand up to my cheek and gently brushed my fingers over it, cringing softly. “It’ll still leave a bruise.” I added, squeezing my eyes shut tightly when I felt my brain start to work again, which I didn’t want.

That’s the only reason I got high, was to shut my brain up so I could get a few hours of silence. If it wasn’t for my brain constantly overworking, I wouldn’t even think about touching any types of drugs or alcohol. But I know I need to stop smoking and drinking as much. I’ve come to rely on the feeling it gives me. The peacefulness I get from them is great, but I don’t want to turn into my mother. I don’t want to rely on something to keep me happy. I want to rely on myself, and nobody else.

Breathing out a deep breath, I roll back onto my back and push myself up into a sitting position. I tilt to the side a little but somehow I manage to stand up and walk to the door, even though the world feels like it is spinning. It was somewhat uncomfortable, to be honest, but I knew if I waited for a few minutes to an hour, the level I was on would soon lower.

“I’m going to lay down.” I muttered and opened the door, taking a deep breath of stale, non-smoky air. I closed the door softly behind me and drug myself to my room, not having enough strength to even pick up my feet.

I walked into my bedroom and closed the door behind me. With a tired sigh, I push my backpack off of my bed and plug my phone into the charger before I lay down on my bed. I didn’t have much time to think because the moment my head made contact with the pillow, I was out. My body had been so relaxed from the weed that it made my already tired body even tireder. 

That night, well day, my dreams had been full of green eyes, pale skin, curly brown hair, and plump pink lips.


	5. Chapter 5

Waking up the next morning to the sound of my alarm clock going off, I groaned loudly and rolled onto my stomach. I blindly searched for my phone, wanting nothing more than to have the obnoxious beeping noise silenced. When I got absolutely no luck in finding it, I sat up slowly and rubbed my dry eyes with my palms before I looked around the room, spotting my phone across the room on my dresser, still plugged into the charger.

Rubbing my eyes one more time, I stood up and turned off my alarm clock before I walked out of my room and down the hall, going straight for the bathroom. I quickly did my business then washed my hands, grimacing when I looked at myself in the mirror. My brown hair was sticking all over the place, I had dried drool running along my right cheek, my blue eyes were slightly red from me leaving my contacts in all night, and my left cheek was still red, my mom’s hand print being slightly visible.

Shaking my head, I leave the bathroom and go back to my room so I can start getting ready for the day. I open my closet and pull out a new pair of black jeans, a white shirt and my only other hoodie. I stripped off my clothes, throwing them in the corner of my room, and pulled on my pants, followed by my shirt. I glanced at myself through the mirror, frowning when I seen my tattoo across my chest, which was “It is what it is”, was visible through the white material of my shirt.

“Whatever,” I mumble, my voice still being thick with sleep. I yawned loudly and rummaged through my drawer, looking for my contact case which I found a few seconds later. I take out my contacts carefully, put them in the case, then grab my glasses out of my drawer. I put them on reluctantly, my frown deepening at the feeling of my glasses hugging the bridge of my nose.

I shook my head, my glasses falling down a little, and ran my fingers through my hair. When I finally managed to get all of it down, I brushed it to the side of my face and pulled on my hoodie. With one more glance at myself in the cracked mirror standing against my window, I decided I looked good enough and grabbed my backpack and phone. I slipped my phone into my pocket and hefted my backpack up onto my shoulder.

As I walked down the stairs, I couldn’t help but think about my dream last night but the harder I tried to remember it, the more blurry it became. The moment I reached the last step, the smell of something cooking in the kitchen reached my nose. Being the nosy person I am, I made my way into the kitchen and seen Lottie at the stove, her long hair tied up in a ponytail as she cooked what appeared to be eggs.

“Want some?” She asked, making me jump slightly. Her back was still to me as she cooked, but she still managed to know I was in the kitchen. Just at the mere mention of food my stomach churned uncomfortably. I always had an upset stomach the day after I smoked weed if I didn’t eat anything, which I rarely did. 

“No thanks. I need to head out so I can wait for the bus.” I kindly declined her offer. I already got enough shit at school, imagine how much more shit I would get if I puked all over the school bus. Cringing at the thought, I told Lottie a quick goodbye, put on my shoes, then walked through the front door.

Inhaling the fresh, crisp air, I shoved my hands into my the pockets on my hoodie and walked across the street to where to bus usually picked me up. I had about ten minutes before the bus would should up, but if I stayed in the house for one more minute, I would most definitely vomit.

The downfall of having to wait so long, was that it gave my brain a chance to actually start working. I thought back to what happened yesterday with my mom. She had already told me that she had sold some of her pills, but based on the almost empty fridge and the few article of clothing’s Lottie had gotten, she hadn’t sold that much.

Pulling my hands out of my pockets, I began rubbing small circles into my temple. I had been awake for less than half an hour and my brain was already giving me a headache. Oh, the joys of having an overactive mind.

I waited until the bus was completely empty before I stood up from my seat and slowly walked down the aisle. I wished George a good day as I got off the bus, but I didn’t get a response as usual. George was mostly mute. He would talk when necessary, but he was more comfortable when he didn’t have to. Kinda like I was more comfortable when I was alone.

Subconsciously, my eyes roam over the outside of the school. I didn’t know what I had been looking for until a ball of disappointment nestled its way into the pit of my stomach when I didn’t spot the curly head that I had wanted to see. Bowing my head, to avoid making eye contact with anyone, I finished walking up the stairs that lead to the front door of the school.

Quickly glancing up to make sure no one was in the way, I pushed the door open and walked through it. Warm air washed over me and enveloped my slightly chilly skin. Out of habit, I pulled the hood up on my head and bowed my head once again, not wanting to chance of someone seeing the red hand print that was prominent against my light skin.

Never having to look up, because I knew this school like the back of my hand, I made my way to my first period class, which was health. I easily moved through the light crowd of students in the hallways even with my head bowed. In the mornings the hallways weren’t as crowded, which I was thankful for. If I had to deal with all the obnoxious teens this early in the morning, I would honestly go crazy, or have a major panic attack.

Walking through the door to the most disturbing class in the history of classes, I made my way to my desk that was in the back. Another one of the perks of being the socially awkward kid that nobody likes, is that all the teachers let you sit wherever you want because they pity you. And I just so happen to enjoy sitting in the back of the class, away from all the chit chat. 

I grabbed my health folder out of my backpack before I set down and slid my bag under my seat. I placed my heels on the edge of my bag to make sure it wouldn’t move at all during this period. Last year, during science, a student ended up taking my bag and dumping milk in it, ruining all of the work I had finished. It may have only taken me less than an hour to redo everything, but it was still a struggle I never wanted to go through again. 

For the entire first period nothing interesting happened except for when an office aid came in and told Mr. Johnson that Seth wouldn’t be in because he ended up having an accident in football practice yesterday after school. That alone made my day even better than anything else possibly could have. My next four periods after Health flew by fast, but the moment the bell rang signaling it was lunch time, I felt myself freeze in my seat. 

I spent lunch in Mrs. Black’s room.

Harry would be there, unless he found someone else to sit with, or he didn’t come to school today because I haven’t even seen him. Even thinking of not seeing Harry today made my mood drop drastically. Shaking off the sudden mood change, I put my assignment in the basket next to the door and fast walked to Mrs. Black's room.

The moment I turned down the quiet hallway her classroom was in, my pace slowed down to a slow crawl. I was having a mental war in my head. A part of me just wanted to get to the class already so I could see Harry, but another part of me didn't want to see him at all. And, in the very back of my mind, a small voice reminded me that he may not even be in her classroom. 

Biting down on my tongue, I mentally prepared myself for the worse case scenario as I walked through her open classroom door. I didn't know what I had been expecting, but the sight in front of me was not at all what I was expecting. At least I didn't think it was.

Sitting in the back of the classroom with Mrs. Black and Mr. Daniel was Harry. He had a deep scowl on his face as he stared down at the ground, clearly not listening to a word they were saying. My eyebrows furrowed as I walked further into the classroom, taking a seat at the same table I was sitting at yesterday. 

At the sound of the table squeaking softly when I put my backpack down on it, everybody’s eyes snapped over to me. I blushed a dark shade of red and looked down at my hands as I twiddled my thumbs, not at all meaning to disturb their conversation that sounded not only serious, but heated.

“Sorry, I’ll leave.” I mumbled, not taking my eyes off of my thumbs even as I stood up. I heard someone clear their throat, like they were trying to get my attention, before a large hand was being placed on my shoulder. Not flinching away or removing their hand, I looked up at Mr. Daniel, the hoodie still blocking most of my face, and seen his chocolate brown eyes were no longer warm, but stern?

Looking questioningly up at him, he shook his head softly and his lips fell into a thin line. Nodding my head, I slipped my fidgeting hands into my pockets and allowed Mr. Daniel to escort me of the classroom and down the hall a few feet away from the door. When we got to a spot he seemed to find good enough, he stopped and moved so he was standing in front of me, a few feet between us.

“How much do you know about Harry?” He asked, his voice going lower as he spoke. I looked up at him, surprised by his question. I didn’t know him at all. I knew his name and that he liked to talk about asses, but other than that, what did I know about him?

He has dreamy ass eyes.

Flushing a bright pink color at my thoughts, I looked down at my black shoes and shrugged a little, my shoulders just barely uplifting. “I don’t really know him, why?” I took deep breaths and tried to change my direction of thought, but I had no luck at all. My mind was now racing with all the memories of yesterday, my blush going deeper as Harry’s words about my butt rang in my head.

“Because, he got into a fight with Seth Clark yesterday after school.” 

My body going stiff at the mention of my biggest bully, I looked up at Mr. Daniel, my eyes wide and my lips slightly parted. Due to the shock, I didn't even bother pulling up my hood that had slipped back a little before it finally fell off, revealing my cheek completely. 

"W-Why.” I cursed myself for stuttering in a moment as serious as now, but I didn't have too long to think about how stupid I sounded before my thoughts were consumed with Harry and Seth.

Why did they get into a fight? Did Harry win? Well clearly he did. It didn't look like he had one mark on his body. Relief washed over me, followed by a burst of happiness. Harry had beat up my bully. My bully, who I had once thought to be invincible, was now at home in bed, probably to sore or scared to even bother coming to school.

My curiosity got the best of me and without waiting for Mr. Daniels to respond, I turned around and all but skipped to the room. “You beat up Seth.” I blurted the moment I was in the room. I wanted to cover my mouth with my hands, but I was too happy right now to even try and screen what I was saying.

“Why? Did he get hurt? How bad was the fight? What started it?” Questions raced through my mind, but no matter how fast I spoke, I couldn’t manage to ask all of them.

I gasped a deep breath in and looked at Harry, who was staring at me with amusement etched into his features. I quickly covered my mouth with my hand, realizing that even though I didn't want to, I needed to. It was the only thing I knew would keep me from asking anymore questions. I was just happy right now, ecstatic, really. It wasn't everyday that you get told your bully got beat up.

Besides, if it hadn't been the principle that had told me about the fight, I wouldn't have believed it. Especially since Harry’s shoulders weren't as broad and his muscles weren't as big. He may be taller than him, but I never would have thought that Harry could beat the shit out of Seth. But since yesterday, I have learned there is more to Harry styles than meets the eyes.

“He cried like a little bitch,” pausing, Harry leaned forward and placed his chin in his hand, his pointer finger running along his bottom lip as he tried to suppress his smile, but it was a fail. “He started the fight by throwing a football at me.” Harry said and shrugged. I was practically bouncing in anticipation, wanting, no, needing more information. But when a few minutes passed by without Harry saying anything else, I groaned loudly and flopped down in my seat.

“You suck at giving information.” I informed him, my arms folding tightly over my chest as my face fell into a pout. My body maybe literally feeling as if it was going to explode from happiness at any second, but it was starting to fade. The happiness was soon being replaced with worry. Worry of what was going to happen to Harry. Was he going to get suspended, expelled even?

“What's going to happen to Harry?” I asked before I could even stop myself. I turned to look at Jen anxiously, my teeth clasping around my already chewed raw bottom lip. It was a bad habit that I needed to stop doing, but for some reason, it made me calm. Well, as calm as I possibly could get without smoking some ‘devils lettuce’.

“Since it was not during school hours, and Seth did start the fight, Harry will be placed in two weeks of in school suspension and Seth will be spending the next two weeks at home.” Winking at me, Jen mouthed something I couldn’t catch, then turned her attention back down to her paperwork.

A squeal built it’s way up my throat, and before I could stop it, it was echoing in the quiet room. Jen didn’t look up from her paperwork, but Harry’s head snapped in my direction when he heard the girlish noise. I just shrugged my shoulders and grinned widely, my eyes crinkling at the corners and I honestly couldn’t care. I was too happy right now to care about something as stupid as me looking like a complete moron. I was two weeks bully free. That means I would be able to walk down the hallways without the fear of someone pushing me into my locker or tripping me.

Having Harry here may not be such a bad thing after all.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this chapter Is a little different. It jumps back to the same day as last chapter for the first half of the story, and it's in Harry's pov! When you guys see these ~~~ that means it jumps back to the recent day.

This school is shit. The teachers are shit. The students are shit. Everything about this entire school is complete and utter shit. I would rather go back to my old school where I was constantly fighting people, then be here where everybody is interested in me or afraid of me. Although, having people be afraid of me really isn't a disadvantage. It makes it easier for me to stay to myself during the day.

The only thing that has even remotely caught my attention here is the boy with the round ass... What's his name again? Lance? No. That doesn't sound right. Levi? No, that's not it. What is it? I know it starts with an L, or is it a B? I growl loudly in frustration as I make my way through the hallways. I had literally just walked away from him. Why can’t I remember his bloody name.

Shaking my head, I push my way through the crowds of students and make my way towards what I think is the door to the back of the school, but after a while of walking, I find myself lost. I stop in the middle of the hallway and glance around my surroundings, though they were hard to see with all the people crowding it. “Grubby morons.” I growl under my breath as I take a chance and walk through the red door that was across from the bathrooms.

Where the hell am I?

There were about five different lines of students, each one beginning by the door at the other end of what appeared to be the lunchroom. Sighing in frustration, I go to turn around to walk away but out of the corner of my eye, I seen a boy at the back of the line with a black hoodie on that was practically drowning him. 

Smirking, I walk around the lines of students and stop when I was on the other side of the lunchroom. I stood behind a tall Jock in a red and black jersey, making it so I was almost completely hidden, but I had to crouch because I was a few inches taller than him. I stayed there, staring at the back of what's his name, and having absolutely no idea as to why I was hiding from him.

/Because you’re being a creep by staring at him./

Grinning, and not even denying the thought that I was a creep, I watched in amusement as he looked around the lunchroom. He looked in my direction twice, but he didn’t spot me which made this that much more entertaining for me. I chuckled quietly when he turned back around, giving me a perfect view of his surprisingly nice ass. It was perfectly round and just the right size.

Licking my lips, I walked from behind the guy and snuck up behind Louis. I had just leaned into whisper in his ear when he suddenly turned around and slammed right into my chest. My first instinct was to grab him by his upper arm, which I did. My long, slim fingers wrapped around his upper arm and I easily pulled him up straight, not letting go of him until I was sure he had gained his balance back.

“Harry.” He whispered, and if I hadn’t been standing so close, I wouldn’t have heard him. For some odd reason I felt my stomach do a flip when he glanced up at me, revealing his blue eyes that I have found reminded me of the sky. 

I inhaled softly, being inaudible to Louis, and was about to take a step back but he beat me to it. Needing to change to subject, to get my mind off of the way my stomach had flipped, I said the first thing that came to my mind. “Watch where you're going. I mean, you have some pretty decent air bags but a fall that hard would still hurt.” He stared at me for a second, confusion evident on his face. I couldn’t help but wonder if that big brain of his would be able to catch onto what I was talking about.

Finally, I got the reaction I had been waiting for. He blushed a light shade of pink and looked down at the ground, his hands going behind him to cover his butt. I internally snorted because of course. Only Louis would cover his butt when I was standing on the other side of him. That’s his name! Louis Tomlinson! I did a happy dance on the inside as I branded his name into my brain, repeating it over and over again so I wouldn’t forget it again. 

“I thought you were going home.” I heard him mumble, and if I wasn’t mistaken, it sounded more like a statement rather than a question. Nodding my head, I folded my arms over my chest and leaned back on my heels slightly, my eyes quickly roaming over the lunchroom for a second. I seen a few people pointing at the two of us and laughing, though I had a feeling in the pit of the stomach that they weren’t laughing at /me/. 

A deep growl built up my raw throat but before it could escape, I quickly chuckled. I was doing good in this school. I mean, a little growl wouldn’t hurt anything but based on the way Louis talks and acts, he’s already bullied so I didn’t want to do something to scare him away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it’s a shocker that I didn’t want to scare someone away, but I quite enjoyed mine and Louis’ tutoring sessions. It was nothing more than that, though. 

/Yeah, Style’s, keep lying to yourself./ 

“I am, but you're in my way.” It was an obvious lie, and he would know it too if he were to take his eyes off of me and glance around the now emptying lunch room. I ripped my gaze away from the group of girls that were laughing at us, just in time to see Louis’ eyes widen, making him look even more innocent than he already did, before he stepped aside and allowed me access to walk past him, making me roll my eyes.

“Sorry.” He whispered, glancing up at me from underneath his long, thick, black eyelashes. I felt my breathing hitch in my throat, and to cover it up, I chuckled and shook my head, my curly hair flying around my head. I knew my dimples had popped out, as I had intended. My dimples were my signature move. They always had girls, and boys fawning over me.

“See ya later, Tomlinson.” I murmured, still proud at myself for remembering his name. I brushed past him as I walked out of the lunchroom and as much as I wanted to, I didn’t glance back at him. I kept my gaze forward, for most of my walk, anyway. When I had passed by the girls, I couldn’t help but glare at them. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt them, of course, but I found it fun to watch them pale and squirm under my gaze.

Pushing the door open, which actually lead to outside, I took long strides towards the side of the school. I had gotten a few feet away from the door when I felt something pelt me in the middle of my back. I stumbled forward a little, but luckily for me, I caught myself. Turning around slowly, I bent down and picked up the ball before I looked up through slitted eyes.

“Watch where you throw your fucking ball.” I growled, clutching it tightly in my fist before I turned sideways and easily threw it up on the roof. I heard a few of the people that were outside gasp, but I didn’t have much time to look around before I was being shoved.

“You better climb up there and get my fucking ball.” Someone yelled right in my ear. Straightening up, I threw my backpack down onto the ground and pinned the tall, though shorter than me, jock with blonde hair and broad shoulders, with my darkening gaze.

/What the fucks up with his nose? It looks like a fucking hook./

Clenching my hands into fists, I took a step forward and looked down at him, my eyes flaring with anger. “Or what? What are you going to do about it?” I asked, my hands shaking at my sides as I tried to control my anger. I hadn’t been in a fight for about three weeks, which was a new record for me. The longest I have gone without fighting since I had turned eight was four days, and even then I had enough pent up anger that I ended up bashing a guy’s head into the concrete. So, imagine how bad this stupid jock would be if he didn’t use his brain and step the fuck away from me. 

We stared at each other for a second, me fuming, and him grinning. I was just about to turn around and walk away, realizing nothing was going to happen, when a fist connected with the side of my face. My head snapped to the right and a dull ache began in my jaw before it spread throughout my entire face.

I flexed my jaw for a second, to try and control my rage, but that didn’t help. The next thing I knew I was on top of the jock, my hard fist connecting with his face over, and over again. With each punch I could feel something pop or break in his face, and I was relishing the feeling. I growled loudly and with one finally punch to his face, a loud crunching noise was heard, and felt, before a gush of blood came spilling out of his nose. 

I panted heavily and stared down at him, satisfaction filling my body. “Don’t ever fucking touch me.” I growled and stood to my feet, leaving him a crumpled, almost unconscious mess on the ground. I bent down to pick up my backpack, only to have my right bicep grabbed in a firm grip. Tensing my body, and readying it for another fight, I turned to my side and lifted up my free fist, only to come face to face with Mr. Daniel.

“I see you’ve been busy, Mr. Styles.” He said, and I swear I seen a faint smirk dancing on his lips. I took a deep breath in and bent down to grab my backpack before I stood back up, clenching the strap to the grey bag tightly between my fist.

“I guess this is where you tell me you’re going to call my dad?” I said dryly, already knowing how this worked. I got caught, my dad got called, and I was either suspended or expelled, depending on how bad the person was injured. Glancing behind my shoulder at the jock whose hair was now matted with his blood, I smirked. He wasn’t too bad, considering how much damage I could have done.

Letting go of my arm, and catching my attention, Mr. Daniel turned around and walked to the cafeteria door, holding it open and gesturing for me to follow him. “After you.” He said when I reached the door. I rolled my eyes and popped my sore knuckles before I walked through the door, already knowing I was about to get into a shit load of trouble all because a stupid, small pricked jock couldn’t leave me alone.

~~~~~

 

I only got grounded for two months, plus two weeks of in school suspension. Considering the fact that I had broke the jocks nose, whose name I later learned was Seth, I thought my punishment was pretty light. My dad confiscated my phone and laptop the moment we got home, but I could really care less. I barely used them. The only thing I did use them for was porn and music, nothing too exciting.

Alright, back to the present. I was currently sitting in Mrs. Black’s rooms. Louis was sitting across from me, the eraser to his pencil between his teeth as he read a book we got assigned in english today. He had literally started reading not even ten minutes ago and he was halfway done with it, which was pretty fucking creepy if you asked me. Nobody should be able to read that fast.

Sighing, I leaned forward and folded my arms on the table, my green eyes wandering over his face. The left side of his face was hidden from the way he was sitting, but I could see the right side of his face perfectly. He had a small, button nose that I found oddly adorable, thin lips that I imagined would feel great wrapped around my cock, a small chin and long eyelashes that fanned out across his cheeks each time he blinked.

“Would you please stop staring? It makes me uncomfortable.” He said, startling me and making me jump slightly. I raised an eyebrow and leaned back in my seat, propping my feet up on the table and crossing my arms over my chest. I don’t know why, but I found this position oddly comfortable.

“I was just wondering why you’ve been hiding the left side of your face.” I said, only being half truthful. I had wondered why his face was covered, but the reason why I was staring at him was because I was trying to remember each detail on his face. I would deny that though, if anyone ever asked.

Louis suddenly went still in his chair, his hand that was holding the pencil going up to his hoodie and pulling it further down, completely hiding the left side of his face and exposing the right side. He mumbled something under his breath that I couldn’t hear before he returned to his book, his body staying rigid in his seat. I tilted to my side, my curiosity suddenly spiking. 

Leaning forward, I quickly pulled the hoodie down and moved his head to the side in one swift movement. My eyes studied his face for a second, my teeth clenching together tightly when I seen the red, prominent handprint on his cheek that was starting to turn blue around the edges. 

“What happened?” I asked through clenched teeth, ignoring the yelp of surprise Louis emitted. Standing up from his chair quickly, which resulted in it falling on the floor, Louis scooped up all of his belongings, hiding his face from me all the while.

He swiftly turned around and walked out of the room, not telling me or Jen where he was going. I let my hands fall down to my sides as I glanced at Jen, who only gave me an apologetic look before she returned to her computer. I had the urge to follow after Louis and demand an answer, but I knew if I even stepped foot out of this class I would triple my suspension time. I growled loudly and ran a hand through my hair as I set down, my gaze lingering on the door for a second. 

/What kind of secrets do you have in that pretty little mind of yours, Louis Tomlinson?/

He had secrets, that was obvious, but I planned on discovering each and every single one of them. Whether he liked it or not.


	7. Chapter 7

**_~2 weeks later~_ **

 

I haven’t talked to Harry for two weeks, not since he had seen the bruise on my cheek, which has faded since then. He had tried to talk to me many times. Many, many times, but I never even looked at him. After about a week of failed attempts, he finally gave up which I was thankful for. I was on the verge of breaking and talking back to him, but on the same day I had decided that, he didn’t even look at me nor attempt to talk to me, so I didn’t either.

Today was Friday, December 21, which meant today was the last day of school before Christmas break started. Groaning at the realization, I angrily scribbled down my answer on my math assignment. The numbers were sloppy and the graphs were tilted, but I didn’t give two shits right now.

My mind was a jumbled mess, my mood was shit and the fact that not only Christmas, but my birthday, was so close made my already crap mood ever crappier. As if it wasn’t enough to have one holiday I hated in a month, but two? Come on. If that didn’t show how unlucky I was, I have no idea what will.

I didn’t always hate my birthday or Christmas, but when I was just a few minutes shy of my eighth birthday, my dad had decided he didn’t want to have the responsibility of a family so he left us. He packed all of his bags, took all the credit cards and left with everything my mom had, including her sanity. He left us with a broken mom, thousands of dollars of debt and a bad memory of Christmas. Since then, we really don’t celebrate either of the days. To us, they are just another day, and I was beyond thankful for that.

The sound of the bell brought me out of my little daze. I shook my head and refocused on my paper, squeaking quietly when I seen I had only answered three of the questions and two of the answers were wrong. I glanced around the room, making sure no one was watching me, before I quickly shoved the paper into my back and ran out of the classroom.

_ What the hell was wrong with me? _

I felt tears pricking my eyes as I walked down the hallway. I kept my head down and my hood pulled up, my blurry eyes focusing on the floor as I walked. I turned when was necessary and quickened my pace when I was around people, but I didn’t glance up the entire time I walked towards Mrs. Black’s room.

I wanted nothing more than for the classroom to be empty when I walked in, but it wasn’t. Jen, as well as three other students-- none of them being Harry-- were sitting in her room, all of them laughing about something ridiculous, or so I imagine. I was tempted to turn around and walk out of the classroom because I honestly didn’t know if I would be able to handle all the laughing and shit going on. But with one more glance at them, I decided why the hell not and walked over to my now permanent seat.

I placed my backpack on the table and instead of sitting in my seat, I jumped-- yes jumped, up onto the brown table top. The table squeaked under my weight and swayed a little, a few bolts being loose, but after a few seconds it stopped moving and the room was once again filled with nothing but Jen’s loud voice as she talked to the student’s that were sitting around her desk.

I rolled my eyes and placed my palms behind me, making it so I could lean back on them. I kicked my legs back and forth, my feet hanging about a foot off of the ground. I tried focusing on anything in the room that would take my mind off Christmas. Tears still burned my eyes, but if someone were to notice, I'd just tell them I used saline solution to wet my contacts.

My bottom lip slipped between my teeth as I stared at a poster on the wall of a turtle racing a rabbit. I found it funny, but I also knew the meaning behind it. Even though they were moving at different paces, they were giving the race their all and eventually both of them would cross the finish line, even if they were at different times. Jen was trying to show her students that even if they were a little slower at doing their work, if they gave their work their all, they would cross the finish line with all the other students.

The poster was a good thing to have in a room constantly full of troubled student’s. I’m sure that only a few of them understood what it meant, but it was best if at least a few did. Shaking my head, I turned to look at Jen who was standing up from her chair with her keys to the backroom in hand.

Quickly jumping down from the table, I pushed in all the chairs that were pulled out and gave her a clear walkway. She smiled softly at me and unlocked the brown door before she walked in and was disappeared in the darkness. I leaned against the table and watched as there was a loud crashing noise, followed by a string of curse words and the light flicking on.

I covered my mouth with my hand to stifle my giggle, my bad mood lifting a little. I heard her curse a few more times before she emerged from the room with a bunch of different decorations in her arms. I leaned my head to the side, trying to get a better view of all the things in her arms, but she made it so her back was facing me as she walked back over to her desk, having to squeeze past all the students, and set all the decorations under her desk.

I ignored my bubble of curiosity and glanced around the room, my mood once again plummeting when I, for the second time this period, realized Harry wasn’t here. He was probably too busy beating the shit out of another kid, or enjoying his freedom that he had just got back today, which had shocked me considering how much trouble he has gotten in since then. Speaking of which, Seth wouldn’t be returning to school until Christmas break was over on January 3.

Sighing, I sat down in my actual seat and pulled out my homework, deciding I need to fix the problems I had missed and finish it. By the time the bell rang, signaling lunch was over, I was completely done with the three paged assignment that we were supposed to be doing over the break, but I didn’t bothering waiting.

I put everything into my bag and walked out of the classroom, following after the three other students. My head was bowed as I took a step over the threshold, but the moment I did, I was being hauled backwards by a hand on my arm. I dropped my backpack from my arms and turned around, ripping my arm out of the person’s grasp.

Jen stared down at me with a smirk, her arms crossing over her chest and covering the reindeer that was on the middle of her red sweater. “I need you to come to my class after you finish your work in english.” She said, a twinkle of excitement running through her eyes, but just as quickly as it had shown up, it was gone.

I didn’t ask her why, I just nodded my head and picked up my bad, my left hand flattening over my chest for a moment, right above my heart. I felt my heart beating rapidly, each thump hitting against the palm of my hand and making it tingle slightly. I took deep breathes as I walked to class, ignoring a few of the snide comments some of the student’s were yelling at me.

English class, to my utter disappointment, passed by slow and I wasn’t even in there for ten minutes. I had finished the quiz the teacher had gave us on the book we were assigned two weeks ago, in less than five minutes, but I just sat at my desk and chewed on my fingernails for the next five minutes. I didn’t want to draw too much attention to me when I stood up, so I had waited for one of the other students to get up and sharpen their pencil or something before I stood up too.

I grabbed my book bag from the desk beside me and picked up my quiz. I checked over it as I walked back to her desk, making sure there wasn’t any wrong answers like there had been in math, which there wasn’t. I handed the paper to her and was just about to tell her that I needed to leave when there was a knock on the door. Mrs. Anderson was about to stand up but I told her I got it.

Pulling the sleeves to my hoodie down further, I walked over to the door and opened it a little, revealing Harry. He was wearing a black button up shirt, black skinny jeans and brown boots. I slipped my bottom lip between my teeth and glanced up at him, his curls that were usually framing his face now in a tight bun on top of his head. His face was bright red and sweat trickled down his face, meaning he had either ran here or he had been doing something that required a lot of exercise.

_ He was probably fucking someone in the bathroom. _

My stomach churning at the thought, I ripped my gaze away from his and took a step to the side, allowing him to walk into the room. I waved at Mrs. Anderson, who smiled at me and nodded, before I walked through the door. I had expected Harry to walk into the classroom to talk to the teacher, but he followed me instead.

“I’m so fucking sweaty.” He groaned, using the sleeve of his shirt to wipe off his forehead. He was breathing heavily through his nose when he finally caught up to me, his long legs matching my pace easily.

I chose not to answer him and continued walking to Jen’s class, but when we were a few feet from it, Harry grabbed my wrist and began to pull me towards the direction of the library. “What are you doing?” I asked, trying to pull my arm out of his grasp but his finger’s just curled even tighter around it.

I finally gave up and followed him towards the library, my heart doing flips in my chest the entire time we walked. Harry was holding my hand. Well, he wasn’t holding my hand exactly, but he was holding my wrist. It was almost the same thing, right? This small touch, while may seem simple to other people, meant the world to me. Not many people touched me, and not many people who were mad at me touched me, unless it was to cause me pain. But that wasn’t Harry’s intention.

“I’m sorry.” I mumbled, apologizing for the two weeks that I have gave him the cold shoulder. I chanced a glance up at him, my throat going dry when I seen he was staring at me as we walked, and probably had been the entire time.

Sighing deeply, like he was regretting what he was about to say, Harry turned his head and stared at the hallway ahead of us. “It was pretty shitty of you to ignore me.” I would’ve apologized again, but the smile was evident in his voice. I giggled softly and bit my lip, my shitty mood suddenly not being so shitty.

“I-I’m just not used to talking to people or having people be concerned about me.” I whispered and hugged my backpack tighter to my chest. I have never really said that out loud to anyone. I mean, i’ve told Lottie who would smack me and tell me she cares about me, but nobody else. I felt like it made me sound like I was whining, like I / _ wanted/ _ to have someone be there for me, but I didn’t. I was perfectly fine sitting by myself and enjoying my own company.

I stared up at the side of his face and seen how the skin around his jaw stretched tightly as he clenched his jaw. I felt the urge to ask him what was wrong, but before I got the chance, we were walking into the door right next to the Library’s door, the door that belonged to the teacher’s faculty room.

I began to tug on Harry’s hand, knowing we weren’t supposed to be in here without teacher approval. “Harry, stop. We can’t be in her…” My voice died down as I took in the sight in front of me. There was balloons floating all over the room and streamers were hung everywhere. A banner, that had “Happy Birthday” written on it was hanging above the door behind me and Harry.

Harry let go of my hand and I walked further into the room, my chest growing tighter and my eyes watering. When I passed the wall that was blocking the rest of the room, a few people jumped out from their random hiding positions and yelled “Happy Birthday.” My bottom lip wobbled as I looked at all of them. There was a few of my teachers, a few students I helped tutor and Jen.

I felt a tear finally slip past my eye and slide down my cheek, burning my skin. The room was covered in decorations, sure, but that wasn’t what had me so emotional. Sitting on the table in the middle of the room was a white cake with blue frosting around it. Taking a cautious step forward, I seen my name was scrolled across the top in the same blue frosting, and there was a small heart next to the ‘n’ in my last name.

Before I could stop it, ugly tears began to roll down my face and land on my black hoodie, but they were tears of happiness. I looked around at all of them, who were smiling widely at me. Finally, my eyes landed on Harry who was leaning against the wall, his arms folded tightly over his chest. When he seen me looking at me, he smiled softly and mouthed “Happy Birthday Bubble Butt.”

A watery smile stretched my lips, and I soon found myself laughing. Jen had taken the time out of her very busy day to decorate a room for me, and get me a birthday gift. Then realization dawned on me. These decorations were in the bag that she was hiding from me earlier in her classroom. I turned around to thank her, but just as I did, they all began to sing happy birthday to me.

I awkwardly stood in front of them all, my fingers playing nervously with one another. When they had finished, I mumbled a hoarse thank you and walked over to Jen, pulling the taller teacher into a hug. “Happy early birthday, kiddo.” She whispered in my ear, giving me one finally squeeze before she pulled back and looked down at me.

“Thank you.” I said, really not knowing how to reply. “For everything.” I added, and gestured around the room. This was all too much. I wasn't used to having a party. The closest I had gotten to one since my dad had left was the year after and Lottie had baked me a birthday cake. I wasn't complaining though, I didn't like my birthday, like I had said before.

“You should be thanking Harry. This was his idea. He was the one who got the cake during lunch and decorated the room.” The world stopped. The clock on the wall stopped ticking, the people stopped talking, and my heart stopped beating.

I gasped in a deep breath and looked over at Harry, who was talking to a girl. I felt a bubble of jealousy, but the happiness I was feeling right now completely squashed it. The guy that half the school fears now because he beat up not only Seth, but five other of the school's students, had taken time out of his day to decorate a room… For me. He had missed class today just to make sure that I had a good birthday, and in my happy, emotional state, I didn't question how Harry knew when my birthday was. That all seemed unimportant right now as I watched in slow motion as he turned to me and winked, his shoulders uplifting a little in a small shrug.   
  
_ The school badass isn't as bad as he let's on. _   
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read my story! It really means a lot to me! Oh, and if you ever want to make any suggestions for the story, you can always comment on here, message me on gmail (mukesinner1224@gmail.com) or message me on kik (perfectdarkness626)
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this chapter!!! :)

I sat down on the table and crossed my legs, my arms folded in my lap. I watched with bright eyes as everyone in the room chit chatted while eating the cake Harry had gotten me. I had my own plate in my hand that had a big slice of cake, but I didn’t want to eat it. I haven’t eaten today, or yesterday for that matter, and I knew that if I ate something sweet it would make me sick.

Sighing, I grabbed my fork and cut off a small slice of my cake because it looked too damn good to go to waste. Closing my eyes, I lifted the fork to my mouth and slowly pulled the cake off with my lips. My taste buds exploded as I ate the chocolate heaven. The frosting was whipped and the cake was chocolate, but it tasted better than everything I have ever tasted.

I moaned involuntarily, my eyes quickly snapping open when I realized the noise I had just made. I looked around the room, my heart stopping for a split second when I seen Harry making his way towards me, his green eyes dark and his mouth in a tight line. I swallowed my mouth full of cake and grabbed my cup of soda, gulping it faster than I thought I ever could.

I covered my mouth with my hand and burped just as Harry reached me. It wasn’t a loud, obnoxious burp. It was more of a quiet, small one, but it was still embarrassing. I blushed darkly and set my cake next to me. I still had my cup in my hand, but it was now crushed, small droplets of the remaining cherry soda landing on the table right next to my shoe.

“That was very unlady like.” Harry said, nudging my knee with his a little as he climbed up on the table beside me. His long legs dangled over the edge and, unlike me, his feet were able to reach the ground.

“Good thing i’m not a lady.”

“Are you sure about that?” Raising an eyebrow, Harry looked down at me, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. I tilted my head to the side and rubbed my chin with my pointer finger and thumb, humming as I acted like I was in deep thought.

“Last time I checked, I had a penis between my legs.” I said just as Harry took a sip of his soda. Just like I had expected, soda came shooting out of his nose. He coughed and spluttered loudly, his green eyes glossing over as tears threatened to spill past his eyes.

“I didn’t think you knew what a penis was.” He said after he managed to get the coughing under control. His voice was scratchy and thick, making something deep in my stomach twist. I squirmed a little, causing the table to squeak, and looked over at him, refusing to look down or away like I always did.

“I’m not innocent, Harry. I know what a penis is,” I stated matter of factly. “And a vagina.” I added as an afterthought, my nose scrunching up as I said the word that seemed foreign to me. It wasn’t like I had anything against vagina’s, I just didn’t find them that great. I guess it was mainly due to the fact that I was one hundred percent gay, and have known I was since about third grade when I wanted to dance with the cute boy in my class instead of a girl.

“Oh dear god, you know what a vagina is. Someone, alert the press.” Looking at me, he rolled his eyes and grinned that ridiculous grin that made his dimples pop out. I covered my mouth with my hand and laughed loudly, my stomach soon hurting because I wasn’t used to laughing.

Tears collected in my eyes and I was breathless by the time my laughter had died down. I wiped the tears away from my eyes and took a deep breath in, grinning widely at Harry who was shaking his head at me. “What?” I asked, the light mood dropping when I realized that I had just laughed. Like, actually laughed, and I didn’t have to force it either.

I cleared my throat and looked down at the ground, suddenly uncomfortable. “You have cake on your face.” Harry said. My hands flew up to my face, searching for the cake I had on my it, but I couldn’t find any. I turned to look at Harry, only to get a face full of white frosting and brown cake.

“HARRY!” I shrieked, jumping down from the table as I tried to wipe as much cake off my face as I could. I finally managed to clean enough frosting off of my eyes that I was able to open them. The first thing I noticed was the blue frosting that was covering my hands and would most likely stain them.

“Blue’s your color.”

I turned my gaze up to Harry, my eyes going into slits when I seen he was doubled over from laughing so hard. I smirked, for the first time in my life, and grabbed a chunk of cake off the ground. Before Harry had time to react, I stepped over the cake that was on the floor and smeared the cake across his face. Lucky for him, his hair was still pulled up in a tight bun, so I didn’t get much in it. Me, on the other hand, had cake caked in my fringe, and I knew it would be hell to get out.

Laughter bubbled up my throat before it escaped past my dyed blue lips. The moment Harry looked at me, cake smeared across the middle of his face, including his right eyebrow, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to contain it. “You little shit.” I heard Harry growl, but I was too busy clutching my stomach to pay any attention to him.

I should have, though, because the next thing I knew, I was lying on the ground and Harry was hovering over me. He had both of my arms pinned above my head and had one of his knees placed firmly on both of my legs, but he didn’t apply enough pressure to hurt me. I panted as quiet as I could, the laughter gone, and stared up at him through fuzzy eyes.

“You have some cake on your face.” I mumbled, my eyes dancing with humor. I tried to free one of my hands, me clearly not realizing how Harry was right now and how intimate this position would look to others, but had no luck. Tears rolled from the corners of my eyes and landed on the ground, them being proof of my laughing fit.

I was about to talk, but the moment my eyes locked with Harry’s, all the air was knocked out of my lungs. His gaze was intense, far more intense than anyone would be comfortable with, and his eyes were flickering from my eyes, to something a little lower but I had no idea if it was my lips, or the glob of frosting that was on my nose.

_ It’s not your lips, you idiot. _

The little bubble of silence that surrounded us was suddenly broken when Jen called Harry’s name, reminding me that we weren’t alone. Harry quickly let go of my arms and stood up, something flashing in his eyes too quickly for me to catch. He glanced at me one more time before he shook his head and walked towards the direction i’m guessing Jen was in.

When everything became blurry and my lungs began to scream in pain, I was reminded that I needed to breath. I inhaled deeply through my nose and sat up, folding my hands in my lap and glancing down at them. There was red marks around my wrists, from where Harry had been holding them, and the frosting was now semi dry.

I closed my eyes, needing to collect my thoughts that were all over the place. Harry was just pinning me to the ground and I didn’t have a panic attack because someone was touching me. Shaking out all my limbs, I opened my eyes and used the table to help my stand up. There was frosting all over the arms of my hoodie, and the front of my hoodie, which was going to be a bitch to get out.

I groaned under my breath and looked down at the ground where I had been laying, seeing there was squashed cake on the floor. My eyes widening, I quickly reached around and felt my butt. Sure enough, there was cake all over my ass, the brown, blue and white mixture sticking to the material of my blue jeans. I clenched my hands into fists and walked over to the sink. I turned it on before I reached up to grab a few paper towels, having to stand on my tippy toes to even reach it.

“Fucking Harry.” I growled under my breath as I wetted the paper towel. I used the wet paper towels to wipe the frosting off of my face. I had started out just dabbing my face, but I soon grew irritated and began to furiously scrub my face with the paper towels. My skin grew sensitive after a few second, but I could literally feel all the sugar that was seeping into my pores.

I threw down the now blue paper towels with pieces of chocolate hanging off of it, and huffed angrily. I heard the people talking around me, and I knew I shouldn't do what I was about to, but what else could go wrong? I stood up on my tippy toes once again and cupped my hands, splashing my face with the warm water. It felt amazing, honestly. After having that much sugary product smeared across your skin for that long, it began to grow itchy and the water helped with it.

Against my better judgement, I dipped my head down further and got the tip of my fringe wet, where most of the bloody cake was. I kept my eyes opened and watched as blue water swirled down the drain, followed by a couple of clumps of chocolate. Finally, after a few minutes of me leaning over the sink, the water turned mostly clear and my skin no longer felt disgusting.

I turned off the water and ringed out my greasy feeling hair, then stood up and closed my eyes so water wouldn't get in them. I blindly searched for something to dry my hair with, cursing under my breath when I realized I should have grabbed something before hand. I had just reached across what I thought was the counter when something warm was being placed in my hand. I cracked my eye open a little and seen Harry standing in front of me, a white towel in his hand that he was placing in mine.

“Thanks.” I whispered and grabbed the towel from him. As quickly as I could, I dried off my face and my hair, but soon realized that my hair wasn't going to get as dry as I was hoping. I sighed deeply and finally opened my eyes, frowning when I seen Harry was no longer standing in front of me.

I shrugged, not showing how disappointed I really was, and tossed the damp towel onto the counter. The room was no longer full of people. The teachers that were here had left and two of the three students had left to go to Jen’s room so they could actually work. Jen was busy cleaning up the trash that was littered across the room and the remaining student was tearing down the streamers.

I stared at one of the balloons that were floating above me, an idea popping into mind. I grabbed the string from one of the balloons closest to me and tugged it down, making it so the green balloon was eye level. I made sure no one was watching me before I bit a small hole in the bottom of the balloon and inhaled deeply, quickly putting my finger over the hole before I pulled back.

“Do you guys need any help?” I asked, giggling quietly when I heard how ridiculous I sounded. I knew helium made your voice higher pitched, but I had never tried it until now and I found it absolutely hilarious. Jen told me no, and that I could go back to the room. She didn't comment on how childish I had acted today, and I was grateful for it. Grabbing my bag that I had set on the couch, I walked out of the room with the balloon still in hand.

As I was walking towards Jen’s room, the sound of the bell startled me and made my steps falter. The hallway I was in began to fill with students, and it was then that I remembered the cake on my butt. I slipped both of the arms through my backpack straps and let my backpack hang far enough down that it covered my butt, or at least I thought it did.

Shrugging, I began to push my way through the crowds of students. The lunchroom wasn't too far from here, so it meant that I didn't have to walk too long with my backpack hitting against my ass and jostling me forward with each step. I kept the bottom of balloon pinched tightly between my fingers, but I was tempted to let the air out of it. I wouldn't be able to inhale the helium while on the bus and there was no way in hell I would do it while being surrounded by students.

“See ya later Smurf!” I heard someone call from behind me, and the only reason I turned around is because of how recognizable that voice was. A few feet down the hall from me was Harry, a towel draped over his shoulders. His face was no longer covered in cake and his hair was now loose. His wet hair fell in loose waves and the tips brushed against his shoulders, making wet patches on the white material.

Smiling softly, I lifted the balloon up to my lips and inhaled deeply. “In your dreams, Styles!” I hollered, my squeaky voice echoing throughout the long hallway and earning me a few odd glances from some of the students. With that, I spun around and began walking towards the lunchroom once again, paying no attention to the students who were talking about me.

Luckily for me, my line was the first to be called so I didn't have to wait in the lunchroom for a long ass time. And, for the first time in my life, I left school completely and utterly happy.

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so there's a quote in here that I have read somewhere, but I just can't remember where. If I knew who the author was, I would give tag them to give them all the credit, but I can't remember. So, whoever you are, I loved this quote, and I hope you don't mind that I used it!!
> 
> Oh, the quote is... "And so the sky met the grass, such a marvelous blue, and such a vibrant green."

**_January 3_ **

Christmas break was nothing but hell. The first few days I didn’t sleep at all because my mind kept on replaying what had happened between me and Harry on the last day of school before Christmas break had started. And when I wasn’t thinking about that, I was thinking, no dreading as I marked each day off of the calendar. I had stomach knots when I marked off the 24th on my calendar, but like every other year, I didn’t even get a simple ‘Happy birthday’ from anyone.

Christmas was horrible too. I had woken up to find my bedroom window sealed shut from ice. When I had wiped the fog off of the window, I felt like I was going to be sick when I seen all the perfectly white snow that covered the ground and had yet to be touch, that  _ wouldn't  _ be touched. I can’t lie and say I wasn’t tempted to go out there and play in it, because I had wanted to. But I remembered the last time I had played in the snow, which was with my dad, and the thought instantly vanished from my mind.

Today was the first day back to school, which meant I would have new classes. I had to force myself to climb out of bed and even get dressed that day. I had been too lazy to care about what I wore, so I just decided on a simple pair of grey jeggings and my only black hoodie that I had left. My other one was in the laundry room, if you could even call it that, and it had blue stains littered across the front of it. I had scrubbed, and scrubbed, and scrubbed it, but that stupid blue shit wouldn’t come out of it.

Gritting my teeth at the memory, I pushed the front door to the school open with more force than was necessary. The metal door swung back on its hinges and hit against the wooden wall loudly before it swung back towards me. I huffed and side stepped it, my fingernails digging into the palms of my hands. I was very grumpy today, and I had no idea why.

_ Stop lying. Seth is coming back today. _

Frowning at the thought, I stopped by the office to get my new schedule but they informed me that one of Mrs. Black’s students had already came in to get it. When I asked them a name, the woman shrugged and said that he was too new and that she had yet to catch onto his name. That was the only information I needed to know that it was Harry that had came and got my bloody schedule. Jen probably didn’t even send him either.

I stomped down the hallway, the sound my feet were making going unnoticed because of all the noise that filled the hallways. I turned around the corner quickly and almost collided with someone. My vision was filled with a red and black, and before I had the chance to step back, someone was pushing me against the wall.

My head bounced off of the wall and my back scream in pain as thumbtacks dug into it. I hissed softly in pain, tears pricking my eyes, and slowly looked up. Fear flooded my body and began coursing through my veins when I seen who was standing in front of me. “Watch where you’re going, faggot.” Seth growled, his lips parting a little and revealing his white teeth. His hand on my arm tightened painfully, his dull fingernails digging into my flesh through the material of my hoodie.

“I-I’m sorry.” I squeaked out, trying to push his hand off of my arm but all that resulted in was him tightening his grip. I could feel as he curled his fingers and made his fingernails curl deeper into my skin, and finally, they broke through the skin. I whimpered loudly and started to struggle against his hold, my vision going in and out.

“You’re lucky I have to get to class, or i’d show you what little queers like you deserve.” With that, he shoved my back a little harder, then let go and walked down the hallway. I let out a deep breath and instead of sliding down to the ground like I had wanted to, I began to run to Jen’s room.

I had to guess which way I was going because tears were blurring my vision as they continued to slide down my cheeks. My left bicep was throbbing and I could feel as the blood began to seep into my shirt and hoodie. My head was throbbing too, from how hard I had hit it against the wall, but I pushed through the pain and focused on trying to get to Jen’s classroom.

I sprinted towards her door when I finally seen it, my backpack flying around. I burst through the open door and, once I was halfway in the room, I pressed my back against the wall and slide down it. I shoved my head between my knees and wrapped my arms tightly around my legs, violent sobs ripping through my body and making me shake uncontrollably.

I hated this school. I hated my life. I hated myself, I just hated everything. I felt someone touch my left arm gently, but their fingers skimmed over where Seth had grabbed me. I flinched away from their touch and scooted away from them, keeping the same position. “Louis,” Someone whispered softly, their voice calming me down just a little.

I didn’t answer them. My throat was closed off with emotions and even if I wanted to talk, I didn’t have anything to say. I sat on the floor for a few minutes, my body shaking even after I stopped crying. When my body finally stopped shaking, I loosened my grip on my legs and finally looked up, but in the opposite direction of where the person was still standing. I could only imagine what I looked like right now. My eyes were puffy and swollen, my bottom lip was trembling, and snot was running out of my nose.

I sniffled softly, and eventually, I looked over to see Jen kneeling beside me, worry plastered on her face. “Seth.” I mumbled when she went to speak. My throat was scratchy and my voice was thick from crying. I cleared my throat and looked behind Jen when something moved. Harry was standing behind her, his arms hanging at his sides but his fists were clenched. He had a very, very scary look on his face and his green eyes that were always bright, were now dark and stormy looking. I wondered why he was like that, but I just figured that he got more detention for doing something stupid.

“Stand up and let me see.” Jen said, her hand slipping under my armpit as she helped me into a standing position. I let her guide me over to the table I usually sat at. Without glancing at either of them, I sat down in the chair and tugged off my black, thin hoodie, revealing my red shirt that exposed some of my tattoos.

Before Jen could ask, I turned my arm over and glanced down at it. There was four dark patches in the arm of my shirt, which was where the blood had seeped through it. I began to carefully roll it up, hissing quietly under my breath when my fingers brushed over the four wounds. When my shirt was finally rolled up, I seen the four nail marks that were in my skin, as well as the blue bruise that was forming on my pale skin in the shape of a hand.

“Oh Louis.” Jen breathed out, reaching her hand forward like she was going to touch it, but she didn’t. She pulled her hand back and stood up, her tall figure disappearing from my sight when she walked behind me. I blew out a deep breath and chanced a glance up at Harry. The taller teens eyes were focused on my arm, his jaw moving back and forth as he grinded his teeth together, making a small noise that sent a shiver down my spine.

“Are you okay?” He asked after a few heartbeats passed by in silence. I looked back down at my arm and nodded, because I was okay now. My arm didn’t hurt too much anymore and now that I wasn’t crying, my head was no longer throbbing. I didn’t even know why I had cried as bad as I did. I was used to Seth and him bullying me, so I shouldn’t have reacted that way. The only logical explanation I could come up with was that I had gotten so used to not being bullied, that when he had attacked me this morning, I was shocked, which lead to me crying.

“Stop lying.” Harry growled, his voice sounding so threatening. I jumped at the noise and eyed him with wide eyes. He has never used that tone of voice with me, and I really didn’t want him to start. He was the only student here that was nice to me, and I honestly didn’t want to go back to being the loner who only talked to teachers.

“I’m not.” I felt my heart rate quicken when Harry pinned my eyes with his. I almost looked away from his eyes that were swimming with hatred, but I didn’t. That look may scare off a lot of people, but deep down, I knew Harry wouldn’t hurt me.

“You just cried like a fucking baby ten minutes ago, so do you honestly expect me to believe that you are okay.” I brushed off the name about being a baby, and merely shrugged my shoulders. He could believe what he wanted to, but I was okay. I would have a nasty ass bruise on my arm for a few weeks, but other than that, I would be fine.

“Unbelievable.” Harry eyed me for a second, like he was making sure I was okay. When he got the answer he wanted, he grabbed his bag off of the table next to me and stormed out of the room. I rolled my eyes at how childish he was being and glanced down at the table, my eyes landing on the white paper that had my name in big bold letters at the top.

I picked it up and read over it as I waited for Jen to get back from wherever she was. I had the same classes as last term, and they were even in the same order. I smiled softly because I knew Jen was the reason behind this. She knew I didn’t like change, so she would usually make it so I could earn the credits I was missing from the other classes, so I could keep the same classes all year.

I know how boring that must sound, but that’s how I preferred it. I set the paper back down on the table right as Jen walked in with a first aid kit. She stayed silent as she wiped the dried blood off of my arm with an alcohol wipe and put bandaids over each of the cuts. When she was done, she threw all the trash away and told me she had to go talk to the principle. She also told me not to bother waiting because classes started in a few minutes.

I nodded and stood up from my seat. I tugged my hoodie back on, being cautious of my arm, and picked up my backpack. I walked through the familiar hallways, my eyes scouring over them in search for the jock I didn’t want to see. I was just passing the front office when someone grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side of the hallway.

I closed my eyes and held my breath, waiting for Seth to punch me, but he never did. I cracked my left eye open, thankful that they weren’t as swollen before, and frowned when I seen Harry standing in front of me. He looked calmer than he had before, but he was shaking. I took a step forward and hesitated before I finally placed my hand on the side of his smooth cheek, sighing internally when he didn’t pull away or freak out because I was touching him. I wanted to rip my hand away when it felt like it had been lit on fire, but I pushed through the feeling and focused on Harry.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked, forcing him to look down at me. And so the sky met the grass, such a marvelous blue, and such a vibrant green. I was rendered speechless when I seen how many emotions were swimming through Harry’s eyes. He was upset, that was evident enough, but he also looked…. Caring?

“Come with me.” Harry said, and he sounded breathless. He reached a hand up and grabbed mine gently. He guided both of our hands down, never once breaking eye contact. And, without letting go of my hand once is was down, he laced his fingers with mine and pulled me out of the school and down the steps.

The cool air nipped at my skin, but I continued following Harry towards a black car. My shoes crunched in the snow with each step I took, and I was beginning to become breathless. I was practically running to keep up with Harry’s long strides, and I doubted that the older teen realized how fast he was walking. He was probably too focused on his thoughts to realize he was all but dragging me through the snow and towards his car.

Once we reached the car, he let go of my hand and I whined in protest, but it wasn’t loud enough for Harry to hear. His hand was the only thing keeping my body warm, due to the blazing fire that started when he touched me. I stood awkwardly at the front of the car and watched as he opened the passenger door. My breath was coming out in short puffs that created a cloud of fog around me.

“Get in.” Harry instructed, not looking over at me. I was going to protest and tell him that I didn’t want to miss school, especially on our first day back, but then I remembered what he looked like when we were inside the school and I quickly scurried over to the black impala that was the nicest car I had ever seen in my entire life. I slid down into the surprisingly comfortable leather seat, and ignored as the coldness began to seep through my pants and make my butt cold.

Harry slammed my door shut and walked around the front of the car. He opened the driver’s door and set down in the seat, his car keys already in his hand. He grabbed both mine and his backpacks and threw them in the backseat, growling under his breath when one of the straps whipped him in the face. I had to bit my lip to stifle my laugh, knowing that right now wasn’t the time.

I stayed silent, and still, in my seat as I waited patiently for Harry to start to car. Warm air flooded through the car when he did. I sighed happily and leaned forward, cupping my hands over the heater vent. My hands began to warm up, both of them no longer feeling as if they were going to fall off from how cold they were.

Harry’s tires squealed as he pulled out of the school’s parking lot rather quickly. I flew back in my seat and hit my arm against the window with a loud thud. It didn’t hurt too bad, but with the slick roads and Harry’s insane driving, I decided it was the best idea to put on my seatbelt. I buckled up my seat belt and looked out through the windshield. The white trees flew past us as Harry sped up the car even more. I wanted to tell him to slow down, but I didn’t want to upset him further so I stayed quiet.

By the time Harry stopped the car, I was shaking in my seat and clinging onto it with dear life. “You need to learn how to drive.” I said through chattering teeth. Harry laughed, the sound oddly soothing me, and climbed out of the car. He walked around to my side and opened the door, extending his hand for me to take so he could help me out of the car.

“You didn’t die, did you?” He asked, shoving his hand further into the car, silently telling me to grab it. I lifted up a shaky hand and slid it into Harry’s, yelping in surprise when he pulled me out of the car. I almost fell flat on my face, and I would have if the arm around my shoulders hadn’t been there.

Harry pulled me into a standing position and let go, though he kept one hand on my elbow as he guided me towards a park bench. My breath literally stopped when I took in the sight in front of me. There was a playground that was completely covered in snow, but that wasn’t what had me in awe. A little past the playground was a flat field that was surrounded by trees, their tree branches hanging low from all the weight of the snow. Icicles littered a few of the branched and twinkled in the morning sun.

It might seem like a normal sight to some people, but it wasn’t to me. I had never really got the chance to watch the sun pelt against the snow and watch as it glistens and shimmers. I haven’t been out much in the past few years, especially not to a park, but if everything looked like this, I definitely needed to come out more.

“If you think it’s pretty now, you should see it in the summer.” Harry said quietly from beside me. His hand, which was on my elbow, was now brushing against my hand. I ignored the shocks I was getting whenever he touched my hand, and looked back up at the field. I tried to imagine what it would look like during the summer, but my mind was a piece of shit and only popped up images of dead flowers and mud.

I shook my head and walked over to the bench, my feet occasionally sliding on the slippery ground. I used my sleeve to brush all the snow off of it, and when I got down to the icy part of the snow, I shrugged and set down. The ice instantly began to melt underneath my butt, but my butt became frozen as soon as I set down so I didn’t mind it too much.

Harry walked over a few minutes later and set down next to me. His shoulder brushed against mine, but I didn’t bother moving and neither did he. We sat in a peaceful silence for a few minutes, both of us just admiring the perfectly white snow that lied beneath our feet. Well, my feet, not his. His legs were long enough that he could reach the ground, and if I wanted mine to, I would have to scoot forward a little.

“What happened at the school?” I suddenly blurted, needing an answer to the question that has been running through my head since Harry had pulled me off to the side of the hallway. I peeked over at him, my insides melting when I seen the grin on Harry’s face.

“Nothing.” He simply answered, and when he glanced over at me and seen my face, he sighed and rolled his eyes. “I went to look for Seth, but he was with all of his bitches, and I didn’t want to get expelled from another school because I beat up the school’s football team.” He explained further, not sounding interested at all.

My stomach erupted in butterflies when I registered what Harry had said. He went to look for Seth to beat him up  _ /because/ _ of what Seth did to me. “Thank you.” I whispered, casting my gaze down to my knees. I noticed that my legs were shivering, but I wasn’t cold. I was happy. I had a stupid grin on my face, all because the school’s bad ass wanted to beat up the most popular kid in school because he had hurt me. I knew I should tell Harry not to fight because of me, but it was a new feeling to have someone willingly fight for me, and I just wanted to feel it for a few more minutes.

I noticed Harry gazing at me from the corner of my eye, so I slowly turned my head and returned to stare. “What?” I eventually asked, my voice quiet and timid. I couldn’t read Harry’s expression, which was odd because I could usually read people really well, but I could tell that he was surprised. Surprised by what? I had no idea, but i’m sure it has something to do with me being so calm or something.

“Nothing.” He almost instantly answered. He shook his head and leaned forward, propping his knees up on his elbows. I pursed my lips and nodded, being able to read him now. He looked solemn, and I was uncomfortable with the look. He was usually cheerful whenever I was around, so this new him was a little odd to me.

Neither of us speaking, mostly because I didn't know what to say, I leaned down and picked up a handful of snow. I lifted it up to eye level and stared at it for a second, watching intently as it glistened in the light. Cool water began to run between my fingers and down my arm, all of it collecting at the end of my hoodie sleeve. “I haven’t played in the snow for almost nine years.” I whispered, feeling to need to talk and the only topic that was on my mind was the snow.

I hear Harry gasp, for effect, before he turned in his seat and looked at me. His knee nudged against my thigh when he had moved, and it stayed pressed against the side of my thigh as he stayed looking at me. “You’re not joking.” He stated, sounding surprised by his own words. I shook my head and wanted to explain further, but I have never talked about my dad with anyone and I wasn’t going to any time soon.

“Well,” Dragging out the ‘l’ in well, Harry stood up and walked a few feet in front of us. “We need to change that.” He said as he bent down and picked up a handful of snow. I didn’t know what he meant, but when he turned around and I seen the dark smirk dancing on his lips, I knew exactly what he was about to do. I watched in slow motion as Harry pulled his arm back and threw the white ice ball at me. It pelted my shoulder and broke into a bunch of pieces, most of them splattering across my face.

I gasped loudly and gaped at Harry, not believing that he had just thrown a snowball at me. Huffing, I brushed the snow off of my shoulder and stood up, throwing the remainder of the snowball that was in my hand at Harry. It hit him in the stomach and stuck against his shirt, but I didn’t throw enough force for it to hurt. Harry growled playfully and lunged behind a large rock that was next to the border of the playground. I looked around frantically for somewhere to hide, and I finally decided to duck behind the bench.

The next half an hour passed by with me and Harry throwing snowballs at each other. It wasn’t until my fingers went completely numb and was to the point that I couldn’t bend them, that I called a truce with Harry. I walked out from behind the bench and cupped my hands over my lips. I blew on them, that being my lame attempt at trying to warm them, and whined when that only made things worse.

“My hand..” I didn’t get to finished my sentence because I was being pulled down into a mountain of snow. I had expected to land on something hard, but when my body fell into the snow, it felt no different than how it did when I used to jump on my parents pillow top mattress. Some of the powered snow, that covered the top of the rest of the snow, blew up in the air and twirled around me before it slowly fell back down to the earth.

“I was just about to tell you I was cold.” I whined, shoving my frozen hands into my equally cold pockets. I heard Harry mumble something, him apparently not wanting me to hear, before I was being hauled back to me feet. Out of curiosity, I glanced down at where I was lying and smiled when I seen my body was perfectly indented in the snow. I let my eyes float over to where Harry was lying, snorting quietly when I seen there was a snow angel.

“Mature.” I mumbled, elbowing Harry with my elbow. With one last glance at Harry’s long snow angel, I twirled around and began to walk towards Harry’s car. I heard his footsteps crunch in the snow as he began to run after me to catch up. By the time he did, I was already almost a few feet away from his car.

He unlocked the doors and I hurried and opened my door before Harry got a chance to. I sat down in the seat and folded my legs so they were up on the seat as well. I buckled my seat and sat forward, placing my hands over the heaters of the car and waiting impatiently for Harry to turn on the car. “I’m going to die of hypothermia.” I exclaimed when I noticed Harry was taking his sweet ass time. I may have been over exaggerating, but it honestly felt like I was going to die right now.

My entire body was frozen and I haven’t been able to feel my feet since we first got here. But, despite those things, I am having a lot of fun. I had never imagined myself having fun in the snow again, yet here I was, freezing my ass off after having a snowball fight with a seventeen year old. Wait, is he seventeen? Or sixteen. He is one of those two ages, unless he got held back.

“Thank you, Harry.” I mumbled once he turned on the car. He nodded his head and began to drive, obviously not catching onto how much meaning was behind those two simple words. I wasn’t thanking him for just turning on the heater, but I was thanking him for everything he has done. Since he has gotten here, my life has been far more interesting and fun than it has my entire teenage years. He has not only helped me get used to talking to people, but he has also reminded me that there is a lot more to life than school and home.

I may not know him that well, but he has showed me that you can live a good life even after having a shitty past. And just to think, he doesn’t know how much he really has done for me.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. Chapter 10

I was still shivering by the time Harry pulled into a parking lot to a... cafe? I peered out the window to look for a sign, but we were on the side of it so I couldn’t see anything other than the red paint that covered the walls. Bushes were growing along the side of the building and were covering half of the wall, and they were covered in snow.

“Why did you stop here?” I asked when I managed to get my teeth to stop chattering. My hands were no longer frozen solid, and I had feeling back in my toes, but now that my body was thawing out, I could feel how uncomfortable my wet my clothes were from when I had sat down on the bench and laid in the snow. 

Harry, without answering me, climbed out of the car and walked around to my side. He opened my door and took a step to the side, allowing me more room to get out. I sighed in defeat and climbed out of the car, managing to keep my balance even on the slippery ice that covered half of the parking lot. 

The cold air wrapped around my body and embraced me in a cold embrace. I shivered, as if it were instinct, and wrapped my arms tightly around my waist. I followed closely behind Harry as he began to walk towards the door, his strides anything but graceful. Every few steps he took, he would slip and almost fall, but he managed to regain his balance, after cursing, and continue forward.

“Are you going to tell me why we’re here?” I questioned, having to almost shout because he was so far in front of me. He slowed down his pace and came to a complete stop when he remembered I was with him. I sighed in relief, fog clouding my head, and jogged to catch up to him.

“I wanted a cup of cocoa.” He said, like it was the most obvious thing ever, and shrugged. I rolled my eyes, but my stomach grumbled at the mention of hot cocoa. I haven’t had it in years and it sounded amazing right now, but I wouldn’t be able to get one because there was a small problem…. I didn’t have any money.

I kept quiet and bowed my head as we walked through the front door, Harry holding it open of course. I didn’t bother looking at where he was going, because I was too focused on finding a seat so I could cover up my ass that was completely wet, and very noticeable. I lifted my head up a little and looked around the small cafe, spotting the perfect booth in the back corner.

I sighed in relief and walked over to it. I sat down, the plastic black thing that covered the seat making a weird noise. I bit my lip and glanced around, wanting to make sure that nobody had noticed the noise. There was only a few people here, though, and none of them were close to where I was sitting.

At the other end of the cafe, there was an elderly couple and behind them there was a sad looking woman who was twirling her cup on the table. On the other side of the counter there was an elderly woman with a younger child, and standing in front of the counter with a brown wallet in hand was Harry.

His long legs were crossed over each other as he stood in line. His black skinny jeans were wet and his blue shirt was clinging to his body, showing off a few of the tattoos that were littered across his torso and arms. I had noticed a tattoo on his stomach, that was very noticeable, but I didn’t know what it was and I didn’t want to ask him what it was. His long hair, which he would run his fingers through every now and again, was still slightly damp and hung in loose curls around his head.

I shook my head and blew out a deep, quiet breath. I looked down at the table and picked up a sugar packet from the small basket in the middle of the table. The writing was too small for me to see, my contacts being at home along with my glasses. I was in too big of a rush this morning to even bother grabbing either one of them, so I was practically blind today when it came to things that were far away from me. I mean, I could see blobs and if I squinted, I could make out a few things, but I didn’t even bother squinting to read something as stupid as a sugar packet.

I pulled open the top of it and was getting ready to dump it on the table when someone sat across from me. I jumped a little, and watched as some of the grains of sugar flew out of the packet and landed on the table, a few of them sliding and landing on the space next to me. “Jesus.” I whispered, my heartbeat accelerating, and carefully sat the packet down on the table, propping it up against the basket so no more got spilled.

“I ordered you a hot cocoa.” Harry informed me, smiling smugly. I inhaled sharply and dug my fingernails into the palm of my hand. I hated when people bought me something, which was rare, because it made me feel like shit.

“You didn’t have to.” I said quietly, looking down at my hands to avoid his gaze. I was embarrassed, to say the least. I couldn’t even say that I could pay him back because I didn’t have money, and I didn’t have a job. I really needed one, though. But I had to wait at least another month before I could get one unless the place I applied at didn’t require a drug test.

“Oh shut it and just accept the cocoa.” His tone of voice wasn’t rude like I had expected it to be, he sounded calm and maybe a little irritated. I shook my head quickly and slipped my bottom lip between my teeth, clasping my teeth around it. I hated being in public places like this, especially with how I looked right now. My clothes were wet and soggy, my eyes and nose were red from the chilly weather and my hair was wet. If I didn’t at least attempt to dry it soon, it would go limp and look like shit.

Pushing my thoughts aside, I closed my eyes and focused on Harry’s breathing. It was steady and he was breathing through his nose, but if you listened closely, you could hear how he would breath faster every time I would flinch or move. I didn’t know why it happened, though, all I knew is that is was happening.

A few minutes later I felt my arm being nudged to the side as a tray was being set down on the table. I looked up and eyed the black haired woman with clumpy mascara and red lipstick. She was wearing a striped dress with a white apron on and there was a small, white name tag on the corner of her right boob.

“Thank you,” Pausing, Harry smirked over at me before he looked at the woman’s name tag. “Isabelle.” His tongue curled as he said her name, and it made it sound a lot more seductive then I was comfortable with. I shifted in my seat and tried to ignore the bubble of jealousy I got when I seen how he was staring at her.

Wait, what? Jealousy? Why the hell was I jealous? I had no right to be. I mean, Harry had been nice to me and all but that was it. There wasn’t really any reason that I should be jealous. Besides, I didn’t even know if Harry was gay and based on the way he was currently flirting with the waitress, he was anything but gay.

I pushed down the urge to rip out her hair extentions, and slumped down in my seat, frowning deeply. I grabbed one of the two brown cups off of the tray that was overflowing with marshmallows. There was something red sprinkled over the top of the marshmallows, and there was grated chocolate over them, but what was odd to me was the stick that was sticking out of it. 

It was light brown and had brown swirls around it. It looked like a straw to me, but at the same time it didn’t. I closed my left eye and squinted so I could look down the straw thing. There was chocolate lining the inside of it and based on the smell, it was some type of graham cracker like thing.

I lifted to cup up to my lips and took a cautious sip. My taste buds exploded when I not only got the flavor from the hot chocolate and marshmallows, but there was also a hint of cinnamon. My eyes lit up and I eagerly took another sip, the warm liquid sliding down my throat and coating it before it landed in the pit of my stomach, warming me from the inside out. I hummed in appreciation and looked up at Harry, who was now watching me, the waitress no longer being anywhere in sight.

“Where’s Isabelle?” I asked, using a lot more venom when I said her name than I had intended. Harry raised an eyebrow at me and laced his fingers together, using them to rest his chin on as he leaned forward and propped his elbows up on the table.

“Oh, you mean this Isabelle?” He asked, lifting up his phone long enough that I seen a picture of her smiling, red lipstick staining her teeth. Her name was saved under Bell and just underneath her name there was a number. I rolled my eyes, more jealousy fueling my body, and lifted the cup back up to my lips.

Lifting up one of his hands, Harry tilted the screen towards him a little and clicked the little garbage can next to the call button. A small white screen appeared that said something along the lines of ‘Are you sure you want to delete this contact.’ Smiling, Harry clicked yes and the screen did a loading sign before it went back to his contact screen.

“Wasn’t my type.” Harry said when I looked at him questioningly. He smiled at me, like he was enjoying some kind of inside joke, and grabbed his own cup. He took a sip of it before he wrapped his lips around the stick thing and bit down on it. It crunched loudly as he chewed, but the way his eyes were shining, I doubted he cared.

I licked my bottom lip and mirrored Harry, taking a bit of the stick. I found out it wasn’t a graham cracker, but it was some kind of cracker. The chocolate that was coating the inside of the stick was now melted from the steam, and it coated my tongue as I chewed. “Oh my god.” I moaned, my head tilting back a little as I finished chewing the rest of the stick thing.

A cup falling down on the table brought me out of my little heaven. I looked down just in time to see the warm liquid from Harry’s cup splashing all over the front of him and the table. I laughed loudly and sat my cup down before I quickly scooted out of my seat. I used my sleeve to wipe of Harry’s face, then I turned my direction down to the table. I picked up the cup, that was surprisingly not broke, and set it down next to mine. I grabbed a handful of napkins out of the little tin thing that was next to the basket on the table.

The moment I laid the napkins down on the hot cocoa, they turned brown and became soggy. I groaned loudly and did my best to wipe up as much of the brown liquid and I could. Harry, who had pushed past me to go to god knows where, pushed me out of the way gently and began to mop up the remaining mess with a hand towel.

It took him only a few seconds before he managed to clean all of it up. He took the towel back up to the woman standing behind the counter and turned back around to walk towards me. His blue shirt was no longer blue on the front. It was now dark brown from where the hot cocoa had splattered up it. I bit my tongue to keep from laughing and picked Harry’s phone up off the table and met him halfway.

“Let’s go.” He growled in my ear, ripping the phone out of my hand and sliding it into the pocket of my hoodie, where my phone was. I nodded my head and followed after him as he waddled to his car. As soon as we reached his black impala, he undid the button to his pants and pulled them down. I felt my stomach grow tight as I watched him strip from his pants, leaving him in nothing but his grey boxers that clung to his body in the most perfect way ever.

His ass, which was small, was showed off perfectly in his wet boxers. I swallowed thickly and ripped my gaze away from his ass. I chewed on my bottom lip and walked to my side of the car and carefully sat down in the seat. I closed the door once I was sitting down and looked up just as Harry was sitting down. He threw his pants in the back seat and began rubbing his red thighs. 

I hissed softly and looked at the red, angry looking skin. Harry looked at me for a second, his green eyes unreadable. “You and your fucking moan did this.” He growled and gestured to his chest and lap. 

“My moan?” How did my moan cause this? When did I even moan? Oh, when I took a bite of the weird stick thing that was in my drink. My mouth fell open when I recalled that Harry had infact dropped his cup right after I emitted that ungodly sound. But, why did my moan cause that? What did I even sound like when I moaned. I went to make the sound, being lost in thought, but quickly closed my mouth when I remembered I was in the car with Harry.

“Yeah. Bloody sound made me hard.” He growled, his eyes going down to his crotch that was now soft. I tried to imagine what Harry would look like with a hard on, but as the image slipped into my mind, I felt my cheeks heat up and my own dick grow slightly hard.

I cleared my throat and shifted in my seat, ringing my hands in my lap and I tried to focus on anything other than the half naked male that was next to me. All coherent thoughts left my mind and my throat went dry when my mind betrayed me and different sceneries of Harry naked and standing in front of me began to flash through my mind. 

I tightened my grip on my seat and shifted so I was facing towards the window, my back facing Harry. I reached up with shaky hands and put on my seatbelt, a small voice in the back of my mind, that was barely heard above Harry’s moans that were ricocheting around in my mind, reminded me that Harry was completely insane when he drove and that I needed to put on my seatbelt.

If Harry had talked to me as he drove me to god knows where, then I didn’t hear him. I stared out the window absentmindedly and drew small patterns in the fog on the window that would appear with each breath I took. My forehead was resting against the cool window and my knee was pressing against the door. It was uncomfortable, but not completely unbearable. 

The thought of having to turn around and face Harry made my stomach churn painfully and my palms sweat. Somewhere on the ride home I had came to a very unwelcomed realization. I had a small, most definitely small, crush on the pantless boy next to me. In the short time that I have known him, I have learned that he is crude, blunt and just an overall asshole, but deep down, I knew that there was a part of him that cared. And even if he didn’t want anyone to see it, I have witnessed that side of him on more occasions than one. 

That small part of him shines through all the bullshit that surrounds him and I think that that is what I had started to fall for. Not the danger of hanging out with the school’s bad ass, but the feeling of actually being cared for and wanted. Harry may be a lot of things in people’s eyes, but to me, he was the guy who was going to beat up my bully for /me/, and that alone had my heart racing like I had just got done running… I don’t run for exercise, so how about I say…. Icecream truck? Yeah, that alone had my heart racing like I had just got done running after the icecream truck.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't that good and I apologize. I just wanted to hurry and write a filler chapter before we get down to the good stuff. But I promise all of you that next chapter will be much more interesting!! :)

It’s been a few days since I have come to the unsettling realization that I, Louis Tomlinson, have my very first crush on the one and only Harry Styles. It wasn’t that bad, considering how nice Harry is to me, but what if this little friendship was just his way of proving himself to the school jocks? But then again, he beat up Seth so I highly doubt that my worries are true.

Sniffling quietly, I shook my head and returned to the task at hand. I was supposed to be taking down the Christmas decorations, that being my punishment for skipping school. Harry, who was none to happy about it, got bathroom duty. He had to scrub the toilets, clean the stalls, scrub the sinks and mop the floor, plus put more toilet paper and paper towels in their containers. 

I would much rather that job, honestly. I looked like a complete moron stretching up on my tippy toes to reach for the stupid holiday decorations. Harry would be able to reach them with no problem, but me? Nope. I was to fucking short to do anything without having to step up on something to give me that little extra boost. Damn me and my unwanted shortness.

Growling, the noise quiet and not at all threatening, I climbed up onto the bench that was next to the Christmas tree and pressed against the wall. I leaned forward and began to take off the ornaments one by one, ignoring one of the branches from the tree that continued to poke my stomach. They were plastic, so instead of getting down and putting them in the box, I just threw them down into the brown cardboard box. I continued this until the tree was completely bare, along with the hallway it was in and the rest of the hallways, which I have cleared throughout the day.

I smiled in satisfaction and climbed down from off the bench. With all the strength I had, I bent down up picked up the ridiculously heavy box and put it onto the cart. I knew I should have done it before hand, but the idea didn’t click to me until after I had already put all the decorations in it. Shaking my head, I wiped away the small layer of sweat that coated my forehead and began to push the cart across the hallway and towards the front office.

I glanced across the hallway and smiled. Only a few feet away from me was where Harry had pulled me to the side of the hallway, then made me follow him outside. I was so lost in thought that I didn’t see that wall I was about to run into, until I did. My stomach hit into the bar on the cart and the box shuffled forward a little, but didn’t fall off. I whined and used one hand to steer the cart and used the other to rub my stomach.

“Stupid shit.” I mumbled, pushing the cart through the opened door. I looked up to ask them where they wanted the cart, but nobody was behind the desk. I internally shrugged and pushed the cart further into the room, then turned left down the hallway. I took a few steps and stopped when I reached the door that they used for storage. 

I inhaled deeply and held my breath as I pushed open the large door. I maneuvered the cart into the room, having a little bit of difficulty, and blew out my deep breath. I left the cart by the wall and quickly left the room. Not many students were allowed in there, but I was one of the few that were. They allowed me to go in all the restricted areas in this school that was only for teachers, but I rarely did. It made me feel uncomfortable and like I was invading their privacy.

Whistling under my breath, I walked through the door and grabbed my backpack from by the tree. There was no way in hell I was going to even attempt to take down the Christmas tree without someone’s help. With my luck, the tree would fall over on top of me and i’d suffocate before anyone even realized I was under there, or gone for that matter.

I brushed past the other office aid, who I believes name is Taylor, and continue my way down the hallway. I had no idea where I was walking to until I found myself standing in front of the boy’s bathroom. Rolling my eyes, I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled it before I pushed the door open. My nostrils were instantly attacked with the smell of urine, stinky feet, and another odor that I had no idea what it was. 

I pushed past the ungodly stench and walked into the room, having to step over a soggy piece of toilet paper and a puddle of urine that was next to the urinals that were placed next to the door. I scrunched my nose up in disgust and carefully made my way to the stalls that were placed against the back wall. The first few were empty and just as I was about to open the last one, I heard someone complaining.

“Stupid pricks. I bet that half of them aren’t even able to aim for a vagina hole.” A deep, raspy voice mumbled. I bit down on my lip to stifle my laughter and quietly pushed open the stall door. Harry was on his hands and knees, his feet going underneath the stall wall and into the other one, and he was bent over the toilet. 

Damn, that’s a sight I could never get used to.

I shook off the thought and looked back down at Harry. His hair was tied up in a bun and he had yellow gloves on that came to his elbows, but what finally had me bursting into a fit of laughter was when I seen how frustrated he looked as he scrubbed the toilet, his eyes only being visible due to the white mask that covers half of his face. 

At the noise, Harry snapped his head in my direction and the toilet brush he was holding fell into the toilet and made water splash up, it barely missing Harry. Growling, Harry climbed up into a standing position and looked over at me, his already dark eyes going an even darker shade of emerald. He stalked forward and went to grab my wrist but I took a step back and held up a hand, my laughter subsiding.

“No, you’re dirty.” I said and scrunched up my nose again. I didn’t even use the bathrooms here, so he was lucky I was even standing in one right now. Harry huffed deeply and grabbed my wrist anyway and pulled me out of the stall. He continued pulling me forward, my feet practically dragging along the disgusting bathroom floor. I just went along with him, my eyes roaming over the empty hallways as we went in the opposite direction of the office. It didn’t take me too long to figure out that he was dragging me towards Jen’s classroom, and I knew it was because he was trying to get out of cleaning the last bathroom.

I hummed to myself and tried to distract myself with the different posters along the walls. My skin was a blazing fire where Harry was touching me and I feared that if I payed too much attention to it, that I would end up moving my hand and make Harry let go of my wrist. “How has your day been?” I asked him, trying to start up a conversation to break the uncomfortable silence that surrounded us.

“Shitty. I had old fucking granny hands when I cleaned the sinks, and some of the air headed jocks thought it would be funny to piss on the floor and throw toilet paper on the ground.” At the mention of his day, Harry’s eyes went cloudy and his pupils dilated. His face fell into a neutral one and his hand on my wrist loosened a little, but he didn’t let go completely. 

“Why didn’t you do anything about it?” I hesitated before asking. Harry slowed down his pace before he stopped completely and turned to look down at me, his hand finally letting go and falling down to his side. He stared at me for a second, his green eyes scrutinizing me and making me feel a slight bit self conscious.

“I broke one of their fingers and said if he told, i’d send out the dick picture I supposedly took while he was pissing.” He finally said after a few minutes of oddly comfortable silence. Holding up his hand, he showed me how big the jocks penis was with his two fingers. I laughed and shook my head.

“You’re a pervert.”

“Oh, but perverts are the funnest in beds.” I snorted loudly and began to walk down the hallway again, pretending I didn’t hear Harry yelling for me to stop. I wasn’t innocent, that’s for sure, but sometimes his dirty comments go straight to places I don’t want them to go when I am at school. 

I went to turn the corner, but a hand on my shoulder was pulling me back and shoving me against the locker. My breath got knocked out of my lungs at the impact, but it wasn’t as hard as it was when Seth did it. I peeked up at Harry from underneath my eyelashes, my bottom lip slipping between my teeth when I seen how intense his gaze was.

My heartbeat quickened when he lifted his hand up to my face and pressed it flat against my cheek. His fingers were long enough that he was able to thread the tips of his fingers through my hair at the back of my neck, making goosebumps a rise on my skin. I had expected him to do something, anything, really. But he didn’t. He just sat there and stared at me for some unknown reason before he sighed.

“You always walk away from me when i’m talking to you.” He whispered, bowing his head and honestly sounding like an upset child whose friend just told them they didn’t want to play with them anymore. I slowly blew out a deep breath and bent down a little, Harry’s hand staying firmly on my shoulder, and locked my eyes with his. I didn’t want him thinking that I wasn’t talking to him because I didn’t like him, because that wasn’t the case at all. I just really didn’t talk to too much people so I never really know what to say.

“I’m sorry, I just don’t really do well with face to face conversations. After a while of not really talking to anyone, a person loses their ability to socialize.” Harry’s eyes flared with anger before he calmed down and sighed. Slowly, he lifted up his head and once again locked his eyes with mine, a smirk tugging at his lips, the sight becoming all too familiar to me.

“Give me your number.” He said and before I could even reach into my pocket to grab my iphone, Harry already had it in his large hands. He took a step back from me, making me sigh in relief, and lifted the phone up like he was taking a selfie. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from groaning when Harry stuck his long tongue out, closed one of his eyes and tilted his head to the side, looking absolutely stunning even though he was holding up his middle finger.

There was the shutter sound that echoed throughout the small hallway, signaling that he had taken the photo. He looked at the phone and shrugged, apparently liking the photo he took, and typed something into the phone before his phone went off. He grinned widely and gave me my phone back, then reached into his pocket to retrieve his. 

My eyebrows furrowed as I scrolled down to the H’s in my contacts, but Harry’s name wasn’t there. I scrolled through the rest and was getting ready to ask Harry what he saved his name in on my phone when something flashed across from me. My eyes widened and I looked up at Harry, seeing he was holding his phone up. Before I had time to react, another picture was being taken of me. 

Quickly I bowed my head and hid most of my face in my hoodie. “Stop! I hate pictures.” I whined, burying my chin further into my hoodie. I wanted to walk forward and take the phone from Harry, but we all know that that will end horribly, or possibly embarrassing, for me. I absolutely hated pictures, even for the school yearbook. I always skipped getting my photos so I didn’t have to worry about my picture getting destroyed in every single yearbook, like it did my first year in junior high. 

“Fine, but i’m keeping these photos.” He said, and I didn’t even both arguing with him. 

/Whatever, let him keep the shitty ass photos of me./

I frowned and kept my chin buried in my hoodie as I continued scrolling through my contacts, a name in the b section finally catching my attention. “Booty call?” I read aloud, my cheeks heating up. Booty call? Why would he save his name under booty call? I looked up at him and seen he was now sitting down, pressing his back against the lockers, and he was playing with his phone.

“Why did you save your name under Booty call?” I asked and walked over to sit down by him. I pressed my back against the locker and slowly sat down, crossing my legs over one another so I mirrored Harry. His legs were longer than mine, so they stretched further than mine, but the bottom of my foot reached where his ankles were, so they weren’t much longer.

“Because, if you ever need me, i’m only one call away. Kinda like a booty call.” He explained, only half of his attention being on the topic. He was focused on his screen, his long thumbs tapping away on the screen. I leaned over a little and rolled my eyes when I seen he was playing the stupid ‘Don’t tap the white tile.’ game. 

It wasn't until I went to respond that I realized what Harry had said. He just told me he was always there for me and that he was only one call away. My heart felt like it was on the verge of exploding. Nobody has ever told me that they were always here for me, and even though it was in one of Harry's crude ways, it was still very sweet. To me it was, at least.

“Thank you, Harry.” And if all of my other ‘thank you’s’ weren't sincere enough, I was hoping this one was. I meant this one from the bottom of my heart, because I am honestly thankful that I was lucky enough to have one of the rudest, dirtiest, hottest, yet most caring person I have ever met, stumble into my life.


	12. Chapter 12

Harry and I have texted nonstop for the past month. We talk about anything and everything, really. We can go from having a conversation about Harry’s life, to what we think about the universe and how we feel about the possibility of there being different worlds where our lives turned out totally different then it was now. He had asked me one day what I would change if I could change anything about my past, and I answered him truthfully by saying I would stop my mother from having me. He had went silent for a few hours, but he text me back after a while and we started talking about a totally different subject.

I don’t know if it’s possible, but I feel closer to him than I have felt with anyone in a long time. I don’t know why, but he just makes me smile like an idiot whenever he texts me, including in classes. Never before have I ever took my phone out during class, because I thought it was disrespectful, but I have found I was willing to risk a lot just to be able to talk to the brown haired boy who talks about my ass every chance that he gets. I have stopped blushing as much whenever he talks about something sexual, and we’ve been having a lot more face to face conversations, but nothing too big.

“Would you put your phone down at look at me?” The brown haired woman said from across from me, pulling me out of my thoughts. I sighed and reluctantly put my phone down on the table and crossed my arms over my chest, turning my face up so I could see my mother.

She was wearing a brown shirt that was huge on her thin body, and the grey stained pants were hanging loosely around her waist, moving down a little further with each move she made. Her brown, thin hair with grey streaks was pulled up into a tight ponytail, but her hair still reached the middle of her back, and her bony arms were crossed over her chest as she stared at me with a look of disappointment, but I have done nothing to disappoint her.

“Yes mother?” I tried to keep my voice calm and polite, unlike the way I was on the inside. My insides were churning with anger and my entire body was completely stiff in my seat.

She sighed and sat down across from, her small body easily slotting into the limited space there was between the chair and wall. “We need money, Boo Bear, and I need your help.”

She folds her arms on top of the table and I stare at her bones that are visible through her thin skin that stretches over every bone in her body. It’s just proof of the drugs she has gotten into, and continues to use. Her once young face was now sunken in and most of her teeth were rotted, but we didn’t have the money to get her into a dentist.

We didn’t have money for anything, and that’s why I should have known what she was going to talk to me about. Just this morning she was bitching at both me and Lottie because we were almost out of groceries, but I don’t eat much so I don’t understand why I was the one getting bitched at or talked to about bringing in money. Lottie was just as capable as me to go out and get a job, and she was older than me for christ sakes. She would have better luck at finding a job than me.

“I’m guessing you have an idea of what you want me to do?” I ask when I finally feel like talking. I leaned back in my chair and sighed, rubbing the palm of my hand over my tired face. I was already tired of talking to her and we have only said a few things, and knowing my mom, her ideal job for me was probably ridiculous.

“I know how you feel about this, but we really need the money,” Pausing, she stared directly at me with her blank brown eyes. When she realized that I wasn’t going to say anything, she continued. “I need you to start selling my pills and things.”

_ She’s kidding, right? _

I look up at her and seen that she looked more serious than she ever has, but that can’t be it, right? She wasn’t really going to have me, her only son and youngest child, dive head first into the drug world just so we can have things around the house, right?

“You’re not kidding.” I breath out, my heart rate picking up speed but it didn’t feel like it did when I was around Harry. It was out of fear, rather than… Excitement?

“No Lou, we really need the money and I just got my pills.” She leans across the table and goes to grab my arm, but I jerk back and stand up, the old, worn out chair falling and clattering against the stained, cracked tile.

“I will not be your drug mule.” I growl through clenched teeth.

I may be short, but my mother was shorter than me, so when she stood up, I was staring down at her through slitted eyes. My teeth were clenched together and my body was rigid, and for the first time in my life, I was absolutely angry. I could feel the anger as it started to uncoil in my stomach and spread throughout my veins, like a rapidly spreading fire.

My mum tried to mirror me, but her body was too weak and she was only able to hold eye contact with me. Blazing blue eyes locking with unreadable Brown eyes. “You will if you want to continue talking to that little boyfriend of yours.” She spat out, and before I could grab my phone, she already had it clenched tightly in her fist.

_ Harry _

At the mere mention of him, I felt my body relax a little and the anger start to die down. How did she know about him? Has she been stalking me? Why didn't I deny the fact that he was my boyfriend? “How do you know about him?” I asked, and I tried to make myself sound as angry as I did before, but I felt myself giving up. I was just starting to get comfortable with someone, and I wasn’t going to let something as stupid as my own life get in the way of it.

Rolling her eyes, she shoved the phone at my chest and I had enough time to reach up before she let go. “Oh please. A mother knows when her child is in love.”

_ In love? What is she talking about. I have only known Harry for about three months, and I only had a small crush on him. Crazy woman must be high out of her mind. _

But that’s the thing. She wasn’t. She was way too coherent right now to be even the slightest bit high. When she was, she was a stumbling mess who stuttered, got extremely violent and fell asleep wherever she could, including on the toilet. There was no way she would be as civilized as she was right now if she wasn’t all there.

“I-I’m not in love with him. He's just a friend.” I was stuttering, and both me and my mom knew that I stuttered when I was nervous, or trying to cover up something.

Wait, what the hell? How did a conversation about me being my mother’s drug mule turn into a conversation about who I did and did not have a crush on. Before my mother could say anything, I grabbed my shitty headphones off the table and slipped them into my pocket. “I’ll do it.” I say loud enough for her to hear as I walk out of the kitchen and towards the stairs. I take two at a time, being all too eager to get to my room where I could lock the door and finally have silence.

“Thank you, baby.” I hear her yell exactly at the same time I was closing my bedroom door. I rolled my eyes, something I have found myself doing a lot lately, and locked my door before I flopped down on my bed. The springs came to life and I bounced for a few seconds, then finally settled down into the mattress that some would say was uncomfortable, but I have grew to love.

I clicked the power button on my phone and was shocked to not only see no new messages from Harry, but that it was past eleven at night. I set my phone down on my stomach and peered out my open window. It was infact dark, the light no longer shining through the window and providing light for me.

I groaned, knowing I should go to bed, and pulled myself into a sitting position. I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened between me and my mom as I stripped from my clothes, leaving only my boxers on. Why did she think I was in love with him? Was it because of the way I smiled when he texted me? Knowing how my mom interprets things, that’s probably why she thinks I am in love with him.

Laughing under my breath and shaking my head, I plugged my phone into my charger, took out my contacts and put them in the case, then flicked off the light. I climbed back into my bed and pulled the thin, scratchy blanket up and over my body. I really didn’t need it at night, because I was always hot, but it gave me a sense of comfort.

I rolled onto my side and buried my head into my flat pillow. It took forever for my mind the finally shut down and allow me to sleep, but finally after an hour and a half, I slowly slipped into a state of blissful unconsciousness, the last thought ringing through my mind being my mother’s words.

_ ‘A mother knows when her child is in love.’ _

**_~~~~~~~~_ **

I got up the next morning at around noon. I had slept in, which was odd for me. I was always up before the sun was fully up, but not today. Instead of getting dressed in my normal clothes, I threw on a pair of red skinny jeans and a simple black loose fitting t-shirt that drowned me. I had to go run and do the job my mom requested me to do, then I have to walk to the store and get groceries for the bloody house, because we don’t have a car.

The sun was barely shining through the thick, grey clouds when I walked out of my front door. I had my phone in my hand, and my mom’s pills tucked safely in my pants pocket along with my headphones. The walk to the familiar house wasn’t too long, it usually only took me only a few minutes and I had kept my head down the entire time. I didn’t exactly live in one of the safest neighborhoods, and if you were caught looking around when you walked, they would think you were a cop or some shit and you would either get jumped, or shot.

You may not believe it, but it happened to one of the people’s kids that moved in like, two years ago. Their son, who was about eighteen, got curious and decided to take a little walk around our neighborhood. I guess he was acting all weird and looking through people’s windows, so some of the people got jumpy and ended up shooting him four times, I think. They were never able to find the killer, but they really didn’t give two shits either.

I sighed at the memory of what the parents looked like when they got the news, and I shook my head to rid myself of the images. It was a horrible time, but if I didn’t stay focused, I would most likely get killed to. When I finally did glance up, I seen the old, rotting house just a few feet away from me.

I blew out a deep breath and quickened my pace. When I reached the house, I walked around the side of it instead of knocking on the door. The first thing you should know about doing stuff like this, is you never let the person’s family you’re selling the pills to, know you are there, or it always end in trouble.

The moment I walked around the house I could already smell the heavy stench of alcohol. Sitting at a table was one of my mom’s old friends that she has known for years, and trusts with her life. Beer cans littered the lawn and were scattered on the table and on the ground around the table, there being over a hundred.

I tried to be quiet when I walked up to her, but I somehow managed to kick one of the beer cans. “Don’t move, dick.” Sara growled as she jumped up from her seat. She twirled around and held a small black thing in her hand, that I didn’t realize was a gun until she pushed a button that I believe was the safety.

“I-It’s m-me Sar-ra” I stuttered out, not even caring how stupid I sounded. You usually don’t when there is a gun only a few inches in front of you that is pointed directly at your chest.

Smiling, and revealing her gums, Sara threw the gun down on the table and lunged at me. She wrapped her thick arms around me and squoze me hard, making it impossible for me to even breath. I felt myself being lifted up in the air for a second before I was being set back down, and thank god it was right then too because I felt the vomit start to build up my throat.

I swallowed thickly and laughed shakily, trying to act like I wasn’t at all affected by the fact I just had the life scared, and squished out of me. “How are you, Sky?” I cringed when she said the nickname she gave me when I was ten years old. It was a warm summer day and my mom came over to get high, of course, while me and Lottie were playing.

Well, after they were done they both came outside and Sara managed to forget my name, so she gave me the nickname Sky because my eyes reminded her of the bright blue Sky. I didn’t necessarily hate the name, I just hated the fact that it was a girl’s name.

“I’m fine! I just came here for my mum.” I said when I finally managed to remember how to breath. I instantly regretted it when I took a deep breath through my nose, and smelt nothing but stale cigarette smoke, stale beer, and b.o.

Sara didn’t say much after that. She just handed me the three hundred dollars for the pills I gave her, then I went on my way. I shoved the wade of cash in my pocket and bowed my head again, soon becoming entrapped in my own thoughts.

Harry hasn’t texted me since last night and I was honestly upset about it. Did I do something wrong? No, I didn’t think I did. The last thing I texted him was ‘k’, and I don’t even remember what he had texted me. I was too lazy to put the password into my phone just to see what Harry had said. Besides, I didn’t want to seem too desperate and like I was a little girl obsessed over a boy and goes crazy if he doesn’t respond right away.

I bit my lip and stepped over a large crack in the middle of the sidewalk. My head suddenly snapped up when I felt something pelt against the back of my neck, the cool liquid splashing against my neck and running down my back. I looked up at the sky and got pelted right in the eye by another large drop of rain.

I groaned loudly and shoved my phone into my pocket before folding my arms over my head, trying to shield myself from the rain as best as I could. The store was only about another three blocks from where I was from, so I didn’t have to walk to long in the rain. As if to say  ‘joke’s on you’ the rain began to fall down faster, and harder. It pelted against my body, and I honestly wished I would have brang my hoodie.

I squinted my eyes and looked through the thick layers of rain, spotting a bus stop only a few feet in front of me. I ran as fast as I could and took shelter underneath the small, yet protective, bus stop thing. I read the sign and groaned when I seen that the bus didn’t run on sundays. I set down on the bench and leaned back against the metal seat, my sopping wet shirt sticking to it.

I ran my hand through my hair and stared out at the rain. It was coming down fast and looked almost like a blanket was hiding the other side of the road from me. I sat there for a few minutes, to see if the rain would slow down, but it only got worse.

I shivered in my seat, my body freezing, and pulled out my phone. I unlocked the screen and debated on who I should call. I couldn’t call my mom, because she didn’t have a car to come get me in, and I didn’t really know anybody else that lived close to us that actually had a car.

_ Yes, you do. He’s your booty call. _

I licked my lips and sighed, realizing I had no other choice. I scrolled down the the B’s in my contacts and hesitated a little before I finally clicked down on the ridiculous name. I lifted the phone up to my ear, but kept it an inch away so I didn’t get it wet. It rang for a few minutes before the line clicked.

“Hello?” He asked. His voice was groggy and thick, being heavy with sleep. I stifled my groan and paused for a second before I sighed deeply.

“I woke you up, nevermind.” I said, then pulled the phone down. My thumb was hovering over the red button that would end the call, but then I remembered what Harry told me. He said he prefered if I just got straight to the point and told him what was on my mind, rather than being too upset, shy or embarrassed to say anything.

“Actually, you did say you were there for me whenever and I kinda need your help right now.” I hated asking for help, but I knew Harry wouldn’t judge me or ask any questions. I may not have known him that long, but I could tell he actually cared about me, even if it was only a little bit.

I heard shuffling on the other end, then a loud crash and Harry cursing loudly after. “I’ll be there, just text me the address.” And with that, the line went dead. I bit my lip harshly to try and hide my grin that was starting to stretch my lips. He didn’t say no, and he didn’t ask why I needed him. He, despite me just waking him up, was coming to my rescue.

**_~~~~~_ **

“Why didn’t you wear a fucking coat!?!” Was the first thing I heard when Harry pulled up infront of the bus stop. His voice had startled me, because I hadn’t heard the smooth purr of his engine due to the rain.

I glanced up, my hair no longer dripping wet but still being damp, and squinted my eyes to see into his car. Harry was leaning across the middle console, one of his hands still gripping the steering wheel firmly. His jaw was locked and, even through the sheets of rain, I could see his piercing green eyes stare at me with disapproval.

“I didn’t think I would need one.” I yelled, trying to be heard over the rain that was pelting against the roof of his car. I seen Harry roll his eyes and gesture for me to get in the car, which I happily complied with. I ran the few feet that I was away from the car and quickly sat down in the seat, the door having already been open because Harry had opened it when he seen me stand up.

I sighed in relief and relaxed back against the seat, my body being cocooned by the warmness from Harry’s heater that was on full blast. I reached to buckle my seat belt, but decided not to my seat belt and inhaled deeply, my body relaxing even more when my nose was filled with the familiar, and comforting, scent of mint and the cologne that I have yet to figure out what kind it is.

“You’re going to get a cold.” Harry growled, his eyes focused on the road as he began to drive. I didn’t bother putting on my seatbelt because, as shocking as it was, Harry was actually driving under the speed limit.

I rolled my eyes. “Says the one who took me to a park to play in the snow without the proper snow gear.” I looked over at him and smirked, his jaw having gone even tighter than before. It wasn’t like I didn’t have fun, I was just trying to prove a point.

“Lucky I didn’t fuck you ‘cause I didn’t have the ‘proper gear’.” He said, mimicking my voice when he said the last two words. I couldn’t help but giggle quietly.

As I have come to know Harry more, I have learned that he not only likes to talk about my ass, but having sex with me to. I didn’t read too much into it, but to be honest, I would have sex with him if he ever asked me too, even if we were only friends. I may be a virgin, but I really didn’t care because who wouldn’t jump at the opportunity to have sex with the curly haired god.

“Yeah right, Harry. Probably don’t even have the proper gear in your pants.” I teased him, knowing that I always hit a nerve when I talked about the size of his manhood.

Instead of seeing the usual flare of anger in his eyes, I seen a slight twinkle of humor. “Don’t tempt me to pull out my penis, because I will, then i’ll show you what a good, proper fuck is.”

I gasped loudly and hit his chest, my cheeks heating up a tad bit but not that much. The thought to continue commenting on his penis was tempting, but he was mostly all talk. He would say something like that, but never go through with it. It was quite disappointing, actually.

“I need some of your references before I agree to anything.” I grinned widely and turned to look at him, my eyes doing that stupid thing by crinkling at the corners.

Harry stopped at a stop light, that was barely visible through the rain, and turned completely in his seat so he was facing me. He licked his bottom lip and leaned towards me, his nose brushing across my cheek and resting pressed against the side of my head, and his lips brushing against my ear.  

“They’re all in the hospital. Haven’t heard from any of them since the night we had sex. My penis put em in a coma.” He whispered, his warm breath tickling against my neck. I twitched slightly, but turned my face so my cheek was pressing against his, my lips only inches away from his ear.

“Then I guess you’ll never get in my pants if none of them can vouch for you.” My lips brushed against his earlobe, and I smirked when I felt him shiver. I pulled back and stared at him before I turned and looked out the window. “The lights green.” I mumbled after a few seconds. I could still feel Harry’s gaze on me, but I didn’t turn around.

I finally heard him sigh deeply before he turned back around in his seat and the car began to move, faster than before. I watched as the trees went by in a blur, and if I focused on nothing, I could see my own reflection in the window. I hated seeing myself though, because I could already feel how depressed I was. I didn’t need to see what I looked like too.

I hated when me and Harry had these types of conversations, because despite it being fun at the time, they always ended with me realizing I never would be with Harry the way I wanted to be. He has been at my school for a few months now and he hasn’t been in one relationship, even though people are practically throwing themselves at him. So, he is either uninterested in anybody at that school, has a secret girlfriend-- or boyfriend--, or he simply just doesn’t want to date anyone.

_ I was hoping it was the later, though. Because if it were either of the other two, I would be crushed. _

  
  



	13. Chapter 13

I watched, entrapped in the way the smaller raindrop raced the larger raindrop. It was a slow race, but eventually the larger raindrop ended up winning when it suddenly rolled down the window and disappeared. I was disappointed, way more than I should be. I was a seventeen year old boy wanting the smaller raindrop to win, talk about childish.

I frowned and shifted in my seat. My clothes were starting to dry from the heat, but they were still extremely wet. I was no longer shivering, which that was a plus, but I was dreading the moment Harry pulled into the store's parking lot, forcing me to get out of his car. He had offered not too long ago to take me to the store and me being the wimp I am agreed to it. There was no way in hell I was going to go home with no groceries, and I most definitely was not going to walk in the rain.

“So, you going to tell me what you were doing out in the rain alone?” Harry asked from beside me, his head turning for a fraction of a second to look at me.

I waited until he was looking at the slightly visible road again before I turned to look at him. He look calmer now than he did when he had picked me up. One of his hands were resting loosely on the steering wheel and the other one was tapping a rhythm into his thigh, one I didn’t know and could barely hear above the rain pelting against his car.

I shrugged. “My mom wanted me to go to the store.” I said, only telling him half of the truth. I wasn’t about to tell him that my mom was having me sell drugs for her so we could make ends meet, or at least attempt to.

“And you didn’t think to call me sooner.” The question floated in the air for a second as I pondered what he was asking. Why did he want me to call him sooner than I had? Was he really that worried about me?

My thoughts were soon interrupted by a bright streak lighting up the sky, followed by a loud crash of thunder. I jumped in my seat and curled in on myself. I didn’t mind the rain, but as soon as thunder and lightening were involved, I was a shaking mess.

Minutes passed by in silence before I finally sat up straight again. When I looked at Harry, I could see he was curious about what just happened, but I was grateful he didn’t ask anything or comment on the fact that I was just a ball in his seat.

“I didn’t want to bother you. I was fine on my own until it started to rain.” I said, and this time I was speaking the whole truth. I was fine walking on my own. I have been alone for the past nine years and I was used to it, so walking alone didn’t bother me too much.

The car started to slow down before it finally stopped. I looked out the window and squinted, being able to see the bright glowing lights from the store through the rain. I sighed deeply and bowed my head. Here goes another fun trip in the rain that would end with me getting soaked, considering how far Harry had parked away from the doors.

“Stay.” I heard Harry tell me before his door was slammed shut. I looked over at where he was sitting, in hopes I could see where he was walking, but his body had already disappeared into the dark rain.

I sat nervously in my seat for a few seconds, my hands tugging at a loose string on my pants. I heard, and felt, as the trunk was being slammed shut. A few seconds later, my door was being opened and Harry was standing next to me, his curls were soaking wet and dripping onto his already wet shirt.

I looked up at him and smiled when I seen he was holding a blue denim jacket and an umbrella. “Don’t you need a jacket too?” I asked him as I slipped out of the car, only getting a few drops of rain on me before I was standing under the large umbrella with Harry.

“Take the damn jacket.” Harry growled and before I could protest, my right arm was being shoved into the warm jacket. I didn’t realize how big it was until I pulled it completely on. The sleeves were way too long so I was forced to roll them up until they actually fit, and the jacket hung loosely around my body.

“You’re stubborn.” I state and take ahold of the umbrella, only to have Harry swat my hands away. He glared down at me, letting me know he was holding it, and slammed his car door shut before he locked it.

I rolled my eyes and waited for Harry to turn back around before we began to walk towards the doors. I didn’t realize how close we were until Harry’s arm brushed my back, his fingers straying just above the waist of my pants. I gulped loudly and buried my face in the material of the jacket and without my permission, I inhaled deeply and practically melted at the scent, which smelled heavily like Harry.

“What kind of cologne do you use?” I suddenly blurt out when we are a few feet away from the automatic sliding doors.

“I don’t know. Some stupidly expensive kind my mum insists on buying me.” I nodded my head slowly. Well, there goes my plan on buying some and spraying it around my room so I could always smell Harry.

_ Yeah, it’s probably a good thing you fucking creep. _

I sucked on my cheek and sighed when we finally walked through the doors. The tile floor was wet, but so were my shoes so I didn’t care too much. I left Harry behind me, who was shaking the umbrella before he folded it back up, and grabbed a green shopping cart. I patted my pocket to make sure the money was still in there, and when I felt the obvious bulge in my pocket, I felt myself relax a bit.

I hummed under my breath and began to push the cart through the store. It wasn’t crowded with people like it usually was. There was a few people roaming around the store but other than them, it was only me and Harry and the employees. I looked around at all the choices of food, and even though I wanted to get a carton of ice cream, I pushed myself to walk past it and ignore all the many options.

I grabbed random items like bread, lunch meat, crisps, eggs, pasta, meat, etc. By the time I finished, my cart was already over halfway full and I have spent close to two hundred dollars. Harry had spent the majority of our shopping trip walking behind me, and I could practically feel his eyes burning holes into my body, but I didn’t say anything. I was comforted by the fact that I had Harry here with me, and I didn’t want him to leave because I didn’t want him staring at me.

When I couldn’t think of anything else to get at the moment, I turned the cart around and began to walk towards the front of the store. Harry had looked up at me and smiled, which I returned. We passed by the ice cream section again and my stomach grumbled quietly. I closed my eyes for a second and debated if ice cream was really worth me getting yelled at or not.

“Just get the ice cream already.” Harry said impatiently from behind me.

“I don’t know if I should.” I bit my lip and glanced behind me at him. He rolled his eyes and mumbled something under his breath before he stomped over to the ice cream section and grabbed a large container of mint chocolate chip ice cream.

“How did you know that that was my favorite?” I asked him and bit down on my bottom lip, watching him as he set the green container in my cart.

He folded his arms over his chest and leaned back on his heels, his biceps bulging a little. “Jen told me on the day of your birthday party so I could buy your ice cream.”

“What else did she tell you?” I asked and leaned on the shopping cart, using my forearms to hold me up.

He shrugged and looked around the store for a second before he looked down at me. “That you’re,” Leaning in closer, Harry unfolded his arms and gently grabbed ahold of my wrist. My heart was beating wildly in both anticipation and nervousness as he leaned in closer. “Smart.” He ran his hand down the back on my hand and hooked his pinky with mine before he pulled back and stood up, looking and acting as if nothing had just happened.

I, on the other hand, could feel my stomach tying itself in knots, my lungs screaming and begging for me to breath, and my head swimming from lack of oxygen. When I felt like I was about to pass out, I finally inhaled deeply and grabbed ahold of the shopping cart, holding onto it with dear life.

Why did he always do this to me? I blinked the stars away from my eyes and began to push the cart when I got feeling back in my legs. I slowly walked over to the empty check out line and, like I was in a trance, I began to unload the cart and put everything on the stand. What Harry had told me wasn’t what I was expecting, but his actions had made up for it. I know he was teasing me, and I hated it, but I liked the feeling I got when he was that close to me.

I pulled the wad of cash out of my pocket when the woman gave me the total and handed her a little less than half of the wad. She did whatever it is she does, then handed me back my change and wished me good luck. I nodded at her, my voice seemingly lost, and began to push the cart full of grocery bags that Harry had once again loaded.

When we reached the door, Harry opened the umbrella and instead of walking in front of me, he stepped behind me. “Put your feet up on the bottom of the cart and hold onto the handle.” He instructed and instead of arguing with him, I did as he said. The cart tipped back a little from my weight, but the food ultimately outweighed me and the cart went back down.

I was curious as to why he wanted me like this, but I soon found out why when the handle of the umbrella was being propped up on my shoulder and Harry was pressing himself flat against my back. He placed his hands right next to mine on the handle and he situated himself behind me, making it so my butt was pressing against his crotch.

I blushed furiously and tried to move, but Harry growled loudly. “Stop moving.” His tone of voice alone had me stopping. I leaned over the cart and tried to apply most of my weight on it, but all that did was press my butt further into his crotch.

“Wouldn’t it be easier if I just walked beside you?” I asked, sounding breathless from the way the cart was crushing my stomach. Before responding, Harry began to push the cart out of the doors.

With each step he took, his crotch nudged against my ass and I could feel each and every bump go straight to my crotch. It began to grow hard, and I tried to hide my small bulge as best as I could and I seemed to because Harry didn’t say anything about it. “If you want to, go ahead.” Harry said, his voice sounding husky and startling me.

I forgot what my question was, forcing me to think back to what I asked. I shook my head instead of saying anything because I didn’t trust my voice enough. I could practically see the smirk I knew he had. When Harry won, he always got this cocky grin on his face, or he smirked, and right now was one of those times that he was most definitely smirking.

The walk to the car seemed a lot longer than it really was. I tried to occupy my mind with something other than how good it felt to be this close to Harry. His back was pressing against mine and if I focused on one particular spot for long enough, I could feel his heartbeat thumping against my back, etching the rhythm into skin.

“Get in the car and i’ll put everything away.” Harry said, his voice making his chest rumble against my back. I shivered at the feeling and shifted my feet a little, trying to get a better position but there was really no use. The car was only a few feet in front of me, so me moving wasn’t really necessary.

Harry moved from behind me when he reached the car, and I was disappointed at the lost of heat but I ignored the feeling and climbed down off the cart. I stretched a little and groaned when I rubbed my tummy. There was going to be a bruise there, no doubt, but it was honestly worth it to me. I got to spend the past three minutes pressed against Harry, so this bruise was a win in my book.

I grabbed the umbrella, which was still propped up on my shoulder, and held it up high enough that it reached Harry too. I turned around to face him and seen that he was already soaking wet, his hair sticking flat against his head. If he was that wet, that means that the umbrella hadn’t been covering him since we left the store. It was only covering his chest because it was pressed against me, but his back was completely soaked, looking like he had been laying on his back in a puddle of water.

“I didn’t need to whole damn umbrella.” I said, clearly sounding annoyed. I knew it was a sweet gesture, but I wasn’t the type that wanted a guy to possibly die of hypothermia just because I didn’t want to get wet.

“Didn’t say you did, I just figured you could use it.” He shrugged, as if he was dismissing my obvious disapproval. I frowned and looked at him, then I let go of the umbrella and watched with a smirk on my lips as he lunged forward, trying to pick it up before it fell to the ground, but the wind blew it sideways.

“God dammit Louis!” He growled, his eyes following the umbrella that finally fell to the ground by the car.

The rain felt like a cold shower, and it soon began to seep through my clothes. I was completely wet in only a matter of seconds. Harry watched me for a second, his green eyes going darker than I have ever seen, before he unlocked his trunk and quickly shoved all the groceries in it.

As I waited for him, I tilted my head back and just relished the way the cool water felt hitting against my warm face. I began to hum a song under my breath and, my feet moving on their own accord, I began to dance a little in the rain. I wouldn’t necessarily call it dancing, but it was close to it. My feet were moving along to the rhythm of the song I was humming, and my hips were swaying, but that was it.

I was so caught up in what I was doing, that I didn’t notice Harry standing in front of me until he began to laugh. My eyes, which I guessed were closed, quickly snapped open and I looked up to see him staring down at me, his eyes dancing with humor and replacing the previous look of anger he had.

_ Damn, this boy is bipolar. _

“What are you doing?” He questioned, his dimples popping out as his smile grew wider. I ducked my head and shrugged, the mood to dance suddenly gone.

“I was dancing.” I whispered quietly, feeling like I was going to blush but I didn’t.

I felt Harry grab ahold of my chin, his grip firm, before he tilted my head up to look at him. “What am I going to do with you?” It sounded like he was asking himself rather than asking me, but I felt something deep inside my stomach tug at the way he was looking at me.

“What does that mean?” I slipped my bottom lip between my teeth and blinked away the raindrops that collected on my eyelashes. They landed on my cheek and slide down until they reached my chin, then they disappeared.

“It means, what am I going to do with you? You’re stubborn, quiet, shy and I can never read you.” His voice grew softer, and his eyebrows furrowed. He looked like he was getting lost in thought, but his eyes were flickering back and forth between mine.

His breath was ghosting over my lips and I wanted to breath in the scent, but once again, I couldn’t remember how to breath. “I used to be readable, until I grew up and realized I needed to protect myself.” I rushed out, and the words came out jumbled, but by the way Harry was looking at me, I knew he had caught onto every word I had just said.

“Will I ever be able to know what happened to you? To make you this way?” He asked, and he wasn’t judging me. He sounded worried, and curious, unlike most of the people who would ask me that same exact question.

I shrugged and chuckled weakly. “If you stay around long enough.” I wanted to look away from him, to stare at something other than his emerald eyes that entrapped me in their endless depths.

“I’m not going anywhere.” He whispered, and if I wasn’t mistaken, his lips were growing closer to mine. I wanted this, I wanted him to kiss me. I had been waiting weeks for this to happen, but just as his lips were about to brush against mine, his cell phone began to ring.

I jumped backwards, my heart jumping up into my throat. Holy jesus. I was just about to kiss Harry fucking Styles. I heard Harry make a noise that sounded a lot like a snarl before he ripped his phone out of his pocket, seemingly not caring that it was getting wet, and swiped the screen before he lifted it up to his ear.

“I’m on my way home now. Stop calling me.” He hissed into the phone before he pulled it down and pressed his finger against it roughly. Opening the door to my side, Harry threw his phone into the driver's seat and turned to face me.

“I’m so..” I cut him off before he could finish.

“Don’t be, it’s fine. Just take me home, please.” I ignored the flash of hurt in his eyes and climbed into the passenger seat. The seat were still semi warm, but that quick envelope of warmness vanished and was replaced with the coldness from my clothes that was seeping into my bones.

I pulled my phone out of my pants pocket, as well as the money, and made sure neither one of them were wet before I set them in the middle console, along with Harry’s that I grabbed off of his seat. It took Harry a few minutes to relocate the umbrella, but as soon as he did, he folded it down and climbed into the car. He threw the black umbrella into the back seat, the movement making both of us get sprinkled with water.

He cupped both his hands over his mouth and exhaled deeply before he rubbed his hands together, trying to warm them. After a few seconds of that, he turned the car on and began to drive. I sat like I had before, my back facing him and my forehead pressed against the window.

Minutes or even hours could have passed before Harry pulled up infront of my house. I didn’t even ask how he knew where I lived because he was Harry Styles, who apparently knew everything about me. We both climbed out of the car and I grabbed all the groceries, refusing Harry’s help. My back bowed from all the weight of the groceries, and the rain was starting to lighten up, but it was still enough that I managed to get even wetter.

I thanked Harry quietly before I made my way up to the house. I struggled for a second before I finally got the door opened. But as soon as I did, I set all the groceries on the floor by the door. I sighed deeply and rubbed over my sore arms. Thankfully, there were no marks because of the jacket I had on, so they didn’t hurt too bad.

_ Shit, Harry’s jacket. _

Quicker than I have ever moved before, I stepped over the groceries and flung the door open. I closed the door behind me and was jogging down the stairs when I realized the person standing on the porch, hidden underneath the faint light that was barely glowing. I spun around and yelped in surprise when I ran smack into Harry’s chest. He had literally just been standing a few feet away when I noticed him, so how the hell did he get to where he was standing right now without making a noise.

I shook my head and took the jacket off before I handed it to him. He slung it over his arm, without saying a word, and handed me my phone and the money I had left in the console. “Oh shit, thanks.” I said, and to say I was awkward would be an understatement.

I was getting ready to kiss this person not too long ago, and I bet he was thankful that he had gotten a phone call so that he wasn’t forced to kiss me. “Listen, Louis.” He began, but I shook my head and held a finger up to my lips.

“You don’t have to apologize. I understand. It was just a spur of the moment thing, I know that nobody would willingly kiss me.” My voice was quiet to start off with, but closer to the end, it was just above a whisper.

Harry sighed in frustration and took one large step towards me, his chest bumping against me and making me stumble back. I didn’t stumble for too long before my back was being pressed flat against the wall. “When are you going to understand that  _ I _  am more than willing to do things with you.” He growled, and I gulped loudly, then I looked up at him from underneath my eyelashes.

And just like that, everything began to melt away. I could no longer hear the heavy rain, I could no longer feel my heart thumping away in my chest or the way my clothes clung to my freezing body, and I could no longer see anything other than Harry. He was all I could hear, smell, see, and feel.

He was panting loudly, each breath ringing in my ears. He smelt of rain, mint, cologne and another scent I couldn’t quite put my finger on. His green eyes, which were the only things I could see, were screaming sincerity. And finally, all I could feel was his chest against mine and his breath that was ghosting over my face.

His scent seemed to intensify by the second, and it soon became the only thing I could focus on. Neither of us spoke, not even when Harry lifted his large hand up to my cheek or when he leaned down so our lips were almost brushing. “I am going to kiss you.” He whispered.

My heart had a mini spaz, then it lurched up into my throat and stayed there. My palms began to sweat and to keep them from shaking, I gripped Harry’s wet shirt tightly and stood up on my tippy toes. I ignored the butterflies in my stomach and tipped my head back a little, causing my adam's apple to protrude against my pale skin.

And, true to his words, I felt a soft, yet rough pair of plump lips press against mine.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter may be crap but I wanted to hurry and get a chapter to you guys tonight! I also blessed you guys with a chapter from Harry's pov, so I hope you guys enjoy!!! :)

**_Harry's POV:_ **

He was so bloody frustrating! How the hell could I make him realize that I was here because I wanted to be here! That I had almost kissed him because I wanted to kiss him! Not because I felt fucking sympathy for him, but because I want to fuck his mouth with my tongue.

Out of instinct, I suddenly, but gently lifted my hand up to his smooth cheek. I flickered my eyes between his eyes, then down to his lips, then back up to his eyes. I needed to do this. I needed him to shut up and realize I was doing this because I like him. “I’m going to kiss you.”I whispered, my eyes searching his that mirrored the sky early in the morning, when the sun is just shining on the bright blue sky with not a cloud in sight.

I felt his shaking hands grab my shirt tightly, some water droplets rolling down his hands and landing on the porch with a quiet, continuous thud. He tipped his head back, exposing his pale neck that looked so perfect in this pale lighting. His lips parted slightly as he took a deep gasp in before exhaling it, making his strawberry flavored mouthwash wash over my face.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before I went for it. I pressed my lips lightly against his, and was oddly pleased that I tasted the faint flavor of his cherry mint lip gloss. My heart rate increased and I felt like I was literally seeing stupid fucking fireworks behind my eyes. What the fuck was wrong with me? That shit only happens in movies.

I pushed my thoughts down and focused on his soft lips as I tentatively moved mine over his. I kept the kiss light and sweet, the way I knew Louis would like his first kiss to be. We kissed for what only seemed like seconds before the need for air grew strong. I broke the kiss, but rested my forehead against his. I gasped in a deep breath and gently brushed my thumb along the top of his cheek.

It was him that broke the silence, his breathy voice sending a strange tingle down my spin. “Why do you like me?” He had asked, loosening his grip on my shirt. I felt a weird pulling sensation in my heart. I didn’t know what this feeling was, but I didn’t like it.

“Why do you doubt yourself?” I remarked, slowly letting my heavy eyelids flutter open. Louis was already staring at me, so the moment I opened my eyes, my blown green eyes were locked with equally as blown blue eyes. Louis’ red, slightly puffy lips were parted as he panted loudly.

His eyes swam with many emotions, too many that I gave up after the first two. The two that I had caught was amazement, and wonder. He was amazed at the fact that I had wanted to kiss him, and wonder as to why I actually did it, and why I actually like him.

“I just, I don’t believe you are really.” He whispered, and I felt that pulling at my heart again. I internally growled and stood up straight, letting my hand fall down to Louis hip. I took a step back and, at the same time, mine and Louis’ hands fell.

We stared at each other, one in a new light, the other in utter awe. I was in utter awe in the how innocent he looked right now, even with his droopy eyes and puffy red lips. “Please, your imagination couldn’t make something this sexy, up.” I said jokingly, my lips stretching into the small the moment I seen the crinkles by his eyes appear.

“You wish you were made up in my imagination.” He said in his usual sassy tone. He popped out a hip and placed his hand on top of it, giving me the ‘you best be playing boy’ look, if that’s even possible.  

I raised an eyebrow and smirked down at him. “I wanna  _ live  _ in that imagination.” Of course he wouldn’t understand that I meant his sexual imagination, but I knew what I meant. I wanted to be a part of every sexual thing he has thought of, including his deepest, darkest wants.

Louis laughed quietly and glanced at his door that was open just a crack. “I gotta go inside.” He said quietly, his eyes never leaving the door. I nodded slowly and took a step backwards, giving him enough room to walk past me without touching me. He did just that, making sure his elbow wasn’t in the way of my torso. I waited for him to reach the door before I bent down at grabbed my jacket that I had dropped to the ground.

I looked back at Louis when I heard his door squeaking shut. I took two strides before I was at his door. I placed my hand flat on the door and held it in place, my fist, with the jacket in it, clenching. I blew out a deep breath through my nose, then leaned down and hovered over his face for a second before I placed a soft, gentle kiss on his forehead. I let my lips linger for a second longer than was necessary, then I turned around and walked down the driveway.

I jogged down to my car, enjoying the way the rain felt against my burning skin, and climbed into my car. I leaned over the seat and rolled down the window, grinning when I seen Louis was still standing in the doorway. “I’ll be here to pick you up for school tomorrow!” I hollered out the window. I grinned at him one last time before I rolled up the window. I used the extra shirt that was on the backseat to wipe off the passenger seat, which had gotten wet from when I rolled the window down.

I sat back in my seat and before I could process what had just happened, I pressed my foot down on the gas and grinned darkly when the car lurched forward, then sped down the seat. I held the steering wheel tightly and when I was out of Louis’ sight, I slowed the car down to the usual speed limit.

I may want to impress the boy, but I didn’t want to get a ticket for trying to impress him when he isn’t in sight. Besides, I already have him exactly the way I want him. He’s warming up to me, therefore I get to see more into his past and I will be able to understand him a lot more.

I focused on the road the entire drive home, which took about five minutes. I knew the minute that I stopped doing something, I would think back to what had happened on Louis’ porch, and I wasn’t ready just yet. When I finally came into view of my three story house, I sighed deeply and could feel as the tiredness began to settle into my bones.

I had been asleep for an hour when Louis had called me. Before that, I was out at a party with some chick I met at the grocery store. I hadn’t done anything with anyone, of course, but so what if I did? Wasn’t like I was in a committed relationship with anyone. All I did was kiss the small lad, which was after the party so before then, I really had nothing to worry about.

But I did. I worried about the way Louis’ face would look when he finally heard about the girl, or guy, I fucked at the party. Of course it would take at least a week for the news to reach him, so I would have a little more time to try to ease him into it, but I will never be able to handle Louis looking at me with disappointment in his eyes. Gah, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I have recently found myself  _ caring  _ about someone other than my mum.

I care about Louis and everything that has to do with him. I worried about the bruise I had seen on his cheek those many weeks ago, which had been hand shaped. I worried about the way he would react when he found out about my past relationships, well more like one night stands. Back in my hometown I was known for fucking, and kicking ass without taking names. I would never fight, or fuck the same person I have already had sex with before, so it was like a one night stand.

I shook my head and pulled into my driveway, watching the way the light twinkled off the raindrops. I pressed the button thing on my car door and one of the four garage doors opened. I rolled my eyes and pulled my car into it, parking this car next to my black mercedes c300. I don’t know what it is with the color black, but I find it fucking awesome that way it looked like in the sun.

I climbed out of my car and shook out my wet hair before I walked to the door that lead into the hallway. I shoved my car keys into my pocket and held my phone in my hand, using the other hand to open the door. The moment the white, wooden door was opened, the strong smell of garlic reached my nose.

My stomach grumbled loudly and I jogged to the kitchen, being all too eager to eat dinner. I haven’t eaten all day today, considering I have been out since six last night, and the moment I got home I was passed out. My mom was in the kitchen when I reached it, her back facing me as she chopped up a salad.

I walked over to the kitchen island and set down in one of the short stools, my feet planting themselves on the floor. I leaned on the counter, using my forearms to hold myself up, and looked around the kitchen. My mom had decided on garlic bread, salad and spaghetti, with a cup of coca cola. “I’m starving.” I murmur, picking at the bowl of cheese that was next to the large metal bowl full of spaghetti. I lifted a hand full up to my lips and sprinkled the orange shreds on my tongue.

I chewed quickly, snorting when I seen my mom eyeing me. I shrugged innocently and lifted my hands up, as if saying ‘I surrender’. I grinned at her and climbed out of my chair, carefully making my way down the long hallway, making a left then a right. You walk through the door and then you enter the dining room, which has a large dining table in the center of it and pictures littering the walls.

Gemma, my older sister, was sitting at the far right end of the table, and next to her, at the head of the table, was my mums husband Robin. I hummed quietly, trying to cover the noise my wet shoes made with each step I took, and set next to where my mom was sitting, which was next to

Robin and across from Gemma. I unfolded the napkin from around my utensils and set aside the salad fork, bread knife, and normal knife to cut up your spaghetti. I grabbed the large fork and set it on my plate, then crumpled up the napkin and threw it over my shoulder.

I hated all the extra utensils my mom insisted we use. Just give me a damn fork, knife and spoon, and i’ll manage just fine on my own. I rolled my eyes and clicked on my phone, frowning when I didn’t see a new text from Louis. Strange, he usually would have text me by now. My frown deepened and I opened up my texting app, my eyes widening when I seen that my ‘Mind if I come over?” text to Louis didn’t send last night.

I felt half relief, and half worry wash over my body when I realized he didn’t receive my drunken text. I nodded my head, god only knows why, and deleted the text before I sent “Still standing in the doorway like a fool?” I smirked lightly and locked my phone, then set it on the table next to my plate. Not even five seconds later my mom was walking through the door, Maria, our maid, following behind her. Both of their arms were filled with food, my mom’s with the spaghetti bowl and plate full of breadsticks, and Maria’s were full of salad dressing, the cheese bowl, and the salad bowl.

They both stood on opposite sides of the table and set the bowls down, having to cross arms more than once. When the meal was set out, Maria excused herself and left the room, while my mom sat down in her seat. They all joined hands and my mom looked at me expectantly, but all I did was roll my eyes and grab a piece of bread. Her chest deflated in defeat and she bowed her head, nodding along to the prayer Robin was speaking.

_ Stupid religious morons. _

I ripped off a piece of the garlic bread and shoved it in my mouth to silence myself. I mimicked Robin as he spoke, and leaned forward to put two great big spoon fulls of spaghetti on my plate. I shoveled the spaghetti into my mouth and was already on my third mouth full when they finally said amen. I quickly swallowed my food, having to chug half of my coke to make it slide down, and repeated everyone.

They all looked at me, then looked down at their food. All of them in incredibly weird sync, they began to load their plate and eat. I ignored them and shoveled the rest of my food in my mouth, including my garlic bread, and chugged the rest of my coke by the time they were even halfway through their meal. I burped loudly, ignoring my mother’s nagging about that not being proper table manners, and stood up from my chair. I grabbed my phone, told my mom the meal was delicious, and walked through the door and down the hallway.

I walked past the many rooms and soon the small hallway turned into a large opening. There was a piano in the middle of the room, and the wall beyond that was all glass that looked out at the backyard. Infront of the piano was where I was standing, was the kitchen door and a little beyond that was the front door that had a large, white rug with different designs on it. On either sides of the rooms were stair cases that led you upstairs. I took the left staircase, taking two to three stairs at a time, and soon I was at the top of the second level stairs. I turned left and walked down, passing three doors, and stopped at the fourth door on the right side. The door was painted a blood red and when you opened it, your eyes were filled with nothing but white walls.

I haven’t gotten a chance to paint my room the color I want, so for now, it is an ugly white color that looks weird with all my posters of three days grace, I prevail, Sleeping with sirens and other bands,  and pictures of me and my mom were hanging randomly around the room. On the wall next to the door there was a large queen sized mattress, and next to that was a black nightstand. On the wall opposite of my bed, there is glass doors that lead to my balcony, and next to that there is a black dresser littered with stuff. On the wall, which was almost completely blank, there was a door you walked into that lead into my bathroom, and the door inside that lead into my closet.

I sighed deeply and locked my door after I closed it, then quickly began to strip from my clothes on my way to the bathroom. I threw my clothes around the room and by the time I reached my bathroom door, I was in nothing but my socks. I peeled those off my feet and threw them next to my shoes, then I walked into the bathroom and towards the shower. My bathroom was large, the second largest in the house, and it had two sinks, a bathtub in the right corner of the room, a toilet on the wall next to the door, and in the middle of the bathroom there was a shower.

I flicked on the light and walked over to the shower. I pulled back the curtain and stepped up into the shower, closing the red curtains behind me. I turned on the warm water and closed my eyes, my muscles relaxing as the warm water cascaded over my body. My skin had been so cold that for the first few seconds of the water pelting against my body, it began to make my skin burn but it soon faded and I was once again left in a state of calmness.

As my body began to relax, so did my mind. I found myself remembering back to the kiss me and Louis had shared, my lips tingling in remembrance. I imagined that the kiss had went deeper, and my tongue somehow managed to get into his mouth. Even at the thought, I felt my penis start to grow and because I couldn’t shut my mind off, I was soon left with a throbbing boner.

_ All because of the complicated, blue eyed boy I have found myself drawn to. _

****


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So, I know this chapter jumps back and forth between the characters pov a lot, but I just wanted to get a little bit of insight on what they were both feeling. I hope you guys like it! This chapter was written quickly, so I apologize if it has a few mistakes.
> 
> Anyway, have a lovely day!! 
> 
> XX

**_Harry’s POV:_ **

I shoved my phone into my pocket and grabbed my jean jacket off of the end of my bed. I wasn’t going to wear it, but I wanted to make sure I had it just in case Louis needed it. I ran my fingers through my untamed curls and walked out of my room, then jogged down the stairs. I slung the jacket over my shoulder and grabbed my keys off of the table next to the door, which is where Maria apparently put my keys after I put them wherever I had set them after I had gotten home last night.

I rubbed my eyes with my palm and walked out the door, not even bothering to wish everyone a good day because I knew they were all already gone. Robin had to get his company by six in the morning, and my mum had to be at the hospital by six thirty seven. Gemma, who has done absolutely nothing with her life since she graduated, was either out shopping, or at the gym trying to get guys numbers.

I shook my head and, using the button on my keychain, I opened the fourth garage door and debated on which car I wanted to take. The impala was my favorite, which everyone knew, but I haven’t driven the mercedes in a long time. Sighing, I threw the door open on my impala and grabbed my book bag before I closed the door softly and walked around the the drivers side on my mercedes. I opened the door, threw the jacket and backpack in the passenger seat, and climbed into the car.

My legs were squashed as soon as I was sat in the seat, forcing me to mess with the stupid buttons on the side of the seat that allowed me to adjust how I wanted to sit. I scooted it back as far as I could and even then my legs were still a little bent, I would have to get used to it. I threw my backpack and jacket into the backseat and started the car, jumping at the sound of the smooth, yet loud purr of the engine.

It was nothing like my impala at all, but then again, no car ever would be. I cast one more look at my car before I backed out of the garage and down the driveway. I pressed the button to the garage just as I reached the end of the driveway and watched as my black car disappeared. I sighed deeply and shook my head, focusing on the road as I began to drive.

It took me less than five minutes to get to Louis’ house, but that was because I was going ten over the speed limit. I don’t know what it is, but the closer I get to Louis, the faster my heart beats and the more nervous I become. My palms continued to slide down off the steering wheel as I drove, and my one knee was hitting the bottom of the steering wheel with each bounce of my knee.

When I finally did reach Louis’ worn down house, I parked my car next to the curb and rolled down the window, inhaling the fresh, crisp air. It was only about seven fifteen in the morning, so birds were heard chirping in the distance and the sun has yet to fully break free from the thick, white clouds. Today was going to be a good day, based on the clouds, but it was still a little chilly outside so I was hoping it wouldn’t suddenly change and go all stormy.

I leaned back in my seat and fished my phone out of my pocket. I chewed on my upper lip and typed my password into the phone before I went to contacts. I was debating on whether or not I wanted to call him or text him, but my little problem was soon solved when the passenger door opened softly and a small body curled up in the seat.

I glanced over at Louis, my lips burning when I remembered what it had felt like to have his lips pressed against mine. He was wearing his usual black hoodie with a pair of black joggers. The hood to his hoodie was pulled up and he was facing the window, denying me to see his face. I frowned deeply and reached over to touch him.

“Don’t, Harry.” He whispered quietly, fog forming on the window from his warm breath. I retracted my arm and rested it on the middle console, my eyes focusing on the back of his head. Why was he being so strange today? Did he regret the kiss? Did he hate me now because I stole his first kiss?

I felt anger fuel my body, but I quickly shoved it down and regained my calm composure. Fine. If he wanted to pretend I wasn’t here, or whatever the fuck he was doing right now, then I would do the same. If a silent game is what he wants, then a silent game is what he will get. Except for when I play this game, I don’t break first. I have had a lifetime of practice on staying silent, and giving people the cold shoulder, so Louis Tomlinson better buckle up because I am known for being quite the silent dick.

****

**_Louis POV:_ **

He didn’t say anything about the kiss. Did he regret kissing me? Was I really that bad that after the first kiss, they go running? Well, technically Harry wasn’t running but he wasn’t exactly acting like he wanted to be around me. After I had told him not to touch me, the car has been eerily silent. The only sound is my soft breathing and the quiet song on the radio that had been intended as background noise.

I shifted in my seat and brushed my fingers across my lips, like I had done last night after Harry had kissed me. It was a strange feeling to have another human’s lips pressed against yours, but the way Harry was so soft and gentle made all my awkwardness slip away, or, at least it had slipped away last night. It was funny to me that my first kiss had went exactly like I had wanted it to, but the aftermath was not at all how I wanted it to turn out. I guess I only get lucky once every year.

I sighed sadly, the noise inaudible to Harry, and shook my head. I honestly had thought that he liked me, but he proved my thoughts wrong this morning. But wait, what if he isn’t talking because I told him not to touch me? Maybe I hurt his feelings? The thought alone has me laughing internally. In the time that I have known Harry, I have learned that he does not get hurt easily, especially by something as stupid as me telling him not to touch me.

I slid my glasses up my nose, having lost my contact container in my room last night, and finally risked a glance at Harry. He was glaring at the road as he drove, his jaw clenched tightly and his knuckles were turning white from how hard he was gripping the steering wheel. The car slowed down to a stop and painfully slow, Harry turned to look at me.

_ Damn, if looks could kill, I would be dead ten times over right now. _

I felt myself go completely still as fear began to course through my veins. I have never been afraid of Harry, even when I had good reasons to be, but I was right now. His eyes were dark and full of hatred, and I was practically shrinking from his gaze. My hands began to shake uncontrollably, but I didn’t want Harry to notice so I grasped the straps to my backpack tightly and ripped my gaze away from him.

He definitely hated me, there was no doubt about that now. I have only ever seen him look at someone like that once before, and it was when Seth had shoved me against the wall and dug his fingernails into my arm. Harry had went from the calm, collected one that was standing behind Jen, to the fuming badass everyone has came to know.

That was the first time I have ever felt completely comfortable in Harry’s presence though, and I think it’s because I  _ knew  _ he wouldn’t do anything to hurt me, that he wanted to protect me… Unlike now.

I swallowed thickly and tried to keep the tears that were burning the back of my eyes from falling. I watched the road the rest of the car ride, my blurry vision focusing on nothing in particular. The moment that Harry stopped his car in a parking spot at the school, I was already out of my car. I tugged my hood up further on my head and slung my backpack over my shoulder, making my way to the front doors.

I heard Harry close his door softly when I was almost to the doors, but I didn’t turn around to look at him or stop to wait for him. I opened the door and almost stopped out of habit to hold it open for him, but I quickly shook my head and walked through the door.

The hallways were full of students that were even more obnoxious then I remembered. I tried to block out their voices as I walked down the hallway, but it was soon proved to be a difficult task. They were all so loud and half of them were being complete and utter morons that were running around and throwing shit at each other.

I had been so used to walking down the hallway with Harry, who made it so nobody bumped into me, that I was actually shocked when a student ran passed me and bumped me with their shoulder. The force of it was enough to make me turn sideways a little, but it wasn’t the pain that was bothering me, it was the feeling of being completely alone again that had the tears start burning my eyes again.

~~~~~

 

I twirled my eraser on the table and watched as it went in circles for a few seconds on its own before it fell the the table. The stupid, simple thing had actually managedto get my mind off of things for a while, things like Harry. 

I haven’t talked to him today, since this morning, but I have seen him. Earlier today he was talking to the school slut, Nicole. In the few seconds I had been watching them, she had used three of her ‘special moves’. Which involved her flipping her hair, feeling the guy’s bicep, and holding his hand just to see how much bigger his was compared to hers.

I have watched her flirt with enough guys to know that if those three moves didn’t work, then she had a whole book full of them and eventually their little talk would end with her bent over a sink in the bathroom as they fuck her from behind.

When I called her the school slut, I wasn’t just saying that to be stereotypical, I was saying that because it’s true. She has had sex with almost every single guy in this school, excluding me. She has tried to have sex with me multiple times, and I turn her down every single time. The poor, pea sized brained girl just can’t seem to understand that I don’t like her.

When I had seen her flirting with Harry, I had felt nothing but jealousy. I shouldn’t even feel jealous, but I did. I wanted to shove something other than a dick down that girl’s throat, which was shocking because I usually wasn’t the voient type. If one of the teachers would have heard my thoughts then, they would think I was having a mental break down or something.

I grinned softly and shook my head, clearing my thoughts. It was just in time too, because only seconds later the bell was ringing. I blew out a deep breath and gathered up my things before I stood up. I walked by Jen’s desk, which was empty because she had a meeting, and walked out of her classroom.

Unlike every other day, the hallways weren’t empty. A few random students were walking down the hallway, two in the direction of me, and three in the direction I was heading in. The two that were walking towards me I noticed were Barbara and Shelby, both of which I went to elementary school with them. They both smiled at me and waved as they passed me, but I quickly looked down and pretended I didn’t notice it.

Those two are what you would consider the nice, but popular girls. They are known by every single person in this school, and loved by a lot because of how kind they are. They aren’t your typical popular girls, them actually being quite the opposite. It was refreshing to have in times such as now. It seems like all you see lately is students being bullied by the school jocks and cheerleaders, but students like these two prove those stereotypes wrong.

I felt like the three remaining students were looking at me over their shoulders, so the moment I was swallowed by the sea of students, I was actually relieved rather than scared or nervous. I walked along with the flow and soon I was forced to push through the barricade of students that felt like I was pushing against a brick wall.

Finally, a small opening became available and I quickly wedged myself through it. I managed to get through without any problems, other than my foot getting caught on another person’s. I caught myself before I could fall, shockingly, and scurried to the open door. I was dreading this class, because it was the only one I shared with Harry, other than Jen’s. But at least in Jen’s I could sit as far away from him as I’d like. In english I sat right next to him, so it was almost impossible to ignore his perverted comments.

When I walked through the door, I lifted my head up a little so I could look around the classroom. The chairs were placed in the same order, and a few of them were occupied by students. My gaze moved to the back of the classroom and when I seen Harry sitting in his seat, his feet propped up on the other chair, I quickly looked down. Sitting next to him was Nicole, who was apparently in this class. Her long, perfectly manicured fingernails stood out against the blue material on Harry’s denim jacket, the one I had wore yesterday.

I ignored the bubble of jealousy I got and I walked to take my seat, which was next to Harry, but on the opposite side of Nicole. I gripped my backpack strap tighter and set down next to him, ignoring the pang of hurt I got when he tilted his body away from me. I set my bag under my seat and folded my arms across my chest, my eyes focusing on the board that had nothing written on it.

I tried not to listen to what they were saying, but when her squeaky laugh broke through my sound barrier, it became way to tempting. I tilted my head a little towards them, but not enough that they would notice, and pretended like I was playing with my fingers. Like usual, my bottom lip slipped between my teeth and I chewed on it, waiting impatiently for Nicole to stop laughing.

“The party was fun! I didn’t expect to see you there, but you definitely made it worth the trip.” She said around her laughter, but she sounded anything but sincere. She probably was surprised that he had went, but one thing you could pick out if you listened closely, was the small amount of disappointment she felt, but it was only her that knew what she was disappointed about.

_ Stop paying attention to her, moron. Harry went to a party with Nicole. _

At the realization, it felt like all the breath was knocked out of my lungs and I felt the urge to vomit. He had went to a party with Nicole? When was this? Was it yesterday after he dropped me off at my house? Did he go from kissing me, to fucking Nicole?

The vomit started to build up my throat, but I swallowed it back and tried to think back on any happy memory I had. Unwanted images of Harry lying in the snow, the tip of his nose and cheeks tinted a red from the chilly weather, and his bright green eyes popping due to the red that rimmed his eyes. I felt myself relax, but I didn’t want to. I didn’t want Harry to be the reason I can go from the verge of vomiting, to looking like a lovestruck fool.

I chanced a glance at them out of the corner of my eye. Nicole was leaning forward, making her breasts pop out of the top of her shirt, and her fingers were moving over an anchor tattoo on Harry’s right wrist. I wanted to lean forward and slap her hand away, but I refrained from doing so when I seen the smile Harry had. His eyes were bright and his lips were stretched into a grin, making his dimples pop out.

“Maybe I can come over to your house after school today so I can get a good look at all of your tattoos?” She asked, her hand trailing from his hand and down to his thigh, giving it a squeeze.

I didn’t wait for Harry to respond, because I was already out of my seat with my backpack in hand. I went to walk over to Mrs. Anderson, but all she did was nod and point at the table in the back of the room. I smiled gratefully at her, not at all shocked that she knew what I was going to ask, and made my way back to the desk, the bell ringing as soon as I set down in the spinning chair.

I set my bag on the table and glanced up at Harry and Nicole. My heart, for some unknown reason, was sending really sharp pains throughout my body. It felt like it was cracking, like literally cracking. The pain was unbearable, but if I didn’t want to be the laughing stalk of the school, I needed to keep these tears under control until next period.

But it seemed impossible. No matter how badly I wanted to look away, I couldn’t. My eyes were glued on her hand that was moving up and down Harry’s thigh. I had at least expected Harry to move her hand away when Mrs. Anderson walked up to the front of the class, but all he did was scoot down a little further in his chair and cross his legs over one another on the back of the chair in front of him, which was empty. That resulted in her hand being invisible from the teacher’s point of view, but not mine.

My bottom lip wobbled and I finally closed my eyes to get the image out of my head. I couldn’t take this anymore. Harry could treat me however he wanted to, but he should at least care about me enough to not do things like that in front of me. He was just kissing me yesterday, and it may have just been a kiss to him, but it was my first kiss. The most memorable one, but as of ten minutes ago, i’m not sure I even want to remember the human being known as Harry Styles anymore.

******

**_Harry’s POV:_ **

Oh god, does she ever stop talking? I have been sitting with her for only a few minutes and I want to gouge my eardrums out with a pencil. Her voice is so fucking squeaky and each word she says grates on my already shot nerves. But seriously, how can someone have so much to talk about? How does she not run out of breath?

I roll my eyes as she starts rambling on about some stupid shit I didn’t care about. I really didn’t want to put up with her anymore, but I needed to do this. I knew it would make Louis jealous and I was hoping he would come out of his little comfort bubble and do something about it. I tried to imagine what would happen if he did, but not even my imagination could imagine Louis doing anything to her. He would probably just stay quiet throughout the entire class period and pretend that I am not here, like he always does.

Ah, speaking of the devil and he shows up. Louis walks through the door, his head bowed, and I feel a pulling in my heart, but it is quickly forgotten when I feel small, slim fingers wrap around my arm. I look down at her hand and I have the urge to shake it away but when I glance at Louis from the corner of my eye and see his glare, I decide I would keep it there. And maybe I could at least seem a little bit interested in this conversation.

“Yeah, cool. So, that was you at the party?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer. How the hell could I forget her annoying voice and bright ass red hair that was clearly dyed. I looked over at her and seen her eyes were bright as her lips moved faster than anything I have ever seen move, but I didn’t know she was talking... Even though I had been staring at her lips for a few seconds.

_ Jesus Harry, focus. _

I shaked my head and try to catch onto what she was saying, but I only catch the last few words. “He ended up doing a strip show for everyone.” She said, and i’m guessing it was funny because she laughed, so I joined in with her, even though I have absolutely no idea what the fuck was going on.

I felt a gush of air wash over my side as someone set down, and I didn’t need to look to know who it was. His strawberry scent was already clouding me and making my heart rate increase only the slightest bit. I inhaled deeply and turned in my seat a little, making it so my butt was touching the side of his chair.

I tried, once again, to focus on what she was saying but I honestly couldn’t get passed the lipstick that stained her front teeth. I grimaced and focused on the pencil sharpener, my mind trying to trick itself and make me hear Louis instead of her, and it surprisingly began to work. I imagined it was his raspy, yet soft voice that was saying the words, and I was actually able to enjoy, and participate, in the conversation.

She said something about me being at the party, and I nodded for a second before I stopped and my eyes widened. Shit, Louis didn’t know that I was at the party. I wanted to turn to look at him, to see if he was okay, but I couldn’t. I wasn’t sitting so I could slyly glance at him. If I wanted to, I would have to turn my head completely, and there was no way in hell I was going to make him believe that I cared.

I cleared my throat and turned in my seat a little, sitting like I was before. I didn’t glance at Louis, though. I was afraid that if I did, I would want to tell him that I did nothing with anybody. “Yeah, it was fun. Some girl I met at the grocery store had invited me, and I decided at last minute I would go.” I said quietly, hoping Louis didn’t hear what I was saying.

Yes, of course I knew Louis was listening. He was bloody nosey, and that’s one thing I like about him. He can literally pick something up, out of nothing. He has listened to people talk for so many years, that he can now pick out each and every emotion there is in a person’s voice, even if they don’t know what they are feeling. Well, at least that’s what he told me. Anyway, point is, he is a snoop and likes to listen to what is going on around him, so I know he is listening to our conversation.

Our conversation about the party soon died down and I found the sleeve to my jacket being pulled up, revealing my anchor tattoo. I wanted to tell her to fuck off and to stop pulling at my jacket, but I bit my tongue and glanced down at the tattoo. “This is so cool!” She exclaimed, her fingers brushing over the tattoo.

I nodded and looked up at her, having to keep myself from gagging when I seen her breasts were hanging out of her shirt. It looked like someone squoze a vanilla pudding cup and let it fall over the edges. I shivered at the unsettling thought and clenched my hands into fists, letting them rest on top of my thigh.

Out of curiosity, mostly, I glanced over at Louis and seen how pissed off he looked. I grinned widely, my dimples popping out, and laughed internally because he looked like a pissed off toddler right now. I kept my thoughts to myself and looked back over at what’s her name? Nora? Megan? Nancy? Whatever, she isn’t worth the trouble of trying to remember what the fuck her name is.

I didn’t realize I hadn’t said anything until she pouted, in a way I think she thinks is attractive, and brushed her fingers over my arm. “Maybe I can come over to your house after school today so I can get a good look at all of your tattoos?”

_ Or how about no. _

She slowly began to trail her hand down my arm and towards my thigh. When she reached her destination, she squoze my thigh pretty hard and batted her eyelashes at me. I wanted to slap her hand away and tell her to go clean her fucking teeth, but I clenched my teeth together and forced a smile.

I opened my mouth the respond, but my attention was soon drawn to the now empty seat by me. I frowned and looked back at Louis, seeing he was walking back towards the table Mrs. Anderson had in the back of her room that she usually set at to grade homework or something. I stifled a groan when I seen how fuckable his ass looked right now in those pants that clung to his body in all the right places.

_ The girl, Harry! Focus on the girl. _

I internally growled, but did as my thoughts scream at me and reluctantly turned my gaze back on Strawberry Shortcake. “Listen, that all seems way interesting, but could you just pretend that you are having a great time with me, and maybe you could keep rubbing my thigh?” I asked her, and I tried to keep my voice friendly, but somehow I managed to sound like an asshole.

Blinking a few times, Shortcake--My new permanent nickname for her--looked around the room for a second then nodded, her tiny brain actually being able to understand what I was saying. “You can talk all you want, which we all know you like doing, but I won’t be answering. Okay? Okay.” I forced another smile, then I turned in my seat when the bell rang and situated my legs so Louis could see her hand that was rubbing up and down on my thigh.

The feeling was not at all arousing. I have had to fight vomit back a few times, but each small glance I got at Louis, I knew this was all getting to him. It wasn’t like I wanted to hurt him too badly, I just wanted him to realize that I could pretend he wasn’t even there, which is exactly what he was doing to me. Like I said before, Louis Tomlinson better buckle up because this is only the beginning. I could be an even bigger dick than I was being right now, and I planned on doing so.

_ Maybe then he’ll realize how much he actually needs me. _

  
  
  
  



	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is probably bad, and I apologize. One of my really good friends usually read over the chapters and lets me know if they are worth posting or not, but she is busy today so I just decided to post it. I hope it isn't too bad, and I promise I will post another chapter tonight, one that is a lot better than this one!!
> 
> Oh, and thank all of you for commenting and leaving kudos! It means a lot to me that you are enjoying my story!!! :)

I twirl in my seat in little half circles, my feet actually reaching the ground because I had set the seat a little lower than it originally was. My head was tipped back against the chair as I drummed my fingers on my thigh and focused on the rhythm that didn’t belong to any song I recognized. I watched the ceiling as I moved, the sight soon making me sick, but the sight in front of me was bound to have me puking at any moment.

Nicole’s hand had moved a little more towards Harry’s crotch in the past half and hour and Harry made no attempt to move it, which great. If he want’s to get a fucking stiffy in the middle of english class, then more power to him. Give the poor old teacher a heart attack, and me even more of a reason to cut off his penis and shove it up his ass.

I choked on my saliva at the incredibly violent thought and cleared my throat to cover the noise. I quickly set up straight in my seat and wiped my palms on my joggers, my eyes focusing on Mrs. Anderson who was rambling on about some project we had to do. I didn’t bother listening because I was already finished with the assignment we got today and I could always get the instructions on what we were supposed to be doing for the project after class.

But what the hell was wrong with me? I was not the type to have thoughts like that. Well, except for the time I wanted to cut Lottie’s finger off because she wouldn’t give me the mood ring my dad had bought me for my sixth birthday. I wasn’t too happy then, and the ring proved that fact when I had put it on, after finally getting it back from her, and it instantly went a dark black color.

“This project will be a group one. Two in each group.” Mrs. Anderson said, dragging me out of my thoughts.

I inhaled deeply and watched as everyone began to pair up, including Nicole and Harry. The only reason me, and everyone else in the classroom knew that they were partners, was because Nicole jumped up and was literally screaming Harry’s name. I rolled my eyes and sank back in my seat. Great, another project I would be doing alone.

I sighed deeply and ignored the depressed mood I was just dipped head first in. I hated this, I hated myself. I have been doing good these past few weeks, and I haven’t had an attack or anything, but something as simple as me doing a group project alone sent me spiraling down into my bottomless pit I have grown accustomed to.

“Sit down and listen,” Mrs. Anderson began, and once she had everyone’s attention, she continued. “You will be in groups of boys or girls.” She went on to clarify what she meant, but everyone in the class had already caught onto what she had said and they began to re pick their partners.

Despite every ounce of my body telling me not to, I glanced over at Harry and Nicole. Nicole was pouting as she stood up, her arms crossed over her chest and making her boobs pop out more. I gagged, literally gagged, and watched her turn around to join one of the few girls that were left in the room.

I didn’t see who Harry’s partner was because I was betting it was Cade, one of the very few gay kids that doesn’t shove their sexuality down your throat. I pulled my hood up and leaned back in my chair, my eyes fluttering closed and creating a black barrier that blocked me from all the bullshit going on around me.

I folded my feet up into the chair and twisted my body a little, making the chair turn a little to the right before I turned back to the left. I wad quite content right now with doing nothing. I mean, I was always doing something so being able to just sit back and relax without having to worry about watching my every move was nice.

“Louis??” Someone asked, and I instantly recognized their voice.

“Yeah?” I asked, and forced a smile on my face. I opened my eyes and looked up at Mrs. Anderson, then the person next to her. My smile vanished instantly and was replaced by a frown when I seen the curly haired lad that was towering over me.

_ Oh goodie, Nicole’s sloppy seconds. Or wait, is he my sloppy seconds? _

“You and Harry will be partners for this project.” She informed me with a small smile before she patted my arm and turned around to walk to her desk.

I rolled my eyes and huffed, crossing my arms tightly over my chest. I wasn’t going to talk to him, especially since he could be hiding a boner behind his backpack that he was holding over his crotch. If he was, then he was exaggerating about his junk because I don’t even see a small bump in his backpack.

I felt my cheeks turn a light pink color when I realized I was staring at his crotch. I ducked my head down and picked up my pencil before I opened my notebook to an empty page. As I did that, Harry had decided to make himself comfortable. He grabbed an extra chair from one of the back rows and placed it directly in front of me.

My hand tightened on the pencil when he sat down and a gust of his cologne washed over me. I bit my lip harshly and kept myself from inhaling through my nose like I wanted to. I continued chewing on my bottom lip and I glanced down at my paper, seeing that I had spelt my name wrong and put ‘Lewis’. I groaned quietly and erased the word before I quickly wrote down my name correctly.

I heard Harry sigh as he leaned forward, his fingers tapping on the table. I had full intentions on not talking to him, I did, but with each tap of his fingers I felt myself grow more and more irritated by the noise. “Stop!” I finally blurted. I slammed my pencil down on the table and looked up at him.

His eyes were slightly wide as his fingers were suspended in air, like I had caught him mid tap. He looked shocked for a second, but then he quickly recovered and glared at me, his hand slamming down on the table but with a lot more force than I had used.

“Stop what?” He tilted his head to the side and looked at me, innocence written all over his face.

I growled under my breath because he was anything but innocent, he knew exactly what he was doing. “Nothing.” I finally sighed, because there really was no use in fighting with him. I could use my breath on much more important things than fighting with Harry about something as stupid as this.

“No, what? Tell me what you want me to stop so I can. We don’t want princess Louis upset, now do we?” He asked and I finally felt my anger start to boil over.

“Don’t you have a girlfriend you can go annoy?” I asked and gasped quietly before adding, “And while you’re at it, why don’t you go and get my sandwich crust out of the garbage. I mean, she clearly likes my leftovers.” I smirked and sat back in my seat, relishing in the way he looked right now.

His eyes were wide and his mouth continued to open and close, making him look similar to a fish out of water. I chuckled and shook my head, having no idea where that sudden outburst came from, and stood up from my seat just as the bell rang. I shoved everything into my backpack and pushed past all the students.

That felt good. It felt a lot better than it should have. I know I should feel bad for what I said, but I couldn’t. She may be innocent in other people’s eyes, because she had no idea what was going on with me and Harry, but she was far from innocent to me. What kind of innocent person does what her and Harry were just doing in a room full of students, and an old teacher.

I pushed the thoughts down, because my mood was already shitty enough, and looked up at the full hallway. I haven’t made it too far from the classroom, and I wouldn’t because I was suddenly being pushed against the locker, but a hand on my back stopped me from colliding with the locker to hard.

The hand was large and could easily reach from one of my shoulder blades to the other, and I only knew two people with hands that large. I held my breath and slowly looked up, some of my fear melting away when my eyes made contact with swimming green eyes.

“I wasn’t done talking to you.” Harry growled, his lips curling up at the corners as he snarled loudly.

I gulped loudly and all the courage I may have felt earlier was gone. My knees began to shake and I have yet to breath still, but I didn’t want to. Not while I was still in his presence. “I was done with you.” I rushed out, managing not to breath, and pushed past him.

I walked as fast as I could down the crowded hallway. When I was a safe distance away from him, which was only a few inches, I gulped in a deep breath and pushed down the urge to run into the bathroom so I could finally let the tears, that have been burning my eyes all day, free.

“Louis fucking Tomlinson!” I heard Harry shout loudly from behind me. Almost all of the students in the hallways stopped what they were doing so they could turn and see what was going on, because it wasn’t everyday someone was yelling out  _ /my/  _ name.

I felt my steps falter but I continued walking, it now being a little easier because the students were starting to spread apart, giving me a clear pathway down the hallway. I knew I should stop so that everyone would look away from me, but their gaze wasn’t even bothering me. I could handle all their eyes pinned on me out of curiousity, but I won’t be able to handle Harry and his attitude when he finally catches up to me.

“Don’t fucking push me, because both you and I know I have a little secret.” He said, and that finally had me stopping. I spun around on my heels and glared at Harry who was standing a few feet away from me, his green eyes smoldering.

“What Harry?” I didn’t raise my voice nor use any hand gestures. I was done with all this shit, so why not make that obvious. He wanted to fuck Nicole, then let him, but he doesn't need to rub it in my face like that. And yeah, I shouldn't have said that about her liking my leftovers, but there really was no use in trying to take it back now.

Harry smirked and there was no doubt about it. He was proud. Proud of what? Making half of the school gawk at us, making me fear what he was going to say so I would stop, making it so I didn’t even want to be in his presence anymore? Whatever the reason was, his chest was now puffed out a little and he had his cocky smirk.

“Oh now he want’s to talk.” He said and looked around at the students. He wasn’t looking to get any laughs, but he did, which wasn’t surprising because people always seemed to be laughing at me.

I felt my chest twist in pain and I couldn’t take this anymore. He could tell the student’s what he wanted, no matter if it was about me and him or about the small view he has seen into his past. I felt tears blur my vision as I looked around at all the students whose laughs haunt my dreams, reminding me I would be nothing more than the joke.

I looked up at Harry and we made eye contact for a brief moment before I turned around and walked down the hallway. The student’s were now moving to block my pathway, but I somehow managed to squeeze past all of them. Their laughs continued to ricochet in my head, but I didn’t let one single tear fall. I knew I should. I knew I deserved a good cry, but not right now. Not when I had people’s grubby fingers all over me, pushing me in one way, then another. They didn’t deserve the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

I had to lift a hand up to my glasses to keep them from falling as I pushed my way past the suffocating walls of people that grew closer and closer to me until it got to the point I felt like dropping to my knees and burying my head in my knees. My chest began to grow tighter and panic set in when I realized there was no escape past all these people. I was stuck here until the bell rang.

I looked blindly around at all the faces laughing at me, and I could feel as a cold clamp began to squeeze around my chest, tightening with each forced breath I took in. I couldn’t breath, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t do anything but stand helplessly as the waves crashed over my body, dragging me further and further into the endless pool until someone, hopefully, pulled me out.

My vision began to go out and my head began to swim, but I faintly felt a rough, large hand curl around my upper arm. I didn’t know where I was being drug, but I slowly began to feel the clamp ease from around my chest. My eyes were screwed shut as we walked, afraid that if I were to open them I would come face to face with one of my worst nightmares.

I didn’t realize it but the laughing had stopped and I was cocooned by quietness, but there was someone else in the room with me. I wouldn’t realize that until I opened my eyes after minutes passed by with me trying to calm down by taking large, deep breaths through my mouth. I had always tried to breath through my nose in times like these, but it always made the panic grow stronger because I never seemed to get enough air in through my nose.

When the pressure on my chest finally lifted and my stomach was no longer in painful knots, I blew out a soft breath and slowly opened my eyes. I was pressed against a wall in the female’s bathroom that was closed off right now, and there were hands holding onto each of my shoulders, holding me up. One deep breath through my nose and I knew exactly who was standing in front of me, who had saved me from the crowded hallway.

“Thanks.” I mumbled quietly, even though I felt disappointed. I took my glasses off and wiped the tears off my cheeks that I didn’t realize had fallen, then I put them back on and hefted my backpack further up onto my shoulder, making the other person drop their hand.

“Are you okay?” They asked quietly and took a step back, putting a little distance between us. I was no longer breathing in their scent anymore, and I was honestly grateful for that. It wasn’t like I wasn’t used to the scent, I was just so upset right now that it gave me a headache.

I nodded and without another word, I shimmied my way past the person and walked out of the door when I heard the final bell ring, the one that signaled class was beginning. “I’ll see you in class.” I said over my shoulder, my voice sounding oddly high pitched right now. I cleared my throat and, with heavy legs, I made my way down the hallway, leaving Jen standing alone in the bathroom looking both confused and worried.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know I said I would update last night but I ended up going to my sister's for the night and didn't have time, but here you are!!! :)

**_Harry’s POV:_ **

I paced the small classroom, my long, bony fingers threading through my messy mop of curls. I tugged on it harshly, hissing as I pulled out pieces of hair with the silver band on my middle finger that had HS as the engravings. I chewed at the loose skin on my bottom lip and breathed deeply through my nose, my mind racing with images of Louis standing in the hall, his blue eyes glossy with tears and a look of terror plastered on his face.

The sight would haunt me for the rest of my life because it was me that caused that look, it was me who had all the student’s laughing at him, it was me who completely crushed him all because I was being a dick. I thought it would be funny to treat him like I treated the student’s at my old school because he had  _ hurt  _ me. I wasn’t the type of person to get hurt but when he didn’t say anything about the kiss, I felt nothing but hurt blossom in my chest.

I shook my head clear of all thoughts of me. I wasn’t worried about how I felt, but about how Louis felt. I had walked forward to pull him out of the hallway after I realized what I had done, but the student’s were blocking my way, denying me the chance to pull the hyperventilating boy out of their circle of idgits. And when I finally did push half the people out of the way, he was gone. I knew he didn’t get out himself because these bloody leeches were strong, and he wouldn’t have been able to push past them on his own.

So the first thought that ran through my head was Seth. I ran through that school faster than I have ever ran and when I reached the door that looked out on the football field, I felt relief wash over me. Seth had been standing in the middle of a circle, probably giving off game plans and a bunch of other shit.

I had turned around and searched every inch of that school after that, except for Jen’s room. I couldn’t believe I had been so stupid I didn’t check the classroom that he spent almost all of his free time in, but when I reached it, it was empty. Jen wasn’t even here. Paperwork was scattered across her desk and her chair was cold when I had felt it, which led me to pacing the room.

I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I didn’t head someone enter the room, nor did I hear them sit down in the chair. What finally drug me out of my thoughts was when I heard fingers typing away on a keyboard. I spun around and seen Jen was sitting at her desk, her cold gaze pinned on her computer as she typed angrily on her keyboard.

“Where’s Louis?” I asked, and it came out as frantic as I felt. Surely Jen would know where he was, but then again she might not tell me because she might know that I was the one who had caused him to have whatever that was.

“In the library.” She said, not taking her eyes off the computer. Her fingers picked up speed and they were practically slamming against the keyboard with each letter she typed.

“There’s a library?” How the fuck did I not know this. I thought that this school didn’t even bother to have put in a library because there students all had their own laptops and books and shit.

_ Of course they have a library, you donk. _

I was about to ask her where it was, but a memory of me dragging Louis towards the faculty room popped into mind. I closed my eyes and thought back to it, a blurry sign above a door that read ‘Library’ popping into mind. I mumbled a quick thank you, then ran out of the classroom and down the hallway, taking a left then another left.

I came to an abrupt halt in front of the glass doors. My eyes searched the room for the familiar head, but I couldn’t spot him. I was about to turn around and go look somewhere else, but a piece of chestnut hair sticking out of a bean bag chair in the far corner of the library caught my eye.

As quietly as I could, I opened the door and walked into the room. I maneuvered past the couches that were placed by the librarian's desk, then I walked past the tables and was almost to him when I bumped my hip on the corner of a shelf. I hissed loudly and caressed it, the sharp ache distracting my mind for a minute.

I didn’t realize I had hissed as loud as I did until a chorus of ‘Shh’s’ filled the library. I looked around at all the nerds and rolled my eyes, ignoring all their glares. I kept a hand on my aching him and walked forward before I plopped down in the green bean bag that was next to Louis. It was not comfortable at all. I mirrored Louis’ body, so my knees were squashed up and almost touching my chest and my arms were wrapped around them.

I situated myself for a second, stopping when I finally managed to get in a position that was at least a little comfortable, and looked over at Louis. His eyes were closed and his head was resting against his knees. He had white headphones in and if I listened closely, I could hear Sleeping with Sirens blaring, the song being ‘Roger Rabbit.’ His backpack was lying at his feet and in the sleeve on the black back his glasses were sticking out, the frame matching the bag so it was hard to pick them out but the white glass helped.

A piece of hair was sticking up, making him look like Alfalfa, and I wanted to point that out but then I remembered why I was here in the first place. I sighed and rubbed my palms together, then laced my fingers together and pressed them against my knees. I bit my lip and against my better judgment, I leaned forward and gently poked his arm.

His eyes instantly popped open, and I gasped quietly when I seen his eyes were a lighter blue, mirroring the bluish-steel of a midwinter sky. I was knocked not only breathless, but speechless too. His eyes were bloodshot and they were still glossy, making them look cold and shimmering, but stunning at the same time.

I inhaled deeply and even though I knew I shouldn’t, I held eye contact with him. His eyes were swimming with many different emotions, but as I stared longer, I could see his eyes were screaming with hurt, humiliation, and betrayal. I had gained his trust, and then betrayed him. How the fuck could I do this?

_ All because I am a huge fucking prick. _

“Lou.” I mouthed quietly, because I knew he wouldn’t be able to hear me with the headphones that were still blaring music. He didn’t move or look away, so I was hoping that was a good sign, but just as that thought crossed my mind, I was being slapped across the cheek.

I blinked a few times and tried to process what had just happened, but my stinging cheek gave me a pretty good idea. My hands fell down to my sides and I clenched them into fists and I could feel as a growl was building up my throat, but I quickly took a deep breath in and calmed myself down as best as I could because he wasn’t a threat, he was  _ Louis. _

“I deserved that.” I said, my fingers gently gliding over my skin that was burning. Even though he had slapped me, my eyes never strayed from his. I held eye contact with him, blood shot blue eyes locked with wide green eyes.

With shaky hands, he lifted a hand up to his ear and pulled out one headphone, then the other, letting the white buds rest in his lap. “What do you want?” His voice was quiet, but raspy from crying.

I felt a pang of regret strike through my body and pierce my heart. I caused him to look like this, to look so broken, to  _ feel _ broken. “I’m sorry.” I whispered, and words more sincere have never left my mouth.

I was sorry. I was sorry I have caused him so much shit and hurt him. I’m sorry that I got kicked out of my last school and got sent here. I’m sorry he was forced to tutor me, to talk to me, to even be around me. I was sorry for even existing in his life.

“I don’t care, just leave me alone.” Fresh tears began to build up in his eyes and my mind was screaming at me, telling me to do something so they wouldn’t fall, telling me to help the boy I just humiliated in front of half of the school.

“Can we just talk, please?”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” He whispered, and a lone tear slipped past his eye and trailed down his cheek, leaving a wet line in it’s wake.

He stood up from the bean bag in one fluid movement and grabbed his bag, then began to walk through the many aisles of shelves that were stacked full of books, but I wasn’t going to just let him walk away again. I climbed to my feet, having a little bit of difficulty, and followed after him.

It took a minute for me to find him in this maze, but I finally did. He was standing in the section of history books, and his fingers were lightly touching the binding of a thick book. “I can’t just leave you alone after what I did.” I said, leaning against one of the shelves. My shoulder pushed some of the books back, but the shelf they were on was sturdy enough to hold my weight so it didn’t even sway.

“You can, and you will.” He said without looking at me. His small, thin fingers wrapped around the book and he pulled it out. I was surprised to see how thick it was. It looked to be at least five hundred pages, if not more. It was definitely a book I wouldn’t even attempt to read.

“Will you just listen to me? Let me explain myself.” I took a step forward, the tip of my black shoe nudging against his white shoe. I wasn’t going to just let him walk away thinking that I hated him. I needed to explain myself, or at least attempt to.

When he didn’t say anything, or make any sign that he was going to move, I sighed deeply closed my eyes for a brief second. “I didn’t mean for that to happen in the hallway. I just wanted to talk to you and you were being so damn frustrating. I didn’t know how to stop you without sounding like a dick, so I just said whatever came to mind and I guess my mind is made up of a bunch of stupid shit.” I paused and opened my eyes, seeing he was still standing, his blue eyes focused on the book he had in his hands. But his head was tilted towards me, letting me know he was listening.

“I am a dick. It’s all I know how to be and sometimes I forget there are good guys in the world, guys like you. In my entire life I have never met someone like you, so it’s refreshing to have someone not look at me like they used to, someone who doesn’t judge me for the way I am.” I paused because I was going off track, way off track, and I was rambling.

Sighing, I pinched the bridge of my nose and thought about what I could say to explain my earlier behavior, but my mind was blank. “I’m sorry for being like this to you the day after your first kiss.” I said quietly, and at the mention of the kiss, Louis went completely stiff.

“Yeah, well I don’t care. It was just a kiss. That’s all it was, nothing more.” He said, and he sounded like he was trying to convince himself of that, rather than me. “Go find your girlfriend and kiss her.” He added as an afterthought and with one last lingering gaze at me, he turned so his back was facing me and began to walk away.

I growled and out of impulse, I wrapped my fingers around his arm and jerked him backwards. His back collided with my chest, but I quickly spun him around and pinned him against the shelf, making one of the books on the shelf fall to the ground with a loud thud. I let go of his arm and lifted it up to his neck, my thumb brushing along the underside of his jaw as I stared at him in the eyes.

“I don’t have a girlfriend.” I growled, but kept my voice down low enough that so we wouldn’t get in trouble. Why the fuck would he think tha Nicole was my girlfriend?

Because you wanted him to, ass.

“Let me go, Harry.” He said sternly, but his eyes were saying something completely different. 

A small smile tugged at my lips when he inhaled deeply through his nose, causing some of the tension to leave his body. I licked my bottom lip and without asking him permission, I leaned down and pressed my lips against his. It wasn’t slow or timid like the first one. This one was heated, both of us getting out our frustrations with each other through kissing.

I curled my hand tighter around the side of Louis’ neck and jaw and deepened the kiss, my lips skillfully moving over his. Louis melted into the kiss, his body going completely limp but mine, which was pressed against his, was making it so he didn’t fall to the ground. Much like the first time, my eyes, that closed at some point in time, had fireworks exploding behind them, lighting up the darkness.

All too suddenly, Louis pulled back, making me open my eyes, and gasped a deep breath in, his cherry flavored lips parting slightly. His eyes were still closed, his long eyelashes fanning out across his pale cheeks that had a light pink tint to them.

Slowly, Louis let his eyes flutter open. He stared at me for a second, and I stared back at him. But his eyes would occasionally flicker between my eyes, down to my burning plump lips that now tasted like his chapstick.

“Harry.” He whispered quietly, but his words were full of wonder and they did something odd to my heart. A small V formed between his eyebrows, but it was soon gone and a small smile was stretching his lips, making large ass bats flap around in my stomach.

“Louis” I said just as quiet, my fingers playing with the hair at the back of his neck. With my other hand, I slowly pushed up his glasses, then I brushed the hair out of his face and off to the side.

He went to say something, but a voice stopped him. “FAGS!!” A familiar voice yelled, and at the same time, both mine and Louis’ heads snapped in the direction of the voice. Seth stood at the end of the aisle with his arms crossed over his chest and a scowl on his face. And just like that, our little bubble was burst and I was pushing Louis behind me.

 


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I am a day late on updating, but my brother ended up closing out of my tab that had the chapter I was supposed to update yesterday, and I didn't have time to rewrite it until today. *Sigh* Oh, and I know this chapter isn't the best, and I apologize for it, but I wanted to update for all of you!! Anywho, I hope you all have a good day and I'll update as soon as possible!!!

My head was spinning, my heart was beating fast, each thump hitting against my rib cage, and my stomach felt like it was twisting in on itself… And I was kinda freaking out. Was this normal? I mean, the first time Harry had kissed me something similar to this happened, but not as bad. I wanted to ask Harry if is was normal too, but a voice that has sent fear down my spin more times than I can count stopped me.

At the insulting word that has been thrown at me my entire life, I felt that same tingle of fear run down my spin and make me freeze on the spot. I wanted to run and hide, to block out any of the offensive words I knew he was going to say, but a hand on my arm stopped me from cowering back.

I looked up at Harry, but the only view I had of him was the back of his head, me somehow ending up behind him. His hand was no longer on my arm, and as much as I missed the feeling, I didn’t dare speak right now. He was no longer the calm, self controlled Harry that I had just kissed a few seconds ago. No. He was now in predator mode. His hands were in fists, making the veins in his arms pop out, and his body was shaking from the anger that has already started to consume him.

I wanted to reach forward and grab his arm to try and calm him down, to tell him Seth wasn’t worth it, but at the same time I didn’t. I wanted to see Seth cower in fear, to see him feel exactly how he has made me feel all these years. I wanted him to get a dose of his own medicine, and luckily for me, Harry was more than willing to be the one who gave it to him.

I peeked my head around Harry’s arm and watched as Seth flinched at whatever Harry had said, but I wasn’t able to hear it past the ringing in my ears. Slowly, I reached a hand forward and gently grabbed ahold of Harry’s forearm, my finger’s not being able to wrap all the way around it. At the contact, Harry went stiff for a second but he must of remembered who was behind him because his body loosened a little.

“Harry, please don’t.” I whispered, going back on my previous thoughts. I may want Seth to get hurt, but I didn’t want Harry to get in trouble.

“Louis, please let go of my arm. I don’t want to hurt you.” Harry said, and even though his voice was calm, you could hear how forced his words were. He was trying not to scare me, but his attempt was unneeded. I wasn’t afraid of Harry, well at least I wasn’t right now. He wouldn’t hurt me, and I knew that for a fact.

“Listen to your faggy boyfriend, Styles.” Seth said, and before any of us could react, a gust of wind was washing over me and Harry was already standing in front of Seth, his hand gripping the front of his shirt.

I felt my heart jump in my throat, closing it off and making it impossible to breath. Harry lifted a hand up and clenched it into a fist. He brought it back and I squeaked loudly when I seen him swing forward. I wanted to close my eyes, I didn’t want to see the violence that was about to unfold in front of me, but I couldn’t, and I didn’t need to.

Harry’s fingers brushed against Seth’s jaw, but that’s it. He had stopped his hand just in time, making it so he didn’t hit him. “You’re not worth my fucking time.” Harry spat before he let go of the white shirt.

“You’re---” Seth began, but quickly bit his tongue when a fragile old woman came walking out of one of the shelves.

“Louis, dear, tell your friends to be quiet.” Mrs. Meyers said, who was been the librarian at this school for over twenty years. Her wrinkly hand shook violently when she lifted it up to fix her glasses that rested loosely on her nose, a metal string dangling around her neck that was attached to them.

She squinted her eyes and looked from me, to Harry, then to Seth. She smiled widely when she seen the tall blonde jock standing just behind Harry. “Seth! I was just looking for you. Your father sent me over the list of books you need and I gathered them up.” Her voice was slow and it wavered, but when she finally finished, she gestured for Seth to follow her. Ater grumbling some nonsense to Harry, Seth hit him harshly with his shoulder when he walked past him.

Harry growled under his breath and went to take a step forward, but my face must have been something that he didn’t like because right after he glanced at me, he took a step back and closed his eyes before he inhaled deeply. “Fucking prick needs to get laid.” Harry mumbled under his breath before he opened his eyes and forced a smile when he looked at me.

I returned the smile, even though it was a little forced, and grabbed my book off the floor. I held it tightly in my arms and hefted my backpack further up on my shoulder. “Let’s go?” I asked Harry, keeping my gaze on the floor.

Nodding, Harry went to grab my hand but he hesitated for a second, then finally let his hand rest on the small of my back. I didn’t say anything. I kept quiet and let him lead me out of the library, then down the hallway. My muscles jumped under his touch, but I doubt he could feel it through the material of my hoodie. Well, I was hoping he couldn’t.

Sighing when we finally came to a stop, I glanced up and seen we were standing in front of the front doors to the school. My eyes danced over the grass that was once again covered by snow, though it was the light powdery snow that would be gone within a few days. It sparkled in the sunlight and if you stared at one spot for too long, your eyes began to hurt and your vision would go black.

I bit my lip and wrapped my arms tighter around my torso, the book squishing against my stomach painfully, and nodded my head a little, already knowing what he was silently asking. At my answer, Harry opened the door for me and I walked out, then he followed after me. I carefully stepped down the slippery steps, but my cautious steps weren’t as cautious as I thought because I was soon slipping.

It seemed like it happened in slow motion as I dropped my book and my arms flailed for second before I began to grasp at nothing. The air slipped between my fingers like water does when you try to cup it in your hands, and when I realized I was going to fall on my ass, I screwed my eyes shut and was hoping I wouldn’t crack my head open on the cement.

Much to my dismay, I felt my ass come in contact with the icy stairs, but instead of stumbling down them, I stayed in one spot. My ass began to throb and sharp pains shot through out it, and after a few seconds, I finally opened my eyes.

Harry was standing in front of me, his arms clutching his stomach as he wheezed from laughter. I wanted to shove a sock down his throat, but instead, I leaned over the side railing and scooped up a handful of snow and threw it at him. It hit him right in the middle of his head and clung to his hair. Instead of sitting and waiting for him to leap at me, I quickly scurried to my feet and began to run as fast as the slippery sidewalk would allow me.

I didn’t care that I had left my backpack behind, nor did I care that the library’s book was getting ruined as water seeped into the pages and blurred the words. All that was on my mind right now was trying to get my legs to move as fast as I could so I would get away from the giant that was bound to chase after me.

I chanced a glance behind my shoulder and seen Harry ever so calmly bend down to gather up to hand fulls of snow, then he stood up and looked me right in the eyes. My breath hitched in my throat. Jesus, he was really fucking hot.

_ You’re running away from that hot god! _

The thought ricocheted around my head and I shook it out before I turned back around to look where I was going. It was just in time too, because I was only a few feet away from running into a tree. I dodged it, luckily, and began to run towards the long strip of snow covered grass that was by the road.

Above my heavy panting and my feet crunching in the snow, I could hear slow, calm footsteps behind me, letting me know he wasn’t even close to catching up to me, but he was still coming after me. I felt my legs start to go numb and my stomach cramp uncomfortably. I slowed down just a little before I came to a fast jog.

I panted loudly, my lungs screaming in pain, and looked over at Harry who was smirking at me. With each step I took forward, he seemed to grow feet closer to me until I finally felt an arm wrap around my waist. I was being hauled backwards, then my hair was being covered in snow. I squealed loudly and fought against Harry’s hold on me, but all that resulted in was Harry falling backwards and me landing on top of him.

I laughed breathlessly and went to roll over onto my side, but Harry grabbed a hold of my wrist. “Turn over.” He whispered, sounding just as breathless as me. I did as he said, though I was a little confused, and looked down at him. My clothes had managed not to get wet because I had landed on Harry, but my fringe was now sticking to my forehead and my knees and shins were starting to get wet from me kneeling in the snow.

“My ass it wet.” He informed me, and just as I opened my mouth to laugh, something was being pressed against my lips. At first I thought it was Harry’s lips, but then it began to melt and my face began to go numb from the coldness.

“Harry!” I screeched and spit out the snow that had went into my mouth. I blindly grabbed some snow and wiped it across his face, then I stood up and used my sleeve to wipe the snow off of my face.

“Ass.” He rolled onto his side and wiped the snow off of his face.

“I gotta ass.” I said and popped out my hip. I gave him one more glance before I began to walk back to the stairs, my hips swaying all the while.

I smiled softly to myself as I walked back to the stairs to get my stuff. From my knees down may be wet, and my hair may be sticking to my forehead, but I wasn’t mad. I was the complete opposite, actually. I was happy, and it was a weird feeling. I wasn’t used to smiling or being happy, but that’s all i’ve really been these past few months.

_ All thanks to the supposed badass behind me. _

**_~~~~_ **

Harry had dropped me off at home after our little, very little, snow fight at the school. My house had been empty because both my mom and Lottie had things to do today. Well, my mom had to go get more alcohol, and Lottie had been with her dealer to get more weed. 

I took a shower once I was home, and by the time I was out and dressed in an oversized sweatshirt and sweatpants, Lottie was home. I was just towel drying my hair when she knocked on the door before she came in.

“Sit down.” She instructed me once she was in my room and the door was closed. I eyed her for a second, but grabbed the comb off of my dresser and sat down on my bed. I crossed my legs over one another and began to brush my hair, my eyes closing but I felt when Lottie set down on the bed beside me.

I heard a plastic bag rustling, and I figured it was pot so I quickly finished brushing through my hair. I brushed my hair off to the side of my head, threw my comb by my feet, then looked up at Lottie. She fished her hand into the bag between her legs, then she shoved something brown at me and waved it in front of my face.

I inhaled deeply, like she wanted me to, and my eyes widened when I smelt the brownie. It reeked of weed, and it made my mouth literally water. “Where did you get this?” I asked her and carefully, I took the large square out of her hand and I laid it flat on my palm. It was so large that it covered my entire hand and hung over the edges.

The brown, chocolate heaven was still warm, but not warm enough to burn my hand. “I got these beauties from Zayn. He gave me three for only twenty dollars.” She said, and I glanced up in time to see the faint blush on her cheeks. That blush was all I needed to know that these weren’t only $20, but she also paid in another way.

I pursed my lips and nodded, but didn’t comment. I was used to Lottie sleeping with people to get stuff she wanted or needed, so this wasn’t really a shocker. I internally sighed and decided that I needed to shut off my brain for a while. I lifted the brownie up to my lips and even though I knew I needed only a few small bites to get me high, I took a large bite and chewed it.

It practically melted on my tongue and when I swallowed it, it coated my throat and I could already feel myself starting to get high, but I wanted more. Ignoring Lottie’s warnings, I quickly ate a little less than half the brownie before I handed it to her and laid back on my bed. I was starting to get a small high, but it wasn’t anything too strong.

“These things are…” I was cut off when a sudden burst of whatever ran through my body. I suddenly felt like I was on a roller coaster that had sharp turns. “Oh fuck.” I gasped, my eyes screwing shut when the ceiling began to come to life and showing what I was thinking about, which was Harry.

I heard Lottie laugh before she stood up. She laid the rest of the brownie on my chest and said something, but I couldn’t hear it past the wind blowing loudly in my ears, then she left.

This high was different than all my other highs. I had thought that my mind would shut off like every other time, but it didn’t. All my thoughts only intensified and I felt myself growing more and more aroused by the second.

All I could hear was Harry whispering things to me, things he had never actually said to me but I have imagined him say plenty of times. ‘Be a good boy for me, Louis. Touch yourself.’ I wanted to listen to these thoughts, I wanted to reach down my pants and do what Harry wanted me to because I wanted to be a good boy. But this wasn’t real. A small voice in the back of my mind reminded me of that, but it also reminded me of my throbbing cock that was confined by my tight sweatpants.

I shook my head and I sat up in my bed right as my phone began to ring. The brownie fell onto my lap, but I didn’t pick it up. I left it sitting on my right leg, the now cool brownie sticking to my pants. I leaned over, my eyes still closed, and grabbed my phone from the end of my bed. Without opening my eyes, I pressed the power button and lifted it up to my ear.

“Hello?” I breathed out. My free hand inched towards my penis, but just as it was about to reach it, I quickly pulled it back and clenched it into a fist.

“Having some hardcore sex?” Harry asked, and I yelped in surprise because, what the hell? I went to throw my phone, but my body seemed to be frozen in place. My eyes snapped open and I stared out the window, trying to see if anybody could see through it but my curtains were pulled closed.

“What are you talking about?” I asked him. I swung my legs over the bed and was going to stand up, but the world began to spin so I set back down on my bed and grabbed the brownie from behind me. I eyed it for a second, then I set it down on my nightstand table.

“Nothing, I was joking. But…” He paused for a second, and me knowing Harry, I could hear the smile he was wearing. “I am outside your bedroom door.” He finished, and then there was a knock on my bedroom door.

I threw my phone down on my bed and I stood up to my feet, but I had to grasp my dresser to keep myself from falling. Once I regained my balance, I fixed my now half hard on and slowly made my way towards to door, having to use the wall to hold me up. When I reached the door, I inhaled deeply and threw it open, coming face to face with a smirking green eyed lad who was holding a thick history book in his arms.

_ Well, shit.  _


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, so this chapter is probably the worst on I have ever written, but a few of you guys suggested for me to write something along the lines of this, so I did. So, because this chapter isn't that great, I will most likely be updating later today! I hope you all enjoy this!! :)
> 
> Oh, and this chapter isn't proof read, so I apologize for any mistakes there may be!

Ever had one of those moments where you wanted to rewind the next five minutes? Yeah, well thats me right now. Here I stand, open mouthed, tented sweatpants and bloodshot eyes with hair sticking all over the place, and standing in front of me was the last person I wanted to see. He had changed since the last time I seen him, and dear god it was doing something to me.

He was wearing black joggers that clung to his legs and showed the obvious bulge in his trousers, though he wasn’t hard. He had on a white shirt that stretched perfectly over his biceps and framed his slim, yet muscular torso and chest. My wide eyes raked over his body, and even though I could feel my sweatpants becoming tighter with each patch of visible skin I seen, I couldn’t tear my eyes off of him.

“Yeah, you can have fun gawking at me but I am going to go sit on your bed.” Harry said, and I couldn’t decipher the words in my jumbled mind until Harry was already brushing past me and sitting on my bed.

_ Oh fuck, no! _

I wanted to tell him to leave, to tell him to get away from me and my insanity as fast as he possibly could, but I was selfish and didn’t. I turned around slowly, using the wall to help keep my balance, and pinned my glazed blue eyes on Harry. He was sitting on my old, worn out bed, his eyes taking in all of my small, yet neat bedroom.

He looked so out of place in here, in my bedroom that was probably the size of his closet, or possibly smaller. He was used to so much more than what I had here, but he didn’t say anything about my obvious lack of money, and he chose to stick around with me even though he  _ knew  _ I wasn’t born from money.

“H-Hi.” I stuttered, the words I wanted to say when I seen him standing in my doorway just now coming out. I internally kicked myself because of course I had to be higher than a fucking kite when Harry came to my hell hole of a house for the first time.

Smiling a soft, warm smile, Harry looked up at me and gently patted the spot next to him, but in my current state, it didn’t even look like he had touched the mattress. I bowed my head and stumbled over to my bed, though I managed to not hit into Harry when I sat down on my bed. I let my short legs dangle over the edge and I folded my hands in my lap, my eyes landing on the pot brownie that was on my nightstand table. I was hoping Harry wouldn’t notice, and so far, he hasn’t.

“So.” Harry said, and he drug out the ‘o’ in said. I inhaled deeply and turned my gaze up to him, my face falling into a cheesy ass grin when I seen how adorable he looked right now. His curls were loose, like always, but he had one small curl that had escaped from the rest and it was tumbling down his forehead and resting on the side of his cheek. I wanted to reach up and touch it to see if it was as soft as it looked, and somehow, even in my not-so-myself state of mind, I managed to refrain from doing so.

“Oops.” Harry said when his knee nudged against mine and I almost fell backwards. I giggled loudly and grabbed ahold of his arm, my bright eyes locking with his.

“Hi.” I murmured again, that seeming to be the only word I knew at the moment. Harry laughed and shook his head, then he looked down at where my small hand was wrapped around his thick arm.

“You’re in a good mood.” He commented, his arm flexing under my touch when he clenched his hand into a fist. And, if i’m not mistaken, I swear I seen his eyes float over to the brownie on my nightstand before they moved back over to me.

I tried to think of an excuse to tell him for the brownie, but I honestly couldn’t think of one. Besides, Harry isn’t the most perfect human being so who the hell is he to judge me? “It’s a pot brownie.” I informed him before I leaned over and grabbed the brownie. I was unsteady the entire time, but my arm on Harry kept me from falling forward.

“Want some?” I asked, and I shoved the brownie in his face much like Lottie did to me. Harry’s lip twitched a little and he peeked at me from the corner of his eyes before he opened his mouth wide and ate over half of the brownie in one bite.

My eyes widened, though not very much because of how high I was, and when I pulled the brownie back, I looked at how big his mouth had actually been able to open. I tried to mirror it, but I only managed to get it open half as wide as he did. I looked back up at him and watched, transfixed on the way his lips looked as he chewed. Slowly, I leaned forward and brushed the piece of a crumb off the corner of his lip, then I wiped my hand off on my blanket.

When he finished chewing, I lifted the brownie back up to his lips, which my gaze has never left. Harry pursed his lips for a second, then he took the brownie from me and finished it in just one bite. “You have a big mouth.” I said and giggled.

Sighing, I laid back on my bed and folded my free arm behind my head. I kept my other hand on Harry’s arm and soon enough, Harry was leaning back and mirroring my body. My hand got moved when he moved, so now it rested on his bony wrist. Instead of moving my hand like I feared Harry wanted me to, I just wrapped my thin fingers around it and ran my thumb along the back of his hand.

We just laid there, me staring at the ceiling while Harry stared at wherever he wanted to, though I had a small feeling that he was staring at  _ me.  _ Seconds, minutes, or even hours could have passed before Harry finally did what I was too scared to do, but wanted more than anything.

He didn’t warn me before he swung one of his legs over my body, then pulled himself up so he was straddling me. He didn’t warn me before he gently caressed my cheek, me subconsciously nuzzling into his hand, and he didn’t warn me before he leaned down and connected his lips with mine in a soft, yet heated kiss.

Unlike the first kiss, or even the second kiss, I wasn’t frozen on the spot. I was so completely relaxed and comfortable with myself right now, that I was able to kiss him back. I was able to move my lips against his, and slide my tongue across his bottom lip.  _ I was able to  _ allow him access to my mouth, to let him explore the small space that nobody has ever explored before.

But I shouldn’t have allowed him to, because only a few short minutes later, I felt the problem in my sweatpants return. The way his tongue felt massaging mine and running across the inside of my cheeks was too much for me too handle, and the proof was hiding just under Harry, waiting for him to move even a fraction of an inch before his ass got poked and I couldn’t even joke and say something like ‘That’s not my flashlight’ because that, quite frankly, is beyond embarrassing.

I broke the kiss, reluctantly, and turned my head to the side so Harry’s rough, yet soft, plump lips brushed against my cheek before he pulled back. “What’s wrong?” He asked, his voice thick and raspy, which wasn’t helping my case at all.

“I… Erm… Have a problem.” I whispered, cringing when I heard how raspy  _ my  _ voice sounded. I honestly didn’t recognize it as my own voice at first, but the rumble in my chest and the scratchiness of my throat as I spoke let me know it was indeed me.

I wiggled my hips and with a dark blush warming my face, I lifted my hips up a little and watched in utter embarrassment as Harry scrunched his face up in confusion, before his mouth fell into an ‘o’ when he realized what it was. Tilting his head to the side with a light smirk tugging at his lips, Harry pushed his hips down and watched in satisfaction as my face scrunched up in pleasure. I bit my lip harshly to keep from moaning, and out of mortification, I grabbed my pillow from the top of the bed and covered my face with it, refusing to let him see me or vice versa.

“I-I think you should go.” I stuttered out, my words being muffled from the pillow that was practically suffocating me. I had no idea why I was this embarrassed, to be honest. Harry was a male too, a male who knew how uncontrollable an erection was, but it was still embarrassing to have one in front of a male for the first time in your entire life.

“Whatever. I’ll be here to pick you up tomorrow. You better be ready.” He said, and with one final squeeze to my shoulder, Harry climbed out of the bed and walked out of my room. I listened closely and heard as he walked down the creaky stairs quietly, then opened the squeaky door and closed it softly. When I heard the quiet purr of his engine and his tires squeal against the asphalt, I finally let out a deep breath I hadn’t realized I was holding.

“Bloody fucking hell.” I growled and stood up from my bed. I grabbed my towel off of my floor by my bedroom door and I stripped from my clothes as quickly as I could, being cautious of my throbbing penis, and wrapped the towel around my waist. I tried to cover the obvious tent as I walked out of my bedroom and down the hallway, to the bathroom with cracks in the ceiling.

The only way I was going to get rid of this bloody thing was to take a cold ass shower, and that’s what I planned on doing, even if it did kill my already dwindling high. I turned the water on, to as cold as it would go, and locked the door before I took the towel off and stepped into the shower. It was a quick shower, considering I have already took one today, but no matter how cold the water was or how hard I tried to think of something other than the way Harry’s tongue felt in my mouth, my bloody boner wouldn’t go away.

**_~~~~~_ **

True to his word, like always, Harry picked me up the next day. The car ride to school was filled with Harry singing at the top of his lungs to some random song on the radio, and me giggling the entire time. When we had reached the school, Harry had opened the car door for me and held my hand while we walked up the stairs and into the packed hallways.

I had expected him to drop my hand when a few people pointed in our direction, a few of them commenting on it, but he only sqouze my small hand tighter in his larger hand and said something just as rude to the people who decided they needed to comment on something that bothered them in no way whatsoever.

Both of our backpacks were slung over his shoulder, because he insisted he carried mine because it was ridiculous how heavy it was, and I had the ruined library book tucked safely under my other arm. The people in the hallway separated for us as we walked down it, and I couldn’t help but feel pride when I seen how shocked half of them looked.

_ Ha, dick breaths. Looks like half of you owe people a lot of money. _

The smug smile I had worn didn't leave my face, even when Seth glared daggers at me and Harry when we walked past him and his group of dicks. Harry being Harry ended up flipping them off over his shoulder, and did nothing but laugh when they yelled at both of us and called us fags. I tried to have a light mood like Harry, but when they called us that, on top of all the people staring, my panic had started to grow and Harry soon realized that.

By the time we were in the hallway Jen’s classroom was in, my fingernails were digging into Harry’s hand and I was curled up at his side, only half of my body being visible. I had tried to keep calm and act like none of this bothered me, but the truth was, I wasn’t okay with any of this. I mean, I was used to getting called names, but I wasn’t used to dragging someone down with me.

Harry actually had a chance at being someone in this school. I mean, he earned the school’s badass title only a short while after he got here, and he literally had people fawning over him. That was up until he started to hang out with me. Now, people call him names like ‘Faggy Styles’ or ‘Nerd fucker’, or just random names that has something to do with him talking to me.

I wanted to push Harry away, because I still wasn’t sure if him willingly talking to me isn’t just a drawn out prank that the jock’s put him up to. I had actually dreamt last night that Harry made me fall in love with him, and made me believe he loved me too, only to have him video tape us having sex for the first time to prove he finished the little game.

It was the worst dream I have ever had, but I didn’t want to call it a nightmare. If I did, then I could never say I dreamt because my dreams always consisted of nightmares, rather than fluffy clouds and magical knights riding in on a sparkly unicorn to rescue me.

If I wasn’t dreaming about stuff similar to my dream last night, then I didn’t dream at all. My mind would just go blank during the night and if I am being one hundred percent honest, I would ten times rather have nightmares every single night, then to not be able to dream at all. Not being able to dream is hell, and I hate when it happens to me.

“Louis?” Harry asked, dragging me back to what was currently going on. I had an extremely tight grip on his arm and hand and there was something warm and wet pooling around my fingernails. Inhaling deeply, I carefully let go of his hand then I unwound my arm from around his.

Clenching my small hand into a fist, I looked down at Harry’s palm and seen the four perfect nail impressions, though they were filled with blood. Taking a deep breath through my nose, I looked down at my fingernails and seen there was blood on, around, and under them.

“Sorry.” I mumbled, and before Harry could pull his hand away, I was bending down and placing a gentle kiss on each of the cuts. My lips got stained with blood, but I just wiped it off on the back of my sleeve when I stood up. Hooking my arm with Harry’s, I laced out fingers together and smiled softly up at him before we began to walk again.

I was glad Harry didn’t say anything, because I was afraid if he spoke to me, I would end up telling him about my doubts and my dream, and I wasn’t ready for that. If what I thought was true, then I wanted to spend as much time with him as possible before the truth came out, even if it meant I did get hurt in the end.

Even though this all may be one big joke to him, it was all real to me. Everything I felt was real, and everything I did was because I liked him, so if me spending more time with him ends with me getting crushed in the end, then so be it. It’ll all be worth it.  
  



	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back from the dead!!! XD Nah, just kidding, but I have not abandoned you guys! I have been so busy this past month, with work, camping and family stuff, so I haven't really had time to write, plus I had writer's block for a while and that is a bitch. Anyway, on with the show. This chapter is more of a just filler chapter, and it's not the best one I have ever written, but I felt it was necessary. I haven't proof read this chapter yet, being that it's 1:13 in the morning, so I apologize if there is any spelling errors or mistakes. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and I promise I will update as soon as possible!!

**_1 Month later_ **

Two months. Two freaking months. That is all I have left before school gets out for the summer. That is all the time left before I have to say goodbye to not only the school for a few months, but Jen and most likely Harry too.

This past month my mind may have been filled with doubt about whatever me and Harry were, but I couldn’t stop my chest from deflating and my heart from aching at the thought of not seeing Harry over summer vacation. Once you get to know him, he kinda grows on you. The way his dimples pop out when he smiles a genuine smile, or the way he sounds when he laughs unexpectedly is branded into my mind. Every time I think back on any moment me and Harry have shared, it makes my heart race and my face grow red.

He may not be the most romantic person, but the time I have spent with him has been the best times of my life. He has helped me crawl out of my comfort zone. He has made me do things I never expected myself to do, like dancing in the rain or going out in public without my jacket on. He just, he makes me feel more comfortable with myself than anyone ever has, and I don’t think he knows that he is doing it. He is so blind to the fact that I, a once ugly caterpillar, was starting to come out of my cocoon and turn into a beautiful, vibrant butterfly that is just now getting ready to spread it’s wings and fly.

“Are you going to help me with my math work, or just continue to stare out into space?” A voice asked, dragging me out of my thoughts and making me jump slightly. My hand tightened around the pencil I was holding and I felt as the wood bent beneath my fingers, getting ready to snap.

I loosened my grip on my pencil, miraculously, and looked up at Harry, then at the two other people sitting next to him. Ben and Lauren were sitting side by side, them being two of the other students I tutor, and Harry was eyeing Ben, who had been the one that asked me the question.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized quietly, ignoring the way Harry’s head snapped in my direction. “What question are you stuck on?” I asked him, squirming slightly under Harry’s intense gaze. I leaned forward and folded my one arm underneath me to help prop myself up. Using my other arm, I grabbed my pencil and let my hand hover over Ben’s math homework that was already halfway finished.

“13, 14 and 15.” He said, his freckled finger, with dirt underneath his fingernails, pointing at each of the questions. I nodded my head and blew out a slow, deep breath before I reached over and tore a page out of Harry’s notebook to use as a scratch piece of paper. I chanced a glance up at him, not caring that he was upset with me for apologizing to Ben, and smiled softly before I turned my gaze back on the math work.

“Alright, all you’re doing is solving the equations.” I mumbled as I began to write each question down on the piece of paper. “5x+20=-14.” I read aloud, instantly doing the math in my head. I got the answer within a few seconds, and when I did, I wrote it down on the palm of my hand so I would remember to check if he got the same answer as me, because apparently I was too lazy to redo the problem in my head again.

“You wanna subtract 20 from each side then…” I began to explain, the pencil gliding over the paper as I did what I was explaining. When I finished doing that, I passed the paper over to Ben to show him what I was doing, and how to do it. He nodded and furrowed his thick, red eyebrows.

Slowly, he lifted up the pencil and began to finish the question, without my help. I watched carefully as he worked, though I was all too aware of Harry’s gaze on the side of my face. “-6.8, that’s correct!” I exclaimed, showing Ben the palm of my hand that had black, smudged ink on it, though you could still make out the six and eight.

I smiled brightly at him and was tempted to clap my hands, because he had actually been able to do a math problem without much help, but I refrained from doing so. Instead, I leaned back in my chair and smiled at Ben, then Lauren, then my eyes moved over to Harry. My small, proud smile slowly disappeared and was replaced with a shy, yet bright smile.

Harry’s plump lips fell into a frown before they slowly, ever so slowly, upturned into a small smile. Then, finally, his dimples were popping out and his perfectly white teeth were being shown. I felt my heart flutter in my chest and my stomach tighten softly, though it felt different than anything I have ever felt. It was a good feeling, though.

“Do you need any help?” I asked him, and i’m not entirely sure I was referring to his homework. I didn’t know exactly what I was referring to, actually, but Harry must have known because he grinned wickedly and raised his right eyebrow.

“I may have a problem you can help me with.” He said, a spark of mischievousness running through his green eyes. I blushed deeply, still slightly lost, and leaned forward a little, my fingers dancing over the cool tabletop as I twirled my hand above it.

“Oh yeah, what might that be?” I bit the corner of my lip and looked at my hand before I glanced back up at Harry, something deep in my stomach stirring before it completely came to life. It was a warm feeling that sent tingles throughout my stomach and through my body, ceasing in my fingertips and toes.

Harry’s lips parted only a little and he took a sharp breath in, though it was inaudible to anyone but the two of us. Somehow, in the past minute or so, we have moved closer and closer to each other, making it so now me and Harry were only a few inches apart. My one arm was lying flat on the table top and was brushing lightly against the tips of Harry’s fingers that were splayed flat on the table, and my other arm was folded underneath my body that was halfway on the table.

Our breath mingled together, strawberry scented breath mixing perfectly with mint breath that had a hint of coffee in it. Our noses were just mere inches away from touching and one of Harry’s loose curls was tickling the side of my cheek, but I refrained from moving. I was entrapped in this moment, so much so that I completely forgot about the three other people that were in the room with us.

“I’ll show you if you’d like.” His breath ghosted across my face and I automatically inhaled deeply, savoring the way the mint tickled my nose. I flickered my eyes from his eyes, down to his lips, then back up to his eyes. I wanted to lean forward and press my lips against his, to get that same electrifying jolt I got whenever he moved his skillful lips against mine.

I leaned forward a fraction of an inch and licked my bottom lip, my eyes slowly closing as my instincts took over. Want filled my body and just before my lips touched Harry’s, someone beside us cleared their throat. I don’t think I have ever moved as fast as I did just then. Both Harry and I sprung back, my chair almost tipping back and Harry’s hitting against the table behind him.

I flushed a bright red color and refused to look at Harry, knowing if I did the same want would return and I definitely would not be able to pull back this time. I looked up at Jen, that was standing next to us, and slowly exhaled through my nose. I swiped my tongue across my bottom lip, then clamped my teeth around it tightly, ignoring the trickle of blood that coated my tongue when my teeth popped through my lip.

“Sorry.” She said quietly, and I flinched. Just by her tone of voice you could tell this was awkward and that was not at all what I had wanted. I never imagined me being the type of person that flirts with another person in a room full of other people, let alone almost making out with someone.

I stayed staring at her, my mouth opening and closing as I attempted to say something but nothing came out. My brain was spitting out excuses, but my mouth refused to work. It refused to move, to let my tongue curl around the words I so desperately needed to say. I could feel as each word began to build up in my throat, choking me and the feeling only grew worse the harder I tried.

I looked around at the faces that surrounded me, my chest growing tighter when I imagined all of them laughing at me. I wrapped my arms tightly around my waist and bowed my head, not looking any of them in the eyes. I gathered up all my things and was getting ready to stand up and run out of the class, which I have become good at doing, but the second my butt was off the chair, the bell rang.

Jen murmured another apology to me before I left the classroom, but I didn’t say anything to her. I walked through the hallways and down the stairs once I reached the front door. I ignored the bus that was pulling into the parking lot only twenty feet from me, and I walked straight for the black impala I have grown used to riding in.

Without checking to see if the doors were locked, because I knew they weren’t, I threw the passenger door open and plopped down in my seat, exhaling the breath I have been holding since I walked out of Jen’s classroom. Harry’s cologne swirled around the car from my movement, and just from inhaling the scent, my heart stopped thumping and the clamp around my chest loosened.

I folded my arms over my chest and stared out the windshield. Kid’s raced out the doors, all of them in a hurry to finally be free from this prison. My gaze followed a boy that was in grey sweatpants and a oversized black t-shirt, but based on the chains around his neck, I knew that what he was wearing was what he found cool.

His pants sagged so his red boxers were shown, and from where I was sitting, I could still see the brown streaks in his underwear. I laughed loudly, nobody being able to hear me, and turned to look at the doors right as Harry was walking out. He had his backpack slung over his shoulder and normally I would have stared at him the entire time he walked to the car, but a small body that ran from behind him caught my attention.

I grated my teeth together and raked my eyes over  _ her _ body. She had on short pink shorts that barely covered her butt cheeks, and a white t-shirt with a hello kitty on it that was rolled up so her belly button was visible. Her once obnoxiously red hair was now pink, reminding me of unicorn vomit, and it was pulled up in a messy bun. Loose pieces of hair stuck out in spots, but they framed her face perfectly and despite my gut wrenching hate for her, I couldn’t deny that she was pretty.

I watched as she reached forward to grab Harry’s hand, and much to my delight, he ripped his arm away from her and shoved his hand in his pocket. They were still a decent distance away from the car, but somehow, even from far away, Harry managed to lock his eyes with mine and hold my gaze. I felt some of the anger leave my body when I seen his eyes darken from annoyance and his jaw clench.

“Hi Louis!” Nicole said when they reached the car, me only being able to hear her because Harry opened his door. I nodded my head in acknowledgment and watched in utter horror as she too climbed into the car. “Thanks for the ride again, Harry,” she said as she set down in the seat behind him. She reached behind her, her shirt sliding up a little and revealing her pale pink bra, and grabbed her seat belt to buckle it up.

“Don’t mention it.” Harry said under his breath. I ripped my gaze away from her and looked at him, watching as he reached to the side and pressed the button so his seat moved further back than it was, making it so the seat was almost touching Nicole’s leg, giving her little to no leg space. “My legs had no room,” he said when he caught my curious gaze.

I pursed my lips to keep myself from smiling and nodded, knowing that he actually moved the seat to piss Nicole off. “Let me see your bag,” I murmured when I seen Harry shove his new grey back between his legs instead of throwing it in the backseat like he usually does. Without his approval or response, I reached forward and let my hand skim over his thigh, smiling smugly when his body went stiff underneath my touch, and grabbed his bag. I set it down on the floor between my legs, along with mine, and buckled my own seat belt.

“Put your seat belt on,” I reminded Harry, pinning him with my eyes that shimmered with amusement. He glared at me playfully and started the car, rudely ignoring my comment. I huffed and set back in my seat, pulling at the obnoxious seatbelt that dug into my shoulder and neck, irritating my skin.

“Can we turn on the radio?” Nicole asked as soon as we pulled out of the parking lot. I rolled my eyes and turned to look out the window, trying my best to ignore her presence. “Please?”

“No.” Harry and I said in unison, my voice ringing with annoyance and his with an undefined sense of authority. I grinned widely and looked at him, though all I was able to look at was the side of his face. Oddly enough, even the side of his face was beyond attractive and I could honestly stare at him from this point of view all day.

“Please, Harry.” Nicole purred, batting her long eyelashes as she twirled a piece of hair between her fingers. I stared at her in complete amazement. How was it that a human being would willingly be slutty just to get something they want?

_ Ha! Like Harry would touch that. I’d have better luck by just taking off my hoodie. _

As the thought crossed my mind, I pursed my lips and decided why the hell not? It was hot, after all, and I wouldn’t want to get all sweaty. I slipped my head from underneath the strap of the seat belt and reached down to grab the hem of my hoodie, completely ignoring what Harry had said to her. I tugged it up and over my head, my eyes widening when I felt a gust of cool air wash over my warm tummy, meaning my shirt slide up my stomach as well.

I quickly threw my jacket down on the floor and tugged my shirt down, my cheeks heating when I seen Harry’s darkening gaze on me. “You really should be focusing on the road.” I mumbled under my breath, trying to turn his attention away from me and my pale tummy.

Harry grunted under his breath and turned to look at the road, but not without doing something that let me know he wasn’t forgetting what had just happened. He took one hand off the steering wheel, making my panic grow slightly, and splayed it on my thigh. I didn’t swat it away like I normally would have because I not only enjoyed the feeling, but I also knew that this would make Nicole jealous.

He squoze my thigh gently and patted it three times before he finally let it rest limply on my thigh. I bit my lip and blushed, a fire slowly starting to spread up my leg and--- “This is the first time I have ever seen you without your hoodie on!” A voice gasped from behind me before I felt a soft hand brushing my arm.

“What the hell are you doing?” I asked, utterly bewildered that she would actually touch someone without their consent. “You don’t just touch me without asking that’s just… Ugh, no.” A shiver of disgust shot down my spine and had me shiver slightly, causing Harry’s hand to slide further up my leg. Or, at least I think it was from me shivering.

“Your skin just looked so smoo…” She reached forward again and her fingers brushed against my arm, just above the crook of my elbow.

“STAAAPPPPP!!!!” I shrieked, jerking back completely so my back was almost flat against the door. “I don’t like people touching me,” A gentle squeeze on my thigh reminded me that my statement was flawed, but I wasn’t going to take it back. Not when this fucking creep thinks she can touch me just because my skin looks smooth.

“But, Harry?” She said, well more like asked, and gestured towards his hand on my thigh.

“But Harry what?” I asked, protectively placing my hand over his. My hand was much smaller than his, so it just covered the back of his hand, but it still made me feel like I was somewhat protecting him. Stupid, I know.

“He’s touching you.” And the award for stating the most obvious goes to Nicole! I rolled my eyes and expected to feel some sort of embarrassment for doing something I would consider intimate and having someone point it out, but all I really felt was irritation.

“Guess i’m lucky.” Harry said, both mine and Nicole’s eyes snapping over at him. The car slowed down to a stop when we reached a stop sign, and when it did, he looked at Nicole in the rear view mirror and smirked before he looked down at our hands.

I went to retract my hand, but Harry flipped his hand over before I could, and laced our fingers together. He smiled softly at me and I returned it, my thumb subconsciously running along the side of his hand. Harry sighed in content and leaned back in his seat, his hand tightening around mine before he began to drive once again.

“Yeah, soooo… Are you guys going to the party tomorrow night?” Nicole asked, apparently deciding to change to topic. I relaxed back against my own seat and shook my head, which was now resting against the window.

“Of course we are.” Harry said, and that had me shooting straight up in my seat.

“I’m not.” I corrected him, shaking my head furiously when I looked at Nicole. Harry may be going to a party, (i’ll keep my disapproving comments to myself) but there is no way in hell that I am.

“Oh, too bad,” Her voice was laced with fake sympathy, and that had my irritation level spike. “Look’s like I’ll have to be Harry’s plus one,” Her chest inflated as her arrogance grew, along with my jealousy. I gritted my teeth together, trying to keep myself under control, and inhaled deeply, my fingernails digging into Harry’s hand.

I stared Nicole straight in the eye, my gaze never wavering, and said the last thing I ever expected myself to say. “That’s Dylan’s party, right?” She nodded her head slowly, keeping her gaze locked with mine. “I must have forgotten but I promised Harry I would go with him!  I would invite you but third wheeling is kinda sad, even for you, don’t you think?” She gasped loudly, her hand flying up to her mouth and her eyes widening with feigned shock.

I was steaming in my seat, and like in all children’s movies, I imagine smoke coming out of my ears and nose. “This is my stop,” she whispered, and Harry’s car began to slow down and it wasn’t even at a slow crawl before she unbuckled her seatbelt and jumped out of the car. I watched triumphantly as she ran across the street and towards a two story house that was actually really nice.

I exhaled loudly and slammed my head against the window when she was out of sight. “I’m a prick,” I whispered, unlacing my hand from Harry’s so I could cover my face with my hands. I was just a dick to someone all because I was jealous that some guy I have kissed a couple, well more than a couple of times, might actually want to go to a party with her.

“No your not. I thought you handled that situation quite well,” Harry said, and I tried to listen to see if he was joking but he actually sounded sincere.

I peeked at him from behind my fingers and bit my bottom lip when I seen he was staring at me. “I wasn’t too rude?” My voice was quiet and timid, reminding me of the Louis I was not too many months ago. I couldn’t help but cringe when I thought about how I used to act, to how I act now. Back then I was afraid to even say anything to someone because I was afraid I would hurt their feelings, but the new me just got done having a bitch-off with a girl and I only felt a small ounce of remorse for it.

Harry shook his head and patted my thigh, then returned his hand back to the steering wheel. “Nah, you said what she needed to hear. Besides,” he paused and smirked at me, his eyebrows raising slightly. “It got me a pretty hot date to a party,” he winked at me and laughed at my attempt of gasping, though it wasn’t really a gasp because the air got caught in my throat as I half gasped and half choked.

“That’s what you think, Styles. You’re going stag,” I said, trying to keep a straight face to show him I was serious, even though Harry knew that I was joking.

I’m not going to lie. There was some truth behind my words, but when I seen how excited he just looked, I couldn’t be the one who put him in a bad mood, so I opted to keep my mouth shut and go to a party I would regret going to as soon as I stepped through the door.

I folded my legs up on the dashboard and slid down in my seat, making it so I was half laying down and half sitting up. “You’ll stay with me at the party, right?” I tried to keep the worry out of my voice as best as I could, but it wavered slightly.

I laid my head back on my seat and closed my eyes, taking deep, even breaths and focusing on the soft purr of the engine. “I won’t leave you for a second.” Harry reassured me, and despite the anxiety I knew that would be clawing it’s way at my chest tomorrow night, I actually felt a little excited. This was my first party ever, and I was going to be attending it with someone I could actually trust. Well, someone I was hoping I could trust.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, i'm not gonna lie.... The part where Nicole was touching Louis' arm, has actually happened to me. Except for the person that was touching my arm was amazed that I actually had skin underneath my hoodie. XD Just thought I would give you guys a random fact about the odd people I know. Haha. Oh, I hope this chapter wasn't too bad! I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments!!!


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! So, I know this chapter is a little longer but I went against my beta's suggestion and wrote a few more pages than I usually do! I hope you all enjoy this chapter and I would love to get your feedback in the comment's below! Oh, and my Beta was asleep when I finished this chapter, so it hasn't been edited. I apologize for any mistakes there may be!
> 
> Much love!! xx

I stared at the mirror, trying to convince myself that I wasn’t staring at my own reflection, and it honestly wasn’t that hard to do. I didn’t recognize myself right now, and I doubt anyone else would. My chestnut hair was styled into a perfect quiff, and not one piece of hair was out of place. My light blue eyes were no longer rimmed by my thick, black glasses. Instead, I had my contacts in them and to cover up the fact that my eyes looked so bland, I lightly lined them with some of Lottie’s black eyeliner. 

My short legs were being constricted by a pair of black skinny jeans, and when I say skinny, I mean skinny. I barely had enough room to move around, but they made my butt look good, in my opinion. My arms, which looked like limp noodles, were completely bare and showing off a few of my arm tattoos. I had on a loose fitting black tank top, and because it wasn’t my own and it was actually Harry’s that I had borrowed from him, it came to just below my butt.

A light breeze blew through my window and sent a chill down my spin. I shivered softly and wrapped my arms tightly around my torso before I grabbed my phone off my bed and, with one last glance at myself in the mirror, I quietly walked down the hallway. I was almost to the top of the stairs when a familiar mouth watering scent wafted around the hallway. I stopped dead in my tracks and spun around on my heels, then barged into Lottie’s room.

“Give me som…” I began, but quickly shut up when I realized Lottie wasn’t alone. My hand curled around the doorknob and I was about to turn around, until two pairs of bloodshot eyes turned to me. “Urm, sorry. I didn’t know you had company.” My eyes drifted from Lottie, whose eyes were redder than i’ve ever seen them, to a pair of dark brown eyes.

“Nah mate, you can come in. We need a break from this anyway.” He said, his lips curling up slightly before his white teeth were being shown. I bite my lip and was about to shake my head, until he lifted up Lottie’s blue pipe.

“Ahhhh.” I groaned, one foot out of the doorway, while the other one was planted firmly in Lottie’s room. Finally, after much contemplation, I walked into the room and closed the door behind me. I quickly pulled my phone out of my pocket to check the time, and sighed when I seen I had no texts from Harry, and that I still had twenty minutes before Harry was supposed to pick me up. Though, I would be lucky if I had five minutes.

“Fine.” I sighed, shoving my phone into my ridiculously tight pocket, before I grabbed the pipe. I looked back and forth between the two before I lifted it up to my lips and watched as he flicked the lighter, lighting a flame to the green plant.

I inhaled deeply, my lungs automatically screaming for a release. My eyes began to water as I continued to inhale, until finally it became too much and I turned into a coughing mess. I held the pipe as far away from me as my arm would allow me, and coughed until my stomach hurt and I felt the urge to vomit. I stood up straight and wiped the tears away from my eyes, then I looked at both of them.

“Holy shit. Again.” The words weren’t even out of my mouth before a bright flame was being sparked in front of my face. I smiled at Zayn, then lifted the glass pipe up to my lips again and, like before, I inhaled deeply. I watched as the flame dipped down into the bowl, lighting the green herb and turning it a red color as the cherry grew.

We continued this for a few minutes before the large bowl was finally out. I passed the pipe over to Zayn and smiled lopsidedly at the two of them before I walked out of the room and down the tilting hallway. The stairs seemed to creak louder than they ever have before as I descended them, and when I finally reached the bottom, my heart was beating out of my chest from the irrational fear I had that the stairs were going to swallow me.

I placed my hand over my chest and took deep breaths, feeling as my lungs expanded and eagerly took in the fresh air, before I slowly exhaled. I slowly walked over to the door and pulled on my black converse, and right as I opened the door, a hand was being hovered right over my face.

“Woah,” I breathed out, staring up at the large hand that had a metal ring encircling one of the fingers, though I couldn’t really tell which one. “Your hand is right in front of my face.” I said, then suddenly burst into a laughing fit. I hunched over and placed my hands on my knees, tears once again clouding my vision as my stomach clenched painfully.

“You’re in a good mood,” Harry remarked, and even in my current state, I could hear the slight tint of judgement he had in his voice.

“Oh yeah, I just smoked a huuuuggggeeee,” I paused and held my arms out to show him just how huge I was talking. “Bowl with Lottie and Zayn.” My voice was breathy due to how hard I had been laughing only seconds ago, but I honestly can’t remember why I had even laughed so hard over my face almost getting pummeled by Harry’s large fist.

I wiped my eyes once again, suddenly thankful that I had taken Lottie’s waterproof eyeliner, and stood up straight. “What?” I asked when I seen him staring at me, his green eyes dull of any emotions. “Did I do something wrong?” My voice was quiet, and I felt like giggling because of how I sounded and how he looked, but I somehow knew that right now wasn’t the time to laugh.

Harry shook his head and ran his palm over his face. “No. Let’s go.” And just like that, he was back to being himself. His eyes shimmered in the light sunlight and a small smile tugged at his lips as he extended one of his hands.

“I only got high because I was nervous,” I admitted quietly, feeling the need to explain to him why I was stoned out of my mind, even though I really didn’t have to. Harry shook his head once again and said something, but I didn’t catch it, before he enclosed my smaller hand with his and drug me down the steps.

“You look… Hot, by the way,” Harry said as he opened the car door and ushered me inside the warm car. I sat down in my seat, relaxing back against the comfortingly warm leather seats, and nodded at him.

“I know.” I said and smiled up at him, which was apparently not the reaction he was looking for. “Sorry, Styles. I am too relaxed right now to care that you called me hot.” I said and shrugged, being completely honest. My mind wasn’t swimming with all the self doubts I had about myself, nor all the things I thought people would point out about me that wasn’t perfect, which there was a lot.

That’s the main reason that I even smoke weed. It helps me relax and be at ease with myself. It makes my brain quiet down and it actually lets me enjoy the pure beauty that surrounds me, rather than the dark chaos that is constantly clouding my mind and denying me the chance to see just how beautiful the world is through my tainted eyes.

Harry chuckled quietly and closed my door. I watched him as he walked around the car, admiring the way his small bum looked in his jeans that matched mine. I turned my head as he walked, and my eyes stayed on his bum for a little longer than necessary before they moved up his body and stopped on his arms.

Even in the shirt that covered his bicep, which was loose, you could see just how big his muscles really are. I couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel to have his muscles dance under my touch as I lightly brushed my hands along them, or even my tongue.

I felt my pants grow a little tighter, but I couldn’t stop my straying thoughts. I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about discovering every single inch of Harry’s skin, to know what dips where and how smooth one patch of skin is compared to the other. I wanted to know what it would feel like to have my short legs tangled with his after we had sex, to have both of our breaths mingle together as we came down from the high that was nothing but natural.

“What’s sex like?” I blurted out when Harry set down in the car. I stared directly at him, keeping my steady gaze on him as I awaited the answer to my very personal question. Normally I would have blushed and covered my face with my hands, or I wouldn’t have even answered the question. But right now, the filter that is connected to my mouth is broke and i’m saying everything that comes the mind.

Harry inhaled deeply, his nostrils flaring a little, and examined my face for a second, to see if I was serious, before he locked my eyes with his. “I don’t know how to explain it, but it feels good. And apparently if you do it with someone you love, it feels better?” He said, though his last sentence sounded more like a question than a statement.

“You haven’t had sex with someone that you love?” I asked, bewildered by his answer. If he hasn’t had sex with someone he loves, then why has he even bothered to have sex? I mean, to me, sex is something you only do with someone you love, or care about on a deep level.

Harry shook his head, his curls flying around his head, and shrugged. “I haven’t loved anyone, and I didn’t want to wait to have sex so I just fucked whoever wanted to fuck without being in a relationship.” He explained, eyeing me as he did so. It sounded like he was choosing each word he said carefully, but based on the way he flinched when I gasped, he decided he didn’t choose his words too carefully.

I nodded slowly, trying to digest what he said. I wanted to say something, to tell him that he should have waited until he found someone he loved, but I didn’t want him to feel like I was judging him. Besides, I couldn’t help the slight bubble of excitement that began to blossom in my chest when my brain reminded me that he hasn’t  _ loved  _ anyone yet.

“How many people have you had sex with?” I asked him, knowing I might regret asking the question but it was one I wanted to know the answer to. I felt my stomach clench painfully when he held up his hand and began to count silently, the urge to vomit growing stronger when he had all five fingers held up, but continued to count on his other hand.

“Seven,” He finally said, but when he looked at me, I could see the hesitation he had in his eyes, meaning there was more but he just didn’t want to tell me. I bit my lip and nodded, my hand clenching into a fist in an attempt to distract me from the pressure that began to grow behind my droopy eyes.

“Can we go?” I asked him quietly, internally sighing when my voice didn’t crack and let him know that the number of people he slept with had affected me as bad as it did.  The little bubble of happiness that I had felt about him saying he hasn’t loved anyone yet was overridden by the pain of knowing that he has experienced things with several, or possibly more, other people. Thing’s I probably will never get to experience with him.

Harry opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but he apparently decided against it because he closed it and turned in his seat completely before he began to drive. I stared out the windshield, and much to my liking, my mind slowly went blank again as I gave into my high, which had started to dwindle down just a tad bit.

I had no idea how long we had been driving for before the words that I had wanted to say began to bubble up my throat before I finally opened my mouth and let them escape. “Were they boys, or girls? Did any of them mean anything to you? Have you had sex since you moved here?” I rambled on, asking each question that popped into my mind.

“Woah, calm down,” Harry said, holding up one of his hands to single that he needed to catch up with my rapid words. I nodded my head softly and bit my lip, watching his face closely as he thought about that answers to my questions. His face mostly stayed neutral, but just before he answered me, his right eye twitched and his lips fell into a deep frown.

“All boys, except for one and it was a girl,” He said, his eyes trained on the road as he spoke. “None of them meant anything to me. I looked at them like a fun bag that was good for only one use before I throw them away,” He continued, shrugging when I gasped. His eyes stayed locked on the road, but even from the side view, I could see the very faint twinkle of regret in them.

“And no, not yet. I have been offered it many, many... “ He paused and sighed, freeing one hand off of the steering wheel so he could rack his fingers through his tangly curls. “Many times, but none of the ones that have offered have caught my attention,” He finished with a long, drawn out sigh, his eyes flickering over to me for a second before he focused back on the road.

I inclined my head a fraction of an inch, on the verge of nodding, until all of what he said clicked. “Alright, Styles. If you could have sex with anyone at this school, who would it be?” I asked, trying to avert any of his attention off of me, who was a squirming mess in the seat at the thought that Harry may have been talking about me.

I chanced a glance at him from the corner of my eye, my lips falling into a frown when I seen his lips were pursed as he got lost in deep thought, or so I thought. “Mrs. Owens,” he finally answered, grinning widely at me when my first instinct was to hit me across the chest, which I did. My fingers throbbed painfully, and I honestly think that my attempt to hurt him, hurt me a lot more.

“What?!? She’s hot! Especially with that cane. God, imagine what she could do with that wooden cane.” Harry stared out into space like he was daydreaming about all the things that she could do with the cane, while I was laughing like a dying hyena in the passenger seat.

“SHE’S 64, HARRY!” I yelled around my laughter. I clutched my stomach tightly, images of Harry bent over her old, wooden desk with his pants pulled down around his ankles popping into mind. My laughter increased tremendously when Mrs. Owens popped up too, in a black leather sex suit and her worn out cane.

When I realized that I could imagine what each wrinkle on her looked like, I quickly changed to subject in my mind and my laughter instantly ceased. “That’s disturbing.” I faintly whispered, swallowing thickly as vomit began to build up in my throat.

“Fine, fine. You want honest?” He asked, wiping tears from his own eyes. I nodded my head eagerly and looked at him when he began to drive, grinning when I seen his knuckles go a light white color as he gripped the steering wheel tighter.

“I would have sex with you,” Harry finally said after five long, agonizing seconds. I had expected him to sound shy or quiet, but he didn’t. He sounded proud of the fact that he would have sex with me, which I imagine would be the exact opposite if he had told me this in public.

“Then why don’t you?” I asked him, biting my bottom lip as I batted my long eyelashes. I had no idea if I was being serious or not, but if I ever was put into the position to have sex with Harry fucking Styles, there is no way that I would be caught passing up the offer,.

Harry laughed and shook his head, his hands loosening from their death grip on the black steering wheel. “I’ll pull over right now and fuck you.” He mumbled, his voice dropping a few notches lower as the car swerved over to the white line on the side of the road. 

“Okay.” I whispered, my heartbeat picking up speed when I seen the car slowly swerve off of the road before we were stopping on the side of a deserted road with nothing in sight, other than the green fields that surround us. 

I looked around our surroundings, to try and take my mind off of the fact that I just agreed to have sex with a man who was staring at me like I was a piece of meat. On either sides of us there was nothing but green fields that had a few plants growing, all of them soaking in the remainder of the evening sun.

I looked up at the sky for a split second and I was rendered speechless. The sky was starting to go a darker color, and if you looked in the direction that the sun was setting in, you would see nothing but a pinkish sunset that was so bold compared to the sky. I admired it for a second, because never in my lifetime would I see a sunset that looked exactly like this one.

Just as that thought crossed my mind, a flock of birds flew right in front of the sunset and I found myself falling deeper and deeper into the captivating beauty that nature is. “Louis?” A rough, yet timid voice asked from beside me.

I swallowed thickly and despite the voice in my head telling me not to look at him, I did. I ripped my gaze away from the entrapping view, only to look at another view I would never get tired of admiring. “Yes?” I asked quietly, though I knew why he has said my name.

I knew exactly why Harry had wanted my attention, but I didn’t want to believe that my first time would be in a car with a man that I didn’t even know if he loved me. I didn’t speak my worries, however. I just stayed staring at him, trying to swallow back all of my fears that wanted to come alive, that wanted to be spoken so they weren’t forgotten.

“I’m not going to have sex with you right now, so you can breath and wipe away that scared puppy look.” Harry said softly, his large hand gently pressing against the side of my face. He ran his thumb along my bottom lip and breathed in deeply, showing me what he wanted me to do.

I mirrored him and took a deep breath in, my tired lungs sighing as some of the pressure was taken off my chest. I gradually closed my eyes, the last thing that I seen being a pair of light pink lips that was only a few inches away from my face. I didn’t know where Harry was going to kiss me, and I had wanted to hold my breath in anticipation, but I didn’t have time to before a pair of lips were gently pressing against mine.

“Breath,” he reminded me, and I wanted to scream at him, to tell him that I was, but I didn’t want to take the chance on moving my lips away from his.

When I felt Harry begin to pull back, I quickly lifted my hands up to the sides of his face and held him in place before I cautiously parted my lips. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I recalled all the times that me and Harry have kissed, and I did what he did. Tentatively, I moved my soft lips against his chapped ones and with a sudden burst of courage, I ran my tongue along his bottom lip.

Almost instantly, Harry’s lips parted and my tongue was slowly slipping into his mouth. I ignored the way his tongue felt against mine, and I focused on the way it felt to have my tongue moving around his mouth, exploring a place that was foreign to me, but not to him. An unexpected vibration against my tongue and lips had my eyes shooting open and my body scooting backwards.

I stared at Harry, my wet lips parted as I gasped in deep breathes. “Did I hurt you?” I asked him, worried that when I had attempted to have my first dominant makeout session, that I ended up hurting his mouth in some way. I swallowed the saliva that pooled in my mouth, a tingle of pleasure running through my body when I tasted to faint flavor of Harry’s mouthwash, mixed with a orange flavored drink he must have drank before he came to pick me up.

Harry shook his head and slowly opened his eyes, revealing a pair of green eyes with blown pupils. “I moaned,” he admitted a little sheepishly, a light red color tinting his cheeks. And, like boulder hitting me right in the chest, realization dawned on me.

_ Dear god, I made Harry Styles moan, and blush all in the same sitting. _

I grinned widely and leaned forward, my hand resting on his thigh. “I made you moan?” I questioned him smugly, my smile growing when I seen him roll his eyes.

“That’s what I just said,” He huffed before situating himself so his one arm was resting on the back of his seat, while the other stayed propped up on the steering wheel.

A bulge in Harry’s trousers caught my eye, which I probably wouldn’t have noticed if he hadn’t of moved and made it so he was facing me completely. I grinned wickedly and leaned over the center console more, my eyes staying on the bulge for a few seconds before they moved back up to Harry’s face.

“What if I…” I began, but the song ‘Dysfunctional’ by tech n9ne was suddenly blaring in the car. I scrambled back into my seat and watched through wide eyes as Harry growled loudly and fished his phone out of his pocket, his finger slamming down on the screen as he answered it before he lifted to large, white phone up to his ear.

“What?” He snapped, his eyes flaring for a brief moment. I bit down on my bottom lip harshly and stared at him, watching as his face stayed the same as he listened to the person on the other side of the phone talk. “Yeah, well, I told you I would be there. You don’t have to fucking call me and check in on me like you’re my fucking mother,” He growled into the phone before he pressed the end button and threw his phone in the backseat.

“What?” I asked him cautiously, not wanting to piss him off even further.

Harry inhaled deeply and closed his eyes for a second, then readjusted his pants so his stiffy wasn’t as noticeable. “Nothing. We just have a bloody party to attend,” he growled, and with that said, he started the car once again and we began to drive.

I stared out the window, trying to take my mind off of the fact that my penis was hard in my jeans and throbbing in a painful rhythm. The minutes dragged on painfully slow until I seen the first house come into sight, followed by a couple more before we turned down a street that was full of houses. I sighed deeply and shifted back in my seat, my mind straying to what happened those ten long minutes ago, and the events previous to that.

“Harry, before, you said you have had sex with a girl, so does that make you gay orrrr…” I dragged out the ‘r’ in or, not wanting to finish the sentence because I felt as the heat rose to my cheeks.

Harry cleared his throat and I shifted in my seat, my face automatically burying itself in my shoulder to hide it. “No, i’m not gay. I thought, at one point in time, that if I had sex with a girl my sexual orientation would change,” he paused and chuckled under his breath, his shoulders bouncing from the almost inaudible noise.

“But after I boned the chick and lost my virginity, I realized that tits and a vagina was not what I was looking for, considering I fantasized about Johnny Depp the entire time,” he admitted with a slight shrug of his shoulders, seeming not at all fazed with the question I just asked him.

I pursed my lips and nodded, opening my mouth to say something but before I could even come up with a full sentence for his shocking admittance, bright lights filled the dark space around us. I looked down the street, my mouth falling open when I seen a huge house with colorful lights dancing around, lighting up the space for all the teens that littered the space outside.

Harry drove down the long driveway, my chest growing tighter and tighter the closer we got to the house. I felt my chest tighten even more painfully when people began to hit on the windows of the car, their beers splattering all over the windows from their movement. “I can’t do this,” I whispered to myself, watching through wide eyes as Harry pulled into a empty spot we found, though it was still quite a ways from the front door.

Harry put the car in park and turned it off, turning to me to smile with his heart melting smiled that made his dimples pop out. “Let’s go,” he said quietly, his hand hovering over my hand before he finally clasped his over mine and gave it a small squeeze. I went to return it, but that moment my finger’s lifted up to curl around his hand, he was pulling it back and getting out of the car.

I let my hand fall limp in my lap and turned my direction back up to the house, my heartbeat accelerating to an extremely fast paced rhythm. “Come on,” Harry said as he opened my door, not even giving me a chance to collect my thoughts before he was tugging me out of the car and locking to doors.

I didn’t even have time to turn around completely before I was being drug down the sidewalk, my body soon colliding with Harry’s when he tugged me forward the moment we stepped onto the dark green grass. He pushed past all the swaying teens on the lawn, that danced to the beat of the song that was blaring loudly, and growled a few times at them, which made their eyes widen before they stepped out of the way.

“Harry, slow down,” I pleaded, trying to pull away from his side but his arm around my shoulders was keeping me pinned in place.

“Unless you want to be swallowed alive, i’d advise you not to leave my side,” Harry whispered/growled in my ear, his arm tightening impossibly tighter around my shoulders and side. I soon found out why he said that when walked through the open door and my ears automatically began to ring.

The music increased loudly and bounced off the walls, which was the reason for my ringing ears, and it vibrated the floor. That, and the few teens that would rather jump up and down, rather than grind on each other like the rest of them. My nostrils were attacked by the heavy stench of sweat, weed, and alcohol, the mixture making my stomach churn painfully.

I buried myself deeper into Harry’s side and gripped the front and back of his t-shirt, my body loosening up just a little when I smelt his cologne. I peeped at the space around me, watching with a tight chest and broad eyes as a group of people played what appeared to be a ping pong stripping game in the corner of the room, just beyond the dance floor.

I stood up on my tippy toes and leaned as close to Harry’s ear as I possibly could, my feet cramping from the position as I we picked up the speed. “Where are we going?” I shouted in his ear, my head quickly shooting back an inch when Harry leaned his head closer to me, causing his hair to go into my mouth.

“What? Oh, we are going to the kitchen,” he said, his accent thicker from him yelling. I nodded and plopped back down onto my feet, both mine and Harry’s body moving to the side when a guy in nothing but underwear ran through the house, his hair drenched in what stunk like beer.

I held my breath and buried my face into his armpit, relief washing through my body when I smelt men’s axe deodorant. Harry held my close and began to pull me towards the kitchen again when the walkway was somewhat clear again.

We seemed to walk forever before he pulled my  into a large room with beautiful white marble counters and stained wooden doors. Harry pulled me to the counter that was right next to the stainless steel fridge with the touchscreen on the front, that not only dispensed ice but water too. The counter was lined with more alcohol than I have ever seen, some of the brands unfamiliar to me.

“What do you want?” Harry asked me, shouting over not only the music, but the few people in the kitchen that were talking. I eyed the alcohol, my eyes lingering on the blueberry vodka. Harry followed my gaze and nodded, grabbing two red cups before he filled mine almost to the top with the vodka, and his with crowns royal.

I eagerly took the cup, being overly excited to taste the blueberry flavored alcohol, and sipped on the sweet, yet burning liquid. Harry laughed when my face scrunched up in disgust, and took a sip of his own drink. I watched him close his eyes for a second and hum in approval, his lips glistening in the light from the alcohol that lingered on his lips.

I tilted my head to the side and lifted my hand up, smiling at Harry when he caught what I was saying and passed me his cup. I held his cup securely in my right hand and lifted it up to my lips, not even bothering to smell it because I knew the scent would be horrid and make me not want to taste it. I tiled the cup back and let the brown liquid fill my mouth before I swallowed, my eyes locked with Harry’s while I did.A fire began to slide down my throat and heat my chest, before it slide down into the pit of my stomach. I gagged a little at the taste, which was bitter, and coughed from the burning in my lungs that only seemed to grow worse from me coughing.

“Slow down there,” Harry warned me, prying my hands off of his cup. I unwillingly let go of it, my head spinning and my vision going black when I snapped my head up at the sound of a familiar voice yelling from across the room.

“Harrryyyy, come play truth or dare with us!” Nicole yelled from her place in the middle of the sitting room. Harry looked down at me, his eyes searching mine for approval. I clenched my hand into a fist and and lifted my cup back up to my lips, chugging half of the vodka that filled my cup.

I inhaled deeply and pulled my cup back, a smile growing on my lips when I felt the alcohol began to course through my veins, making my body and head feel light. “Let’s go,” I said, slurring my words. I grabbed a hold of Harry’s free hand and began to drag him in the opposite direction of the dance floor, which was on the other side of the kitchen.

We set down in the two remaining spots in the large circle, that were luckily next to each other, and watched as a girl scooted forward on her knees and spun the bottom, her short, pink dress bunching up her thighs a little. The bottle spun and spun and spun before it landed on a guy with red shorts and a white t-shirt, his blonde hair short and spiked.

“Alright!” He shouted, grinning widely at everyone before he pinned his eyes on the same girl that had spun the bottle, who was just now returning to her seat with the bottle in her lap. “Truth or Dare, Diana?” He asked her, his right eyebrow rising as he smirked over at her, obviously knowing what to ask or say for either choices.

She picked dare, and he dared her to take off her bra, which she did. She slipped the large, white thing from the hole in the arm of her dress and flung it at him, hitting him directly in the face. Everybody cheered and clapped before she dared someone else, the game continuing like that until I finally heard my name being called.

My heart stopped when a male’s voice said my name, my throat closing off completely when I seen everyone was staring at me, waiting for me to pick if I wanted to answer something truthfully about myself, or possibly do something that would embarrass me. I bit my bottom lip and looked up at Harry, seeing he was already staring at me, his eyes warning me to pick carefully before he looked back into the middle of the circle.

I held my breath when I finally made up my decision, the alcohol helping me come to a quick decision. My palms started to sweat when I turned to look back at the circle of people, my eyes focusing on Xavier--one of the mid popular students that went to my school. A large grin tugged at my lips when my glazed eyes locked with his shiny grey ones. I set my cup in front of me, after I took a sip, and cleared my throat before I opened my mouth to give them my answer…

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IIII'MMMMM BACK!!!! Gah, I had expected to have this chapter posted a lot sooner than today, but I have literally wrote four different endings to this one. My beta said they were all good, but I didn't feel like it was right and I still don't, but this chapter is as close to perfect as my mind will allow me to get right now. This chapter is longer than any chapter I have ever written, and it is honestly one of my favorites.... So far... I hope you all enjoy it and if you ever have a suggestion for the story, you can comment below or message me on my kik account @perfectdarkness626

“Dare,” I blurted out, my new found liquid courage coursing through my veins and making me think that was a good idea. I stared at Xavier, blocking out the chorus of whistles and other odd noises. I watched as he scratched the back of his neck, his face scrunching up as he thought about what he wanted to dare me. He finally leaned over to the person next to him, and I felt my stomach clench painfully when a wicked grin grew on his face when the other person whispered something in his ear.

The vomit slowly started to bile up in my throat, and my stomach clenched painfully as thoughts about what they would dare me to do began to jumble my mind. “I dare you to take a belly button shot out of a male’s belly button and…” He paused, and I could feel as the knot in my stomach grew larger by the seconds that slowly ticked by. “You have to strip down naked.” He finished, and that had all the contents of my stomach damn near coming up.

A hand on my shoulder suddenly calmed everything down and the knot in my stomach instantly vanished, along with the urge to vomit. I looked at the person the hand belonged to, even though I really did need to because I knew who it was, and watched as Harry’s beautiful face contorted into one of anger. “It’s one or the other. It’s called picking  _ one  _ dare for a reason, prick,” Harry growled, his hand tightening on my shoulder.

I looked back and forth between the two, honestly being amazed at how angry Harry looked, and how calm Xavier looked. I felt like I was in between a pissing match between two dogs, and if I honestly had to pick who I thought would win, it would have to be the man sitting next to me that’s hand was crushing my shoulder.

I felt like I needed to laugh, and I almost did until Xavier leaned forward, his face as cocky as ever, and locked eyes with me. “Fine, I dare you to strip down naked.” He said, deciding that seeing me naked was better than seeing me suck alcohol out of a guy’s belly button, which sounded all too tempting.

_ Oh, Harry won't be happy about me showing everybody what he hasn't seen. _

“Wait, that was tha second one. I wanna do tha first one,” I slurred out, my body leaning into Harry’s in hopes he would protect me and my sacred juju’s from all these hungry eyes. “I wanna do tha first one,” I whispered up to Harry, an inaudible sigh of relief escaping past my lips when Harry let go of my shoulder and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him so I was almost sitting on his lap.

“You heard him, he wants the first one,” Harry said through gritted teeth, and even in my drunken state, I could tell he wasn’t kidding around. And based on the look on Xavier’s face, which I caught a peep of when I turned my head a little so it wasn’t buried in Harry’s armpit, he knew Harry wasn’t kidding either.

“F-Fine. He can do the first one,” He finally whispered, his adam’s apple bobbing when he swallowed thickly. There was a loud chorus of deep breathes being let out, and I was glad that, for once, I wasn’t the only one who’s first instinct was to hold their breath and watch as the scene unfolded in front of them.

Harry huffed deeply through his nose and stood up, leaving me on the floor alone. I pulled my knees up to my chest and smiled at the people around me, my eyes hovering on a girl three spots away from me. “I like your hair,” I mumbled, admiring the rainbow streaks that ran throughout her hair. I knew that I should be worried that Harry left me alone, and that I was going to be taking a shot out of someones belly button, but somehow, I didn’t feel worried. I knew Harry would take care of me, and that was something no one could deny.

The girl smiled at me, revealing her piercing that was on the inside of her upper lip. I wanted to tell her that it was weird looking and made her lip pop out, but luckily for me, the filter that was connected to my mouth and brain was intact, for once. I forced a smile and bit my lip, nodding slowly-- a little unsurely, before I turned to look back at the middle of the circle.

“You and Harry dating?” Someone asked, my head snapping in the direction of their voice which resulted in a huge fucking painful neck spasm. I tried to keep my face neutral as pain shot throughout my neck and made it twitch, and I was hoping it worked. I stared at the person that asked my the question, my vision suddenly being rimmed with white when the alcohol fully kicked in.

“Wha? No. We’re friend’s,” I said slowly, my tongue feeling heavy with each word I said. I furrowed my eyebrows and bit down on it, fear striking through my body when I didn’t feel one ounce of pain.

“Really? He seem’s a little too protective over you for you two to…”

I held up my hand, cutting him off, and rolled my eyes. “That is none of your business. You have a guy friend you’re protective over, yeah? So mind your damn business or i’ll start calling you and Landon a couple,” I said, my eyebrow arching when his mouth opened for a second before he closed it and scooted a little further back into the shadows.

I grinned widely and nodded my head once, then hooked my chin on my knees. I stared at the flower design on a random girl’s shoes, my mind zoning in on that specific spot. I didn’t know how long I had been staring at her shoes before someone was sitting next to me, their knee hitting against the side of my leg.

I lulled my head to the side lazily and smiled at Harry, who was holding up a bottle of clear alcohol. I tried to read the letter’s, but they all jumbled together on the bottle and I gave up after I managed to read the letter p. “ ‘s it yummy?” I asked him lazily, my cheek smashed against the top of my knees that were still cradled tightly against my chest.

“The best,” he reassured me, his secret smile tugging at his lips before he looked down at the bottle in his hands and unscrewed the black lid.

“Alright, who’s the lucky bitch i’m drinking out of tonight?” I asked, clapping my hands together after I set back and laid my legs straight in front of me. “Your belly button’s better be clean,” I added as an after thought, the idea of drinking belly button lint upsetting my stomach.

“I guess i’m the lucky bitch,” Harry said from beside me, amusement evident in his voice. I smiled softly and looked over at him, my eye’s widening when he took his shirt off and revealed the toned chest I have dreamed about far too many times.

I quickly covered my eyes with my hand and turned away, gasping in shock that Harry would actually take his shirt off in public. “Put that back on, Harold. There are people here!” I hissed through clenched teeth, my free hand searching blindly on the floor for his shirt, which I had no luck finding.

I heard him laugh and I turned my head in the direction, my finger’s parting slightly so I could peek at Harry through the small space. “Ohh…” I mumbled quietly, realization just now dawning on me. I blushed furiously and clumsily climbed up onto my knees, my balance amazingly being somewhat intact.

Once I was on my knees, Harry laid flat on his back on the dirty floor and crossed one of his arms behind his head so he could prop it up. I gulped loudly and looked down at his chest, my throat tightening when I slowly traced my eyes down his large pecks, to his defined abs that were screaming for me to lick them.

I internally growled and pushed all those thoughts down, this not at all being the time to get a raging hard on. I took a deep breath in and held it for a few seconds, then slowly exhaled it. My nerves began to calm down, that technique being something I learned to do on the internet if you had anxiety, and I was able to focus on Harry’s deep navel.

He lifted the clear bottle up and I watched in fascination, and horror, as he tipped the bottle a little so the clear liquid began to pool in his belly button. “Don’t worry, it’s clean,” he said jokingly when he finished pouring the alcohol in. I nodded my head and kept my eyes focused on his belly button that was overflowing with alcohol, and it looked like a lot, but it honestly wasn’t as much as I thought.

I clenched my hand into a small fist, rested it on Harry’s thigh, and bowed my head down far enough that my lips were just inches away from his belly button. I let my eyes close, my mind tricking me into thinking this was like one of my dreams where I kissed my way up Harry’s torso before we made love. When I felt my pants grow a little tighter, I quickly opened my mouth and placed my lips on either side of his belly button, then I slipped my tongue into his navel and sucked the alcohol into my mouth.

The alcohol slid down my throat, the burning no longer fazing me, and I pulled back as quickly as I could. I licked my bottom lip, humming in approval when I tasted nothing but coconut’s, and fell back on my bum, my legs crossing so I could attempt to hid my semi hard on. I bit my tongue and looked over at Harry, a groan lodging itself in my throat when I seen he was still lying on his back, his burning green eyes pinned on me.

“Don’t,” I whispered, being all too familiar with that look. I seen his green eyes grow darker and I seen the clench of his jaw, signaling that he was not at all happy with me and we would discuss this later, if he didn’t drag me out of the room at any moment.

I nodded my head in agreement and looked back at Xavier, who was eyeing me. My eyes widened and I quickly looked around the circle. “Black haired girl!” I shouted, pointing at a girl on the other end of the circle, her body almost hidden behind two tall guys. Her head popped up when she realized I was talking to her, and she looked around for a second before she looked at me and smiled softly. “Truth or dare?” I asked, having no idea what to do for either but apparently it was mandatory to ask someone else.

She tapped her chin as she thought for a few seconds, her black fingernail standing out against her olive skin tone. “Truth,” she finally said, smiling sheepishly when a few people booed. I tried to stay looking at her, hoping it would help with my decision, but out of the corner of my eye, I seen Harry reach over and pick up his shirt before he pulled in back on.

I bit the inside of my cheek and nodded, thinking hard about what I could ask her, but I drew up blank. “How many dick’s have she sucked,” a rough voice asked, their breath ghosting down my neck and making the hairs on the back of my neck stand. I didn’t question why he wanted to know that, because I knew Harry was a perverted shit, so I really wasn’t shocked.

I repeated Harry’s question and subconsciously leaned closer to him, a tightness in my jeans just reminding me of my hard on I got only a few minutes ago. I shrugged my shoulders, having forgot about it, and rested my head on Harry’s bicep.

“5,” the girl answered, but everyone in here knew she was lying. She didn’t look like the type of girl that has only sucked 5 dicks, and even as the thought crosses my mind and I realize how rude it was, I can’t help but wonder how many dicks she really has sucked.

I ignored my curiosity and nodded, my eyes fluttering closed. My body began to relax completely and I felt my mind shutting off as the alcohol finished numbing it. I was slowly dozing off, but an abrupt shake of my shoulder had me shooting up straight, my body almost colliding with the person’s next to me.

I looked around briefly, my eyes wide, then I looked up at Harry. He was staring down at me, and the look in his eyes let me know that it was him that not only woke me up, but he also had a question to ask me. I sighed, genuinely not knowing when I became such an amazing Harry reader, and stood up. I dusted the invisible dirt off my pants and went to offer a hand to Harry, but he was already standing next to me.

I pouted softly, not wanting to walk on my own, and reached one of my hands out. I was hoping Harry would take it and lead me out of the room, and as if everything was going my way tonight, he laced our fingers together, pulled me to his side, and began to haul me out of the room. I let my feet drag behind me, giggling quietly when I thought about how ridiculous the two of us must look right now. Well, more so me then Harry.

We walked through the massive house, having to push our way past all the sweaty bodies, and out the front door. I was about to ask Harry where we were going, but I didn’t need to when I looked around me and seen all the cars, then his black impala. I knew he was taking me home, and I tried not to feel disappointed but I really didn’t want to night to end already.

I kept my mouth quiet, knowing if I spoke I would make Harry mad and I would hiccup. When we reached the car, he opened my door and shoved me into the car, then walked around to his side and climbed in. Before I even had time to reach behind me and grab my seatbelt, Harry was already pulling out of his parking spot and turning around so we could begin our journey back home.

“Why in such a hurry?” I asked him, buckling up my seatbelt with shaky fingers. I glanced out the window, but quickly regretted it when I seen the trees leaning into the car. A small part of me knew that it was from the alcohol and the weed, but a larger part of me couldn’t help but believe that this was all real, that the trees really were chasing after the car and whispering dark things to me that only I could hear, but couldn’t decipher.

“Don’t worry about it,” Harry simply said, and that was that. I closed my eyes and leaned back against my seat, my head resting against the headrest. I tried to block out the world and focus mainly on my slow, steady heartbeat. I swear that if I listened closely, I could hear the blood pumping through my veins. It was cool to listen to, but freaky to think about at the same time.

“Come on,” Harry said, his voice barely making it past the calm haze that surrounded my head. I let my eyes flutter open and looked at the place surrounding us. I didn’t recognize this street at all, and I soon realized why when I looked up at the gigantic house that was probably ten times bigger than my entire block.

I gulped loudly and shook my head, my body cowering back into my seat. “No, if that’s what I think it is I won’t go in. It’s too big.” I whispered, utterly terrified of the idea of going into Harry’s house. It wasn’t so much the fact that it was his house, but the fact that he had a big, way bigger house than mine, which meant he had more money than me. I feared that the fact that I didn’t come from money would be a problem, but then I remembered that Harry has already seen, and been inside my house, and he hasn’t left yet.

Harry opened my door and went to say something, but I shushed him and undid my seatbelt. I climbed out of the car and smiled up at him, trying my best to swallow down all the doubt that has started to grow. With what little courage was still running through my veins, I grabbed a hold of Harry’s hand and followed him up the long ass driveway. We walked past four large garage doors, then up a few steps and onto a porch that circled around the house. I squinted my eyes to see what was on the porch, but even with the bright lights that were illuminating the dark night, I couldn’t make out anything that was three feet away from me.

Harry stopped in front of a huge glass door and held a finger up to his lips, then he slowly twisted the silver door knob and pushed the door open. I was anticipating the moment the door squeaked, but it didn’t, reminding me that they had money to buy new door hinges so their doors didn’t squeak every time someone used it.

He grabbed a hold of my hand again, that I didn’t even notice he had let go of, and tugged me into the house. I looked around the entrance hall, only being able to make out the two large staircases on either side of the rooms. Harry closed the door behind us and just as my eyes had focused on what looked like a piano in the room over, he was tugging me towards the left staircase.

I looked around, imagining I looked like a cute little puppy, and tried to keep up with his quick steps. I took one stair at a time while he took two, which resulted in him reaching the top of the stairs by the time I was halfway up. I paused for a second when a picture on the wall caught my attention, my lips stretching into a grin when I seen a little boy in a yellow and black striped shirt with short, curly hair and deep dimples.

“You!....” I began, but a light being flicked on underneath the stairs had my heart stopping completely in my chest. I quickly, or as quickly as I could, ran up the stairs and went to hide behind Harry, only to be pushed aside so I was standing with my back against the wall, making it so I was completely hidden from anyone that would look up from down at the bottom of the stairs.

“Harry?” A soft, female voice called out. Her voice echoed in the quiet house, and it seemed to still be echoing when the light at the bottom of the stairs was being flicked on. I pressed myself flatter against the wall and took a step aside, trying to hide myself even more than before. Harry shot a warning glance at me, then smiled widely when he looked down the stairs.

“Hi, mum,” he said quietly, though loud enough for her to hear. I stared at him, the side of his face that was facing me being illuminated by the bright, yet soft glow of the yellow light.

“What are you doing home so late,” She asked, and now that she was closer, I could hear how her voice was thick and slow, meaning we had woke her up. I bit my lip and tried to ignore the bubble of quilt that began to build in my stomach, so I could focus on Harry and his mum.

Harry scratched the back of his neck and leaned against the wall I was pressed against, his shoulder on the corner of it and being only a few inches away from mine. “I was out at that party I told you about,” he said, but the twitch of his right eye let me know that he wasn’t being one hundred percent truthful.

_ Little bitch. _

Wait, why am I mad? I was at the party with him. I knew exactly where he was at and what he was doing. But, wait. Why had it taken him so long to get the alcohol so I could do the shot out of his belly button? Had he been in the kitchen flirting with another girl, or guy? Had he been giving his number away to another person?

My blood began to boil and I clenched my jaw tightly to keep myself from saying anything while he was still talking to his mom. “Alright, love you too,” he mumbled, then waved. The moment the light at the bottom of the stairs was being shut off, I spun around on my heels and began to stomp quietly down the hallway. I looked at each door I passed, figuring I could figure out which one Harry’s was but when I reached the end of the hallway, I noticed that all the doors were the same.

I turned around and seen that Harry was still standing at the top of the stairs, his long arm pointing in the direction of the other hallway. I blushed lightly and took off that way, continuing my little stomping fit all the while. I walked past Harry, my gaze staying pinned on the black hallway because I was far too tempted to push him down the stairs for something I didn’t even know he did.

I walked past a few doors and smirked when I seen a red door that almost looked like blood. I didn’t bother asking Harry who’s room it was, because I already knew. I pushed the door open and stormed into the room, but stopped dead in my tracks. So far, Harry’s room has been the only one with the light on, which allowed me to see everything in his room perfectly.

There were posters all over the walls and a few pictures of a teenage Harry posing with his mom, all of them with his dimples popping out. The anger temporarily left my body and I spun around in circles as I took in everything in his room, from the black bed, to the nightstand table, to the dresser, to the white door, then to the glass balcony doors that showed a beautiful sight, even from here. 

My mouth was ajar by the time I turned to face Harry. I knew that he had come from money and that his house was big, but I had never imagined that a room could be this big and look this nice. I stared at Harry for a second, seeing he was watching me like a hawk, then I turned around and walked over to his bed. I ran my hand along his black bedspread that was soft beneath my fingers.

“Your room…” I whispered, thoroughly amazed at how simple, yet beautiful it was with the light decorations. I explored the room for a few more seconds, then walked over to the glass doors. I glanced over my shoulder at Harry, a voice in the back of my head telling me to ask him why he had brought me here, but the moment I opened the door and the cool breeze blew in, all my worries melted away.

I let the doors swing open and I stepped out onto the balcony. It was dark out here, but thanks to the bright moon, I was able to see the black steel that was perfectly weaved together, creating an entrapping pattern. The curtains blew past me when a sudden gust of air blew through the doors, and that was all it took before I stepped passed the door frame and onto the balcony.

The wind whipped around my body, making me wrap my arms tightly around my waist. It was windier than it had been a few minutes ago, strangely enough, but it felt good. I gazed out at his huge backyard, gasping when I seen that not only was it huge, but it was also surrounded by a thick forest.

In the dark the green seemed to seem even prettier, creating a beautiful contrast of bright and dark colors. Just above the top of the trees set the enormous moon that was glowing beautiful, lightening up everything I could see. “It’s beautiful,” I whispered to whoever was listening, my words being carried away by the wind as soon as they left my chapped lips.

I took a cautious step forward and wrapped my fingers around the cool metal, my fingertips running along the designs. “It is,” Harry whispered, his own eyes focused on something he thought was beautiful as I stared out at the sight I thought was beautiful. I turned to look up at Harry, discovering he was already staring at me.

“How can you get used to something like this?” A fog surrounded my face as I spoke, but quickly vanished when another gust of air blew.

“I’ll let you know when I do,”

“But, haven’t you been rich your entire life?” I knew that what I was asking was personal, and that it was none of my business, but I couldn’t help but asking. If he has yet to get used to something like this, and he has had many years to, then how could I ever get used to it after spending my life in poverty.

“No. When I was younger, my mum and dad split up because there was too many bills to pay from my mom’s med school, and my dad couldn’t take the stress,” He went from relaxed to unreadable, but when I looked into his eyes, I could see him screaming on the inside from the memories that still haunted him. I didn’t say anything, because I knew him saying that little bit was hard enough without having someone comment on it.

We set in silence for a minute, Harry staring out at nothing in particular while I stared at him. “My mum met Robin a few years later and they got married not too long after that,” Harry said, his voice sounding pained with each word he spoke.

I felt a heavy weight settling on my chest when his memories awakened my own, reminding me of my mother and sister that were at home, both of them either drunk or high out of their mind. “My dad left when I was just a few minutes away from my eighth birthday,” I said softly, images of my past resurfacing and forcing me to close my eyes.

Like a movie playing behind my eyelids, I seen my dad storming through the hallway, a suitcase in hand and his face bright red. I was sitting on the floor next to the table, a cake sitting right in front of me with eight blue candles in it. Lottie had been in the kitchen then, finding a lighter so my dad could light my candles like he did every year.

My dad looked at me when he reached the end of the hallway, his stormy eyes going soft for a split second before he grabbed his black suit jacket off of the hook. “Where are you going, Daddy?” I asked him, my cloth covered feet slipping on the ground when I scrambled to my feet.

I looked at his appearance, taking in his disheveled hair and loose tie that hung around his neck. I didn’t know why daddy was going out looking like that, and I didn’t know why his face was so red, but I didn’t have time to ask him before my mommy came running into the room. Her brown hair bounced with each step she took forward, her eyes rimmed with smeared mascara that ran down her cheeks.

“Please, don’t leave us,” I remember her pleading, tears slipping past her eyes as she desperetly grasped at my dad’s suit.

I remember watching him lift up his hand before he brought it down on her cheek, making her stumble backwards and collide with the wall. “Mommy!” I had shouted, running across the floor to help her to her feet but she pushed me away and went back to tugging at my daddy’s white shirt.

“Louis,” a voice shouted at me, dragging me out of my vivid memories that felt like they were drowning me. My chest was heaving and my eyes were blurry, but even in my distressed state, I could make out the shape in front of me and the arm on my shoulder that wouldn’t stop shaking me.

“I-I’m sorry,” I breathed out, quickly turning so I was once again facing the backyard. I furiously wiped at my eyes, cursing under my breath for letting myself get pulled in so deep to my past.

I swallowed thickly, trying to get rid of the ball of emotions that has planted itself in my throat, and focused on a low hanging branch on a tree that was randomly placed in Harry’s backyard. On the branch was two worn out ropes, and hanging to them was a black tire that had to be at least a few years old.

“We can…” He began, but I shook my head and lifted a hand up to signal for him to stop.

“Please, don’t. I don’t want to talk about it, and I never will. It’s silly of me to get so worked up about my past in the first place. I promise it won’t happen again.” I took in a deep breath and leaned forward, propping my arms up on the railing.

I had this painful knot in the pit of my stomach and I couldn’t get rid of it, no matter how much I tried. I tried thinking about anything and everything, ranging from the beautiful scenery from that park Harry had taken me to, to the birthday party he had thrown me. But all that does it make it worse, because it seems that the only good memories I have are with Harry, and if that isn’t a problem, then I don’t know what is.

The pains grew more as I just stood there, trying to fight off the unwanted images of my mother sitting in front of the door for a week straight before she realized he wasn’t coming back, and that he really was gone forever. I tried to not think about them, but the harder I tried, to more vivid they became and finally, the images became too much and I was vomiting out what very little contents I had in my stomach.

It burned as it came up, even more so because of the alcohol, and black dots appeared in my vision as another wave of nausea washed over me. Vomit trickled down my chin and ran down the side of the railing before it splattered on the cement below us, but I was too busy with the fact that my throat felt like it was on fire, as I continued to throw up, to care about that.

Ungodly sounds left my mouth as I limply rested against the railing, all of my weight being supported by it. I dry heaved for what seemed like forever, until my shaking body started to relax and I was left with god awful breath.

“Sorry,” I whispered under my breath, using the back of my hand to wipe the chunks off of my chin and mouth. I had been so preoccupied with what was going on with me, that I hadn’t realized the large hand on my back that was rubbing soothing circles into it until I went to turn around to face him.

Harry didn’t move his hand off my back, and I was thankful because it was helping with my aching muscles, but he did help me turn around slowly. “Don’t mention it,” he said, his eyes screaming sincerity. I swallowed, grimacing at the taste, and nodded my head slowly. “Why don’t we take you inside and you can get cleaned up while I run downstairs?” He made it sound like a question, but I knew better than that. He was more or less commanding me to get cleaned up, and I don’t blame him because I reeked like vomit.

With slow movements, Harry clasped my hand with his and lead me through to open doors, across his room and into the mysterious white door that I soon found out was a bathroom. He flicked on the light in the bathroom and my eyes instantly squinted from the bright lights, and by the time they adjusted, he was helping me sit down on the toilet that was right next to the door.

With jelly like arms, I tried to pull my puke splattered t-shirt up and over my head, but I had no strength whatsoever. I looked up at Harry and was about to ask him for help, but he was already leaning down and tugging the t-shirt over my head. I smiled smally up at him and toed off my shoes. The once simple task took a lot longer than usual, but only a few minutes later, I had both shoes and socks off and my pants were undone.

I blushed darkly, knowing I can’t get my pants down on my own but I didn’t want to ask Harry for help when I knew that meant that he would see my… area. I cleared my throat, instantly regretting it when it felt like I just coughed up lava, and used the wall to help me stand up on my weak legs.

_ Damn, puking takes a lot out of you. _

I kept one arm on the wall and used the other to gesture towards the door, silently telling Harry to leave but he didn’t. Instead, h dropped down to his knees and looped his fingers into the belt loops in my pants and tugged them down, his thumbs holding my underwear in place all the while. Without glancing up at me, he moved my arm to his shoulder for support, then lifted my one foot off the floor to remove my foot from the pant leg, then repeated the process with the other leg.

I glanced down at him through half open eyes, a smile tugging at my lips when I realized the first time I seen Harry Styles on his knees wasn’t at all what I had expected. “Thanks,” I whispered, my hand moving up to his cheek so I could cup it. I was tempted to lean down at peck his lips, but then I remembered what I looked, and smelt like, so I decided against it.

We stayed staring at each other for a few seconds, my watery blue eyes searching his warm, green ones that scream nothing but sympathy. Any other day I would have hated seeing that directed at me, but tonight, it made me feel good to see someone actually caring about me and actually worrying about my well being.

If I were at home and this were to happen, I would get told to shut up and clean the vomit up before I went to bed. That, or I would still have to cook a horrendous meal for the two made out of nothing but scraps that were carelessly thrown in the fridge. The thought alone had my stomach churning, so I quickly pushed it down and shook my head.

“Alright, I think I can take it from here,” I said, taking a step back so my penis wasn’t all in his face anymore. Harry smirked darkly, a dirty thought no doubt running through his mind, but quickly lifted his hands up in surrender when he seen the look I gave him, which was a warning look. He chuckled under his breath and stood up, then walked out of the bathroom and closed the door with one more glance in my direction.

I felt my heart flutter in my chest when I looked down and seen my clothes were neatly folded in a pile on the floor, my shoes being on top of the pile. I smiled softly, my stomach fluttering in a good way, and walked over to the bathtub that was enormous.

I twirled around the bathroom and took in the two sinks, shower that was conveniently placed in the middle of the room, and the wooden door that was on the wall opposite of the sinks, just a few feet away from where I was standing. Sighing under my breath, I debated on whether or not I wanted to take a shower or bath, but when I seen the shower was the one with the drain built into the floor, I couldn’t help myself, even though I knew my wobbly knees would be a problem.

I looked around the room once more, to make sure no one was in here, then pulled down my boxers. I blushed when the voice in the back of my head reminded me where I was, and what I was about to do. I bit my lip and threw my boxers over in the direction of my clothes, my barefeet sticking against the tiled floor as I walked across it and towards the shower.

When I reached it, I stepped into it, then pulled the shower curtain back so I was completely surrounded by nothing but red. I leaned over and turned the shower on, making it so the water was cold but not extremely cold. I sighed as the water washed over my body and chilled my skin, washing away any trace of what had happened tonight.

I turned around and tipped my head back, letting the water drench my hair and ruin the quiff. I hummed quietly and looked at the three bottles that were on the shelf. There was a shampoo, a conditioner, and a bottle of soap. All of which looked extremely expensive. I debated on whether or not to use them, but with one hand through my greasy hair, I knew I needed to.

Biting my lip, I picked up the shampoo bottle and clicked the lid open, then squirted a small amount into my hand. I set the bottle down on the shelf, then lathered the shampoo into my hair, the room soon filling with a delicious scent that I couldn’t quite put my finger on, but it was heavenly.

I rinsed my hair out, then did the same thing with the conditioner. When that was out of the way, I quickly washed my body with my hand, refusing to use his blue scrunchy without his permission, and washed the suds off before I stepped out. Unlike when I usually take normal showers, I stepped out into air that was warmer than the shower I just took, and I felt myself shiver at the sudden temperature change.

“Where’s a towel,” I mumbled under my breath, soon spotting a white, fluffy towel on the shelf next to the sink. I carefully walked over to it, making sure I wouldn’t slip, and grabbed the towel off the shelf. I wrapped it around my waist and eyed my pile of clothes in disgust. A shower had been a good idea, up until the moment I realized I had no clothes.

Grasping the edge of my towel, I walked over to the door I thought was the door that lead back into Harry’s room, but I was instead walking into a gigantic closet. My mouth fell open when I seen how big his closet was. There was rows upon rows of clothes, and in the far back of the closet, there was shelves of shoes.

“Holy fuck,” I gasped, walking further into the closet so I could see everything better. His closet was organized by not only colors, but style too. In the front was the clothes he wore to school, then in the middle was his dress clothes, and in the back was his pajamas and clothes that he would wear to lounge around the house in.

I gripped my towel tighter and walked towards the shelf of his clothes that weren’t so nice. I glanced behind my shoulder, knowing I would be in trouble if I got caught, before I grabbed a large blue shirt and a pair of grey joggers that looked like they would drown me. I shrugged and slung them over my shoulder, then walked out of the closet and over to the other door.

I slowly opened it, then peaked my head in to make sure Harry wasn’t in there. When I seen his room was empty, and the balcony doors were closed with the curtains shut, I walked in and set the clothes on his bed, then quickly scurried over to his dresser and pulled out a pair of black boxers. I wasted no time with pulling them on, honestly being shocked that they fit me perfectly.

I took the towel off and towel dried my body, then my hair before I threw the towel on the edge of his bed, next to his clothes. I tugged on his joggers, having to tie them extremely tight for them to even stay up on my hips, then pulled on his shirt that was ten times to big.

Water droplets rolled down my face and landed on his shirt, creating dark patches that littered the material. I shook my head, droplets flying everywhere, and tugged up the joggers a little before I grabbed the towel and walked back into his bathroom. I placed the towel in his hamper, then looked at myself in the mirror.

There was still a faint line of black smudging my eyes, but no matter how much I tried to rub it off it wasn’t coming off. Sighing in defeat, I grabbed his hair brush off the counter next to one of his sinks and ran it through my dripping wet hair. I had just finished brushing my teeth and was about to leave the bathroom when a white toothbrush caught my eye.

I knew I shouldn’t do it, that it was disgusting on so many levels, but with vomit still coating my tongue, I decided I needed to. With an uneasy feeling in my stomach, I grabbed the toothbrush and searched through the cupboards for a the toothpaste, finally finding in the left cupboard. With shaking hands, I squirted a little toothpaste onto the toothbrush and then I began to brush my teeth.

Mint exploded in my mouth and thankfully masked the taste of vomit. I closed my eyes and quickly brushed my teeth, not daring to glance at myself in the mirror because I knew the guilt would be too much too handle.

I rinsed my mouth once I was finished, put everything back where I found it, then walked out of the room. Harry still wasn’t in here, so I set down on the right side of his bed and leaned against the headboard, my eyelids becoming droopy the longer I waited for him to return.

I had thought that my thoughts would go wild the minutes I stopped trying to keep my mind busy, but when I finally relaxed enough to do that, my mind was shutting down. Sleep began to take over and I was falling deeper and deeper into a state of unconsciousness. As much as I wanted to wait for Harry to return, I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer and I was soon pulled down into the wonderful blissfulness of quiet dreams.

I didn’t know when Harry returned, or if he even did, but for the first night in a long time, my dreams were completely silenced and I didn’t have one pair of green eyes pop up, or one bad nightmare of my dad leaving. Everything was gone for the night, and deep down, I wished that this is how the rest of my life would be.

_ Except for the exception of a kind hearted, curly haired boy that will inevitably steal my heart, if he hasn’t already. _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	23. Chapter 23

**Harry’s POV:**

I stared at the sleeping boy on my bed, my eyes dancing over his soft, delicate features, to the oversized clothes he was wearing. I smiled softly and walked over to his side of the bed, stopping for a moment when I reached him and seen his eyelids flutter like he was going to open them. I held my breath, anxiously waiting for him to open his eyes and catch me being a creeper, but he didn’t.

All that happened is his eyelids fluttered and his mouth fell open, a small sigh escaping past his dry lips. I exhaled deeply and leaned over, brushing his damp hair off of his forehead before I placed a gentle kiss on the side of his head, just above his eyebrow. He mumbled something in his sleep and nuzzled his forehead against my hand, then went limp once again.

Smiling to myself, I carefully pulled the blanket out from underneath him, then pulled it up so it was covering his body, only the top of his head being visible. Carefully, I grasped his feet and scooted him down the bed a little further, so his head wasn’t pressed against the headboard. I tucked the blanket around his body before I walked over to my side of the bed.

I eyed the platter that was on my nightstand table, knowing that Louis wouldn’t be waking up soon so I might as well through the soup out. I picked up the bowl and walked over to the balcony doors. The doorknob was cool in my hand when I twisted it, a strong breeze blowing through the doors as soon as I opened them.

“Jesus,” I mumbled under my breath. Quickly, I dumped the soup of the edge of the railing, then I retreated back into my warm bedroom. I yawned quietly and set the bowl on my dresser, right next to a picture of my mom and me from when I was in kindergarten.

I rubbed my eyes and walked back over to the bed, though I set down on my side this time. The mattress formed around my butt as soon as I set down, relaxing my aching spine. I sighed deeply and laid back, my head resting on the pile of pillows that was right next to Louis’. I lulled my head to the side and stared at him, drinking in as much of him as I could before I had to turn off the light.

I admired the way his long eyelashes fanned across his cheekbones, and the way his upper lip twitched with each breath he took. Small snores escaped past his lips, and if it had been anyone else, I would have covered their face with a pillow. Snoring, to me, has never been adorable in any sort of way, up until tonight. Then again, anything this small boy does I think is adorable, or completely annoying, but the difference is one I can never tell.

Letting my eyes linger on him for a second longer, I rolled over onto my back and clapped quietly, the room soon being enveloped in completely darkness. My chest rose and fell quickly, but the longer I laid there, listening to Louis breath, the steadier my breathing became until we were in sync, the rise and fall of both of our chests matching.

A small smile graced my lips and finally, I was succumbed in to sleep. My head fell to the side and my lips parted, the last coherent thought being one of Louis, and the way he looked wrapped up in my oversized t-shirt.

\--------

There was someone talking in a hushed voice only inches away from me. I could feel their breath tickling my neck, and I could hear their words in my ears, but I was still trapped in my sleep state, so nothing they said made any sense. I knew I should listen, that it was probably something important that my mother needed to tell me, but I was tired. I couldn’t even muster up the will to open my eyelids, and I didn’t want to. I wanted to fall back asleep, to be dead to the world for a few minutes longer.

And it would have happened, too. If my bloody brain wouldn’t have reminded me  _ who  _ I fell asleep by lastnight. As soon as his name ran through my mind, I was fully awake and bolting up in bed. The covers slipped off my body and I looked around the room, my eyes wide but still heavy with sleep. Finally, I looked at the small body next to me, watching as it curled back and hid under the heavy blanket.

“Louis,” I breathed out, my voice thick with sleep. I cleared my throat and turned so I was facing him, my legs slipping underneath my blanket. I could feel his cool toes as they brushed against my calf, the touch alone being enough to send me back into my frantic state, but somehow, I remained calm and somewhat sane.

“Good morning, sleepy head,” he said, giggling shortly after and if that wasn’t the most beautiful noise I have ever heard, then I have no idea what is.

“Morning,” I yawned out, grimacing when I inhaled through my nose and smelt my disgusting morning breath.

I looked at Louis, expecting him to come out from underneath the covers so I could see more than his eyes, but he wouldn’t move. His face stayed hidden, but his eyes continued to dart from my face, down to wherever, then back up to my face. Out of curiosity, I glanced down and grinned when seen what had him so frightened.

“Wha’? Never seen morning wood before?” I asked, moving my hips a little so my cock bobbed in my boxers. It wasn’t until I had looked down and seen my tented underwear, that I realized my pants had been taken off in the middle of the night and thrown at the end of the bed. It wasn’t too shocking, though, considering I have sleep stripped before.

“First of all, you are disgusting, and second of all no! I have never seen morning wood on another person,” He shrieked, the blanket falling down to his lap when he flung his arms around to make what he was saying even more dramatic.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Disgusting because i’m not ashamed with my package.” Rolling my eyes, I scooted to the edge of the bed and climbed down. “Now, if you need me, don’t. I’ll be in the bathroom.” With that said, I walked across my room and towards my bathroom door.

Without giving in and glancing at him one last time, I walked into the dark room and closed the door behind me before I flicked on the light and turned to the toilet. I quickly took a piss, ridding myself of my ‘disgusting morning wood’. I flushed the toilet and went to walk over to the sink, but my foot got hooked on something and had stuff flying across the floor.

I cursed under my breath and looked down, seeing Louis’ soiled clothes were now scattered out across my floor. I mumbled profanities under my breath and walked over to the sink, not even bothering to clean up my mess. With what little patients I had left this morning, I quickly brushed my teeth, choosing to ignore that it was on the counter rather than in my tooth brush holder, and returned to my room.

Louis was still on my bed, though this time he was sprawled across it and his tummy was slightly visible due to his shirt rising up. “The bathrooms all yours,” I mumbled quietly. He waved a hand in my direction, then let it rest on the visible patch of skin on his tummy.

“I already used it,” yeah, and my toothbrush too.

Brushing the thought off, I walked around my bed and set down on my side, there still being plenty of room between me and Louis. “So….” I said, dragging out the ‘o’. I had no idea how I was supposed to react, or what I was supposed to say. The only time I have ever woken up with someone in my bed was that one time I got extremely drunk back where I used to live and drug that older guy home with me.

But even then it wasn’t this awkward. Well, it wasn’t for me. As soon as I woke up, I woke his ass up too and kicked him out. I found it quite funny watching someone scrambling to get their pants on as they’re running down the street. It is something I will never get to see again, or at least I hope I won’t.

“What?” He asked, lulling his head to look at me.

“What, what?”

“You said so,” oh, right. I did say so.

Shit. What the hell am I supposed to say? Am I supposed to ask him if i’m taking him home, or am I just supposed to give him his clothes and send him on his way, hoping that he won’t die on his long journey home.

“Stop staring at me like that,” Louis snapped, dragging me out of my rambling thoughts.

“Like what?” I asked, honestly having no idea how I was staring at him. I thought I was staring at nothing in particular as I tried to think of what I was going to do, but based on the way he looks and sounds, I wasn’t.

“Like i’m a one night stand you’re dying to get rid of,” he whispered, and this time he didn’t sound so ferocious. He sounded more hurt than anything, and it made my heart hurt. I didn’t want him to feel like I wanted to get rid of him, nor did I want him to think he was just a one night stand. He was much more to me than that, and besides, I couldn’t even really consider him a one night stand because we technically didn’t do anything but sleep.

_ Like I said, I am shit in these situations. _

“Oh come on, I wasn’t looking at you like that. I was just wondering if you would need a ride home later,” I said, only speaking half the truth. I didn’t want to tell him exactly what I was thinking and chance hurting him even more, so I decided I would spare his feelings and twist the truth.

Rolling his eyes, because he apparently caught onto my not so subtle save, Louis rolled over onto his stomach and flung his legs over the bed, then stood up. “You can take me home now,” He said, puffing out his chest as he stomped around my bed and towards my door.

I laughed at how winsome he looked with his chest puffed out and his head held high. I waited until he walked past me before I grabbed his arm and tugged him towards me, making it so he collided with my chest and we both fell back against the bed. “You are not leaving yet,” I wheezed out, my breath getting knocked out when he had fell on me.

“Especially not in my clothes,” I added when I caught my breath, a smirk tugging at my lips when he blushed.

Grabbing a hold of his waist, I flipped us over so I was now the one hovering over him, one of my legs being in between both of his, and one of my hands caressing his cheek. I stared down at him, my eyes flickering between his lips and his eyes. I went to lean down to kiss him, but as soon as my lips got close to his, he turned his head so my lips came in contact with his cheek.

“You are not kissing me,” he chimed, sounding as stubborn as ever.

“Oh, and why not?” Come on, give me one bloody kiss.

“Because, I’m saving myself for marriage,”

The corner of my mouth tipped up and my eyebrows sank into a disbelieving gaze. “You’re what?” I asked, scoffing at the idea of him not kissing me again until I married him, which I never would.

If my eyes would have strayed from him for even a second, I never would have caught the twitch of his lip and the humor dancing in his eyes. “You’re a little shit,” I playfully growled, my hand pushing his cheek so he was once again facing me.

Without giving him a chance to think about it, I dipped down and captured his lips in a kiss. My lips moved against his for a few seconds and finally, he melted into the mattress and his hands flew up and fisted into my hair, his own lips moving against mine and giving me the chance to taste his mint flavored breath, confirming what I had already known.

I slid my hand down his cheek, my fingers skimming across his neck and cloth covered torso before I finally reached the end of his shirt. I slipped my hand up his shirt, my fingers gently gliding across his stomach and exploring every inch of smooth skin I could possibly reach while he would allow me. I discovered that he had sharp hip bones, and that he had a deep arch in his back, and that if you brushed the skin just above his ass crack, he would bow beneath you.

Sounds I have never found so arousing left his mouth with every light touch and swipe of my tongue. I swallowed each and every one of them eagerly, not knowing when I would be able to hear them again. I lightly traced his spine with the tips of my fingers, mesmerizing each dip and curve of it.

“Harry,” Louis moaned loudly against my lips, his back arching even further up and making his chest hit mine. I pressed my lips against his once again, trying to keep him quiet so no one else would hear these wonderful noises, noises that only I will ever hear.

Tugging at my hair, Louis maneuvered himself beneath me and wrapped his legs around my waist before he grinded his ass against my growing erection. This time it was me that moaned. A broken, high pitched noise floated past my lips, only to be covered by Louis’ more powerful moan, which had my body shaking above his.

I could feel my penis as it became fully hard, precum leaking from my slit and making my boxers stick to me. I wanted to press myself against him, to give into the urge and to fuck him right here and now, but a part of me knew that I couldn’t, that he wasn’t ready. “W-We should p-probably stop,” I stuttered against Louis’ lips once I found the willpower to break our kiss.

Louis whimpered and rubbed his ass against my dick again. “I want you,” he moaned, his fingers curling even tighter in my hair, making it so I couldn’t pull back without hurting myself.

“Louis, you’re not ready,” I growled through clenched teeth. It was taking every ounce of self control I had to not just pull down his pants and fuck him right now, to give him what he wants. His ass was pressing against my most sensitive area, and I could feel the heat he was radiating from being so turned on.

“You don’t get to decide that, Harry. I’m ready, please,” he begged, his head lifting up so he could attempt to kiss me once again, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t continue this knowing where it would eventually lead, and knowing that he would possibly regret it.

I stared into his disappointed blue eyes and shook my head, watching as every single ounce of fight left his eyes. He was giving up. He was giving up fighting with me about this, and he was likely giving up with everything.

“You don’t want me like that?” The question was followed by a choked sobbed. I felt my heart constrict painfully at the noise. How could I do this? How could I be the one who caused him to sound so broken, to  _ look  _ so broken?

“Of course…” I tried to speak, but I couldn’t be heard above his crying, and I didn’t want to shout. I knew that would only upset him more, but I had to do something. I had to shut him up, and I had to do it without hurting him, or scaring him.

Despite my mind telling me not to, I reached down between us and grasped his aching cock in my hand. I felt as it throbbed quickly, etching an unfamiliar rhythm into my palm. Louis gasped loudly and bowed his back, his lips parting as he moaned loudly and thrusted his hips upwards.

“Don’t move,” I growled, figuring that if I was going to do this I was going to do it properly. I scooted down the bed, keeping Louis’ member firmly in my hand, and stopped when my butt was resting on top of his calfs.

Keeping my eyes focused on his visible navel, I let go of his penis long enough so I could tug down his boxers, watching as it sprung freely once it escaped the tight confinement of his boxer, before it fell against his tummy and laid there, throbbing and leaking precum on my shirt. I wasted no time in touching him, my palms itching to feel his thick, but slightly smaller, penis in my hand.

“Be quiet,” I whispered in a somewhat commanding voice. Swallowing thickly, I looked up at Louis from underneath my eyelashes and just as our eyes locked, I wrapped my hand around his dick and began to slowly move it up and down in a teasing, yet pleasurable rhythm.

A moan lodged itself in my throat when I watched the scene in front of me unfold. Louis’ eye’s widened, his pupils blown and completely covering his iris, and he let out a choked moan. I bit my lip and looked down at my hand, my thumb dipping into his slit so I could collect some precum to make my hand move a little more smoothly.

The clear liquid coated my thumb before I spread it along his shaft, making my movements even easier. “Harry,” Louis moaned loudly, and out of the corner of my eye, I seen his hands fist in the sheets, his knuckles turning a white color.

I tried not to focus on my own cock that was throbbing painfully in my tight underwear, precum leaking down my inner thigh. I shifted my hips a little, trying to maneuver my penis, and had just set back down again when I felt something warm, and sticky, landing on my hand and splattering down the back of it.

“HARRY!” Louis scream at the top of his lungs, his eyes screwing shut and his face scrunching up in complete pleasure as I continued to move my hand up and down, riding him through his orgasm. My hand had jerked a little when the cum had first hit my hand, partly out of shock, but mostly from the beautiful nose that came out of the beautiful boy.

When his body slumped back against the mattress, I let go of his limp penis and stood up, quickly scurrying to the bathroom. I washed my hands as quickly as I could, then got a towel wet with warm water. I ringed it as best as I could, my breaths coming out in short, shallow puffs as my ears began to ring from my own problem in my pants.

I shook my head and walked out of the bathroom, not glancing at myself in the mirror, and glanced at the small boy that was still lying on my bed. His boxers were pulled down to his thighs, hugging them tightly, and cum was splattered along his torso, just above where his now soft penis laid.

“Just rest,” I whispered to him, kissing one of his hips bones before I gently began to clean him up. When I was finished, I pulled his boxers back up, ignoring his pants that had somehow managed to make their way onto the floor, and carefully set him up so I could pull the soiled shirt off of him.

He mumbled incoherent things to me and sighed happily when I laid him back down against the mattress, a dopey smile stretching his lips. I smiled softly and shook my head, throwing the ruined shirt into the corner of the room, along with the washcloth. I climbed back up on the bed and laid next to Louis, my hand stretching out so it was lightly brushing against Louis.

I didn’t grab his hand. Instead, I waited for him to extend his hand and grab mine, but he never did. We just laid there, my erection soon going away and leaving my with sharp pains in my lower stomach and penis. I didn’t say anything though, because I didn’t want him to feel like he owed me anything, like he had to do to me what I did to him.

I wasn’t going to pressure him into anything he didn’t want to do. I wanted to take this at his pace, even if that meant I will be giving him hand jobs for the rest of my life. It would be worth it. It would be way more than worth it, actually.

**Louis POV:**

My arms and legs were complete jelly. I couldn’t move anything, no matter how hard I tried. My mind was hazy and I felt like I was floating on cloud nine. It was a wonderful feeling, one I have never felt before, even when I wanked off myself.

I couldn’t explain it, but the way it felt to have Harry’s hand wrapped around me was amazing. So amazing that I couldn’t even be bothered by the fact that I had just had my first orgasm in front of someone, and I had just received my first handjob.

I could feel Harry’s hand lightly pressing against mine, but I couldn’t do anything about it until at least five minutes passed by and my body began to regain feeling. My fingers twitched a little and finally, I was able to inch my hand a little closer to Harry’s and wrap my fingers around his. We weren’t holding hands completely, but we were holding fingers and that was enough for me.

“Thank you,” I whispered lazily, my eyes staying closed as I relished in the way I felt for a little longer.

“Don’t mention,” He said, his voice quiet like it always got when he was lost in thought. I didn’t even have to question what was on his mind, because I knew what his problem was. He had blue balls, and I had no idea if I was ready to help him with it yet. I mean, up until twenty minutes ago I wasn’t even sure I was ready to be naked in front of him yet, yet here I am, half naked in my post-orgasm state.

“Do…” I began, but instantly shut up when Harry’s bedroom door opened and someone cleared their throat.

Both Harry and I shot up, our hands flying away from each other. Harry slid down the bed a little, putting a little space between us, and I glanced at the door. A woman was standing in it, her shoulder length dark brown hair flowing around her shoulders. She stared at me, her green eyes moving over my face, down to my bare chest and torso, then back up to my face.

We locked eyes for a second, but she quickly ripped her eyes away and looked at Harry. I exhaled deeply and clenched my hands into fists at my sides. I was stalk still in my seat, my body tense due to the awkward atmosphere. I waited for someone to yell out ‘awkward’, figuring that it was bound to come soon but all that happened was she walked into the room and closed the door behind her.

“And who may this be?” she asked Harry, gesturing towards me though she was still staring at him. I swallowed thickly and looked at Harry pleadingly, silently begging him not to tell her what had just happened, and to not mention anything about me. I just wanted him to make his mom disappear so I could get dressed and leave.

“Louis, this is my mum. Mum, this is Louis.” Harry didn’t even glance in my direction when he introduced me to his mother. I poked my cheek with my tongue and scoffed under my breath, my eyes casting to the floor.

I wanted to stay looking at the floor, but a voice in the back of my head was telling me to stop being a coward and to show this woman that I could handle my own, that I wasn’t weak. I bit my tongue harshly, practically being able to taste the blood that has yet to seep out of my tongue, and looked back up at the woman that was Harry’s mum.

“Hello, I’m Louis Tomlinson,” I said with as much courage as I could muster up, but my voice still wavered. I stood up and extended a hand, which she took and shook softly before she let go and let her arm fall limply at her side.

“Anne Twist,” She said to me, but she was still eyeing Harry.

I knew that look all too well. It was a look a mother gave her child when she was disappointed in them, but didn’t want to voice her disapproval because she knew now wasn’t the time. I knew that I was the reason for that look, that if I would have made Harry take me home last night that I wouldn’t have had this awkward meeting with his mother, and he wouldn't be getting in trouble.

“Urm…” I began, scratching the back of my neck as I searched the room for an escape. “I need to use the restroom.” I rushed out, quickly spinning around so I could close and hide behind the bathroom door.

Once the door was closed, I felt the tension leave my body and I relaxed. I held my breath and pressed my ear against the door, trying to listen in on what they were saying to see if anything was to be said about me.

“What were you thinking Harry,” Anne hissed under her breath, the bed creaking slightly from her weight as she most likely sat down on it.

“I wasn’t thinking, is that what you want to hear?” Harry hissed right back, but if i’m being honest, his sounded a lot more terrifying than hers did.

I pressed my palms against the door, my cheek pressing against it as well so I could try and hear better. “No, Harry. I want to hear what was running through your mind when you brought him here last night! I thought you were done with that! I thought that when we moved down here things would be different. You promised you wouldn’t do this anymore,”

_ Wait, hold up. Do what? What was she talking about? _

“I haven’t had sex with anyone down here, if that’s what you’re talking about,” I wanted to open the bathroom door and smack the smug look off of Harry’s face, which I knew that he most likely had, and I wanted to tell him to stop rolling his eyes at his mother for her just trying to protect her son.

“I just walked into your room and there was a half naked boy on you….”

“He’s different! I haven’t had sex with him, and I won’t be for a while. Jesus! Why does everything always have to be about sex with you!” Harry shouted, and his voice practically shook the walls. I jumped back, my heart thumping away in my chest.

I felt my chest grow tight as memories of my own mother yelling at me surfaced. My breathing increased, my chest rising and falling quickly. I held my hand over my heart and tried to take deep breathes to calm myself down, but my body froze when the bathroom door opened and I was being tugged out of the room by a large hand, that was honestly using a lot of force.

He pulled me into the middle of the room, making it so I was facing his mum and only a few feet away from where she was sitting on the bed. “Have we had sex?” Harry asked me, and I could already tell how irritated he was just by him speaking.

I blushed furiously and looked up at him, my face falling when I seen how serious he looked. “No why,” I whispered, shaking my head softly. I looked at him questioningly, having no idea why he was asking me these questions.

“Have I tried having sex with you?”

“No, why?”

“Do you want to have sex?”

I gasped and scoffed at the same time, the mixture causing me to cough. “No! I told you…” I clamped my mouth shut when I realized that his mum was still in the room, and that it wasn’t just the two of us, which is why he's asking me these questions. “Ohhhh, I mean, no. I don’t want to have sex yet,” I said, sounding as confident as I felt which wasn’t much.

_ Talk about being the slowest one in the room. _

I nodded my head and looked up at Harry, a small smile slipping onto my lips when I seen he was staring at me. Slowly, but surely, a smile slipped onto his face as well and he took a step towards me, but something must have reminded him of where we were because he took a step back and looked back at his mum, his face going back to an unreadable one.

I sighed sadly and looked at his mum as well, seeing she was glancing between the two of us and a smile was threatening her lips. And, just like someone flipped a switch, all disappointment left her face and she now looked like a proud mother bear that just witnessed her child catch it’s first fish on it’s own.

“He’s different,” Harry said, repeating what he told his mom earlier. Without glancing at him, I walked towards him and wrapped my fingers around his, to show her that I not only was proud to hold his hand, but that I was also willing to hold his hand and defend him.

“I can see that now,” She whispered, her eyes glossing over like she was going to cry. Without another word said to me or Harry, she climbed off the bed and left the room, leaving the door open. I could hear her as she walked down the hallway, her almost silent sniffles echoing in the hallways.

Looking up at Harry, I smiled and stood up on my tippy toes to peck his cheek, because I figured that we had won. I figured that just by me holding his hand showed her that I was different, I guess. Different how, I don’t know. But I still knew that, despite my lack of knowledge with Harry’s past relationships, that I was indeed different.

  
  



	24. Chapter 24

I watched as articles of clothing flew around the room, creating a small circle around me that slowly started to spread out, turning a once small mess into a large clothing disaster. “Harry, I already told you that the sweatpants and shirt are fine,” I said, sighing as I watched him glare at me from over his shoulder, a stripped red and white shirt in his hand.

“You jizzed on those,” he growled, tossing the shirt at me before he returned to digging through his enormous closet. I rolled my eyes at his reminder and bent down, grabbing the red shirt along with a pair of red skinny jeans, which didn’t look like something Harry would wear. Looking at him one last time, I shook my head and walked into the bathroom, then closed the door behind me.

I walked across the cool, tile floor, my bare feet sticking to it and making an obnoxious noise with each step I took. I stopped in front of the mirror and glanced at my reflection, cringing when I seen my disheveled hair, pale face and eyes still slightly rimmed with black eyeliner. Sighing, I quickly got dressed in the clothes I had stole from Harry, me still being almost completely nude, and grabbed a towel off the rack before I turned on the water.

I blinked a few times, my eyes being dry from my contacts, and bent down, my free hand cupping to catch the cool water. I splashed it on my face, sighing as the water cooled down my warm skin and ran down my cheeks, then dripped off of my chin. I squoze my eyes shut tightly and rubbed my eyes with water, then turned it off. Blowing some of the water off my lips, I took a step back and quickly lifted the towel up the my face to collect the remaining water.

Once my face was dry, I set the towel on the counter and looked back up at myself in the mirror. I ran my hands through my hair, trying to brush it off to the side, but finally gave up when I realized it wasn’t going to cooperate. Shaking my head, I turned around and began to walk towards Harry’s bedroom door, but nearly tripped and fell on my ass.

Grunting, I looked down and seen that the pants, which were obviously too small for Harry, had fit my body perfectly, but were about a feet too long. I huffed deeply and kneeled down. “Stupid shit, I bet Harry never has to roll his pants up,” I grumbled under my breath as I rolled the pants up so they were no longer ten sizes too long.

When I was finished, I nodded in approval and walked into his bedroom, my eyes instantly landing on the pile of clothes in the corner of the room. A dark blush tinted my cheeks when I seen the dark patches on the shirt, knowing that my cum had dried on it and ruined it. Biting my lip, I looked around Harry’s room, my eyes lingering on his dresser. Well, the small bottle that was on his dresser.

Grinning to myself, I tiptoed over to the dresser and grabbed the bottle. I read over the front, but didn’t recognize the guy, or the name of the cologne, which was Tom Ford, Oud Fleur. Shrugging, I took the top off and sprayed a little on the front of my shirt, figuring that it was Harry’s cologne that I loved, but the moment I inhaled deeply, I realized I made a big mistake.

The cologne reeked of old wood, strong spices, and roses. I gagged loudly and set the bottle down before I plugged my nose and used my other hand to try and waft the smell off, and away, from me. My eyes began to water as I held my breath longer, not wanting to breath in the wretched scent I was hoping would be the cologne Harry said was his.

Taking a deep breath in through my mouth, I picked the bottle up again and looked over it, my curiosity getting the best of me because I wanted to know how much money I just spent on a little bit of perfume I sprayed. I had looked over the entire bottle, trying to find the price tag, but I couldn’t find it anywhere and I was just about to set it back down when my pinky brushed over a loose piece of sticky paper on the bottom of it.

Chewing on my lip, I tipped it upside down, my eyeballs nearly popping out of my skull when I seen the large number on the small, white price tag. “Six hundred dollars,” I gasped loudly, finding the price absolutely ridiculous for something that was so small and smelled so bad.

“My mum loves that one, and I don’t have the heart to tell her how horrid it smells,” A voice rang out from behind me, causing me to jump, drop the bottle on the dresser, and spin around.

“Harry,” I breathed out, my hands gripping the edge of his dresser as I watched him walk closer to me until he was finally only a foot away.

“You were looking for this one,” He said, pulling the drawer to his dresser open before he pulled out a small bottle with black leather covering the middle and bottom of it, and the top of the bottle was clear, revealing the clear liquid. I read the front of the bottle, discovering it was Creed Aventus. I locked the name in my brain, determined to save up however much it was so I could have my own bottle.

“Here,” He said, taking off the cap before he lifted it up, like he was going to spray it on me. I closed my eyes and tilted my chin, soon hearing three spurts before the delicious fragrant finally reached my nose. I inhaled deeply, any sign of the previous cologne gone as this cologne spread throughout the room and clung to my clothes.

“It smells wonderful,” I found myself admitting, too lost in the scent to care about anything I said.

Slowly, I opened my eyes and tilted my head down, smiling when I seen Harry was watching me, a small smile on his plump lips. “Glad you like it,” he murmured, his smile growing even wider when I inhaled even deeper, relishing in the familiar scent.

“You look good, by the way,” he said, his green orbs roaming over my body before they locked with mine. I blushed lightly and looked down, then back up at him.

“I do, don’t I?” I asked, doing a half curtsy. I giggled quietly and smiled up at him, feeling absolutely ridiculous that I actually just curtsied in front of him.

I wrapped my arms around my waist and sighed quietly, just standing there like an idiot as Harry continued to stare at me. “Let’s go, shall we?” he finally asked after a few seconds passed by with his eyes glued to my body. I nodded and, without waiting for him, walked over to the door and opened it.

“Grab my phone,” I hollered over my shoulder as I walked out of his bedroom. There really was no need for me to be quiet anymore, considering his mother already knew I was here. I cringed at the memory of her walking in on us, and what made all of this worse, was that I was in nothing but my boxers and I hadn’t realized it until Harry told me to get dressed after she had left.

Shaking off the memory, I carefully took one stair at the time, but despite my slow pace, I still found myself out of breath by the time I reached the bottom stair. “Jesus, I need to work out more,” I panted underneath my breath, my hands resting on my knees as I leaned forward, my butt pressed against the wall at the bottom of the stairs.

I breathed in and out, my breathing soon slowing down and returning to normal. I stood up, my eyes floating up the stairs when I heard someone running down them, sounding much like a herd of animals was trampling down the stairs. I rolled my eyes when I seen it was Harry, but I couldn’t help the fond smile that stretched my lips.

“Harry, breakfast is finished.” Anne said, suddenly appearing at the bottom of the stairs, only a few feet in front of me. I jumped back and turned to look at her, finding she was already looking at me. “You’re welcome to join us, Louis,” she said, smiling softly at me before she turned around and walked out of sight.

I swallowed thickly and looked up at Harry, who looked lost in thought. Suddenly, he grabbed my arm and tugged me closer to him. “Don’t worry about Robin and my sister,” he whispered in my ear before he began to drag me towards the direction his mom went in.

We walked for what seemed like forever, my shorter legs trying to keep up with his long legs. He finally pushed open a door and pulled me into a kitchen, but we didn’t stop there. We walked through the kitchen and into another room where a large table was set, a young woman sitting on one side with Anne, and an older man was sitting at the front of the table, his back to us.

I gripped the bottom of Harry’s shirt and let him lead me to the table. He pulled out a chair for me and once I was set down, he pushed my chair in, then took the seat next to mine, sitting between me and the older man, who I was guessing was Robin. I instantly looked down at the table, my eyes landing on my white empty plate that had gold swirls around the edge of it.

There was at least three different forks, and next to those were spoons, and on the opposite side there were three sharp, but dull looking knifes with a gold handle. I bit my lip and glanced over at Harry, seeing he was already putting food on his plate. I was shocked when I seen how little he was going to eat, but I wasn’t going to comment on it. He finished placing a little bit of everything on the plate, while I just sat there staring at him, before he leaned over and took my plate, then put the full plate in it’s place.

“Thank you,” I whispered to him, my hand falling on his thigh. I gave it a small squeeze and was about to retract my hand, but before I could, he grabbed my hand in his and laced our fingers together, then let our joined hands rest on his thigh.

“Eat,” was the only thing he whispered to me before he began to fix his own plate. I looked down at my plate, seeing there was scrambled eggs, bacon, pancakes and a little scoop of strawberries.

My stomach grumbled, thankfully quiet enough that nobody heard. Biting my lip hard, I lifted my hand up to grab a fork, but I had no idea which one to grab. “Just grab the middle one, dear,” Anne said from across the table, making a blush darken my cheeks.

I glanced up at her and smiled a half smile, then grabbed the middle fork like she instructed. It was oddly heavy, despite its small appearance, but I figured all the weight was in the large, yet beautiful handle. It felt odd that I was holding something that was probably so expensive in my hand, but when I felt Harry squeeze my hand encouragingly, I pushed down my feelings and scooped up some eggs.

I lifted it up to my lips and slowly closed my mouth around the metal fork, then pulled the fork out. The eggs weighed heavily on my tongue, and I just sat a few seconds with them filling my mouth before I slowly began to chew. Pepper exploded in my mouth, followed by a rich taste of something I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I chewed the eggs eagerly, a moan threatening to escape past my lips.

“Good, aren’t they?” Harry asked, his lips right by my ear. I nodded and ate another bite, choosing not to respond to him.

We, or I ate, in silence. The rest of them talked every now and again, but I was never apart of their conversation and I was honestly happy about that. I was uncomfortable enough sitting in here, with all of them around me while I eat, so talking was honestly the last thing I wanted to do.

I managed to eat half of the pancake Harry gave me, all of the strawberries, all of the bacon, and some of the eggs before my stomach felt as if it was going to burst. I pushed my plate in front of me and leaned back in the chair, our hands sliding up Harry’s thigh a little and making it so they now rested with my hand pressing against his stomach.

I kept my eyes on my plate of food, honestly being proud of myself that I managed to eat so much. Usually, all I was able to eat was a piece of toast before I felt myself getting sick, so my almost empty plate was something that made me beyond proud of myself.

“Harry, why don’t you help Robin clear the table?” Anne asked, her fork clanking on her plate as she set it down.

“Do I have to?” Harry asked, though it came out more of a whine.

“Yes, Harold, you do,” I said, speaking up before Anne could. All of their heads snapped in my direction, everyone’s eyes focusing on me in both shock and amusement. I cupped my hand over my mouth when I realized what I had said. I had just told Harry that he had to help clear the table, while I was only a guest in his house.

“Sor…” I began to say, but was interrupted when Harry sighed loudly and stood up from the table, my hand falling limp at my side when he let go of it and began to grab everyone’s empty plates, mine and his being the first ones he grabbed.

I watched as Robin followed after him, both of their arms filled with plates by the time they left the dining room. The girl, who I think Harry said was his sister, excused herself from the table and walked through the same door me and Harry had come through, leaving only me and Anne at the table with an awkward silence filling the room.

“He likes you, you know?” Anne said, her soft voice just above a whisper.

I looked up at her and tilted my head to the side. “I don’t think he likes me. He.. he tolerates me,” I said, hesitating a little before I finally said what was on my mind.

Her eyebrows furrowed and she shook her head, her eyes darting to the door quickly before she looked back at me. “I am his mother, so trust me when I tell you this. He likes you. He may not tell you he does, but my son is, if he hasn’t already, falling for you.”

“How do you know, though? How can you be sure that he likes me?” I asked, the question nagging at the back of my mind. I knew I should have just nodded and left the room when she had first said that, but the more she talked, the more intrigued I got. Did Harry really like me? Was he honestly falling for me, like I was falling for him?

“I can see it in his eyes, love. And just now, when you told him to help Robin clean off the table, he smiled that reserved smile of his and began to help, rather than telling us to fuck off before storming into his room.” Pausing, Anne scooted her seat back and stood up, then walked across the room so she could take Harry’s seat.

“He’s changing, and I know that you may not be able to see it, but he is. He has been willing to eat with us as a family, and participate in our conversations. He’s never been like this. He’s always kept to himself and acted out if any of us asked him to join us for a meal. Never before have we been able to sit down as a family, like we just did, and eat as we joke about nothing.” She said, hesitating a moment before she enclosed both of my hands in her own, her long, light purple fingernails brushing against the back of my hands.

‘I want to tell you something, but you can’t tell Harry I told you,” she said, and all I could do was nod my head. My mind was swimming with all of Anne’s words, and I couldn’t help but feel like I was making a change, even if it wasn’t true.

“Harry has always been a troubled boy. He’s always been the typical teenager that rebels against his parents and does everything they wish he wouldn’t, and I know that he can seem rude and like he doesn’t care, but deep down, he has a big heart that is just tired of being hurt. That boy in there has been hurt more than anyone can realize, and he finally just shut himself off. He used to come home, drunk off his arse with different people almost every night, and the more I pushed him to stop doing it, the more he pulled away and the more people he brought home.” Anne paused and wiped away a tear that had fallen down her cheek as she relived hers and Harry’s past, and I couldn’t help but feel my heart swell at the sight.

“But, he hasn’t brought anyone home for so long, Louis. I was scared that he wasn’t fitting into this new school, or that he just simply gave up doing anything with anyone. So, imagine my relief and surprise when I seen you. I didn’t know how to feel at first, because I figured you were just another one of his typical flings, but when I seen him look at you, I knew that wasn’t the case. I knew that he was undeniably smitten to you, rather you see it or not. You are the boy I’ve been praying will show up and save my Harry,” her voice cracked with the last word she said, and my heart cracked along with it.

My head was swimming with everything I just learned, and my heart was literally aching. I could feel myself getting pulled into the fantasy world that Harry actually wanted me, that he actually wanted to date me, but I couldn’t care. If I continue putting up with Harry acting like he likes me, and I end up getting hurt in the end, then so be it. I will suffer all the heartbreak in the world if it means that this woman finally gets a break from having to constantly worry about her son.

“I’m here to stay,” are the four simple words that I managed to murmur before the door was being opened and Harry came strolling in. Anne quickly pulled back and sniffled loudly, her hands wiping underneath her eyes in hopes she could collect all of her tears.

“What are you two doing?” Harry asked, walking around Anne’s chair so he could stand behind mine. He placed his hands on my shoulders and used his thumbs to massage in between my shoulder blades, relieving the knot that has been growing for so long.

I sighed and leaned back into his touch, my eyes threatening to close. “Nothing,” I mumbled, my eyes snapping open when Harry removed his hands from my shoulders and I could hear him take a step back.

“Then I want to show you something,” he said, and before I could protest, he was pulling me up from my seat and towards the door. I turned around and quickly waved at Anne, then stumbled through the door and managed to follow closely behind Harry, his arm still holding onto my forearm.

“Where are we going?” I asked, not having a chance to look around the house before he was pulling me into the backyard. I looked down at the cement and noticed my vomit that was splattered along it, and next to that was a yellowish liquid with chunks of something in it and what looked like carrots.

I gagged internally and turned my gaze back to where we were walking, groaning when I seen we had yet to reach the half mark of the large grass. I inhaled deeply and just let myself continue to get pulled, giving up on fighting against him and hoping he would tell me where we were going.

We walked across the lawn and towards the treeline, and once we reached the trees, we continued to walk on a narrow dirt path until we reached a wall of bushes. Harry stopped and turned to face me, a grin tugging at his lips. “Ready?” He asked, and I nodded excitedly, being all too thrilled to see what he was so excited to show me.

Grinning widely, Harry let go of my arm and walked forward, pulling the bushes apart so I could walk through it. I ducked my head and walked through the small opening, ignoring all the cuts and scrapes I got from all the different branches. When I broke through on the other side, I stumbled for a few feet then managed to regain my balance, my eyes widening when I seen what was infront of me.

“Oh my god,” I gasped...

  
  
  
  



	25. Chapter 25

A stream of sunlight poured through the thick branches of the trees that towered above me.  I watched as bugs floated in the sunlight, a few of them slowly fluttering to the yellow and pink flowers that littered the ground, which were barely visible above the mid-caf grass. I cautiously walked forward, my mouth falling open as I gaped at the small body of water that rested so calmly just beyond the meadow. 

The pond set so still, not a single ripple in the clear water. A few lily pads rested on the water, and my eyes searched the surrounding area for frogs but I didn’t see one, or hear one. I took another step forward until my feet came in contact with the small area of pebbles that set in front of the pond. They dug into my feet and made little crunching noises with every small move I made.

I looked back down at the water, my eyes dancing over the reflections of the trees that you could see so clearly in the water. As I remained staring in that single spot, somehow the layers of water began to clear and become transparent, allowing me to see all the different types of things that lived in the pond.

My attention was soon captured when I seen something move, and when I finally pinned my gaze on that something, I was held completely captive when that something turned into more somethings. I watched as the fishes swam in the water, their black bodies moving with ease through the pondweed that stuck out all over in the water. A sudden   'pop' sound startles both me and the fish, and I watch as the fish scatter in different directions of the concentric circles that begin to form on the pond.

“No,” I whisper, heartbroken that I wasn’t able to look at the fish for more than a few seconds before something startled them. Another ‘pop’ was heard only a few feet away from me, and I quickly spin around to find Harry standing a few feet away from me, his pant legs rolled up and his shoes off to the side as he throws one rock at a time out of the pile he is holding in his arms.

“Stop!” I hissed, trying to keep my voice quiet so I didn’t startle them any further. I walked over to Harry and pulled his arm, watching in triumph as all the rocks clattered to the ground, a few of them landing on both mine and Harry’s feet. “I was watching those,” I informed him when he looked down at me through slitted eyes.

“So? You can watch still watch them as they swim away,” He rolled his eyes and bent down to pick up more rocks, but I couldn’t have that. Without thinking about what I was about to do, I held both hands out in front of me and pushed Harry forward, having to use all my strength to even get him to budge.

When my fingers were no longer touching any part of Harry, I closed my eyes tightly and waited to hear him fall to the ground, but the next thing I knew the front of me was being soaked with water as their was a loud splashing noise. I squealed loudly and jumped back, quickly wiping the water away from my eyes before I opened them and looked in the water.

To my utter terror, Harry’s head was sticking out of the water, the rest of him being under the water, and he looked absolutely pissed. “I-’I’m sorry!” I quickly apologized, my face contorting into one of horror when Harry began to swim towards the edge.

Without thinking, once again, I spun around as fast as I could and began to run in the direction we came in. I didn’t pay attention to the rocks that were slicing through the bottom of my feet, or the branches that dug into my skin as I dove through the bushes Harry had pulled apart before. All I could really focus on was the sound of someone else's feet hitting the ground as they chased after me.

“LOUIS!” Harry shouted loudly, my heart spazzing in my chest before it lurched itself into my throat. I felt a shock of something run through my body before everything became numb to me and my skin began to buzz lighty. I ignored that, my only real focus was the opening in the treelines that was only feet away from me, meaning I was close to Harry’s house.

“I WILL CATCH YOU!” I felt tears prick my eyes when I hear how close he sounded.

I pushed myself to go faster, ignoring my screaming lungs and sore legs. I needed to get away from him. I needed to get to somewhere safe as soon as I possibly could, and the only place that I knew was around here was in Harry’s house, because at least then there was witnesses if he murdered me. “I’m sorry!” I tried to shout behind my shoulder, but my dry throat wasn’t allowing any words to come up.   

I swallowed thickly and focused on the only path I had to escape. I ran past the treeline and felt my body relax when I seen Harry’s large backyard, but the fear returned even stronger now when I could literally feel Harry’s presence behind me. “NO! I’m sorry!” I managed to scream before my voice gave out.

I was able to see the backdoor of his house opening before an arm was being wrapped around my waist and I was being lifted in the air before I was turned around and slammed to the ground. The grass cushioned my fall, but if it hadn’t been for the hand cupping the back of my head, I would have bashed it into the ground.

I wiggled beneath Harry’s body and scream, figuring that this was it. This is how I was going to die. Beneath a soaking wet teenager that had both my arms now pinned above my head as he straddled my hips, making the bottom half of my body wet. I kept my eyes closed, not wanting to look at Harry while he hovered above me, his angered face only inches above mine. I could hear his loud breathes above my slowly quieting screams, but I couldn’t smell his usual mint breath. All I could smell was the overwhelming scent of fish, which is from the water.

“You pushed me into the water,” Harry growled, his lips vibrating my jawline as he slowly trailed his lips down to the curve of my neck. “That wasn’t very nice,” he added, his teeth nipping at my skin. All the fear evaporated from my body and I could feel myself giving into him, my traitorous body leaning into his touch.

He placed a gentle kiss on the crook of my neck, then drug his lips up my soft skin and placed another kiss on my pulse point. A soft moan escaped past my lips, and I could feel Harry’s hands tightening their grip on my wrists at the noise. He pushed himself down harder on my hips, my cock coming in line with his ass. “I-I’m sorry,” I whimpered, knowing if I didn’t at least try to apologize this would be drug out longer and I would possibly lose my mind.

“Mmm, see. I don’t think you mean that,” A flick of his tongue over my pulse point and I felt myself grow hard, my erection wedging between his ass cheeks. We both let out an incoherent noise, and my tiny hands fisted into balls. Harry pushed his ass back on my dick, then he let go of me and stood up.

I panted heavily and opened my eyes, expecting to see Harry hovering above me but he was nowhere near me. I blinked a few times and inhaled deeply, then slowly exhaled it. What the hell was that? He was going to give me a bloody hard on and just leave me alone without saying a single word?

To keep myself from focusing on the pleasure that was coursing through my burning body, I bit the inside of my lip and set up, the movement causing my boner to rub uncomfortably against the skinny jeans. I situated myself the best that I could and looked behind my shoulder when I hear someone's feet crunching across the grass.

“Oh no,” I moaned, quickly standing to my feet. Harry stood behind me, a big white bucket in his hand that was full to the brim with water that sparkled in the sunlight. He was now only in his black boxers, his wet clothes being discarded on the other side of the porch.

“You have one minute to strip from your clothes and get rid of anything you don’t want ruined before I throw this on you,” Harry said, the muscles in his bicep flexing when he hefted the bucket up a little.

I gulped loudly and looked up at him, my eyes threatening to peek just a little lower. But I knew if that happened, I wouldn’t be able to rip my gaze away from him and I would be standing there like a fool. When my eyes locked with his, and I seen the humor dancing in his eyes, I knew he wasn’t kidding.

Deciding against running away again, I quickly stripped from my skinny jeans and t-shirt, my dick no longer standing up and proud. I threw them off to the side, then tugged my socks off and turned to face Harry. I wrapped my arms around my waist and stared directly at him, my thin lips tugging into a smile.

“I don’t think you have the bal…” I was cut off when it felt like needles began to pierce my skin and water was filling my lungs. I coughed loudly and hunched over, trying to get rid of the water that was burning my lungs and denying me the chance to breath.

When I managed to catch my breath, I wasn’t even worried about the fact that my skin felt like hundreds of needles repeatedly stabbed me. All I was really focused on was the green hose I seen a few feet away from us, the hose just being visible between Harry’s legs. “Asshole,” I stuttered, my chin shivering as I took a step towards him.

Harry dropped the bucket down by his feet and grinned at me, showing off his pearly white teeth. I glared at him, though it was more of a pout, and the moment I seen his foot move even a fraction of an inch forward, I side stepped him quickly and lurched behind him, wrapping my small hand around the hose.

I felt relief wash through my body when I seen the steady stream of cool water coming out of the hose. Without thinking much, I whirled around and placed my thumb over the tip of the hose, watching as the stream of water turned into two. Almost instantly Harry was being soaked once again, the cool water pelting against his chest and face.

I giggled loudly at the profanities he yelled at me. This was fun. So fun that I wasn’t really even worried about the fact that I was almost naked outside, where anybody could see me. A squeal escaped past my lips when Harry took a step forward, but lost his balance on the slick grass and slipped. It seemed like everything was happening in slow motion as Harry’s legs began to fly upwards while he was flying backwards, his arms frantically grasping at the water in hopes it would help him.

The moment he landed on his ass, I dropped the hose and took off towards the door. I knew I wouldn’t make it far, but it was at least an attempt. At the exact moment that thought ran through my head, water began to pelt against my back. “PUSSY!” Harry yelled, and I stopped dead in my tracks and turned around to face Harry.

“Oh, now you’ve done it,” with that said, one of my feet slowly moved in front of me before I began to run towards Harry, my tiny fists flailing around me because I thought I would look tough.

**Harry’s POV:**

 laid on my back on a patch of dry grass, my eyes closed as I soaked in the warm sun. I could feel Louis’ small foot poking against my side, his cold toes feeling like icicles. My arms were folded underneath my head and my legs were crossed over one another, my own toes brushing against the empty bottle of soap.

“Is your mom really mad?” I heard a quiet voice ask from beside me. I peeked my eye open and looked over at him, seeing he was sitting up, his head tilted down as he plucked grass from the lawn and made a small pile between his outstretched legs.

“No,” I said, a smile tugging at my lips. I found it adorable that he was honestly scared about how my mom reacted when she came outside and seen me and Louis spraying each other, one with soap and the other with water.

I was the one spraying him with soap, because he had managed to get the hose back from me after I called him a pussy. He was, oddly enough, a strong little shit who was extremely mean when he wanted to be. I can’t exactly remember how he got the hose, but I think I dropped it and let him have it after I seen nothing but a blur of wet chestnut hair before I felt something biting the side of my thigh, which just so happened to be Louis.

“But, she like, yelled at you,” he mumbled quietly. I held back the laughter that bubbled up my throat because honestly? That’s all she ever does when she communicates with me.

I stayed quiet for a second though and just listened to the quiet crunching noises as Louis pulled the grass from their roots, a few of them snapping in half before he even managed to pull up to roots. “She isn’t mad, I promise,”

“She is too. We not only got her backyard soapy,” Louis paused and I watched as he looked around the backyard and cringed, “But we also wasted an entire bottle of soap!” His eyes widened at his own sentence, like what he had said was all new information to him.

I rolled my eyes and huffed as I pushed myself up a little, putting my arms behind me so I could lean back on them. “I’ll buy her a new bottle,”

“But..”

“No but’s. I will buy her a new bottle.” I eyed him, my face neutral. He huffed after only a few seconds and nodded slowly. A little bit of defiance shimmered in his eyes, but I knew that he knew what I said is what was going to go.

“Now come here, you’re cold,” I laid back down and opened up my arms, inviting him to lay beside me. His eyes widened and he watched me in disbelief for a few minutes before he slowly began to crawl towards me. “Come here, I won’t bit,” I growled playfully, my hand gripping his forearm so I could tug him forward.

Half of his body fell on mine, but he quickly scooted down so the front of his body was pressing against the side of mine and his head was resting on the crook of my shoulder. “There,” I said quietly, smiling happily at how perfectly his body fit next to mine. I lifted up his arm that I still had ahold of and draped it across my torso, showing him what he was supposed to do.

His breath was warm against my skin, and I felt my entire body lit on fire when I felt his body relax and scoot further into mine as he searched for heat. “Thanks,” he mumbled when he got comfortable. I shrugged my shoulders, his head moving a little, but didn’t say anything.

I ignored how his wet hair itched my bare skin, and how his cold fingers were digging into my side. I held completely still because if me being slightly uncomfortable means I am able to feel his body pressed against mine, then so be it. I would do whatever it takes to be able to lay beside him like this, both of us relaxed as our hearts fall into sink.

We laid still for a while, my eyes searching the bright sky that had white clouds covering it, only a few blue patches being visible. I sighed quietly and turned my head to look down at Louis, my arm tightening around his body when I seen he was half asleep. “Harry?” he mumbled quietly, his lips barely moving.

“Yeah?” I asked, my thumb slowly starting to draw circles into his back.

“Are you my boyfriend?”

My heart skipped a beat and my breathing faltered, that four worded question not only shocking me, but making my body light and fuzzy. I quickly composed myself, not wanting him to think that us dating had never crossed my mind, because it had. I have thought about dating him more than once, but every single time I imagine it, our relationship always ends badly.

Thought I already was,” I lied easily, the words flowing out of my mouth without even a slight stutter of hesitation. I stared straight into his eyes, my head beginning the spin the longer I drank in his features. It felt like I had just chugged an entire body of alcohol, and I don’t know if it’s from the way he is staring at me, or the worry of me not being good enough to fix this broken boy.

His eyes suddenly lit up and he squealed. I smiled at him and watched in amusement as he quickly scrambled to his knees, then threw his short leg over my body and pulled himself up so he was straddling me. I didn’t know what he was going to do, so imagine my shock when he began to place kisses across my face and underneath my jaw, his lips slowly trailing down to my neck where he placed one single kiss on my adam's apple before he pecked my nose and moved back so he was staring at me with those damn eyes that sparkled like a child's did on Christmas morning.

“You’re my boyfriend!” He shrieked, his hands balling into small fists on my chest. My stomach began to flop and my heart began to spaz when I realized that something as simple as me dating him would make him this happy. I didn’t understand what was so special about me, why he would choose me. I was, after all, just me. But I didn’t ask him, because I feared if I did, he would realize he was too good for a piece of shit like me, and he would leave me without a second thought.

“Wait,” I looked up at him, and everything in the world stopped when I seen how hurt and confused he was. His eyes were no longer sparkling, a smile was no longer taking up half of his face, and the crinkles by his eyes, that I have grown to love so much, were no longer there. And since those weren’t there, neither was the birds that were once chirping in the distance, or the small squirrel that was once running along the highest branch on one of the trees, or the yellow and black butterfly that had flew past Louis’ head just a few seconds ago. Nothing was here anymore. It was like the moment Louis stopped being happy, the world did too.

“What?” I asked him, worry settling in my chest when he tried to stand up from my lap. He began to shake his head no, as he tried to stand to his feet, and my panic grew more. In one swift move, I was sitting up and my arms were wrapped around his back, holding him in place and allowing him only an inch of space between our chests.

“What’s wrong?” I growled, my arms constricting around his squirming body. His eyes were darting to everything but me, like he didn’t want to look at me. Freeing one arm from around his back, I grasped his chin and forced his head to the right, so he was facing me and his only choice was to look at me. His eyes locked with mine and he whimpered quietly before he closed his eyes tightly, confirming my thought that he didn’t want to look at me, which hurt a lot more than it should.

“Would you talk…” I was cut off when he buried his head in my chest, his nose pressing into the crook of my armpit.

“I-I don’t want to get hurt,” he whispered, sounding as broken as he had looked a few seconds prior.

“I won’t hurt you, I promise.”

“That’s what everyone says.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not everyone. I am here to stay, and I promise you that as long as you are my boyfriend, I will never hurt you,” The promise, while it was a good one, was one I could never keep. I always hurt to people I cared about, rather it was intentional or not. It was like a curse I had, and it never seemed to fail.

Louis wiped his nose against my bare chest and set back, which I allowed him to do. He tilted his head to the side and just stared at me with his round eyes. “Promise?” he asked, and like he wanted my damn heart to explode in my chest, he lifted up his little hand and stuck out his pinky.

I didn’t have to think twice before I was hooking my much longer pinky with his. “I promise,” I whispered, keeping my eyes on him as I bent down and kissed the back of his hand gently. Just as he was about to pull his pinky back, I tightened mine around his and kissed our locked fingers. “That kiss is to seal the deal,” I said, grinning when he rolled his now glossy eyes.

I laughed and let go of his finger, then carefully cupped his cheek. “Now, Louis Tomlinson, I demand a kiss,” I kept my eyes opened but puckered my lips. A blush rose to his cheeks but the moment he closed his eyes and leaned forward, I closed my eyes too and held my breath in anticipation.

Never seeming to fail, lights exploded behind my eyelids and my lips began to burn when he very lightly placed his lips on mine. I moved my hand around so it was cupping to back of his head, and pushed his face forward a little so our kiss was deepened. I moved my lips for a second, but froze when I felt him be the one to run his tongue across my bottom lip.

I didn’t hesitate before I opened my mouth and granted him access, humming at the faint flavor of strawberries that lingered on his tongue. His tongue moved timidly against mine for a second, and when I began to move mine as well, he moaned against my lips and scooted the bottom half of his body forward, making it so his little erection was pressing against the bottom of my stomach.

I internally growled at the feeling, and I imagined how it would feel to have his cock in my mouth as I gave him a blow job. I smirked when I realized I  _ actually  _ could do that and he probably wouldn’t stop me, if I got him wanting it enough. I pushed his tongue back into his mouth with my own, then clasped my lips around his bottom lip and tugged.

He let out a guttural groan and I could all but imagine his eyes rolling into the back of his skull. I smiled a little and, while my teeth were tugging on his bottom lip, I trailed my hand down his back and slipped my fingers past the elastic band of his underwear. “Y-Your mom,” I hear him moan, but instead of swatting my hand like any person would when there was a chance of them getting caught so easily, he pressed his ass back into my hand and moaned.

Rolling my eyes, I began to knead his ass, my own dick growing hard at how soft it was, and how perfectly it fit into my hand. I was so lost in how good this felt that I didn’t realize it was Louis who was on top, and how wrong that was. So, with one swift but careful movement, I flipped Louis over and positioned myself between his spread legs.

I scooted up onto my knees and connected my lips to his neck, sucking and licking over a small patch of skin before I moved to the next. He moaned beneath me, his body turning into a writhing mess and I had yet to touch his penis, though I could feel it pressing against my leg. I was waiting for him to make a move, but then I remembered I was in control and I could do whatever I wanted to.

I grasped one of his ankles and lifted it up so it was wrapped around my waist, and he got to hint and lifted the other one. I moved my hand down to his ass and lifted him up a little, a moan lodging itself in my throat when our penises rubbed against each other. I repeated the action once again, and because there was only a thin layer of clothing that was between up, I could feel each and every vein that was sticking out of his dick.

Not caring if anyone could hear or see us, I repeated that action and over again, savoring each small noise he made. I tried to keep quiet, but when a few moans slipped past my lips that were lightly resting against his neck, I bit down on his neck softly and began to suck harshly, my tongue running over the skin that would no doubt be a dark purple color by the time I got done.

Pleasure exploded in my stomach and began to grow hotter the more I grinded against him. Soon, my entire body was shaking above his and I felt as I grew closer and closer to what would be the most mind-fucking orgasm. I wanted to stop, to be able to wrap my lips around him, but my limbs were locked in place, denying me what I so badly wanted.

“Harry.. Fuck… mmmm” Louis tried to speak, but a sudden thrust forward had his head tipping back and his lips parting. I sucked harder, trying to keep myself from speaking the dirty words that began to clutter in my mind, because I had no idea if he would like it, but the next thing I knew hands were fisting in my hair and tugging at it. I had expected sharp pains to shoot throughout my scalp and down my body, but to my utter surprise, something exploded behind my eyelids and a tingly feeling shot throughout my body and ceased in the head of my leaking penis.

“Oh fuck,” I moaned loudly, my glistening plump, red lips falling open in an ‘o’ shape. “You’re mine,” I suddenly growled, my hand pushing Louis’ ass up more so I got more friction. “All mine. Nobody else can fuck you on their lawn. I am the only one that is ever allowed to touch you, you’re my kitten.” The cute nickname just slipped out of my mouth, and I don’t think I noticed it until Louis gasped loudly and his body began to shake.

“‘M close,” he groaned, burying his face in the crook of my neck. His legs tightened around my waist and he harshly rubbed his penis against mine, then bit down on my neck and almost inaudible scream as his entire body erupted in full body shakes and his penis began to shoot stream after stream of hot, white liquid up his torso, the tip of his dick somehow managing to escape past the elastic band of his boxers.

That was all it took for me before I felt myself giving in as well, my penis throbbing painfully before I just gave in completely and let my own mind go blank. My vision turned white and my entire body felt like it was on fire, but my mind was fuzzy and I felt like I was floating on cloud nine. I couldn’t feel anything, or hear anything, other than my heartbeat that was pounding in my chest, and the pleasure that was coursing through my veins…..

(Time skip)

**_Louis’ POV:_ **

I hopped, yes hopped, down my steps and practically skipped to Harry’s car. When I seen that heartwarming smile he always gave me in the mornings when he opened my door, my stomach erupted in butterflies and a blush rose to my cheeks. I bit my bottom lip and slipped into my seat, then closed the door behind me and set my backpack on the floor.

“Hi,” I giggled quietly, tugging my hoodie up a little to try and cover the three large hickies that covered the side of my neck. When I had first seen them, I was a little upset but then the nickname Harry called me began to play in my head, and I remembered the way it felt to have his lips on my neck, and the anger quickly vanished and I haven’t felt it again.

“Hello,” Harry said smoothly, his hand instantly reaching for mine. I let him take it, and we both laced our fingers together then let out conjoined hands rest on the top of my thigh.

I peeked at him from the corner of my eye and seen he was staring at me, but I didn’t acknowledge him. “Ready?” I asked, squeezing his hand softly before I finally looked at him.

“And where’s your hickeys?”

“I covered them up.”

“Why?”

I shrugged and tugged my hoodie up a little further, now a little self conscious. “Because I always wear my hoodie,” I whispered, ripping my gaze away from him. I glanced out the window, then was about to unlace our fingers when Harry lifted them up and placed a kiss on the back of my hand, then began to drive the car.

“So, how’d you sleep last night?” Harry asked, the smirk evident in his voice.

“Good,” I said, pursing my lips and nodding. I had expected him to ask me that question, considering I had spent the night at his house the entire weekend, but I didn’t want to tell him the truth. I didn’t want to tell him I stayed up half the night with his shirt hugged to my face as I inhaled the light scent of his cologne that still lingered on it. And that I had trouble falling asleep because it felt weird not sleeping in his arms, though on Friday night it had felt weird sleeping in his arms.\

“I slept like shit,” he admitted, knocking me back a step. I turned to look at him, my eyes wide. 

“You what?” I asked, but the longer I stared at him, I realized he wasn’t lying. His eyes were slightly droopy, dark -and very prominent bags, were under his eyes and he just looked extremely tired.

“I slept like shit,” he repeated, his words a little slower because he was an asshole and was making it seem like I was too slow to catch what he was saying.

I leaned forward and swatted his chest with my free hand, then set back in my seat and huffed quietly. “I knew what you meant, I was just surprised.” 

“Why?”

“Because you just said you didn’t sleep well because I wasn’t there.”

“No I didn’t.”

I thought back to what Harry said and realized that he never once said me not being there was why he slept like shit. “Ohh,” I groaned, face-palming myself. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t assume things.” Embarrassment began to uncoil in my chest and spread down to my stomach. Why had I done that? Could I be anymore self conceited?

“Shut up, I’m kidding,” he ran his thumb across the back of my hand, then returned to driving. I didn’t say anything, because I was too embarrassed to, but Harry was probably used to it. I hated talking, and I was hoping he caught onto that.

A few short seconds later we were pulling into the parking lot to the school, and the moment the car was shut off, Harry jumped out of his car and walked around to my side to open the door for me. I grinned up at him and took his hand, then grabbed my bag and climbed out of the car. Harry kept ahold of my hand, and used his other hand to close my door, lock the car, then grab his bag off of the top of the car.

“Let’s go,” he said, already walking forward and dragging me behind him.

I quickened up my pace, almost matching his, and stayed looking at the ground, even when we entered the school. I trusted Harry enough to lead me to my class, which he knew was Health. I squoze his hand tightly when someone brushed past my shoulder, and that was all it took before Harry pulled me against his side and let go of my hand just to wrap his arm around my shoulder. 

I nuzzled into his warmth, feeling completely content in his protective hold. I could feel people's gaze on me, but I kept my head resting against against Harry’s side and my eyes on the floor. I imagined I looked ridiculously small standing next him, half of my body practically being hidden by him, but I could care less. 

Out of curiosity, I glanced up and couldn’t stop from giggling when I seen how shocked everyone looked, and how a few girls looked absolutely pissed off. “They aren’t happy you’re dating the school’s outcast,” I whispered just loud enough for him to hear. Harry glared down at me, but the look melted away and he began to laugh.

“They’re just jealous cause I get..” Harry paused, smirked, tugged me forward and yelled “This ass,” as his hand collided with my right bum cheek. I lurched forward a little, but Harry’s hand around my arm saved me from falling. I blushed darkly and looked around at the sea of faces, seeing they were all gawking at us.

“Mind your own business, fuck faces,” Harry said and pulled me back so I was standing beside him once again, but was no longer buried in his side.

My bum stung a little, but I had to admit I liked the feeling of being… spanked. It was exhilarating, especially since it was in front of a ton of people. But I wouldn’t tell him this, because I needed him to think I was mad, but it was mostly because I was embarrassed enough with just myself knowing I liked the feeling of being spanked.

“Harry,” I hissed, trying to hide my face in his chest but he wasn’t allowing me to.

“What? Don’t act like you didn’t like it,” he smirked once again, then let go of me completely and gave me a little nudge forward. I was about to protest until I seen the familiar door that belonged to my first period.

“This isn’t over,” I whispered harshly to him. I glared at him, then turned around and walked into the classroom, ignoring all the curious looks I got from people. I set down in my seat in the back of the classroom and crossed my legs over one another, just now realizing my semi hard.. Willy.

The bell rang shortly after and class begun. I tried paying attention to what was going on throughout the period, but all my damned mind would let me focus on was my weekend I had spent with Harry. There was a lot of firsts that had went on during the short period I was at his house, but I honestly wouldn’t change it. It was one of the best weekends of my life.

The next four periods I went to seemed to fly by, and that was probably because I finished the worksheet we got at the beginning of class in five minutes, so I was left with my own thoughts the rest of the class. I mostly daydreamed, and god knows that when your mind is relaxed like that and you start dreaming of impossible scenarios, time slips by.

I gathered up my things and walked out of my fifth period class, taking the usual route I took everyday to get to Jen’s room.  I was surprised when I turned down the hallway that lead to her classroom and seen that it was empty, and there wasn’t any sign of student’s having been here at all today. 

I bit my lip nervously and walked towards her classroom, breathing a sigh of relief when I seen her door was opened and the light was on. I scurried into her room and smiled when I spotted her at her desk, but she was facing away from the computer and was hunched up as she packed things into a large red bag.

“Hello,” I said, setting my book bag down on the table closest to the door.

“Wouldn’t get comfy, love. I have to go to a meeting, then clean out this student’s locker.” She sighed, her hand resting on her forehead before she groaned and stood up, hefting the large back up onto her shoulder.

“I could clean the locker out for you? So you don’t have to worry about that too?” I offered, making it seem like I was helping her when she was really helping me. I couldn’t survive a day out in the hallways with other students during lunch.

“Are you sure? I..”

“I’m positive. I’ll grab the keychain from behind the door and lock the door after you leave,” I said, knowing she had an extra key for her room on her personal keychain. She smiled gratefully at me, handed me a sticky note with the locker number on it, and told me to set the stuff that’s in the locker in the locker on her desk and to make sure the door is locked. 

I watched her leave, then grabbed the keys from behind the door and my stuff before I closed the door behind me. I slung the backpack over my shoulder and walked through the quiet hallways, my eyes roaming over the locker numbers. When I finally stepped in front of the locker I was supposed to clean out, I set my backpack on the floor and glanced around me to make sure I was alone.

The hallway was clear and eerily quiet, but I just shrugged it off and stuck the key in the keyhole on the locker and twisted it. I took a step back and swung the door open, my eyebrows furrowing when I seen there was nothing in the locker but a jacket and a notebook. I scratched my head and shook my head, then grabbed the notebook and jacket and closed the locker. 

I slung the jacket over my arm, held the notebook against my chest, and picked up my backpack and threw it over my shoulder. My hoodie slipped down a little and made my hickies visible, but there was nobody in the hallways with me so I wasn’t too worried. 

I began to hum quietly to myself and turned around to walk back the way I came, but the door at the end of the hallway was locked meaning I had to walk back down the hallway and turn left. There was no doors in that hallway, but there may be some students because that wasn’t one of the hallways that were closed off during lunch.

I bit my lip and began to walk down that way, still not bothering to fix my hoodie. My footsteps were the only noise in the hallway the entire time I walked down the hallway, but just as I was about to turn left, I heard someone's shoes screeching across the tile as they came to an abrupt halt.

I didn’t think too much of it, figuring it was a student coming to get their lunch, but I soon regretted not just waiting by the door for the bell to ring so the doors would open. Standing only a few feet away from me was Seth. He was standing in front of his locker, half of his body only being visible to me as he rummaged through his locker.

I gulped loudly and went to take a step backwards, but my shoe someone managed to make a little screeching noise and his head snapped in my direction. He smiled a dark, sinister smile at me and slammed his locker shut. 

“Well, nice to see you without your little protection dog,” he said, taking a step towards me.

My flight or fight mode kicked in when he took another step towards me, but no matter how badly I wanted to run, I couldn’t. I was frozen on the spot. 

“What? No hello?” he asked, his smile twisting into a grin that had my stomach  churning uncomfortably. “Straight to the point, then?” he asked, his grin falling before he lurched at me, my back slamming against the lockers. 

“Leave me alone, please,” I whimpered, trying to wiggle free from his hold so I could move away from the metal part of the locker that was digging into my back.

“Can’t do that. It’s been far too long,” his grin returned, but this time his eyes twinkled with something dark that I couldn’t even decipher, but the look was almost enough for me to scream out for Harry. 

“Now it’s time to have fun,” he growled before his fist was connecting with my stomach and knocking all the breath out of my lungs, making me gasp for breath.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	26. Chapter 26

Harry’s heavy boots echoed loudly in the quiet hallways as he stalked towards the locker room. His breathing was ragged and his eyes were dark with anger. He could feel his anger grow stronger and stronger as images of Louis’ bloody, bruised body popped into mind, followed by a shaky voice describing what had happened.

Louis said that he had been walking back to Jen’s room after cleaning out a locker when Seth had stopped him and shoved him against the locker. He said Seth didn’t say anything before he punched him in the stomach, and when Louis doubled over to catch his breath, Seth had taken that as his opportunity to shove Louis down to the ground, making his head bounce off the tile floor.

_ H-He kicked me in the stomach over and o-over a-a-again. _

Louis’ soft, but rugged voice played on repeat in Harry’s head, making his legs move faster and his burning anger grow into a wildfire. His skin began to burn and his fists began to shake as his anger that he has kept shoved down for so long, began to resurface. He admitted that he missed this buzz, that he missed how his skin felt like it was on fire, but one thing he didn’t like about right now, was the large ball that was weighing heavily in his stomach. It was painful with each step he took and each breath he took in. He felt like he was suffocating, but it wasn’t from his pent up rage. It was from seeing Louis like that, and hearing what had happened, and not having been able to stop Seth from doing it.

He felt disgusted with himself, but the moment he seen the red locker room doors, all that vanished and he was solely focused on bashing Seth’s face into the ground. He could faintly hear Louis quiet voice pleading him to stay in the classroom, to not do this, but Harry just clenched his jaw tightly and came to an abrupt halt in front of the doors.

He debated on whether or not he should open it and just storm in, but then he realized that he wouldn’t get too far before the coach was pulling him off of him. He decided on staying out here, just long enough for the bell to ring, but that didn’t seem to work. He couldn’t just stand still like that, so he began to pace, then pacing turned into walking all the hallways, then he was just about to turn around and walk outside when the bell rang.

A smile instantly tugged at his lips, and he watched as the hallways began to fill up. His back straightening and his fists clenching, he began to push past all the students that began to fill the hallways and he stopped in front of the now open locker room, but he didn’t want Seth to see him and run away. Glancing around him, he took a step to the right and leaned against the locker, his arms crossing over his chest as he grinded his teeth together.

Student’s walked past him, a few of them double glancing in his direction, but none of them said anything, and it was probably for the best. Harry was so pissed he would beat the shit out of any person he could right now, and he would still have enough rage to beat the fuck out of Seth. Seconds, or even minutes passed before Harry seen the familiar head of blonde hair walk out of the locker room, a red bag slung over his shoulder.

He watched as the jock turned in his direction and began to walk, his eyes on the floor before someone called his name and he looked up. His grin instantly vanished and his face fell, his eyes widening when he seen the lanky boy leaning against the locker, his legs crossed over one another and his arms folded on his chest.

He had expected this, he knew this was coming, but when he seen that fire burning deep in Harry’s eyes, he knew he was a goner. “Look, man, I’m sorr-.” Seth began to say, but a loud growl followed by a fist connecting with his jaw instantly shut him up. His head snapped to the right and before he could turn to look at Harry, he was being grabbed by the neck of his shirt and slammed against the locker, the sound of his skull connecting with metal echoing in his ears.

Harry twisted his fingers into Seth’s shirt, his breathes deep as he tried to control himself when all he really wanted to do was snap this kids neck. “I don’t want to hear your shit excuses,” Harry growled in Seth’s face, something deep inside of his stomach pulling when he saw fear flash through Seth’s wide orbs.

A circle began to form around the two, a few of Seth’s football buddies hovering behind them but they knew not to jump into something unless they really needed to, and they both figured their friend could take on Styles. They had no idea why he was even labeled the school bad ass in the first place, because all he’s really done is jump Seth with one of his friends, and talk to the schools nerd.

The student’s held completely still, all of them anticipating the moment Harry or Seth lifted his fist, and they didn’t have to wait long before Harry’s hard fist connected with Seth’s face again, the jock spitting out blood that began filling his mouth from his teeth piercing his tongue.

_ He, he called me a fag and pun-punched me in the face. _

“Don’t you ever fucking touch Louis again,” Harry said, his fist connecting with Seth’s face again, and again, and again. The jock’s jaw was throbbing painfully, but no matter how much he struggled, he couldn’t get free from his place up against the lockers.

Finally, Harry slammed Seth back into the lockers again, then threw him down to the ground and stood above him, watching as the jock scooted back a few inches before he collapsed on the floor, his blood stained lip swelling and turning a purple color. “Come on, Mr. Bad ass. You can beat the shit out of people smaller than you, but you can’t beat me? Come on! Fight me!” Harry yelled, his fist, which was splattered with blood, clenching at his side.

“Fight me!” Harry yelled one more time, and when he realized that Seth was either unconscious, or just too big of a pussy, he bent down on one knee and grabbed him by the shirt once again. He pulled him up, discovering he was fully conscious, and leaned down so they were only inches away from each other.

“Looks like you’re the pussy,” A dark grin twisting his lips, Harry brought his fist back and punched Seth in the face one last time, this time in the right eye.

He stood up and wiped off of his hand, then turned around, only to see a group of people surrounding them. They were chanting something, but Harry couldn’t hear it past the ringing in his ears. “That’s for all of you, leave Louis alone,” with those final words, Harry pushed past the group of kids and began to walk down the hallway, towards Jen’s room.

He knew he was stupid for doing this, for doing as much damage as he did to the rich pricks face, but then Louis’ face popped into mind and he knew it was all worth it. He walked down the hallway, leaving the circle of students and jocks -that were towering over their bleeding friend- behind, Harry sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, just now discovering it was bleeding.

He lifted his hand up to it and touched it gently, wincing at the pain.  _ Hmm,  _ He thought,  _ the jock must have actually landed a punch.  _ Wiping the blood off on his sleeve, he pushed the door open to the end of the hallway and glared at every student that even glanced in his direction. He cursed at a few of them, finding their beady eyes uncomfortable.

He had just turned down the hallway to Jen’s room when he felt a hand suddenly being placed on his shoulder. His first instinct was to punch the person, and that’s exactly what he was going to do until he came face to face with the school's security guard. The guards fingers dug into Harry’s shoulder as he tightened his grip, his jaw clenching as he stared Harry up and down.

“Mr. Styles?” The security guard asked, but based on the dark gleam in his eye, he already knew the answer to his question.

“Oh fuck off and show me to the office,” Harry said, rolling his eyes as he spun around. He coughed loudly, trying to hide his sharp intake of breath when the older man's hand tightened even more. Both of their footsteps echoed in the now quieting hallways as they walked down towards the principal's office. The number of students slowly began to die down until there was only a few scattered throughout each hallway they walked down.

Finally, what seemed like forever, -at least to Harry, who had been grinding his teeth the entire time to keep from punching the guard- they were walking through the doors to the office and the guard immediately dropped his hand and smiled at the principal who was staring directly at them. “Hello, sir,” he said, and Harry scoffed at how ridiculous this guy was being. Was he seriously going to go from ‘Mr. Bad ass who likes to break student’s shoulders,’ to ‘Mr. Kiss ass who has to impress the boss.’

“Dumbass,” Harry mumbled under his breath, just loud enough that he knew the man standing next to him heard it. Sure enough, there was a glare cast in his direction before he was being drug towards the principal’s office.

“Oh, that’s such a strong hold you have. Do you work out?” Harry teased the buff guard, his dimples popping out when the man, who’s name Harry just discovered was James, whispered a very harsh “shut up,” to him before he pushed Harry into an uncomfortable office chair.

Harry pouted at James from his half laying/sitting position in his chair. The guard rolled his eyes and leaned against the door as Harry set up and turned so he was facing Mr. Daniels desk. “You summoned me,” the teen said, a cocky grin stretching his lips when Mr. Daniel’s eyed him over the rim of his glasses.

“What happened to your lip?” Mr. Daniel’s asked, but both of them knew he was trying to point it out in a not-so-subtle way.

Harry grinned, Mr. Daniels raised an eyebrow, and the guard shifted from one foot to another as the silence seemed to stretch on. “I think you know what happened,”

“I do, but would you care to enlighten me?”

A bead of sweat began to form on Mr. Daniel’s forehead when he seen a few men appear in his door way, but he gave a slight shake of his head and returned to Harry, waiting patiently for the boy to answer him.

“I’d rather not waste my breath,” Harry said, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back in his chair. Mr. Daniel’s sighed and laced his fingers together, squeezing them tightly to try and keep his calm, even though he could feel his already shot nerves start to grow non existent.

“Harry,” Mr. Daniel’s began, leaning forward in his chair. He glanced behind Harry one last time, then looked at the younger boy again, his eye flickering from his large, bruised lip with the large gash in it, to his green eyes that were slightly glossed over. “There are two police officers waiting out in that room for you,” he pointed behind them, but shook his head when Harry turned to look. “And if you don’t tell me something, I will be forced to let them take you off of my school’s property,” he finished, giving Harry what he was hoping was a stern look.

Harry’s entire body froze when he heard there was two police officers in the other room, and despite Mr. Daniel shaking his head, he turned in his seat and looked past James, seeing two men in dark navy blue uniforms. His heart stopped in his chest for a split second, but then he seen another body appear behind them and all his anger returned.

“That fucker beat the shit out of Louis’.” Harry growled as he tried to stand from his seat, but a gentle hand on his shoulder pushed him back and he looked up, only to discover James hovering above him.

“Wouldn’t do that, kid. Not while there are three men out there that are thirsty for your blood,” James said, and the gleam he had in his eye was no longer there, it was instead replaced by a strange sparkle of what seemed to be gentleness.

“I couldn’t give two shits what happened to me,” Harry growled, pinning his eyes on Seth that was talking to the officers. The blonde jock had blood trailing down his face and his right eye was swollen shut, but what had Harry’s gut twisting in satisfaction was how terrified Seth looked when he glanced in Harry’s direction for a split second.

“Harry, we have called your parents, so why don’t you tell us what happened before they get here?” Mr. Daniels suggested, his worry filled eyes flickering between Harry and the officers.

“I’d rather wait,” Harry said, crossing his arms defiantly over his chest. He leaned back in his chair again and began bouncing his leg, his eyes trained on that in hopes it would take his mind off of the prick in the other room.

Ten minutes passed in uncomfortable silence before a man in a blue suit stormed into the office, his face red as he looked over his sons face. His suitcase flew across the room and his face turned an even darker shade red when he pinned his eyes on the back of Harry’s head and began to yell even louder, the words jumbled so nobody could really catch what he was saying.

Harry knew the man was yelling at him, but he stayed focused on his bouncing knee. He couldn’t handle this. He wouldn’t be able to stay calm when a man was yelling at him. And to make it all worse, his fucking mind wouldn’t stop playing the images of Louis’ bruised body over and over again. He just wanted it all to stop, before he did snap and wasn’t able to stop.

Somehow, the officers managed to get Seth’s dad calmed down and they all came into the room. Mr. Daniel’s stood and introduced himself, but Harry stayed seated, simply glaring when one of the officers tried to shake his hand.

“What the hell happened?” Mr. hothead blurted out as soon as he took a seat next to Mr. Daniels, his gleaming eyes pinned on Harry.

“I treated your son like a pussy and pounded the shit out of him,” Harry said, finally speaking more than a word after staying silent for at least fifteen minutes.

Everyone in the room gasped, except for James who had to cover his hand with his mouth to stifle his laughter. Harry winked at him, then looked back at Seth’s dad and grinned widely. “What? You asked,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“I didn’t ask you to be a smart-ass,” he growled, his fingers pulling on his neck tie that was far too tight for his liking. He stayed staring at Harry in disgust, not knowing why this meeting was even important when he knew for a fact that the little shit head who possibly ruined his son's football career was going to get locked up. If not in jail, then in a juvenile center. That, he was sure of.

“I asked you to tell me what the hell happened. I want to hear your side of the story so then I have both,”

“You already have Seth’s? Dear god, then there is no reason for me to tell you my side, is there? Cause Daddy’s little boy will be sure he gets his way, isn’t that right, Pumpkin?” Harry asked, grinning at Seth who was now as pale as Mr. Daniel’s office walls.

“If you wanted money so bad, why didn’t you just fucking get a job you low life piece of…”

“STOP IT, NOW” Mr. Daniel’s voice boomed out, his glasses sliding down his nose as his fists slammed down on his desk, making papers fly off and slowly flutter to the ground.

Everyone in the room went silent, the only thing to be heard was Seth’s wheezing breaths. “There is to be no name calling, and no lies. Understood?” He asked, eyeing both Harry and Mark. When he finally felt like they understood, he nodded his head and set back in his seat, then gestured his hands, signaling for Harry to continue.

“I didn’t hit your son because I wanted money,” Harry said, scoffing at such an accusation. He looked at Seth’s dad, then at Seth, seeing the jock was cowering back. “I hit him, because he hit my boy…” Harry paused and quickly swallowed the rest of that word, not wanting Seth to know what Louis was to him in fear he would harm him further just to get back at him. “He hurt my friend. No, he beat the shit out of my friend,”

Angry eyes were suddenly peeled away from Harry and directed at Seth, his father’s nostrils flaring as he locked eyes with his sons one good eye. “Is that true?”

“N-No. He cornered me in the hallway and demanded my money, but I left my wallet in my locker so he hit me,” Seth lied, shaking his head furiously as he scooted back further in his seat. He looked completely terrified right now, like he wanted to seat to swallow him alive.

“Don’t fucking lie. I don’t need your money,” Harry growled, all eyes on him once again. Harry leaned back in his seat and shrugged when they all continued to stare at him with curiosity.

“No, I believe my son. You tried to steal his money because you’re one of those poor bastards the school lets come here out of pity,” Seth’s father said, his voice deepening but not at all threatening. Harry looked at Mr. Daniels, the older man's eyes widening when he seen the taller boy's eyes darken, his jaw clench and his nostrils flare. “I don’t see why you allow them to attend here, Dewey. They are nothing but a disgrace to this wonderful school you run here.” Mark glared at Harry, his eyes only glancing at Mr. Daniels for a second.

Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath in before he went to stand up, but the door was suddenly being pushed open and his eyes snapped open, his body relaxing a smidge when he seen his mother’s familiar face, then his step father’s.

“Mr. and Mrs. Twist, welcome.” Mr. Daniels, said, his chest deflating a little as his nerves began to lessen. He knew Harry wouldn’t do anything irrational while his mother was here.

Anne smiled warmly at the principle, but her face fell when she looked down at Harry. She squinted her eyes in a way that let Harry know that no matter what happened here, they would still be talking about it at home. Harry nodded, then watched as his mother took a seat next to him, her purple scrubs standing out against the brown chair. Next to sit down was Robin, who was wearing a black suit with the ridiculous green tie my mum insisted on buying him.

“Now, what’s going on?” Anne asked, keeping her eyes focused on Mr. Daniels. She didn’t dare look at her son, because despite the anger she felt towards him right now, she couldn’t help but let her momma bear rise at the sight of his split lip.

Three people began to talk at once, but with one wave of Mr. Daniel’s hand, everyone went silent once again. “We got a report earlier today from Mrs. Black, who is our school advisor. She said she needed to school’s nurse because a student was brought into her room in poor condition. About half an hour later, we had student’s running in here, all of them yelling that Harry was fighting Seth down by the locker rooms. Now, we have no idea if the two are related, but some students have said that Harry was only getting payback.” Dewey said, pushing up his glasses when he finished. “We have tried to get both boys to tell us what happened, but Harry refuses and Seth’s version seems to be a little flawed.”

Anne looked at the young boy she presumed was Seth and cringed when she seen his face and all the damage her son has caused. Biting the inside of her cheek, she cleared her throat and looked back at Harry. “Speak, now,” were the only words she said, but those seemed to do the trick.

Harry explained everything that happened, from the moment Louis was shoved against the lockers, to the very last detail of Harry calling Seth a pussy before he walked away. Nobody spoke while he had talked, but Mark had been tempted to butt in a few times.

“Now, Seth,” Anne said, her voice cracking slightly as her mind conjured up an image of Louis small little body bruised and bloodied. She didn’t care what Seth’s story was, or what had really happened, all she really cared about was knowing in that sweet little boy was going to be alright.

Still trying to swallow all of this new information, Anne continued to shift in her seat, the movements not going unnoticed by Mark. He had been staring at both her and her husband the entire time they have been in there, still trying to process the fact that what his son said may not be the truth because he recognized Robin immediately, him being business partners with him.

“Harry stopped me in the locker rooms after it cleared out and demanded money, but I had left my wallet in my backpack in my locker and he began to hit me when I didn’t give him any,” Seth lied once again, clearly not realizing the change in his story.

“Wait, but I thought I stopped you outside of the locker rooms?” Harry asked, the question making Seth’s aching body freeze. He stared at all the adults, then tears began to slip past his eye.

“I didn’t mean to hurt him as bad as I did,” Seth said, finally deciding to tell the truth when he realized he wasn’t going to lie his way out of this situation.

Mark yelled something that nobody caught before he stood up from his seat and stormed out of the room. “Forget pressing charges,” he yelled over his shoulder as he picked up his suitcase and stalked out of the school, leaving everybody gaping at him.

“Well then,” Mr. Daniels said, clearing his throat. He turned his direction back to the remaining people in the room and spent the next ten minutes deciding on good punishments for each student. They decided Harry would be suspended from school for a week, and that Seth would have the same punishment until Mr. Daniels had a chance to speak with his father.

**Louis’ POV:**

I walked down the hallway, my arm wrapped tightly around my waist. Another arm was wrapped around my shoulders, helping support my weight as they led me towards the office. My chest hurt with each breath I took, and my stomach ached painfully, but I somehow managed to keep the tears in my eyes.

“Thank you,” I wheezed out, smiling over at Jen, but the movement hurt. The underside of my jaw was completely bruised, and my cheek and eye were bruised as well, but I managed to not get a swollen eye.

She didn’t say anything to me, but just gave my shoulder a soft squeeze before she walked me into the office, then into Mr. Daniel’s office. My eyes fell on Harry’s mom and stepdad, both of them sitting in front of Mr. Daniels empty desk. I walked a little further into the room and a smile instantly stretched my sore lips when I seen Harry sitting in the seat next to his mom, a scowl on his face as he stared at the wall.

“Harry,” I rasped out, pushing Jen off of me before I carefully made my way over to Harry, who quickly stood up from his seat and wrapped his strong arms around my fragile body carefully.  I melted into the embrace and rested my cheek against his chest, my own arms wrapping around his body.

“Are you okay?” he whispered in my ear, his head bowed down far enough.

I nodded a little and nuzzled into his body a little more, then pulled back. “Oh, Harry,” I breathed out when I seen his swollen lip, my finger gently brushing over the gash. “What did you do?” my eyes searched his, but I seen nothing except for relief and happiness.

“Nothing that you need to be worried about,” he puckered his lips, wincing a little but it didn’t go unnoticed by me, and pecked my fingers. “I promise,” his bottom lip caught on my finger, and I could feel his lip tremble in pain, so I quickly pulled my hand back and let it fall at my side.

“Louis,” a voice said, popping mine and Harry’s bubble. I gasped quietly and took a step back, Harry’s arms falling from around my body. I missed his touch and the warmth he provided, but the moment I remembered we weren’t alone, all those feelings were squashed flat.

“Yeah?” I asked, focusing on Anne, who had been the one to say my name. Her eyes were watering a little, but she didn’t say anything before she pulled me into a tight hug. My body scream in pain, but I ignored it and wrapped my arms around her body, returning the hug.

“You are coming home with us,” she breathed in my ear before she pulled back, her hand lifting up to my cheek and wiping away one of the stray tears that fell from my eye. I wasn’t crying from pain, but because of the fact that for the first time in years, I felt a mother hug a child like she was her own. The way she hugged me was how my mother used to hug me, and I didn’t realize I missed it until just now.

I smiled and nodded, not trusting my voice right now due to the lump that began to form in my throat“Come on, dear,” she said, wrapping her arm around my waist but it was instantly swatted away and replaced with Harry’s.

“I got him,” Harry said, eyeing his mother like she honestly posed a threat to him. I rolled my eyes and mouth ‘sorry’ to her, but she smiled and just shrugged, watching as Harry carefully pulled me into his side.

“I won’t break,” I mumbled up to him when he barely even placed his hand over my hip. I placed my hand over his and made his fingers curl around it, then I patted the back of his hand and let my own fall. “I’m just a little bruised up,” I said, leaning my head on his shoulder. I didn’t want to tell him that my head was throbbing and my chest felt like it was caving in, because I didn’t want him to worry. So, I opted to keep it to myself and suffer through the pain silently as I walked with him out of the school and towards his car.

“I wanted to kill him,” Harry told me once we were seated in his car and I was buckled up. He stared out the windshield at his mom that was getting into Robin’s car, or so I think, and grabbed the steering wheel tightly.

“I know,” I whispered, closing my eyes to keep myself from crying when I remembered the look on Harry’s face when I had finished telling him what had happened. He had looked livid, and I was worried that Harry would kill Seth, or beat him until he was almost dead. I had wanted to stop him when he left Jen’s room, but both teachers had held me back, neither of them caring that I was sobbing and screaming Harry’s name. “I’m glad you didn’t,” I added, cringing as I took in a breath.

“You are the only thing that stopped me from doing it,”

“Me? How? I wasn’t even there,”

“The thought of never seeing you again had crossed my mind, and that was all it took before I stopped,” he admitted, and if I thought breathing was impossible before, then I was surely mistaken. My heart stuttered in my chest and all the pain seemed to evaporate, leaving me with this overwhelming feeling of… love?

“Then never leave me,” I said, my eyes opening when he placed his hand on my thigh. I stared at it for a second, tracing over each bloody crack in his knuckles from the fight, to the little black cross that he had tattooed on his hand. I didn’t want to look at him, because even though we were admitting things, what I had just admitted had a lot more meaning behind it then I think even I knew.

“Never,” that word lingered in the air as he lifted his hand up to my cheek and turned it before he connected his lips with mine. It was a simple kiss, but it made my head spinning and my heart racing.

It was me who broke the kiss first, partly because I couldn’t breath, but mostly because of the ridiculous words that wanted to be released from my mind. “What am I doing to do with you, Harry Styles?”

Time Skip:

I walked down Harry’s steps slowly, careful to not slip because of my socks. Harry’s shirt swayed with each step and danced around my bare thighs, threatening to expose my red boxers. Like a nightgown, the shirt reached mid-thigh and loosely fit my body, practically drowning me but he insisted on me wearing something that wouldn’t squish my chest.

I breathed quietly so I didn’t wake anyone up and walked into the kitchen to make me a cuppa. I couldn't sleep, so I was hoping the warm cup of tea would calm my nerves. Since we left the school earlier, my brain hasn’t let me have one quiet moment. If I wasn’t thinking about what had happened earlier, I was reminding myself that I was getting too involved with Harry, that each day I continued to spend with him would just be one more day I spent in pain when he did break my heart.

Sighing deeply, I grabbed a cup off of the counter. I set it down upside right and reached under the sink for the kettle, where Harry had put it earlier after making hot chocolate for him. I filled it up with water and walked over to the stove, my hips swaying and creating a small breeze that had my nightgown lifting up once again. I turned to stove on and then leaned against the counter, having to prop myself up on my arms so I didn’t apply any pressure on my chest and stomach.

I cupped my face in my hands gently and closed my eyes, enjoying the silence of the house. Even when people were asleep at my house, and the inside of my house was quiet except for the occasional creak and groan, the outside world was loud. You could hear the neighbors next door fighting until the sun rose, or the woman across the fence from us that left her bedroom window opened and snored loudly. Or even the police sirens that were heard in the not too far distance.

A sudden high pitched whistling noise had me jumping and my eyes snapping open. I licked my lips and turned off the stove, then poured some water in my cup and grabbed one of the tea bags off of the counter that were in a small jar. I put it in my cup, watching as it slowly sank before it finally clanked against the bottom. The water turned a murky color before it finally began to go brown.

I grabbed a spoon out of the drawer and quickly fished it out, then threw it away in the trash. Cleaning up my small mess, I grabbed my cup and tea and turned to walk back through the house and up the stairs, but a body leaning against the door frame had me stopping dead in my tracks.

“That’s Harry’s favorite tea,” she said, smiling softly at me before she walked over to the counter and took a seat on one of the barstools.

I just stared at her, not knowing what to say considering I have never even talked to her. I had never really met her before, either, except for the few times I ate with her. So, instead of embarrassing myself, I nodded my head and took a sip of my still burning hot tea. It burned my mouth and throat as it slid down, but I just bit my tongue to keep myself from reacting to the pain.

“Need any tylenol or anything?” she asked, looking around the room like she was searching for something. I shook my head and looked over at the entrance, then back at her. “I won’t bite, you can talk to me,” the small giggle that followed after that had some of my body tension melting away.

“Sorry, i’m bad at talking,” I said, watching as my tea swirled in the cup. She stood up from her seat and walked around the counter, then stopped when she was in front of me.

“Then why don’t I just do this, then let you go to bed,” she said, and before I could ask do what, she was wrapping her arms around me in a quick, but not at all awkward hug. “Thank you for helping my brother,” she whispered sincerely, her eyes locked with mine.

I stared up at her for a second, but didn’t get a chance to ask her how I was helping him before she was turning around and walking back through the kitchen entrance. I watched the entrance for a second, completely forgetting the hot cup I was holding in my hand. She wasn’t the first person that has thanked me for helping Harry, but she was the first one who meant it from the bottom of her heart.

And, as I stare at the same spot she disappeared through, I find myself smiling. I, for once, may actually be welcomed in a house full of people who actually care about their family. Who may even care about a strange boy who is apparently helping their anger filled son, and brother.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	27. Chapter 27

Time jump backwards:

_ Blood dripped off my chin and landed on my bare chest. It slowly slid down across my chest and tummy, a sickeningly beautiful contrast to my pale skin. Once it reached my tummy, I couldn’t stop my eye from straying to the dark bruises that littered my stomach and sides. They made me sick staring at them, made me remember how weak I truly was. _

_ “Stop that,” Harry barked from across the room. I ripped my gaze away from my stomach and looked over at him. He was on his knees in front of the bath, one of his hands cupped under the clear stream of water that began to fill the tub. _

_ “Stop what?” I asked him, even though I knew the answer. The muscles in my tummy twisted into knots when Harry glared over at me, giving me his warning look. But, instead of doing what he had intended it to do, it made me strangely aroused. _

_ “Quit acting dumb, little einstein, and get over here,” he snapped, and I knew that he didn’t mean to make me cry, but I couldn’t stop the tears from collecting in my eyes. His eyes widened when he seen the tears start to trail down my cheeks, and he quickly stood to my feet. “Louis, baby, shh. I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he whispered, his eyes going into gooey orbs. _

_ Small little tears soon turned into ugly fat ones and they just wouldn’t stop. I couldn’t make the bloody things stop falling, and I hated it. I was already weak enough to Harry without him seeing me like this, with red puffy eyes and tears mixed in with my blood. “You didn’t,” I said between my gasps of breaths. _

_ I had never wanted to be like this in front of Harry, to be a sobbing mess that was literally falling apart in front of his eyes. “Then what’s wrong?” Two strong arms were wrapping around my waist and I was being lifted from the toilet before I was set down in his lap. _

_ “I hate myself,” I managed to say, wanting nothing more than to pull away from Harry and hide, but my body betrayed me and turned into his. I hooked my arm under his shoulder and hugged him tightly against me, my face burying in the crook of his neck. I didn’t care about being cautious of my face. All I cared about was this awful feeling that was in the pit of my stomach. _

_ “Louis,” it sounded like he wanted to say more, like he had planned on saying more, but much like me, it sounded like he had a ball lodged in the middle of his throat. That one simple word had so much pain laced in it that I had no idea who was hurting more. Me, or him. “Don’t say that,” once again, he sounded like he was in pain, like each word was forced past his constricting throat. _

_ That only made me cry harder. My tears stained his skin and soaked his shirt, but he didn’t seem to care. His arms just stayed wrapped tightly around my body, and he stayed rocking me back and forth. Comforting words were whispered in my ears, words about how amazing I was and how beautiful I was, but I didn’t believe any of them. They were all lies. Nobody told me the truth but Seth, because he didn’t care if he hurt me or not. _

_ Even after my tears stopped falling, I stayed clinging to Harry like my life depended on it. The white towel he once had slung over his shoulder was now on the floor, and there was a large wet spot on my pants from where Harry had grabbed me. We must have stayed there for a while, because by the time Harry situated me so I was cradled in his arms, his shirt was completely dry. _

_ He set me down on the counter and ignored my protests as he peeled off my pants and socks. I realized that he wasn’t going to stop no matter what I said, so I slumped back against the mirror and watched through half open eyes as he threw my bunched up pants and underwear in the corner, followed by my socks. _

_ “Come on, princess,” he whispered, the word making my insides twists and erupt in small butterflies. He slipped his arm under my legs and lifted me up, letting my head rest against his shoulder as he carried me across the bathroom before he gently set me down into the warm water. “Relax,” _

_ He reached off to the side of me and got a small fluffy towel that he dipped into the water. I leaned back in the tub and let my lead like limbs sink into the water that eased my nerves and helped my pain. Gently, like a person who was washing a baby, Harry began to rub circles into my chest, turning to once white towel into a light pink one. _

_ “You’ll be okay,” he whispered, and it wasn’t until then that I knew I would be. I would be okay, we would be okay. I knew that I would be completely fine if I had Harry, because without him, I wouldn’t have made it through this school year. _

Present:

Sunlight poured down on me, and my skin eagerly soaked in the rare vitamin D. “Louis, dear, would you like a breakfast muffin before Harry takes you home?” Anne called from the doorway. I smiled to myself because wow, this woman was far too kind.

“Aww, thanks love, but i’ll be fine,” I said, turning around to face her and having to cup my hand over my eyes to even get a good look at her. I felt queasy even thinking about eating one more bite of food, considering Anne had already made me eat an entire bowl of some weird breakfast casserole thing.

She pouted, which I would have known even if I wouldn’t have been able to see her, before she shoved the brown paper bag under her arm, which I was assuming held a few muffins in it. “Fine, but call us if you need anything!” she reminded me for only the thirtieth time today. I nodded and promised her I would, even though I probably would never call her even if I was on my death bed. Nothing against her, I just hate asking for help.

Anne huffed and went to go back inside, but Harry walked out just as she was getting ready to walk in. “Take this and make sure that boy eats it. He’s too small,” I heard Anne hiss to Harry before she shoved the bag into his arms. I laughed loudly and watched with a smile as Harry rolled his eyes, took the bag, and jogged down the stairs.

We both climbed into the car, and after promising Anne i’d come to visit her soon, we were pulling out of the driveway. “That woman,” Harry said under his breath. He shook his head and glanced in the rearview mirror to make sure nobody was behind him before he finished backing up.

“Is lovely,” I said, peeking into the bag Harry had handed me. Sure enough, there were three large blueberry muffins in the bag, and underneath them was a small clear bowl with some of the casserole from this morning in it. “Want a muffin?” I asked Harry, but scoffed as soon as I did. I didn’t know why I bothered asking him if he wanted food, because he always did. The little shit was always hungry.

“Feed me,” he said, rather than saying a yes or no. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a muffin out of the bag, then peeled back the paper lining. They smelled divine, and, because I promised Anne I would eat one, I took a small bite of it. The blueberries were tart, but the amount of sugar she had put in them seemed to level it out and make it absolutely delicious.

“Mmmm,” I moaned, licking my bottom lip to collect some of the crumbs. As I was chewing, I leaned over and lifted to muffin up to Harry’s lips, watching as he devoured half the muffin in one bite. “Jesus,” I said, looking down at the poor thing in horror.  “He was gone too soon,” I held my free hand against my chest and made my chin quiver.

“Oh shut up and feed me more,” I laughed, but did as he said and with two more bites, the muffin was gone and crumbs were littering his lap.

“It’s a very  _ crumby  _ day,” I said, nudging Harry with my elbow. He rolled his eyes and I burst out laughing because jesus, was I funny or was I funny?

“You are oh so hilarious,” he said, obviously unamused which made me laughed harder. My stomach hurt and I felt like I couldn’t breath, but I couldn’t stop laughing. This was far too amusing to me, and I had no idea why. It was just a stupid pun.

I managed to calm down, and once I did, I made a scene of wiping away the fake tears from underneath my eyes and flicking them off before I rolled the bag up and set it between my legs on the floor.

“Do you really have to go home?” Harry asked me when he turned down the street my house was on. I sighed, and wanted to tell him no, but I didn't. I had to go home. I haven’t been at home for over two weeks, well, except to get clothes and a few other things.

“I really have to,” I mumbled, tugging at the end of mine, well Harry’s, shirt. It was a light blue one that was small enough that it didn’t completely drown me, but it was still big on me.

“It’s not like they care if you’re there or not,” he mumbled under his breath, but it was just loud enough for me to hear. I don’t know why, but I felt hurt that he would say that. I mean, I know that my mom and sister doesn’t care if i’m there or not, but it just hurt to have someone else point it out to me.

“Yeah, well, just because they don’t miss me doesn’t mean I don’t miss them,” I snapped, fighting back my tears. I didn’t miss my mom so much, but I did Lottie. We may only get along when I am high out of my mind, but she was still my sister and one of the few people I had left in my life. “But thanks for reminding me my family doesn’t care about me.” My tears falling was inevitable now.

“That’s not what I meant,” Harry sighed as he pulled up infront of my house. I ignored him and climbed out of the car, my eyes glancing at the brown paper bag but I didn’t grab it.

I closed the door and looked through the window at Harry. “Goodbye, Harry,” I said when the window began to retreat into the door. Waving at him one last time, I turned around and ran up my old, worn out stairs, tears blurring my vision.

I could hear Harry yelling after me, but just as I was closing the door, I seen his car speed off. I leaned back against the door and took in a deep breath, trying to steady my heavy breathing and rapidly beating heart. I hated how something so simple had hurt me so much, and it wasn’t like he was even trying to hurt me.

Shaking my head, I pushed up off the door and walked a little further into the house. The entire house was swallowed in darkness and the old washing and drying machine was heard clanking obnoxiously loud in the bathroom. There was no other noise in my house except that, and I began to grow worried until I heard the clank of a bottle falling to the ground, followed by my mother cursing.

_ Great, she’s already drunk. _

I took in a deep breath and walked through my house that seemed even smaller now since I had spent so long in Harry’s mansion sized house. The floorboards creaked under my feet, and I had to admit I missed the sound. It might annoy other people, but after having spent so long in this house, these small noises comforted me.

“Mom?” I asked quietly, my knuckles raking against her door. When I got no response, I grabbed the small, metal doorknob that had many chips and dents in it, and turned it quietly. The door squeaked as I pushed it open, but it wasn’t loud enough to bother my mom. I peeked my head into the room and seen a small figure on the bed, curled up in my mom’s old blanket. Her room smelled like dust and alcohol, the mixture having my nose itch and my stomach churn.

“Mom?” I repeated, looking around her room before I crept over to her bed and set down on the edge of it. I placed my hand on the person’s hip and shook them gently, trying to wake them up. I was a little confused because I had just heard her bottle fall against the floor, which was now nudging against the top of my shoe, but all my confusion vanished when the person rolled over and smiled at me, all their teeth gone but their three bottom ones and one on top.

“Hi beautiful,” he murmured, his voice thick and raspy, but not in the attractive way. I jumped off the bed and took a step back, fear striking through my body.

“Who are you?” I asked, my voice shaking. The guy’s brown eyes snapped open and looked at me in confusion for a second before his features were over ridden with anger.

“Stupid bitch told me she didn’t have a boyfriend,” he growled, his legs kicking against the blankets as he struggled to get out of them. I began to walk backward, my hand behind me in search of a wall or something.

He finally got free and stood up from the bed, the only thing covering his hairy body was a thin piece of boxers, but they didn’t even do a good job. “Who the fuck are you?” he asked, his lips pulling back and revealing his yellowish teeth. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach, one that was telling me to turn around and run away, but I was frozen in place.

“I-I’m her son,” I squeaked out, only managing to get those words out before he took three large steps towards me. He reeked of b.o and alcohol with a strong hint of urine. I felt my breakfast making it’s way up my throat, but I swallowed thickly and forced it down.

“She only has that stoner bitch of a daughter,” he said, taking another step forward, and I took a step back. Shaking my head frantically, I took another step, desperate to get out of here. I was just now feeling better after my body being pummeled by Seth. I didn’t need one of my mom’s crack head boyfriends to beat me up again.

“No, I… LEAVE ME ALONE!” I scream loudly when he grabbed my arm with his callous covered fingers. Track marks littered his arms and the back of his hands, and his face was covered in pick marks, signaling he was going through withdrawls.

“Don’t fuckin….” The door slammed open and before I could register what was happening, my arm was being yanked forward because the guy was being tackled to the ground.

Blood began to drip from my arm from the guy’s fingernails digging into it, but I was more focused on the boy with black hair that had the other man’s arms pinned on either side of him. “What did I tell you about touching not touching either of her kids again?” the black haired boy asked, the lower half of his body pressing down on my moms boyfriends lower half, trying to hold him still.

But when did Zayn meet this guy? And when did he lay a hand on Lottie? A new topic on my mind, I ran out of my mom’s room and up to Lottie’s, leaving Zayn and the creeper wrestling on my mom’s floor, but i’m pretty sure the younger boy would win it without even trying.

I barged into her room, finding her sitting on her bed, a pipe held to her lips. She looked over at me, her bloodshot eyes peeking just above the top of her elephant shaped pipe. “Lou!” she shouted, dropping everything on her bed before she ran to me and wrapped me in a hug.

I sighed and hugged her back, her familiar body fitting with mine perfectly, but not as perfectly as Harry's did. I pulled back first so I could examine her body, and I was just about to give up until I seen the large hand shaped bruise on her arm, almost hidden underneath the sleeve of her shirt. “Jenson’s an asshole,” she said and shrugged when I looked up at her and silently asked her for an answer.

I didn’t know who Jenson was, but I was guessing he is my mom’s new boyfriend. “Where’s Zayn?” she asked as she sat back down on her bed and resumed what she had been doing.

“Has Jenson pinned to mom’s floor,” I said, walking over to her bed and sitting next to her. She offered me the pipe after she took her hit, and no matter how tempting it looked and smelled, I didn’t take it. I promised Harry last week I would stop doing that, unless it was with him, and I planned on keeping that promise.

“So, how’s lover boy?” she asked, waggling her eyebrows which had both me and her laughing.

“Good, good. He’s a little mad at me right now,” I said, sighing when I remembered how we left off. I looked down at the pipe between her legs and it became more and more tempting, but then I reminded myself that if Harry found out, he would take away the fluffy dog stuffy he got me not too long ago.

Rolling her eyes, Lottie lifted to pipe back up to her lips and took another hit before asking, with smoke filled lungs, “When aren’t they?” I laughed and shrugged.

“How are you and Zayn?” I asked her before she could ask anything else about me and Harry. I may love Lottie, and I may be completely comfortable around her, but I didn’t like talking about my relationship. I felt like what me and Harry did, or how we were, was between the two of us. Not the two of us and everybody else.

“Oh god, I think he broke my vagina,”

“How the hell do you break a vagina?”

“You play with it too much,” she winked at me and leaned across me so she could set her lighter and things on her nightstand table. I gagged and acted like I was revolted, but I was actually happy for her. She has been so used to just fucking guys because she felt like nobody would love her, so I was happy she found someone like Zayn.

And, speaking of the devil, he came walking into the room just as Lottie set back down. Her eyes went soft and mushy, and so did his, until he ripped his love filled gaze away from her and looked at me. “Hey, Lou.”

I nodded in acknowledgment, but didn’t say anything. “You okay?” he asked, and I just nodded again. Was it supposed to be this awkward when you were in a room with your sister and her boyfriend?

Scratching the back of his head, Zayn nodded and pursed his lips, a look of guilt forming on his face. “What?” Lottie and I asked in unison, both of us glancing at each other with a smile before we looked back at Zaynie boi.

“Your mom is kinda really pissed and wants us to leave for the day,” he said, his tongue ring slipping between his teeth.

“Well, I can just go to your house,” Lottie said, and great. At least she knew where she was going.

“You can come too, if you’d like,” Zayn said, looking at me and I debated on whether or not I wanted to, but then my phone began to ring in my pocket. I held up a finger and fished it out, then rolled my eyes when I seen Harry’s name lighting up the screen. He calls at all the right times, doesn't he? I sighed and answered the phone, then lifted it up to my ear. I was expecting to get yelled at for acting the way I had in the car, so I readied myself.

“Hey, princess,” Harry said, making me blush lightly. He had started to call me that ever since he helped me bathe that one night, but I was still trying to get used to it.

I turned away from Lottie and Zayn and smiled into the phone. “Hia,” I mumbled, honestly shocked he hadn't yelled or got upset.

_Bipolar little asshole._

“Listen, i’m sorry about the way I acted,” Harry said, and I went to respond, but someone yelled ‘Harry, tell Louis what I told you to,’ I smiled because I instantly recognized Anne’s voice, but then I began to feel a little worried because what did she want Harry to tell  me?

“Mum” which is how he refers to Anne when speaking to me now, “Wants to know if you would like to come over and have dinner here.” I rolled my eyes. This woman worried way too much, especially about me eating, but then I remembered my current situation.

“I would love to!” I said, then added, “even though I literally just left,” Harry laughed into the phone, then told his mum who squealed in delight.

“Tell him we…” Anne began. “I’LL BE OVER IN A FEW MINUTES,” Harry shouted into the phone, trying to be heard above Anne’s, and just before the line went dead, I heard Anne yell, “Damn you Harry,”

I chuckled and shook my head, then put my phone back into my pocket and turned to look at the couple that was now sitting on the bed together. “So?” Lottie asked, her hand running up and down Zayn’s chest. Her head was resting on his shoulder and his arm was around her waist, his chin resting on her head.

“Thanks for the offer, but someone’s coming to pick me up,” I said, standing up from the bed. I looked down at my arm and seen there was still blood oozing out of the wounds, the fresh blood sliding over the dry blood.

“Oh lover boy!” Lottie shouted, her footsteps following after me as I walked into my room and grabbed an old shirt I could use for my cuts. I grabbed an old raggedy white one and held it over my arm as I walked down the stairs, ignoring her ridiculous comments about me and Harry. Both her and Zayn followed me out of the house and down the steps, all three of us standing together in a circle on the lawn.

“Is his cock big?” Lottie suddenly asked, forgetting she was supposed to be singing that one song from ‘Dirty Dancing’. I choked on my saliva and looked at her with wide eyes.

“That is none of your business.”

“He does, doesn’t he!?!”

“No, Lots, you’re forgetting. Poor little Lou here is still a virgin. Probably doesn’t even know what a cock is,” Zayn said, his elbow nudging me. He winked at me, then walked over to Lottie and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

I wanted to tell them that I wasn’t a virgin, but Lottie knew when I lied, so I kept my mouth shut long enough for me to think of something to say. “I know what a weiner is,” I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest, making it so the injured one was on top.

Both of them laughing, Lottie began to pat Zayn’s chest as little snorts escaped past her nose. “Weiner!” She shouted when she got a small little break from laughing, but that word had them laughing more.

“Oh fuck off, both of you,” I growled, turning my back on them. I heard Zayn say something about me being able to say fuck, but not cock.

I rolled my eyes and ignored them, deciding that if they were going to be assholes I wasn’t going to talk to them. “Alright mate, ‘m sorry.” Zayn said, patting my shoulder but I pulled away from him.

“Don’t touch me,” I grumbled, still pouting. I didn’t like it when people made fun of me for being so innocent when it came to things like that. It wasn’t until a few months ago that I was even comfortable thinking the word cock, let alone saying it. And I wasn’t all that innocent. I mean, i’ve practically air humped a guy because I was so fucking horny.

“We’ll leave you and Harry alone,” Zayn said, and when I looked up at him, I could see how hard he was trying to hold back his laughter, but I knew he meant it.

“Fine,” I sighed, “But I do know what a cock is,” I clarified, blushing lightly when the word left my mouth.

Zayn stifled his laughter, and when I glared at him, he just lifted up both of his arms, like he was saying he surrendered, and took a step back. I huffed and glanced down at my arm. The shirt was now a deep red color in patches from my blood. I carefully, or as carefully as I could, pulled the shirt up. Biting down harshly on my tongue, I ignored the tears that pricked my eyes as the shirt pulled at the fresh wounds, and threw the bloody material down to the ground.

I wished Harry was here, because shockingly enough, he was good with things like this. I didn't care to know why, though. I'd rather that stay a mystery. “Lemme see,”Zayn said, and I didn’t have a chance to protest before he was grabbing my arm and flipping it over so he could see each scratch. “He just barely popped through the skin, but your arm will be sore for a while,”

I rolled my eyes because even I knew that. “Thanks,” I said, going to pull my arm back but a black car slowly creeping up behind Zayn had my body erupting in butterflies. “Harry!” I shouted, waving at him as he pulled up to the curb and stepped out of the car.

My eyes widened when I seen what he was wearing. He had on loose basketball shorts that just reached his knees, a black tank-top and a white bandana. “Oh shit,” I breathed out, pushing Lottie away when she looked at me and grinned.

“What happened?” Harry asked me as he came to a stop by my side, his eyes flickering from my arm, to Zayn’s hand that was still around it, and up to Zayn. I knew this was making Harry upset, so I quickly pulled my arm out of Zayn’s hold and lifted it up so Harry could see the four long scratch marks.

“Mom got a new boyfriend,” I said, my skin bursting into flames when Harry lightly grabbed my arm and looked over the wounds.

“We’ll need to clean you up when we get back h…” Harry suddenly paused, “Wait, your mom’s boyfriend did this?” His eyes darkened and his hand was no longer holding my arm, it now being clenched into a fist at his side.

“Harry, no. Zayn already dealt with it,”

“Oh he did, did he now?” Oops, shouldn’t have said that. “Tell me,  _ Zayn,  _ what did you do?”

I could feel the anger radiating off of Harry, but I had to admit it was kinda hot the way his face slowly fell apart and revealed the dark mask he always wore. “I tackled him to the ground and told him to stop,” Zayn said modestly, shrugging like it was no big deal.

I wanted to tell Harry that Zayn did more than just tackled him to the ground, but that was probably the worst possible thing I could do. Nodding, Harry began to run his finger along his bottom lip.

“And… He is still walking?”

“What? Of course. I’m not going to beat the shit out of the guy,”

“I would have,” pausing, Harry looked away from Zayn and stared down at me, “I still might.”

I shook my head and grabbed his arm, desperately clinging onto his arm because I thought he really was going to go into the house. “Please, don’t,” I pleaded, ignoring the way Lottie and Zayn’s eyes burned holes into my body. “I’m fine, I promise,”

His eyes searching over my body to look for any new bruises or anything, he breathed deeply through his nose and nodded slightly. “Fine,”

I mouthed a thank you, then turned and looked at Lottie. “Harry, do I know what a cock is?” I suddenly blurted out, completely changing the topic away from the creep that was staring at us through the small window in the frontroom.

“I don’t know. Do you know what that thing was that you were riding last night?” Harry asked, smirking when he got three different reactions. I swatted his chest, Lottie gasped and Zayn laughed.

“He wishes we had sex last night,” I said to Zayn and Lottie, rather than Harry. “But yes, I know what a cock is. Tell them, Harry. They were making fun of me,”

Putting one arm around me, Harry drug me to his side and kissed my forehead. “He knows what a cock is, not that it’s any of your business.” Leaning down so his mouth was by my ear, “I’m hoping you will ride me tonight,” he breathed into my ear. I squirmed against him and flushed as I imagined what it would feel like to not only have sex for the first time, but to ride Harry on his huge bed.

Pushing the image down, I squirmed once again and inhaled deeply. “Anne is expecting us, I think it’s time to go,” Before anyone could tell me goodbye or say anything else, I was grabbing a hold of Harry’s hand and pulling him towards his car.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked when I walked him around to my side.

“Helping you open my door,” I said, not caring that it made me seem like a helpless little boy who had to have his door opened for him, because I knew I wasn’t. I could open my own door, but I just prefered it if Harry did. It made me feel special.

Harry gave me a weird look, but opened my door for me nonetheless and helped me into my seat. Making sure all my limbs were in the car, he closed my door carefully and walked around to his side. I watched his small butt in his shorts, groaning at the way the material became tight around each cheek with every step forward.

“BYE LOU LOU!” Lottie yelled just before Harry closed his door. I leaned forward and waved at them, then set back in my seat and done up my seatbelt.

“You are rude,” I said to Harry, the click of my seat belt being buckled following shortly after.

“What?” Pause, laugh, “Why am I rude?” Ignores me completely as he drives down the road, which is honestly what I prefer.

“You were teasing me,” I whined, tugging at my pants that had grown just a tad bit too tight.

Pausing at the stoplight, Harry turned to look at me with a half smirk. “Who said I was teasing?”

 


	28. Chapter 28

_ Louis eyed Harry with wide, blue orbs. “I’m just supposed to stick it in my mouth?” he asked, question so innocent yet so dirty. With a simple nod of Harry’s head, Louis sighed before inhaling deeply, trying to muster up as much courage as he could. _

_ He was nervous, that was evident, but he didn’t really have a reason to be. Well, there was the fact that this was the first time he would have a penis is his mouth, but he wasn’t really worried about that. He was more worried about fucking up somehow, but then he reminded himself that there was once a time that Harry had never given a blow job, that he too was once as inexperienced as Louis, and that thought alone had almost all the nerves in Louis body relaxing. _

_ Biting his lip, Louis moved down the bed and laid down on his stomach, propping his elbows up on Harry’s hips so he wasn’t exactly face to face with the enormous bulge in Harry’s trousers. Gulping, Louis leaned to the side and slipped his hand in Harry’s underwear, then pulled them down softly and watched in amazement as Harry’s length sprung out of his underwear and nearly slapped him in the face. _

_ Jumping back, Louis eyed the thing like it was going to eat him at any second and finally flicked his eyes up to meet Harry’s humour filled gaze. “My penis will not hurt you,” Harry said, smirking because he knew he had won. He had bet Louis that he wouldn’t give him a blow job, that he would be too scared. _

_ Huffing, Louis stuck his tongue between his lips and without looking down, he grabbed a hold of Harry’s cock and nearly dropped it when he felt it throb in his hand. Harry moaned loudly at the simple contact and went to throw his head back, but he forced himself to keep his head up, to keep his eyes open so he could watch Louis. _

_ “You just have to..” Harry began, but Louis began to move his hand slowly up his shaft, the movement nearly uncomfortable from his hand being dry. “Spit on your hand and do that,” Harry said through gritted teeth, his cock twitching in Louis hand when the boy spit into his hand and switched hands, wrapping his small, wet hand around Harry’s length, his fingers not being long enough to completely circle around it. _

_ Looking down and focusing on his hand, Louis kept his tongue between his lips and began to move his hand up and down again, his eyes glued on Harry’s penis as he watched it twitch and felt it throb a steady rhythm into his hand. A loud moan from Harry had courage surging through Louis body, and he quickly used that little bit of courage and dipped his head down before wrapping his lips around just the tip of Harry’s cock. _

_ Louis scrunched his nose up at the salty and bitter taste, but he pushed past the taste and moved his head down a little further. It felt weird to feel as his mouth stretched so wide to fit Harry in, but he had to admit he liked how good it felt to have Harry pressing down against his tongue. _

_ Louis continued pushing his head down until the tip of Harry’s penis hit the back of Louis throat, making him gag. His throat constricting around the penis, Louis refrained from pulling back so he could cough, and he instead just kept still, letting himself adjust for a second before he moved his head back up and pushed himself to go back down. _

_ He discovered that giving a blow job was easier than he had thought, and he soon built up a steady pace with his head bobbing.  “Mmm, Louis, more,” Head tilted back, Harry’s hands fists in the sheets and his eyes screw shut as a tongue dips into the slit of his cock before a small hand began to pump the bottom half of Harry’s shaft where Louis wasn’t able to reach with his mouth. _

_ “Fuck,” Harry moaned, his shaking arms giving out under his weight. He collapsed back on the bed, his abdomen clenching tightly as he forced himself not to thrust his hips forward. He felt the pressure in his stomach begin to grow more and more the faster Louis’ mouth and hand went, but what finally had Harry reaching the brink of his orgasm was when he tilted his head up and locked eyes with Louis. _

_ “I wanna taste you,” muffled, but still audible, Harry’s entire body tensed before he was thrusting up into Louis’ mouth and, with a loud, powerful scream, he came, cum shooting down Louis throat and pooling in his mouth. _

_ Louis’ eyes widened when Harry thrust his hips forward, but he kept going, despite the tears that began to well up in his eyes. He took one last deep breath through his nose before he felt something warm and sticky pelting against the back of his throat, the substance pooling in his mouth and sliding down his throat. _

_ Gagging, Louis powered throw his uncomfortableness and continued sucking despite the cum that was beginning to escape past his lips. When Harry’s entire body collapsed back against the mattress and his cock went completely soft, Louis pulled back and looked around the room before he swallowed the mouthful of semen, a shudder running down his spine at the bitter, yet pleasing taste. _

_ He wiped away the stray cum that was dripping down his chin and looked down at Harry’s lax body, a giggle escaping past his lips when he seen how blown Harry’s pupils were. He smiled proudly and crawled up the bed, then curled up at the older teens side, ignoring the way the hair on his thighs scratched Louis’ smooth legs. _

_ “You taste good,” Louis whispered up to Harry, placing a gentle kiss on the corner of his jaw before he laid his head on Harry’s chest and waited for him to return back to reality. _

 

~~~~

Harry’s pov:

I watched Louis closely, even though I knew I shouldn’t. The way his still swollen lips looked wrapping around his fork was doing things to me, things that shouldn’t be happening to me while I was in a room with my family.

“So, how was it at home, Louis?” My mum asked him, her knife scraping against her plate as she cut off a piece of her steak.

Louis turned his gaze away from his food and glanced up at me for a second, then over at my mum. “It was good,” he lied, subtly tugging down the sleeve of his long shirt.

I scooted up in my seat a little and leaned on the table, my elbows resting on either side of my plate. I cupped my head in my hands and just rested their, letting my cheeks be squished between my hands. “And Harry? How was your drive?” Anne asked him, deciding Louis’ answer wasn’t satisfying enough.

“Can we not do this?” I asked, my head bobbing in my cupped hands. I knew my mother asking this question was just to see how I was doing, but I wasn’t in the mood to deal with answering her questions. Not while I had a raging hard on underneath the table.

“Do what?”

“Nevermind. It was great, thanks for asking,” I closed my eyes, but tilted my head so I could smile in her general direction. An elbow jabbing into my ribs had me yelping in surprise at the painful attack. “What was that for?” I growled under my breath, turning so I was facing Louis.

“Stop being rude, or I won’t ever give you another blow job,” the threat was one I didn’t take seriously, because I knew Louis had enjoyed giving me head, but I sighed anyway and nodded.

“I will be nice if she talks to me again,” I said, not wanting to apologize to my mother because I knew she would take that as an invitation to talk to me about anything and everything, and I didn’t feel like talking to her more than I had to.

I rubbed at my side, where Louis had elbowed me, and set back in my seat. My empty plate was in front of me, reminding me I was a huge fat ass compared to all the people around me that still had half a plate of food left. “I’m fucking hungry still,”

“Harry! Language!” My mother scolded me, pinning me with her disapproving gaze. I held my hands up in mock surrender and grinned when her glare just deepened. “And there’s food right in front of you,”

“I don’t want that,” I paused and turned to look at Louis, “I want something sweet,” I ran my tongue along my bottom lip and smirked, watching as he flushed and his jaw stopped working on chewing the hard piece of celery in his mouth.

“There’s plenty of sweet food in the kitchen, Harry,” My mum said, dragging me out of my secret dirty time with Louis. I glared over at her, but stood up from the table and told Louis I would be back.

My socks slid across the floor as I walked into the kitchen. Grinning, I grabbed ahold of the counter and spread my legs out a little, then pulled myself forward. I slid across the floor, managing to stop myself just before I hit into the fridge. I quickly got into the freezer and pulled out the ice cream, along with the milk and whipped cream out of the fridge.

Whistling quietly, I got out the blender and set everything up on the counter, then I reached into one of the top counters and pulled out all the milkshake toppings and things we had. There was reeses pieces, reeses peanut butter cups, m&m’s, kitkats, butterfingers, snickers, gummy bears, sprinkles and the chocolate syrup stuff you pour over ice cream and it hardens.

I scooped some ice cream into the blender, using a lot more than most people would, before I put a handful of reese's peanut butter cups in it, along with snickers, butterfingers and some sprinkles. I pursed my lips to the side because that honestly didn’t look like enough stuff in it, so I shrugged and just put a handful of everything there was in the blender before I put some milk in it and put the lid on.

My hips swaying to some ridiculous song in my head, I turned on the blender and spun around to grab one of the glass milkshake cups out of the cupboard, along with one of those bendy straws my mom bought because she knew me and Gems liked them. “You sit there in your heartache..Waiting for some beautiful boy to save you from your old ways. You play forgiveness, watch it now, here he comes,” I sang, spinning around and nearly dropping the glass when I seen Louis was leaning against the counter.

I jumped a little, having been shocked, but then quickly recovered and set the glass down on the counter. “I didn’t hear you,” I said, though I found it kinda ironic the song I was singing, and the part I was at when I had turned around and seen Louis was standing there.

“I like that song,” he said, his voice soft and his eyes mushy. I just nodded my head, not knowing how to react to him liking a song I have listened to for years now. I turned off the quiet blender and took off the lid, then peered down at the brown ice cream that had a few colorful dots from the gummy bears.

My nose scrunching up at how disgusting it looked, I dipped my finger into the ice cream and lifted it up to my lips. I sucked on my finger, humming in approval and surprise because it honestly wasn’t that bad. I scooted my cup over and poured my milkshake into it, having just enough to fill my glass completely full.

Glancing up to make sure Louis was still there, which he was, I grabbed the whipped cream can and shook it before I began to spray some on top of my milkshake, making a perfect spiral that built up. I then sprinkled some sprinkles over it and grabbed a cherry out of the fridge. I placed the cherry carefully on top of my creation and made a kissing nose.

“Beautiful,” I said, shaking my head. I honestly outdone myself this time. I shoved the straw into my milkshake and sipped on it, the milkshake filling my mouth. It wasn’t too thick, and it wasn’t too watery. It was absolutely perfect.

“What was that song?” Louis asked me, and I peered over at him from above my glass.

“When you were young, by The Killers,” I said, simply shrugging.

“Can you sing that part for me again?” he asked me quietly, and when I looked at his round, blue eyes, I couldn’t say no.

“You sit there in your heartache.. Waiting for some beautiful boy to save you from your old ways. You play forgiveness, watch it now, here he comes,” I sang once again, keeping my eyes locked with his. Louis nodded, then walked over to me and took the cup out of my hands.

“You should have watched it, you pretty much told yourself I was coming,” he said, and just by looking in his eyes, I knew his words had a lot more meaning behind it then what I initially thought. I bit my bottom lip and furrowed my eyebrows as I replayed the lyrics over in my head. Before, I had never really payed much attention to the lyrics, but now, with Louis having pointed it out, I discovered the song had a lot more meaning to it than it did to me when I was younger.  

\---------

I walked down the hallway, keeping my gaze straight ahead so I wasn’t forced to look at all the stupid fucking prom decorations. I didn’t understand why they were advertising it when it was still a month away. It wasn’t like any of the student’s were going to miss it, even if they had only been notified the day before it was supposed to happen.

Rolling my eyes at the obvious flaw in my thought because obviously I  _ wouldn’t  _ be going, regardless if they would have started to advertise it the moment I came to this school. School dances were stupid and a waste of time. Why would I want to spend my time dancing with somebody in the same room with my sweaty peers who would rather be out fucking than dancing.

“Harry,” a voice called out from behind me. I stopped dead in my tracks, not caring that I was in the middle of the hallway. If these fuck faces needed to get by, they could walk around me. When I felt the person hook one of their thin arms with mine, I began to walk again, moving my hand back a little so I could lace my fingers with theirs.

“Hey, I think prom is on the thirteenth of May,” Louis said, nudging me in my side before he giggled and shook his head, his head brushing against my bicep.

I laughed with him, my heart fluttering at the sound. It was still an odd feeling to me, to have my heart flutter at the stupidest and simpliest shit Louis does, but I liked the feeling. “School dances are fucking stupid,” I muttered, glaring at a student who looked at me and Louis and laughed.

“I’ve never been to a school dance, so I wouldn’t know,” Louis whispered quietly, and I would have missed it if I hadn’t actually been listening to him.

I felt pain an odd sense of pain at his admittance, and I hated that I even felt pain at something Louis said to me. God, I hated this whirlwind of fucking emotions. And I hated all these pricks in this town, because they are the reason Louis has never went to a school dance. “Are you going to this one?” I asked, knowing the answer would be no unless I asked him, and I never would.

“Don’t have a date yet,” he said, and once again, pain.

I sighed because my brain already started to think up of ways I could ask him, even though there was no way I was going to ask him, or go to prom. Period. We walked in silence for a few seconds, because I didn’t know what to say and I doubted Louis would say anything. He was probably waiting for me to ask him to go to prom with me.

“Would you go if someone asked you?” I asked, curious to know if he would go if someone had asked him, someone other than myself because like I said, I would never go to prom.

“I guess so, yeah. I mean it would be fun, wouldn’t it?” he asked, his chin resting on my bicep when he turned to look up at me. I looked down at him for a second, then looked back at the hallway and steered us so we turned down the left hallway.

I shrugged, moving his head a little, and pulled my backpack further up on my shoulder. “It could be, I guess,”

Silence once again stretched between us, but there was still noise around us from all the loud ass teenagers. “Well, I need to go to Jen’s room so I got to go,” he said, going to pull away from me but I held onto his hand.

“But it’s lunch. What do you have to do in there?”

“I don’t know, just stuff,” he shrugged and looked down at the ground, then back up at me.

“Whatever. If you get hungry, i’ll be in the lunchroom,” I said, reluctantly letting go of his hand. He nodded at me, smiled, then turned around and walked down the hallway we just came from. I sighed deeply and raked my fingers through my hair, my rings tugging at a few strands.

“What the fuck am I going to do?” I asked myself, pinching the bridge of my nose. My head began to hurt the more I thought about what I was going to do about Louis and prom, and by the time I reached the lunchroom, I still hadn’t came up with any ideas.

_ I was completely and utterly fucked. _

  
  



	29. Chapter 29

**_Third person:_ **

The rest of the week drags on slowly, and by the time it’s Friday, Louis finds himself done with everything already. He is tired, sick, and is just overall done with this feeling of never being enough for anyone. He wasn’t enough for Harry, that’s why the older boy wasn’t taking him to the prom, and the reason he wasn’t at school today. He wasn’t enough for Jen, who was in her classroom working her ass off trying to finish the assignments Louis surprisingly failed to finish. He wasn’t even enough for his own mother or sister. Neither of them wanted to see him at home, and they proved that point when he woke up this morning to both of them fighting about him and how useless he was.

Clasping his teeth around his bottom lip, Louis tugs at it and walks down the stairs to the school. School has been out for an hour, and he has yet to leave. His mind was so fuckind clouded today that he hadn’t even been able to finish his own assignments. So, while he was trying to fix his fuck up, Jen was trying to fix his other fuck up so the principle wasn’t riding both of their asses about their student’s being behind on work.

His shoes crunched on the gravel as he walked rather quickly towards whatever direction he was going. He didn’t want to go home right now, that was for sure, so he was just going to walk for a while until he was finally forced to go home. He didn’t want to deal with the fighting at his house anymore, and he didn’t have anywhere else to go, because he hasn’t seen or spoken to Harry since yesterday after school when he dropped him off at his house, but his legs seemed to know the direction he was supposed to be going as he trudged forward.

The sky was dark, grey clouds filling every blue crack in the sky. There was a small stream of sunlight that would occasionally pierce through the thick layer of clouds, but it wasn’t frequently and it was never for long.

Wrapping his arms around his lower waist, Louis looked down at the ground and watched as one foot appeared in the other. He really needed a new pair of shoes, he decided, when he noticed one hole forming on the tip of his shoe, right where his big toe was. He was surprised his shoes had lasted this long. When he had stole the money from his mom and bought them, he figured they would last a few months at most, but not two years.

“Where the hell am I going?” shaking his head free of thoughts about his damn shoes, he looked around his surroundings. He didn’t notice this neighborhood at all, partially because it was one of those nice neighborhoods, but he just figured he had took a long route home. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his hoodie and moved over to the edge of the sidewalk so he could balance on the curb.

It was hard at first, trying to move one foot in the other without stepping in the wrong spot or losing balance, but he finally got the hang of it. He walked along the sidewalk, taking every curve carefully and stepping over the cracks. He didn’t know how long he was doing this for, but before long, he was in a totally different neighborhood. But this one, he recognized.

“Oh shit,” he said, face palming himself before he peaked between the cracks of his fingers to make sure the house he was staring at, was the house he thought it was. Sure enough, he seen the familiar four garage doors, and the stretchy driveway that lead up to the beautiful door.

It was Harry’s house.

Of fucking course he walked to the one person’s house he really didn’t want to see right now. Growling in frustration, Louis watched the door for one more second before he stepped off the curb and began to walk in the opposite direction then what he had came here in. He had made it a total of three fucking steps before the door to the bloody house was swinging open and a figure was stepping out on the porch.

“Louis, dear, is that you?” Anne asked, wrapping her pink house robe around her body and tying it shut so the cool air didn’t lift it up again.

She peered down her long driveway, having to squint to see the small figure standing still on the road just beyond the sidewalk.`She could have swore it was Louis when she seen the boy staring up at the door, but when she didn’t get a response, she sighed in defeat and walked back into her house.

“Yeah, it’s me,” a solemn voice said. Anne spun around and smiled widely, watching as Louis walked up the driveway and towards her door.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, pulling him into a tight hug once he reached her, “Not that I don’t love seeing you, of course!” Her arms tightened a little bit more, then she pecked Louis’ cheek in a motherly and finally let go of him, but she kept her arms on his shoulders and held him at arm’s length. She looked over him in a subtle way, just to make sure there were no more bruises on anything that covered what visible parts of his body she could see.

“I was walking home from school, and I guess I just decided I needed to come here,” shrugging his shoulders, Louis pulled his backpack further up on his shoulder and finally looked up at Anne. Her eyes were warm and her pale pink lips were pulled into a tight grin.

Stepping back, Anne gestured for Louis to come in, “I am so glad you did! We’ve missed you! Especially me,” she closed the door behind Louis and then began to walk into the kitchen with Louis following after her.

“I would have come sooner, but I didn’t know if Harry wanted me at his house or not,” Louis admitted, taking his seat at one of the bar stools that Anne has started to call ‘his’. His short legs dangled off the ground, and he refrained himself from kicking them. Instead, he hooked his feet on the bar on his stool and set his backpack on the seat next to his, that was usually occupied with the body he had missed hugging.

_ He just simply missed Harry. _

“Why wouldn’t he? You guys are goi…” Cutting herself off, Anne’s eyes widened and she clamped her mouth shut. She had almost just let a secret Harry had entrusted her with, out. Cringing at thinking what Harry would do to her if he found out she told Louis, she quickly busied herself in the kitchen and filled two cups with steaming water. “Dating, aren’t you,” clearing her throat, Anne placed a tea bag in each of the cups, then a spoon.

Louis eyed the older woman for a second, his eyebrows furrowed at her sudden hesitation. Brushing it off when she handed him the cup of tea, he smiled gratefully at her and cupped it in his hands that he didn’t realize were cold until now. “I guess so, yeah,” he said, blushing. He fished the tea bag out of the cup with his spoon, then placed both the bag and spoon on the plate Anne had setting between them.

“Oh come on, darling. I need a little gossip. I haven’t been to the hairdresser’s in over a month, and all the gossip at the hospital is--,” stopping mid sentence, Anne gagged and shivered in mock disgust and grinned at Louis before taking a sip of her tea.

Louis giggled at Anne and mirrored her. He took a small sip of his tea, having to gag it down because it wasn’t yorkshire tea. “There isn’t much to say about anything, really. The only real interesting thing that’s going on right now, is that Harry isn’t taking me to prom,” he said, shrugging once again. He didn't feel like talking about him and Harry, but he didn't want to hurt Anne's feelings.

Leaning forward, Louis grabbed the jar of sugar Anne kept on the counter and put a few large scoops of sugar in it, followed by a splash of milk. He was hoping filling it with all the sugar and milk would tame the strong taste of whatever tea this was, but when he took another sip, he couldn’t stop his face from screwing up in disgust. The sugar and milk just made the tea even more disgusting, if possible.

“Oh, stop it, Harry,” Anne said teasingly, taking the cup out of Louis’ hands before dumping it down the sink and rinsing it out. “And it’s a real shame about the two of you. I was hoping to get some good dirt on my son,” she said, smiling at Louis over her shoulder. She poured some more boiling water into the cup, then stood up on her tippy toes and grabbed a few boxes of tea out of the cupboard.

“You and Harry are the same. Neither one of you can stand the tea normal people drink,” she winked at him and put the boxes of tea in front of him, watching as he instantly went for the yorkshire tea, which is exactly what her son would have done.

“Where is Harry, anyway?” Louis asked, trying to act as nonchalant as he could. He put his tea bag in his cup and let it sit for a minute before he set it on the plate and put spoonful after spoonful of sugar, and a small splash of milk.

Anne tapped her fingers on the side of the cup, ready to blurt out where he was, but she quickly caught herself and swallowed thickly. “H-He’s at school, wasn’t he?” she asked, even though she knew Harry was not at school.

“No, he wasn’t?” Louis asked rather than stated. He pursed his lips off the the side and began chewing on the inside of his lip, his horrible nervous habit. If Anne thought that Harry had went to school, and he didn’t, then where the hell did he go?

“Oh, I could have swore he did,” Anne said, and she felt guilty for lying to Louis, but she was also excited too. Her small little fibs wouldn’t even compare to what she was covering up. Disregarding Louis’ question, she changed the subject to see if that would help ease her guilt. “Will you be staying for dinner? We’re ordering out tonight,”

Louis watched as the suddenly nervous woman began to fumble through the drawer she was standing in front of. “Sure,” he said, keeping his eyes on her. He didn’t plan on staying for dinner, but with Anne fidgeting and acting the way she was, he knew she was hiding something from him and one way or the other, he would get the truth out of her.

~~~~~~~~

**_First Person:_ **

The sun was beginning to set by the time me, Anne, Gemma and Robin set down at the table to eat. I set in my usual seat, as well as everyone else did, and Harry’s seat stayed empty, which was an odd feeling to me.

“How was your day today, Gemma?” Robin asked the girl sitting beside him as he scooped out some chow mein on his plate.

“It was good. I had to buy…” I zoned out of their conversation and began to dish up a little food on my plate. I went with orange chicken, rice, and an egg roll. The food smelled amazing, and looked extremely delicious, but I felt weird eating with Harry’s family when Harry wasn’t here.

Placing a napkin on my lap, I sighed in defeat because I was honestly hungry, and took a small bite of the rice. “And Louis, how was yours?” Robin asked me just as I shoveled another spoonful of rice into my mouth.

My eyes widened, and I didn’t know whether or not I should continue chewing, or just spit it out on my plate. Smiling sheepishly at him, I held up a finger and chewed as fast as I could before I swallowed. “Me?” I asked him once I finished. I knew he said my name, and that he was talking to me. It was obvious by the way he was staring expectantly at me, but I just wasn’t used to having someone ask me how my day was.

Nodding, Robin smiled at me and set his fork down on the table so he could give all his undivided attention to me. I looked at Anne, who was smiling at me, then to Gemma, who just nodded and gave me a soft, warm smile of encouragement.

“It was good,” I said, taking a drink of my water to help with my dry throat.

“Annnnddd did you have any tests?” Robin asked, pressing to know more about my uninteresting, uneventful, and ultimately shitty day.

“Yeah, I had a test in math and history. I got extra credit on my history test, and I managed to get a hundred on my math test,”

“That’s good, you did good,” nodding his head once at me, Robin shifted in his seat like anyone would do if they were uncomfortable, then turned back down to focus on his meal.

I did the same. I ate my meal in silence, just blocking out their conversations that didn’t involve me. The only time I did listen was when Anne’s phone began to ring and she apologized because she had to take it because it was Harry. My ears had pricked at the name, but I stayed looking at my almost empty plate.

“Hello dear,” She said, followed by a few ‘Mhhms’. “Louis?” I looked up at my name and seen she was staring directly at me. “Yeah, he’s here,” her eyes were blank, giving no insight as to what her and Harry was talking about, and why they were talking about me. “Yeah--okay. Hurry home, I saved you a plate,” a few more beats of silence, then Anne hung up her phone and set it on the table.

Sighing, she smiled at all of us, “Harry is on his way in,” she said, and I was going to ask her what she meant by ‘on his way in’, but before I could ask, I heard the backdoor in their kitchen opening, followed by someone grumbling.

“Don’t fucking try to trip me, stupid fucking house,” Harry grumbled, his face in a deep frown when he stumbled into the dining room. “The fucking door tried to trip me,” Harry explained when he seen everyone looking at him.

I giggled, Anne laughed, Gemma related to his problem, and Robin just gave him the ‘are you serious’ look. Harry flipped all of us off, then took his seat next to me and grabbed the plate Anne handed him. “Hey,” he said to me, his knee brushing against mine. He looked at me for a second, smiled, then looked down at his food and began to inhale it.

“What were you doing out there?” I asked him, glancing at the entrance he had just walked through, then back to him.

“Playing with the fucking birds,” he said with a mouth full of food. “I was mowing the lawn,” he said when he seen me roll my eyes.

I furrowed my eyebrows because I didn’t hear the lawn mower going, but then again, they are rich so they might have one that makes no noise. It made sense, too, because their backyard is big enough to have it take him that long to mow the lawn. But he wasn’t sweaty, and he didn’t stink. He smelt like those flowers in that meadow he had taken me to.

“Alright,” I mumbled, satisfied with his answer. He may smell like flowers, but what else would he be lying about? What would he have done back there that was approved by Anne?

Sighing, I pushed my plate off to the side and waited for Harry to finish his meal before I excused myself and stood up. I took my plate into the kitchen, scraped it off, and put it in the sink. I then grabbed my bag off the stool I had placed it on before and walked through the quiet house and towards the door.

“Weren’t planning on leaving without saying goodbye, were you?” Harry asked, his voice ringing out from behind me. I jumped and whirled around, silently thanking whatever god there was that I didn’t fall on my ass, or hit into his chest.

“N-No. I was just putting on my shoes,”

“Your shoes are on,” I looked down at my feet and cursed myself because sure enough, there were my old, worn out shoes on my feet.

“I was going to--yeah. I was going to leave without saying goodbye,” I said, giving up trying to lie to him. It was no use, really. He seemed to know when I was and wasn’t lying, even if I didn’t know it sometimes.

“Why?”

“I don’t know,” shrugging, I set my bag down on the floor next to the door and took a step closer, “I guess I just figured you wanted your space,”

“Why would you think that,” taking a step closer, Harry’s eyes locked with mine.

“You haven’t talked to me much since Monday,” I whispered, feeling as the oxygen began to grow less and less the closer he got.

“I’ve been busy, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to spend time with you or that I want ‘my space’” using air quotations, Harry shook his head at me and a little ‘v’ formed between his eyebrows. “Is that why you haven’t talked to me at school?”

“No. I just haven’t been up to talking. I-It wasn’t because of you. And besides, if you wanted to talk to me, you could have talked to me. I don’t always have to make the first move,” I switched around the roles, and this time, I was the one who seemed upset. But really, I was just trying to take all the attention off of me and my horrid week.

Rolling his eyes, Harry took another step closer and grabbed ahold of my hips. He pulled me forward, our hips bumping against each other before our chest. He peered down at me with his enchanting green eyes and smiled that damn heart fluttering smile. “So, now you’re mad at me?”

“No, i’m not… I’m simply just saying that you could have talked to me if you had wanted to,”

“Oh, princess, what am I going to do with you?” the nickname making my stomach clench, I bit the corner of my lip and lifted up one shoulder in a half shrug.

“I could ask you the same,”

Harry smiled again, and my own lips tugged into a smile. His curls bouncing around as he shook his head, Harry lifted up one of his hands and grasped my chin, holding my head in place before he bent down and placed a soft kiss on my lips.

“Can I show you something?” he asked quietly, his lips still pressing lightly against mine.

Feeling like I just smoked an entire bowl to myself, I nodded and let him lace his fingers with mine. We walked back through the hallway, through the dining room where Harry got a not so subtle thumbs up from Anne, then into the kitchen and out the backdoor. The air was chilly from the storm that was brewing in the sky, so I curled in closer to Harry’s side.

We walked across the lawn and towards the trail me and Harry had taken to that meadow/pond. “Why are we going back here?” I asked him. It was dark out here. I could barely even see where we were walking, so I didn’t understand why we were walking out into the middle of the forest, where I would undeniably get lost if Harry left me for even a second.

“You’ll see,” he merely said. I sighed in frustration and went to pull away from him, but then I realized I couldn’t see shit and clung onto his shirt even tighter.

Walking in silence, except for the occasional crunch of our feet walking across the sticks and rocks, and the crickets singing beautifully in the background. It took us a good five minutes before we came to an abrupt stop and Harry let go of me. “Did you bring me out here to murder me?” I asked jokingly, but the look Harry gave me did not help with the fact I was already nervous.

“You’ll see,” he said, smirking, but it didn’t seem like it came directly from his heart. “Now, follow me,” I watched as he pulled the bush open, but he let it go the moment I stepped forward and turned to face me. “I-I’m new to these things, so before you see anything, just know I tried,”

“What are you talking about?”

Harry's hands began to shake and he began to fidget a little. Giving me one last worried look, Harry sighed and opened the bushes once again. I was worried about what was on the other side of the bush, but I still crouched down and carefully made my way through the spiky thorns and sharp sticks.

It was dark where I was standing, with my back facing the pond as I waited for Harry to return, but I watched as light danced on the leaves and brightened the dark space. “It's bad,” Harry mumbled, standing straight up.

I began to grow more and more curious the longer I stayed looking at Harry, who was watching something behind me. “Turn around,” he whispered, and I did just as he said. There, in the middle of the meadow, was a trail that looked like was made by someone mowing over it, but that's not what caught my attention. Small lanterns lit the pathway, and there was small red things littering the ground. Taking a few cautious steps forward, I realized they were rose petals.

“Keep going,” Harry whispered from behind me, his hand on my back giving me a gentle shove forward.

I had yet to see what this was all for, but I could already feel the burning pressure behind my eyes. Trying to fight back my tears, I followed the pathway of roses. It went on for a few feet, then it opened up to the gravel that set just before the pond. On the gravel was a stand with arrows pointing in another direction, directing me to walk around the pond and onto the other side where I seen something burning bright.

I turned around to look at Harry, and he smiled at me and gestured for me to keep going. I began to walk slowly, trying my best not to step on the roses on the ground. I didn't know what this was for, or what Harry's intentions were, but I didn't care. This was all so beautiful.

The end of the trail opened up into another small meadow that had a checkered blanket laying out on it, and a box of something I couldn't see. I heard Harry move from behind me, and when I turned to see where he was going, he was already standing next to the thing that I saw earlier that was bright.

There were candles in what appeared to be a rectangle, but the longer I looked, the more the letters began to appear. ‘Prom’ is what the letters the candles formed, and I gasped loudly before looking up at Harry.

“I know I was a dick about it before, and I'm sorry, but Louis Tomlinson, will you go to prom with me?” Harry asked, his sharp features illuminated in the faint glow of the lights.

A tear slipped past my eye and trailed down my cheek, followed by another one, and another one. They just kept coming, and I couldn't stop them. “Oh, Harry,” I breathed out, the tears starting to fall more steadily now.

This was everything I've ever wanted and more. I never imagined being asked to prom, and never in a way as beautiful as this. “Y-Yes, I'll go to prom with you,” I sobbed out, running to him and practically jumping into his arms.

I held onto him tightly, my arms wrapped around his neck and his arms wrapped around my waist. He lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist and buried my face into his neck. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” I repeated over and over again.

Harry has been such a positive thing in my life, and he has never failed to amaze me, but tonight, I was completely blown away. He could have not taken me, or he could have simply just asked me. He didn't have to go through all this trouble to make a prom proposal as beautiful as this.

“I love it,” I whispered, my tears staining his shirt. Harry nuzzled his stubbly cheek against my forehead and placed a gentle kiss on my temple.

“I was hoping you would,”

With me still clinging to his body, Harry began to walk forward before he set down and placed me in his lap. “I need you to look up at me,” he said quietly, his hand sneaking under my chin and grasping the tip of it, forcing me to look up at him with my puffy, bloodshot eyes. “I never meant to hurt your feelings. I have never been into school dances, but I realized it wasn't about what made me happy, it was about what made you happy. And all I really want is for you to be happy,”

“I'm more than happy,” I said, my voice thick and raspy. I cleared my throat and sniffled. “T-This is perfect Harry, thank you,” voice still raspy and grating on my nerves, I ignored it and pecked the tip of Harry's nose.

I pulled back and just admired him while he would let me. With the glow from the candles, and the lanterns, Harry's face was visible but I couldn't make out each and every detail. I could see his eyes, his mouth, and his nose, but the space surrounding his eyes looked like dark pits of nothing. Nothing but my Harry.

“I…” shushing him, I pressed my finger against his lip and smiled a stretched, watery smile.

“I want to give you something, too,” I whispered, keeping my finger on his lips which made his words muffled.

“What?” eyebrows knitted together, Harry tried looking away from me but I held his gaze.

“My virginity,”

It was blunt and the words seemed to linger in the air longer than I wished they would have, but I didn't regret offering it to him. I vowed I wouldn't have sex until I found the right person. A person that made my heart beat fast, my blood surge through my veins, my stomach twist in knots, and my head hazy… a person that made me feel loved,  and I knew I found that person. I didn't care if I was rushing into things or that I might possibly regret this, because right now, all I felt was this odd fuzzy feeling in my body, and I knew that, even if i tried denying it.. it was a side affect of being in love.

_ And I, Louis Tomlinson, am in love with Harry Styles. _

_ ~~~~~~ _

**_Third Person:_ **

Feathery chestnut hair was fanned out around Louis. His eyes were screwed shut, his lips parted, and his cheeks were flushed. Small moans and whimpers left his mouth as he desperately grabbed for anything he could reach, but he was disappointed when he didn't feel what he  _ actually  _ wanted. He didn't want a handful of blanket, he wanted a handful of Harry.

“Shh, baby, I'm right here,” Harry said quietly as he slotted himself between the boys spread legs, his knees hitting Louis bum.

“Harry, please,” Louis pleaded, his leaking cock throbbing in his trousers. He felt as a drop of precum collected in his tip before it pooled over and slid down his shaft, going over each vein that stuck out in Louis’ penis.

Whimpering, Louis rutted his hips up, a breathy moan falling from his wet lips when his boner brushed against Harry's. “Stop,” the warning growl had Louis freezing. He cracked his eye open and looked up at Harry, panting as he did so.

“Please,” a simple word, but it did so much more to Harry than he'd care to admit.

A groan lodging itself in his throat, Harry nodded and scooted down, then hooked his fingers in Louis pants and pulled them down. His boxers came down as well, his cock springing free and hitting against the side of Harry's hand before it fell against Louis’ cloth covered tummy.

Harry moaned and looked down at his hand, seeing the precum that was splattered across the back of it from the tip of Louis’ penis. Licking the back of his hand, Harry moaned at the bitter taste and couldn't stop himself from bowing his head down and sucking the tip of his penis in his mouth.  He sucked skillfully, his cheeks hollowing out as he pushed his head down further until he felt Louis nudging against the back of his throat. Growling around his mouthful, Harry swirled his tongue around his shaft and felt as a vein throbbed against his tongue.

Harry's cock throbbed along with his heartbeat and god, he was ready. He was more than ready. He had been ready since the first time he seen the plump ass in those tight skinny jeans, but he had never been as ready as he was now.

“I want you on your stomach for now,” Harry said, letting Louis’ penis fall from his mouth. He licked his lips, savoring the way Louis tasted, then wiped the saliva off with the back of his hand.

Quickly, or as quickly as his fumbling hands would allow him to go, Harry tugged Louis shirt and hoodie up and over his head and threw them off to the side. Eyes straying down to Louis’ small pooch on his tummy, Harry grabbed ahold of his hips and flipped him over.

Pink flesh filled his vision, and Harry growled when he realizes this is his to do with as he pleases. Between the swells of Louis’ ass was a small pale hole, and Harry couldn’t stop himself from tracing his pointer finger over the puckered hole. He chose to ignore the small gasp that Louis emitted, and instead, he focused on grabbing the green bottle of lube out of the basket he had brought with them.

Squirting an insane amount of lube on his fingers, Harry tossed the bottle off to the side and used his lube-free hand to spread Louis’s cheeks apart. “Relax, baby,” a lubed finger circling around Louis puckered hole, Harry held his breath as he slowly pressed the blunt tip of his finger into Louis’ tight hole. The boy clenched around his finger tightly and moaned, the sound a mixture between pain and pleasure.

“More, more, more,” Louis chanted, pressing his ass down further and Harry watched as his finger disappeared in between Louis’ asscheeks.

Harry had planned on going slow, on taking this nice and calm so Louis didn't experience an ounce of pain, but the moment he felt Louis clench around his finger, he was gone. He has been living a life without sex for what seemed like forever, so now that he had a chance to have sex again, he was going to wreck the small boy.

Harry began to work his finger in and out of Louis, letting him adjust to the sudden intrusion before he’s forcing his middle finger into his tiny hole, watching him tense up, then melt in little shivers. “Harry, more,” Louis moans, squirming beneath Harry’s large body. And fuck, he’s pounding into him with his fingers, scissoring his fingers to spread him properly, spurred by his muffled little noises.

Harry brushes the tip of his fingers against Louis’ prostate and watches as the boys back arches, shoving his perky ass back into his hand and making his long fingers nudge deeper into him.  “Are you ready for me, Princess, ready for me to stretch you?” Harry growls, curving his fingers and rubbing Louis’ walls as he pulls out his fingers.

They fall out of Louis with a loud ‘pop’ and Harry growls when he sees the boys stretched hole constricting around nothing, searching for something to fill it up again and make it feel full. “Please, Harry, Fuck me,” Louis’ mewls, shoving his ass back further so it hits against Harry's hard on that's barely confined in his tight skinny jeans.

Growling, Harry yanks down his pants. The cool air hitting against his overheated penis is painful, but it didn't last for long before he was grabbing Louis by the hips and flipping him over so they were face to face, the boys legs bent at the knees and falling loosely on the blanket beneath their bodies. Lining himself up, Harry began prodding at his entrance. He screwed his eyes shut tightly and began to slowly press his penis into Louis’ still incredibly tight hole. Tightness is all he knows as he forces himself to push forward, to continue going until he feels the back of Louis’ plush thighs pressing against the front of his.

“Fuck, Louis, so damn tight,” Harry gasped out, his hands grasping at Louis’ hips almost painfully tight. He knew there would be hand shaped bruises there tomorrow, but all he was focused on now was the velvety walls clenching tightly around his cock.

He finally felt his hips pressing against Louis thighs, meaning he has bottomed out. He moans loudly and forces himself to stay looking down at the boys withering body, rather than keeping his eyes closed as pleasure rips up his spine.

Second’s in, Harry’s through waiting and he slowly pulls his hips back before snapping them forward, burying his cock in Louis’ ass as deep as possible. Palming at Louis’ sharp hips, Harry lifts him up and angles his cock so his thrusts are deep and effortless. “Fuck,” Harry moans, pleasure pouring over his body.

The intense feeling pushing him closer to insanity, Harry finds himself lowering his head and clasping his lips around a soft spot on Louis’ neck. He sucks hard, his tongue moving over the skin to soothe the irritated skin. While his mouth is working on Louis’ neck relentlessly, making purple marks that range in size, his cock is pounding into Louis’ sweet little hole.

Soon, Louis is thrusting his hips upwards and matching Harry’s thrusts, creating a sickeningly beautiful sound of flesh on flesh that echoes throughout the quiet forest around them. Besides the green apple lube Harry had drenched not only his cock in, but Louis’ asshole too, he can smell the heavy scent of pine from the trees and the sweet scent of the flowers that surrounded them.

Louis’ hands fist in Harry’s hair and he is tugging at it furiously, the boy having no idea what to do but he needed to do something to release all these feelings that are coursing through his body. “Harder, Harry, harder,” Louis sobs out, his body erupted in goosebumps when Harry began to kiss his way across his neck and down his chest.

“If harder is what you want, then harder is what you will get,” Harry growled, his lips vibrating against Louis collarbone. He picks up speed, his ball sack hitting against Louis’ ass and making a loud noise that is barely masked by their loud moans.

Angling his cock so it’s hitting against Louis’ sweet spot. He is merciless as he pounds into Louis, his cock hitting against that same spot over and over again and soon, the boy is screaming loudly in pleasure. “I’m close, Harry. I’m so close,” he whimpers, his small hands untangling from Harry’s hair just so he can begin to claw desperately at the thin blanket beneath them.

Everything suddenly stops around Harry when pulls his head back and his eyes lock with Louis’. Blue orbs is all he sees, all he knows, and his damn heart flips in his chest and plummets the the pit of his stomach. Those damn innocent orbs stare up at him in wonder and amazement, but then the veils slam shut and Louis is screaming loudly, his fingernails digging into Harry’s back and leaving red, stinging marks as his jizz squirts up and in between them in small spurts.

He clenches tightly around Harry’s cock, his entire body shaking and spazzing beneath Harry’s, and the curly haired boy couldn’t take it anymore. Lowering his head, he clasps his teeth around the red of Louis’ nipple and sucks hard, trying to keep his moans silenced as he too follows after Louis’. Hips stuttering and hands gripping Louis’ tiny hips firmly, Harry cums, filling the boy to the brink.

“Fuck,” a muffled moan vibrates Louis’ nipple and the small boy shivers at the feeling. His entire body was sensitive, but he was content right now. High out of his mind on this amazing feeling that he couldn’t explain, he raked his fingers up Harry’s spine, making a breathless ‘oomph’ noise when Harry’s body collapses on top of his, his now softening cock still buried deep inside of him.

Harry’s body feeling like jelly due to one of the most mind blowing orgasms he was ever had, he rests against Louis, knowing he is probably squishing the boy but he couldn’t will his body to move. His brain was disconnected from his body, but he was still aware of everything around him. From Louis’ body still clenched around his cock and swollen nipple in his mouth, to the vanilla scent that lingered on Louis’ skin. He knows exactly how his trousers are still hugging his thighs, and how his chest is pressed against Louis’. He could feel the fast paced heartbeat against his chest, and he could feel the dull fingernails dragging up and down his spine.

But the thing he was most painfully aware of was the feeling that was rooted deep in his heart. He had known for a while now that he was more than just a little fond of the blue-eyed sassy boy, but he never cared to admit it. Until now. With his blood singing in his veins and his sweaty forehead nudging against the space he had grown fond of, the space that always smelt like vanilla no matter how hard Louis’ tried to get rid of it, he tilted his head up and placed a delicate kiss on the curve of Louis’ jaw.

For once in his life, Harry was at peace with himself, even if it was for a short amount of time. His heart was no longer fighting with his brain, and he was no longer at war with himself. He was, shockingly enough, okay with the unsettling fact that he might be in love with Louis Tomlinson.


	30. Chapter 30

_ Breaths mingling together, Louis turned over on his side and stared up at Harry, his bare chest pressing against Harry’s bare side. His hand traced over the large tattoo that took up most of his torso, covering the abs Louis was finally able to touch. “Was I good?” Louis asked quietly, embarrassment flaring brightly on his cheeks.  _

_ Eyes glued to the butterfly that he found odd, but beautiful, he couldn’t help but wiggle the lower half of his body. He was incredibly sore, and still sticky even though Harry had cleaned him up, but he was completely satisfied with himself and everything right now. “It was.. Really good,” a lazy smile tugging at Harry’s lips, he looked down at Louis’ finger that was just now tracing over the right wing. _

_ Moving one of his arms from behind his head, he quickly reached down and grabbed ahold of Louis’ hand. Pressing their palms together, Harry lifted their hands up and just stared at them. His hand was incredibly larger than Louis’, giving him the chance to bend the tips of his fingers down and over Louis’. Their hands stayed like that, pressed together and hovering over Louis’ head and Harry’s torso. _

_ “Are you lying to me?” Louis asked, voice hushed. Wiggling his fingers, that were still trapped beneath Harry’s, he bit down on the inside of his cheek and looked up at Harry. His pupils were still blown from what had him and Harry had been up to earlier, and his lips were terribly swollen from not only him biting on them, but Harry too. “Are you… Or would you ever lie to me?” he asked, speaking a little louder this time so he knew Harry could hear. _

_ Their eyes locked, and Louis held Harry’s swimming gaze. His emerald eyes were reflecting Louis’ face, which was still lit up from the lanterns that were glowing brightly, and Louis found himself gasping almost inaudibly… Almost. In the reflection, he could see himself, but he didn’t look like himself. His eyes seemed brighter, his face rosier, his lips plumper, and he had this certain glow that made him look nothing like himself. _

_ “What would I get out of lying to you? I mean, yeah. I could say that it was terrible, and possibly lose you, or I could say it was the best sex ever, even if it wasn’t, just so I could get more sloppy sex, because hey, it’s still sex, right?” Harry paused, his eyebrows furrowing. He had seen the way Louis’ eyes wavered, and he knew he was hurting him rather than assuring and comforting him. “I mean, ugh,” letting go of Louis’ hand, Harry raked his fingers through his hair then set up so him and Louis were face to face. “No, I would never lie to you. If I didn’t like the sex, I would tell you. I mean, I could have sex with anyone I wanted to, so if you weren’t good, why would I stick around?” _

_ Louis knew Harry wasn’t meaning to hurt him with his words, but he still felt a small ball of pain lodging itself into his heart before it spread throughout his entire chest. But like he said, he knew Harry wasn’t meaning to hurt him. The older boy may be good at a lot of things, but he was never really good at expressing his feelings. Much like Louis. Swallowing back his ridiculous emotions, Louis forced a smile and reached a hand up and pressed it flat against Harry’s cheek. _

_ The older teen nuzzled his face into the small hand and smiled back at him, his chest deflating when he realized he actually didn’t fuck up for once and was able to speak something that maybe made a little sense. “I was hoping you would stick around because of my amazing personality and hilarious jokes. Not just because of my amazing sex,” Louis whispered, his thumb brushing along Harry’s lower lip. _

_ Snorting, Harry rolled his eyes. “Yeah, sure. We’ll call your many different personalities amazing, as long as we both agree I’m the one with the hilarious jokes.” _

_ “Oh, please. You think your jokes are so great, but they are really stupid and people just laugh because they don’t want the special child to feel left out,” pulling back, Louis’ puffed out his chest and cleared his throat a few times before he brushed his hair in front of his face and looked down at Harry. “Why did the baboon ask the giraffe ‘Why the long face?’” Trying to make himself sound like Harry, Louis looked around much like Harry did a while ago at school before he leaned to the side, patted Harry’s chest and said, “Because he thought his neck was his face,” falling to the side, Louis erupted into loud, manish laughs, which sounded like deformed squacks, but he was trying to sound like Harry did and even though the older teen was slightly annoyed, he found the younger boy’s reenactment enduring. _

_ “You’re such a dork,” Harry said, his head shaking as he quietly laughed. He gently shoved Louis’ shoulder when he tipped his head back and let out one of the most annoying noises anyone has ever heard, which sounded exactly like one of Harry’s retarded laughs. _

_ Wiping tears away from his eyes, Louis’ rubbed his aching stomach and climbed back up onto his knees, but made sure his butt didn’t touch the back of his thighs because it was really starting to hurt. “Can I be a cute dork?” he asked, batting his eyelashes. He leaned forward, making it so he was now on his hands and knees, and began to slowly crawl towards Harry. He began to bat his eyelashes and made his bottom lip protrude, which made his blue orbs grow even rounder and softer. _

_ “As long as you’re only my cute dork,” Harry whispered, his heart expanding more and more the longer he stared at Louis. Blinking slowly, like he was confused by Harry’s words, Louis finished crawling the rest of the way up so he was now sitting between Harry’s legs. _

_ “If I am only your cute dork, would that make you my cuddly bad ass? And only mine?” Louis asked, his hands splaying on his nearly barethighs. His boxers hugged his thighs tightly, the thin material being the only thing covering his body. _

_ Harry pursed his lips to the side and began to tape his chin with his pointer finger. Was he ready to give himself to Louis yet? Would he really be willing to risk saying he was Louis’, when the boy could, at any moment, decide he didn’t want anything to do with him again. Laughing internally, Harry shook his head. He was overthinking this. It wasn’t like he was confessing his undying love for the boy. Well, not that there was anything to confess. _

_ “If you are mine, then I am yours,” Harry said, nodding his head. He looked down at Louis, and his heart felt like it exploded when he seen that shy smile Louis was directing his way. _

_ “Harry Styles is mine?” Louis asked out loud, the words sounding so odd but they felt so good to say. He lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Harry, holding him in a tight embrace. “Thank you. Thank you for everything,” Louis whispered, getting ready to pull back because Harry hadn’t moved, but then a pair of strong arms were wrapping around his waist and he was being crushed to the other body. _

_ “No, thank you for showing me there is more to life than fighting, parties and random hookups.” _

~~~~

~1 week later~

Shoulders squared, eyes straight forward, and hands in tight fists, I stayed focused on a blank spot on the wall in this boring ass store. My eyes would occasionally drift to the back of the store, by the suits, which is where my mum and Louis were. They were both gushing over suits that I could wear to prom, and every few seconds, Louis would giggle before looking over at me. I caught him looking every time, and he would giggle even louder and quickly look away.

We’ve been here for over an hour and we have yet to find a suit for either of us to wear. We’ve, well Louis’, tried on multiple suits and despite my reassurance that he looked good, he claimed that it wasn’t ‘the right suit’. I was trying not to seem bored or unhappy right now, considering it took us the entire week to convince Louis to let my mum buy him a suit for prom. He said he didn’t want to feel like he was getting a handout, and that he would come up with the money on his own, but after my mum pumped him full of sugary cookies, lemonade and promises that this wasn’t a hand out, but rather a gift, he finally agreed.

“Harry! Come here, we found the perfect suit!” My mum hollered, her hand frantically gesturing for me to come over. I rolled my eyes and walked over to where they were. Leaning against one of the changing room doors, I looked at the suit my mum was proudly holding up and I had to swallow back the snarky comment that instantly popped into my head. It was a green suit with a red tie and white shirt.

“It’s not really me,” I said, trying to not sound as rude as I wanted to be.

“Are you sure? I think the green will really make your eyes pop out!”

“Yeah, no. Not me.” I would rather not look like I was about to attend a Christmas party.

Louis took the suit from my mum and held it up against my chest, then shook his head. “Definitely not, but I do know what is,” he said, throwing the shirt at me before he scurried over to the other side of the store.

“What is that boy up to?” my mum asked me, her head peeking just above the racks of clothes.

“I have no idea,” I sighed, finally looking down at her when I lost sight of Louis. “He’s probably picking the second most ridiculous suit in this store,”

“Which was the first?”

“Yours,” I snorted and held up the god awful suit. My mom swatted my chest, then ripped the suit out of my hand and carelessly slung it over one of the racks. She held up a finger and pressed it to her lips, then winked.

We both laughed, ignoring all the glares we got from the employees because we were both being too loud. A few seconds later Louis came running back over to us, a black thing behind his back that he was trying to hide, but he was too small to completely do so.

“I think this,” holding up a simple black suit jacket that hung on a hanger, “Will go perfectly with a pair of your black skinny jeans, a black button up shirt and your weird black dress up shoes,” he said, pride gleaming in his blue eyes.

I thought about the outfit for a second, and I was honestly shocked that it wasn’t the most displeasing sight my mind has conjured up. “That works for me,” I said and shrugged.

“It’s a lovely idea, but absolutely not. Harry will wear a suit,” my mum said, looking pointedly at me.

“I would love if he wears a suit, but both you and I know this is the closest thing to a suit that Harry will wear,” Louis said, coming to my rescue which was weird. It was usually me that came to his rescue, not the other way around.

“Fine, fine. But we will be getting you a new shirt, pair of jeans and shoes. You will not be going in those things that have rips in the knees. And what are we doing for a tie?” she looked at me, then Louis, then turned around and walked directly to a tall rack of numerous ties.

“Do I have to wear a tie?” I asked, not intending for it to come out a whine but it did.

“Yes,” both Louis and my mom said in unison.

“Great, the tag team is back,” I said, rolling my eyes but it was in more of a fond way. I acted annoyed when these two got together and agreed on almost everything, but I secretly loved it. It was nice having someone around that my mum liked, and was comfortable enough around that she felt that she could pick on me with them.

“Shut up,” once again, said in unison. Louis and my mum looked at each other, then they turned to the rack of ties and began to talk about which one would look better.

Thirty ties later and they both sighed, obviously giving up. “I’m done, we can go now,” Anne said, wiping her forehead off with the back of her hand.

“You act like shopping is such a hard thing,”

“With you, Harold, it is,” Louis said, using the name he always seemed to use when he was upset with me, or just wanted to get on my nerves.

“Okay, Lewis,” I said, grinning, “Wait, don’t we need to get Louis’ suit?”

“Nope, we already got it. You were too busy in lala land,”

“Then where is it?”

Louis blushed and looked down at the ground, his hands visibly tightening around the hanger with my shirt on it. “Iwastooshort,” he rushed out, head still bowed which made it absolutely impossible for me to hear what he said.

“What?”

“I was too short, so they have to make the sleeves and pants shorter,” he said, glaring at me.

“Ohhh, so you’re not just my little shorty?”

Huffing, Louis punched my arm then stormed past me. “I’m putting the shirt on the counter,” Louis yelled over his shoulder before he did just what he said. He threw the shirt on the counter, nearly hitting the lady behind it, then stomped out of the store.

“I’ll go get him,” I sighed. I took long strides out of the store and out into the crowded sidewalk. I looked around for a second, then spotted Louis walking down the sidewalk, his brown head bobbing just above everyone else’s shoulders. “Tomlinson!” I shouted, and just like I expected, his head snapped around and his eyes widened.

Don’t run. Please, don’t run.

Going against everything I wished, he began to run past all the people. Closing my eyes for a brief second, I took a deep breath then began to run after him. “Move… Don’t touch me… I will elbow you in the face,”

The crowd of people began to thin out, and that allowed me to get to Louis faster. I was just within reach of him when the clumsy ass looked behind him at me, got scared, tripped over his feet and feel forward. Luckily for him, he hit into a guy. Bad thing for me, the guy spilled his coffee all over his suit and instantly pushed Louis backwards once he regained his footing.

“What the fuck, man! I have a meeting to be at in five minutes and you just ruined my shirt!” he yelled at Louis, his free hand poking at Louis chest.

“I’m sorry,” Louis said, his back hunching as he coward back.

I walked up behind Louis, just in time too, because the guy shoved him a little harder and Louis stumbled backwards, only to hit into my chest. “Jesus, don’t you fucking watch where you are going? You just hit into another guy’s chest, you fucking mo…”

“I’d refrain from finishing that sentence,” I said, my voice becoming raspier and deeper. “And if I were you, i’d take you, and the stick that’s up your ass, and just walk away,”

“Oh, and who the fuck are you?”

“Not somebody you want to yell at, that’s for sure,”

“Unbelievable,” the guy growled. He looked at me, then glared at Louis. His jaw clenching, he threw the rest of his cup on the ground, making it so it splashed up on Louis’ white skinny jeans, then shoved past me and began to walk in the direction I just came from.

“You alright?” I asked Louis, my voice back to its normal raspiness. I placed my hand on the small of his back, my fingers curling so I could grip his shirt. He was shaking violently, his small body trembling beneath my hand. “Shh, it’s alright,” I pulled him against my chest and glared in the direction the guy had went in. If I wasn’t trying to straighten up my act, I would have bashed that guys head into the fucking concrete.

“I’m still mad at you,” he said, pushing me off of him.

“For what?” I asked, incredulous.

“For pushing until I told you why we didn’t have my suit,” he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You’re such a baby,”

“Am not,”

“Are so,”

“Fine, then you’re a pedophile. You pedophile.”

“Not my fault I like sweet asses,” smirking, I grabbed ahold of Louis arm and pulled him back against my chest. “Now, since I am already a pedophile, let me give my baby a hug,”

Louis resisted for a second, then melted into the hug and wrapped his arms around my torso. He buried his head in my chest and squoze me tightly, and I wasn’t against it. It felt nice having him hug me as tightly as he was. “You’re a pervert,” he mumbled against my chest.

“I know,”

Standing there for a few seconds, Louis pulled back and looked up at me. “Give me a piggy back ride back to the store? My little legs are tired?” he puffed out his bottom lip and batted his eyelashes.

I refuse. I will not give him a piggy back ride just because he asked for one…. And here come the puppy dog eyes.

“Fine,” I breathed out. Turning around, I crouched down and held both arms behind my back.

“What are you doing?”

“Crouching down so you can get up, what else?”

“I can jump, you know?”

“Can not,” Ha! I highly doubt he can jump up that high.

“Wanna bet?”

Not really, but whatever. He can break his ass trying to jump up high enough to climb on my back. I honestly don’t want to fight.

Shaking my head, I stood up straight and looked at him over my shoulder. “If you fall and crack your head open, I hope you know the first words I will tell you when you wake up are ‘I told you so,”

“Then don’t let me fall.” Oh, love. I wouldn’t dream of it.

Looking back down at the ground, I held my arms behind my back again and waited a few seconds. I began to grow impatient, but then I felt Louis grabbing ahold of my shoulders, followed by a loud grunt and his legs wrapping around my waist. I swayed a little, but managed to regain my balance. My hands instantly grabbed ahold of his ankles, and he clasped his arms around my neck so they were tight, but not too tight.

“Onward, my trusty stead!” Louis said, his one arm gripping tightly around my neck so he could point forward.

“Shut it, or i’ll drop you on your ass and not regret it,” I growled, but kissed the corner of his hand. I jumped slightly, repositioning Louis just a little bit, then began to walk forward. I have carried Louis to bed once, so I knew that he wasn’t too heavy, but with him like this, he felt lighter than my backpack.

Hooking his chin on my shoulder, Louis rubbed his nose against the underside of my jaw, making goosebumps instantly arise on my skin. “Like what you smell?” I asked him quietly, my thumb subconsciously rubbing small circles on his ankle, which was peaking out of his rolled up skinny jeans.

“You smell like vanilla,” he said quietly, his warm breath ghosting over my neck.

“I wonder why,” I said sarcastically. The past few nights Louis has slept on top of me, his head resting in the crook of my neck, which made me smell heavily of vanilla.

Louis hummed, but didn’t say anything else. We walked in silence the rest of the way to the car, both of us too entrapped in our own world to notice all the people staring at us, and when my mum seen us, she quickly got out of the car and opened the back door. I backed up, then set Louis in the seat and made sure he was buckled up before I closed the door and climbed up front.

The moment I closed my door, I felt a small hand sneaking between the small crack between the door and the seat. When I didn’t react, he began to tug on the sleeve of my shirt until I laced our fingers together.

My mum looked at me and we exchanged a silent conversation before she nodded and said, “We’ll go shopping for the rest tomorrow,”

Me and my mom may not have the best relationship, but she always knows what I am thinking. Even if she says she has no clue what I am thinking, or when I am lying, she always does. All i’ve ever had to do was look at her once and it’s like she sees right through me.

Some days, like today, it’s a blessing. Other days, it gets annoying and I wished I could keep something to myself for once.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is highly unedited! I wanted you guys to see a little bit more of Harry's fears, but I didn't want to go into too much detail yet. I hope this chapter isn't as bad as I am expecting it to be, but i'll still cross my fingers. XD
> 
> Merry (belated) Christmas (And Happy Holidays to you that don't celebrate Christmas), everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful day! :)

“I’m not taking it off,” I said, my childish deficiency showing when I crossed my arms over my chest and stuck my nose in the air. Harry sat in the driver's seat next to me, a look of annoyance on his face as he continuously tried to talk, well more like pressure, me into taking my hoodie off. I refused every time, of course. I was comfortable enough around Harry to be naked, and I trusted his family enough to take my hoodie off around them, but in front of all these people?  _ Yeah, I think not. _

Imagine how bad of a panic attack I would have, and how my skin would burn with all their gazes pinned on my unperfect skin. A shiver of horror runs up my spine at just the thought, and I feel my chest already becoming tight. “I won’t do it,” I sounded weak, vulnerable even, but I couldn’t stop my emotions from showing. I would rather Harry knows how I truly feel about this, rather than bottle up my emotions and do as he wishes just to please him.

_ Ha! Imagine what my Nan would think if I ever did the latter. _

“It’s just inside with my family, Kitten. Please,” he uses that damn voice that he knows I always melt with, but still, I stand my ground and ignore my soupy insides.

“Family I have never met,”

“So? They will love you, I promise. And if you are afraid that they will stare, then I--”

“I’m not  _ afraid _ , Harry. Having anxiety is not about being afraid. I can’t control the way my mind or body works, but even if I could, I wouldn’t force it to shut up and stop working just so I can do something that makes you happy, but me miserable,” I hissed, sounding stupid, obviously, but they were words that needed to be spoken.

“You’re so fucking stubborn, Lewis,”  _ Oh, we are back to Lewis now, are we? _

“Only with you, Harold,” I smiled a twisted smile that formed into a grimace, then I threw open my the door on my side and climbed out. I was done with this conversation, and quite frankly, I was done with him for the night. A voice in my head, which sounds all too much like my Nan, reminds me this is what happens to couples that spend too much time together. And in that moment, I scowl at nothing in particular and continue on my way towards the door that blocks the view of ten or more people I have never even met.

But I can’t stop myself from wondering if me and Harry have been spending too much time together? I mean, I have been staying at his house for a while now, and we see each other at school, so there really was no time we spent away from each other. Maybe it’s time I go back home and spend some time away from Harry, just so I can collect my thoughts before prom, which is in three days.

Sighing, I glared at the door that was three feet away from me and pondered on whether or not I should turn around and demand Harry takes me home, or to walk around for awhile and just let my mind clear itself. With a defeated huff, I glance behind my shoulder and see Harry is talking with one of his older family members, then I duck and run around the side of the house.

It’s dark out here, except for the pale glow of the porch light by their back door. I scan their backyard, and when I seen that there was nothing but a fence blocking their neighbors yard, I decided the next best thing was to sit on the porch step and just enjoy as much quiet time as I could get.

_ God knows there won’t be a quiet moment in that house full of Harry’s noisy family. _

Rubbing my stomach with the palm of my hands, in hopes to loosen the ball of nerves that have formed in it (even though I knew the only thing that would truly help relax my nerves right now was weed, or a nicotine buzz, and I could go for either right about now), I tip my head back and look up at the moon. The moon was bright and shining proudly, it only being a few days before there was a full moon. Surrounding the moon was little stars that twinkled brightly in the sky, though they were dim in comparison to the moon.

“It’s beautiful out here, isn’t it?” A soft, but gruff voice asked. My head snapped in the direction their voice came in, and my eyes landed on a male, mid teens, with light brown hair that was just long enough to touch the tips of his ears, even with it sticking out all over the place. He had gleaming amber eyes that looked like a pot of honey, and a strong jawline that looked perfect with his pointy, but dimpled, chin.

The only thing wrong with him was his nose, and it was small, but pointy. “Yeah, it really is,” I agree quietly, my eyes moving over his buttoned up white shirt, to his brown khakis. Well, there was two things wrong with him. His nose, and his sense of style.

_ Says the one wearing a hoodie and skinny jeans. _

“Sorry to intrude, I just needed to get away from my family and I didn’t think any one was out here. I can leave, if you’d like,” he said after a minute or so passed by with neither one of us speaking.

“No, you’re fine. You can stay. I came back here to get…” I paused mid-sentence, realizing this kid was Harry’s family and probably wouldn’t like me calling Harry annoying, “To clear my mind,” I said instead, smiling softly at him before I looked back at the moon.

I could see him nod his head out of the corner of my eye, but he didn’t say anything, and neither did I. Until, “I haven’t seen you around here before. Are you friends with someone here? Or are you just a stranger sitting in my mums backyard?” he said mum, which means that he is Harry’s cousin and Anne’s nephew.

I laughed awkwardly at what he said, just trying to be nice but everyone knows I can’t fake laugh, and shook my head. “Neither, actually. I’m here with Harry,” I didn’t add the fact that Harry was my boyfriend, or that he dragged me out here against my own free will. Like people always say, somethings are better left unspoken.

Sadness, or something related to that emotion, sparked in the boy’s eyes, but before I could decipher it, it was gone. “You must be Louis, then,” he sounded upset, disappointed even.

“Yeah, how did you know?” My interest spiked the moment I said Harry’s name and he became sad, and I needed answers but I didn’t know if I wanted to pry and end up hurting this kid even more.  _ But I needed to know if he doesn’t like Harry. _

Sighing, he set down next to me, then scooted over a little so his shoulder was pressed against the wall and he was at least a foot away from me. “Anne talks to my mum about you non stop, then my mum talks about you and asks why I can’t be as good or as bright as you,”  _ And there’s my answer. God, I have yet to met this woman both Harry and now this kid have told me about, but I already hated her. _

“I’m not that good,” I offered, not knowing what to say to make him feel better. “Besides, i’m sure you’re good at a lot of things,” I realized then that he didn’t get sad when I mentioned Harry because he didn’t like him, but because he realized who I was. He didn’t even know me prior to just a few minutes ago, but he has been compared to me for god knows how long. We were like polar opposites, almost. He was liked, and was good at things I didn’t like, and he looked completely different than me. He was attractive while I was… Well, me.

He smiled at me, then closed his eyes and let his head rest against the wall. It looked like he wasn’t going to say anything further, so I decided that was my cue to leave. Brushing off my knees, I went to stand up, but he stopped me with just a few words.

“Do you smoke?”

“Sometimes,”

“Would you like one?” I thought about his question for a second, and debated on whether or not I wanted to go inside smelling like cigarettes, but my watering mouth already gave me my answer before I even had time to think.

“Sure,” I set back down and got comfortable and watched as he leaned to the side, his arm gripping the railing to keep him from falling, and reached underneath the staircase to grab something.

Sitting back up, he opened up the black box that was in his hand and pulled out two white sticks, then passed me one and put the other one between his lips. “Thanks,” I said, slotting my own killing stick between my teeth before I fished my lighter, that I take everywhere with me, out of my pocket and lit it.

Smoke clouded my lungs, the feeling both burning, but relieving. Closing my eyes, I exhaled slowly and let myself feel as my skin began to buzz lightly from just one drag from my cigarette. For the next ten minutes me, and the kid I have yet to get the name of, sit there and smoke our cigarettes while talking about things he was good at. And it turns out he is good at very limited things, but he excelled in science.

I had just took another drag off of my smoke and told him I thought he would make a great scientist when a form walked out of the shadows and stood next to me. The kid's eyes widened when he looked up at the person, which had my mind screaming in alarm until I turned around and looked up into dark emerald eyes.

“Hia, Harry,” I said cheerfully, being completely happy now that I had a smoke and was given the chance to calm down.

“Where’s your hoodie?” he asked, and of course that would be the first thing he notices. Reaching down to the stair my feet were resting on, I pulled up the hoodie I had taken off a few minutes ago so it didn’t reek like smoke, and showed it to him. “You took it off in front of Blake?” he asked, eyes growing darker.

“Blake? Who the fuck?? No, I took it off in front of this kid so I could smoke,” I gestured towards the kid I had been sitting with, then the light bulb went off and I turned to look at him. “Oh, you’re Blake,” I said, realization dawning on me and making me feel like a complete idiot when he nodded and offered a shy smile. “Idiot of the year award goes to me,” I mumble under my breath, shaking my head at how stupid I was.

I looked up at Harry with sad orbs, and watched as his eyes began to melt and turn into an emerald pool that began to pull me in with their beautiful tides. “Come here,” he said softly, offering me his hand to help me up. I slotted my small hand in his and ignored how perfectly it fit in place, then let him pull me up into a standing position. 

I flicked my cigarette in a random direction, then turned my head and smiled at him. I stood there, watching him, not knowing what I was expecting but the soft kiss on my forehead was not it. “Lift up your arms and I’ll help you put it on,” Harry whispered, his smooth lips still pressed against my forehead.

Nodding my head, I lifted my hands up, only to bring them back down and wrap them around his waist. “I think I’m fine not wearing it,” I said, and for once, I wasn’t lying. As long as I was next to Harry, I knew I would be fine. I wouldn’t feel like the house was closing in on me or that everybody was watching me. I would be okay.

Pulling back with furrowed eyebrows and his bottom lip between his teeth, Harry stared at me long and hard, then he inhaled deeply and nodded. “Alright, then let’s go,” he took my hand once again and pulled me into his side, then wrapped his arm around my side and led me up the stairs.

Just as he was opening the door, I turned back and smiled at Blake, who was staring up at the sky. “It was nice to meet you,” I said, simply smiling when he smiled at me. He gave me a slight incline of his head, then he turned back to look at the moon, his cigarette still held between his fingers.

I was glad Harry didn’t get upset about me running off and hanging out with his cousin, but I was even happier that he didn’t read too much into me taking off my hoodie. I simply took it off because I didn’t want it to smell like smoke, and not for any other reason.

People were chatting loudly in the kitchen, which was the room we walked into through the backyard. Everybody turned to look at us, then they went back to their own conversations and left us alone so we could walk through the kitchen and into the dining room. People were in here too, which was expected. Dinner would be ready soon, based on the delicious aroma that fills the entire house.

I kept my head bowed and set down in the chair Harry pulled out for me at the large table. He set down next to me, and when I peaked up, I first noticed his hand that was palm up on the table, inviting me to lace my fingers with his, then I noticed Anne and Robin sitting across from us, Anne casting a few smiles in my direction every few minutes.

When more and more people began to file into the room and the noise began to grow louder and louder, I felt my back grow stiffer and stiffer. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t sit in here with all these people and eat without having some sort of panic attack. I was vulnerable right now, sitting like this out in the open with no hoodie on. I knew this night would end in flames if I didn’t--

A hand lying on top of mine that was on my thigh instantly silenced my thoughts. The fingers were long and rough, but soft, and their palm was rugged from all the scars they have got throughout the years. This hand, while unperfect to most, was completely perfect to me. Sighing deeply through my nose, I flipped my hand over and laced my fingers with his, feeling his rings dig into the soft parts on the inside of my fingers, but I didn’t mind it.

I looked up at him, only to see he wasn’t looking at me. He was in a conversation with Anne and two other women I didn’t know, and with the topic they were talking about (something about a lake or something) they had been talking for a while, meaning Harry couldn’t have known I was freaking out.

_ But he knows you. _

Ah, yes, he does. He knows me and my stupid attacks and the way I think. Pulling at loose strings on my pants, I looked to my right and smiled widely when I seen Gemma. “Thank god you’re sitting by me,” I breathed in relief, my arm hooking with hers.

In the past few weeks, me and Gemma have become close. Well, close in the sense that me and another girl could be close. She reminded me of my sister, but she was a healthier, nicer version. She was sweet and loved most of the topics I liked, so we got along fine.

“Of course! Do you honestly think i’d leave you alone with nobody but Caveman,” she gestured towards Harry, but I had known who she was talking about, “to protect you from my ridiculously loud and obnoxious family?” she laughed, then leaned in a little bit and got this serious look on her face before whispering. “Besides, Grandmum has bad gas,” a look of disgust crossed over her face before both of us began to laugh, loudly, but not loud enough to draw anyones attention.

“Then you picked the wrong people to sit by. I bet your brothers gas could knock out even your Grandmum,”

“Where do you think he inherited the stink genes from?”

I snorted at that, then quickly covered my mouth with my hand, but ended up laughing harder at how ridiculous my little snort sounded. “That was adorable!” Gemma exclaimed, tears trailing down her rosy cheeks, but surprisingly enough, her makeup stayed as perfect as it was before.

“Dinner’s beginning,” someone said, followed by a fork clanking against a glass and creating that nerve grinding high pitched, screeching like noise.

The urge to laugh was gone, and I sat up in my seat properly, my arm falling from Gemma’s. I kept my hand laced with Harry’s, and when he tried to pull it back, I just tightened my hold and shook my head, hoping he could see. The same guy who had announced it was time to eat began to prattle on and on about god and how he was thankful for everything he gave them, including this meal and yatta yatta.

It was boring listening to him,  but that didn't mean I hated God. I didn't have anything against him,  I just grew up questioning him and why he gave me the life he did. Me and him had a rocky relationship, but it was still a relationship.

It wasn’t until he said Amen that I realized this was a prayer, and I had my eyes opened and didn’t even participate in it. I blushed darkly and kept my head bowed, silently hoping that nobody noticed me.

And nobody did.

They all began to load their plates up and eat. A few dishes of food was passed to me, but I just handed it over to Harry, who would put a scoop on my plate, then on on his plate. This went on until I had some sort of meat (Chicken, maybe?), a roll, mashed potatoes, green beans, and some other vegetables on my plate. There was no way I would be able to eat all of this, but I decided I would at least try when I chanced a glance up and seen nobody was even focused on me, but rather their food.

I took a bite of the meat, only to get the urge to spit it out and wash my mouth out with soap or something. It was bitter and chewy, and the longer I chewed it, the more my stomach began to gargle, begging me to spit out the wretched thing in my mouth. And I wanted to, but I didn’t want to be rude.

_ Ah,  fuck it. _

With a mouth full of the meat, I poked Harry’s side with my finger and waited until he turned to me before I pointed to my puffed out cheeks. He rolled his eyes, grabbed a napkin off of the table, leaned close so nobody could see what he was doing, and let me spit it out in his hand before he rolled it up and set it on the table, but underneath his plate so nobody could see it.

_ See,  he knows me so well. _

“What was that?” I asked him, the bitterness from that nasty shit still in my mouth even after I took a drink of my water.

“Chicken liver,” he mumbled, grinning knowingly at me before he began to eat his own food.

I glared at the back of his head, and rather than continuing to eat, I leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms over my chest.  _ No more food for me. _

The minutes seemed to drag on as everybody continued eating, and I was tempted to ask Harry if I could excuse myself before the conversation at the table was turned to Harry. “Remember when he used to be your trouble child, Anne? I would get a call from you every night about how Harry had gotten into a fight, or how you could hear him in the room with one of his new  _ friends.”  _ the woman with brown haired pulled up in a bun said, her features resembling Anne and I instantly recognized her as her sister.

I felt my stomach drop at her words, and my fingers being crushed by Harry’s tightening grip, but I was more focused on Anne who was blushing a cherry red tomato color. “Oh, stop it, Claire. That was in the past,” Anne said, looking both embarrassed, but pissed. She shot her sister a warning glance that I even cowered back at, but her sister didn’t budge.

“Or that time that Harry slept with his one teacher, what was his name? I can’t remember, but I remembered you calling me and saying how much you wished your son would just grow up,” Claire smirked at Anne when she seen her sister looked like a deer caught in headlights. “But my all time favorite is when you called me in tears to tell me how your son had landed himself in jail after getting in a fist fight with the principle, and a few of the male staff members, over a test he cheated on,” pausing,  she shook her head and sighed,  “Oh, Harry. We all wondered when you would ever  _ grow up,” _

Everybody was silent now, not one person here knowing what to say or do after that. I could hear Harry’s heavy breathing, and I thought he was about to beat the shit out of someone here, preferably Claire, but all he did was stand up from his seat and storm out of the room. Everyone, including me, sat there stunned, watching as he disappeared through the door. We heard a loud crashing noise coming from somewhere outside, but nobody jumped,  not even me.

I sat staring at the door,  waiting for Harry to return,  but he didn't. “Damn it,  Claire. Why can't you ever leave the boy alone?” Anne shouted, smoke practically shooting out of her ears.

What the hell was this woman talking about anyway? Harry has told me a few of those stories,  but he never mentioned he had went to jail or that he had slept with his teacher.

Even though my anger at Harry began to grow,  I was beyond angry at this lady. Who the fuck does she think she is? I could feel all the hatred that was brewing in my stomach begin to multiply,  until my face was red and hot and my body was shaking.

“Claire,  was it?” I asked,  my voice quiet but everyone heard me,  and they all turned their attention on me. “Do you enjoy making your nephew feel like shit over his past?  I mean,  I'm sure it's a boost to your ego,  which seems to be deflating based on the press on nails you have and the hair dye that's staining your cheek. You wanted to impress your family,  didn't you?  And when you realized that all attention was being turned away from you,  you had to throw Harry in the spotlight so you could shine a little to,  yeah?”

I didn't know what was coming out of my mouth,  but it felt good to say,  so I continued,  regrettably,  “I'm sure you wouldn't like your family bringing up your past. Anne told me about the time you had to have your stomach pumped after chugging down a bottle of vodka and sucking fifteen different dicks,”

“Stop it!  That's in the past!”

Gasping, I covered my hand with my mouth. “Kind of like every story you just said was from the past,”  shaking my head at her,  I pushed my chair into the table and took a step back. “Grow the fuck up already,  Claire. You don’t have a dick, so stop trying to make up for what you’re lacking with your personality,”

I watched her face fall, and that was all the satisfaction I needed before I turned around and followed after Harry. I was breathing erratically, my heart hammering against my chest and I felt like the house was going to swallow me whole, or that my heart was going to explode. Whatever the feeling was, it wasn’t good, and it didn’t last for long.

When I burst through the backdoor and took a deep breath of the fresh, crisp air, my breathing began to return to normal, but my heart was still beating out of control. I needed to find Harry. I was worried he would do something to harm someone around here, or even himself.

Swallowing back every emotion I was feeling, I willed my unsteady body to go forward, my footsteps uneven and my world wobbly, but I could do this. I would find him, even without my glasses. I had to squint my eyes to see a foot in front of me, and even then it was blurry. It would be impossible for me to see anything that wasn’t in front of my fucking face, so I stopped walking, stood up straight, held my breath and kept as still as I could.

_ I would listen. _

Past the crickets chirping happily in the distance, and the branched scraping against each other from the soft sways of the trees, I could hear something. Someone was mumbling stuff under their breath, words I wasn’t able to make out, but could still hear. My feet began to move, and before I could open my eyes, I was already following their muffled voice.

I walked to the fence, then walked along it and stopped when their voice stopped as well. It became silent once again, something I once craved, but now it was torture. I could hear the blood rushing from my heart and out into my body, and I could hear the occasional grumble of my stomach, but I couldn’t hear them anymore.

I thought I was along. That the person had heard me and ran away, until something emerged from the darkness of the trees and pulled me into the shadows. “What are you doing out here?” an angry whisper that had me shrinking back, I whimpered quietly and moved back a little so I was flush against the fence and now trapped.

“I wanted to make sure you were okay,”  _ Please don’t be mad at me. I just want you to be okay. _

“I’m fine. Go back inside,” a terse command that had my body shaking, but I don’t think it was in fear. I wasn’t scared of Harry, per se, but I was scared of what he would do to other people, or even the harmless fence behind me.

“No, talk to me,”  _ Talk to me, please. Don’t push me away.  _ Taking a chance, that could possibly be the worst mistake of my life, I turned my head up, my eyes focused on the shape of Harry’s face, and brought my hands to his cheeks. I could feel his jaw ticking beneath my fingers, and I could feel when his body tensed at the contact, but he didn’t move or brush me away. “Don’t let her get to you,”

He laughed humorlessly, the sound bouncing around the small space between us and rattling inside my head. “Like I give a fuck what she says,” he moved his hands away and took a step back, only to lean against the side of the neighbors house. “Even if I did give a fuck about her or her meaningless words, all she was doing was speaking the truth,” he laughed it off like it meant nothing, but I could hear the sadness in his voice.

“Truth that you didn’t want brought up again,” I reminded him, taking a step closer so I could see him again. “What she said may have been the truth, but who is she to think she can tell everybody about your past? If you wanted them to know of your… Adventures? Then you could have told them yourself. She was only trying to humiliate you, but I think it was her who got humiliated in the end,”

I seen his head snap up at my words, meaning I had caught his attention. “How the fuck was she humiliated?”

I smiled softly, glad that he was at least talking to me now. “I may have said a few words,” I said quietly, my head bowing. “Mean words,” I added, my childish side peeking out.

“Like,”

“I may have called her a dick and more or less told her she was an attention whore,” heat flooded my cheeks, and I gulped audibly when Harry took a step towards me. I thought he was going to yell at me, or even trap me in the corner so he could scare me, but then I felt his fingers under my chin, slowly pushing my head up.

We didn’t say anything, he just stared down at me and I stared up at him. I didn’t flinch, or look away, or even move. I waited patiently.

He brought his hand up to my cheek, his fingers tugging and twirling the short pieces of hair at the nape of my neck, and I melted into his body. This was the Harry I liked, not the asshole who was just trying to scare me so I would leave him alone.

I stood up on my tippy toes and buried my head in the crook of his neck, my lips running along the skin stretching over his collarbone in silent apology. I was apologizing for nothing I did, but everything else. His smooth was skin and felt nice on my skin and god he smelt nice and I… “You were mean to me,” I said, trying to save myself from my straying thoughts.

“I have to be,”

Brows knitted, I leaned back, my fingers subconsciously stroking his jaw. “What does that mean?”

“It means I have to be. I have to be careful not to get too close because then I will hurt you so severely you will have to leave me. And I can’t let that happen. I haven’t had you long enough. It’s selfish of me to act like such an asshole so I don’t end up hurting you, but I can’t hurt you,”

“Your words don’t hurt me, you fool. What hurts me is when you push me away and ice me out, or does that not mean anything?” my hand slid down his body and I grasped his arm, my fingers curling around them but they weren’t long enough to touch.

“Of course it does. I.. I just don’t know how to let me feel the way I am. I want you Louis, more than I have ever wanted anything, but I’m afraid that if I give in and let myself have you, you will end up getting hurt by me, and I know that will hurt you more at the end of the day,”

“Hardly,” I rebuked, my fingernails biting into his skin. “You can’t make that choice for me. You don’t know how I feel. That is my choice to make,”

I could see the war brewing in his eyes, his better judgement fighting with his inner desire. It was a short battle, but when his eyes softened and his jaw became slack, I knew which had won. “I know you more than you think,” it was a solemn answer, one that had my heart clenching at my eyes watering.

“You can’t possibly know what I want right now,” the cracks in my voice showed the way I felt, betraying me and my want to stay strong and emotionless.

I stared in bottomless pools heated with stubborn flare. He wasn’t backing down, but neither was I. Beneath his scrutinizing stare, I stood bold, my gaze never wavering even with tears glossing over my blue orbs.

“What do you want?”  _ Finally he questions me, asks me what I want even though he knows he won’t take it into consideration. He’ll just chew on the information before he spits it out and makes the decision on his own, the decision I am supposed to make. _

“I want you  _ to want me,” _ I would give anything I had if it means Harry would want me, forever and always.

“That’s the problem, isn’t it? I want you, but I can’t have you without ruining you,” his voice was painfully quiet, his words a whisper in the void around us.

“I would happily be a beautiful disaster made by your hands if it means I get to stay with you, and that you will want me. We could stay in our own little chaotic world, and be happy together,” it was a hopeful whisper, but I knew it was nothing more than a fantasy that would be short lived in my head.

“Would you still want to stay with me, even when I let you inside my head and you get to see the way my fucked up brain ticks?”

“I will stay with you no matter what. In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve already stayed and i’ve seen more of you than anyone else had, you donk,” tears clouded my vision, but they didn’t fall. I wasn’t giving them the chance to.

Now, Harry shrinks back into the shadows; and vicious waves are crashing into my ribcage with the hurt look Harry tries so hard to hide. “Why?” now his voice is small, “Why do you want me?”

With my shaking body and wobbly knees, I took a step towards him, my hand cupping his face. I tried to smooth out his eyebrows, but they just furrowed even more and his eyes became clouded as he got lost deeper and deeper in thought. “I don’t want you, I need you. I need you like the earth needs the sun. Without you, my life would be dark and gloomy and I would survive for mere days before everything turned to shit,” I tried to sound sincere, but my damn voice cracked again and tears began to burn my cheeks as they fell.  _ Blood traitors. _

He looked unsure, but he nuzzled his face into my hand and my body erupted with hope. That was something, or at least it was more than I expected. “You’re too good for this world, Louis Tomlinson,”  _ and the way he says my name makes me feel so loved. It sounds like a pleased whisper, like he just discovered water for the first time and he was just now quenching his thirst. _

We breathed in sync for a second, then two, then three, then, “Now kiss me, you fool,” and he did. Lips, bitten raw, but soft, were pressed against mine and I forgot everything that just happened for a split second and I was in my own little world full of fireworks. Everything was right in the world, right then and there, and I couldn’t care less what inside that house looks like right now, or what will happen to me when I go back in there. All I care about is here and now, and everything seems to be going just as planned.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been so long since I have updated! I am so sorry! I ended up getting really bad writers block and haven't been able to write much lately, but thanks to a miracle, I bring you this chapter. It is all over the place and very unedited, but I promise I will make it up to y'all next chapter. Thank you so much for reading my story so far, and I can't wait to hear your thoughts on this chapter!
> 
> Xoxo

_ I stood in front of him, drinking in his masculine scent and the heavy stench of cigarettes that clung to my clothes. There was a new feeling there, in the pit of my stomach, that began to form the longer I stared into his fiery emerald eyes that stared at me with such an intensity that I thought my skin was going to burst into flames. “What is it, H?” I asked, my thumb stroking the edge of his jaw lightly. I curved my hand and brought my thumb up so I was able to reach his lips, the pad dragging against his wet bottom lip. _

_ He shook his head, gently enough so my hand didn’t budge, and moved his hand so it covered the back of mine. “I’m just trying to figure out what I did to make me lucky enough to get you,” he said, a v forming between his eyebrows when he seen my bottom lip wobble. “Hey, don’t get sad or whatever. I like having you around. That’s what I meant to say. I didn’t mean for it to sound sarcastic,” _

_ I shook my head, giggling as I stood up on my tippy toes and buried my head in the crook of his neck. “I love you,” I whispered, my lips dragging against his pulsepoint, which was thumping wildly against my chapped lips. I didn’t realize what I had said until a few beats of silence passed, followed by Harry going stiff beneath me. _

_ “I-I didn’t.. Harry,” I watched helplessly as he pulled back from me and took a few steps away from me, putting distance between us. I didn’t know why I said those three words. I hadn’t even thought about if I loved him or not until just barely. I mean, did I love him? Almost instantly I got this feeling in my stomach and my worst fear was being confirmed. _

_ I loved someone. _

_ “What did you say?” he sounded so cold, his voice sending a tingle of fear down my spine. He sounded so different than he did just five seconds ago when he was telling me he was lucky to have me. _

_ “I didn’t mean to tell you this way,” I whispered, the tears clouding my vision because I knew what was going to happen next. Harry wasn’t the type of person that like to hear those words, and I knew it. He was the kind that didn’t show much affection to anyone, not even his own family. I was the lucky one from the batch that actually got to see the real Harry, and feel all the affection he had to offer. But I had to go and ruin it all by confessing my love for him that I didn’t even know existed until a few stupid seconds ago. _

_ “But it’s true,” he shook his head and tore his hateful gaze away from me. “I fucking knew this would happen. I shouldn’t have even let this,” gesturing between the two of us without even looking at me, he continued, “go on for as long as it has,” he sneered, in obvious disgust that someone like me loved him. _

_ “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen,” the tears began to roll down my cheeks, first starting out as small ones but soon turning into the ugly fat ones. How could I have done this? How could I have been stupid enough to say that out loud? _

_ “Yeah, and I didn’t mean for this to turn into anything but a quick fuck,” nothing more than a quick fuck? Was that all I was to him, and have been? _

_ I couldn’t breath. I wanted to claw at my throat to try and get some breath into my lungs. This wasn’t my Harry. This wasn’t the boy admitting to me ten minutes ago that he wanted me. A dark, sinister laugh bubbled up his throat and when he finally looked at me, with those dead eyes that looked at him with an intensity that I had felt it all over my body the last time they stared into mine, I knew I had fucked up and I no longer had him, in any sort of way. _

_ I had lost him, and I couldn’t do anything about it but scream at him, “You said you wanted me!  You said that you were lucky to have me!  How could you act so cold now?” _

_ “Oh, Louis, stop it. Nobody loves you and nobody ever will. Get that through your fucking skull, then come back to me when you're ready to fuck again, “ _

_ Nobody loved me. He was right.  _

_ Nobody loved me!!! _

_ Nobody…  _

I bolted upright, the blankets falling down and pooling on my hips. With frantic eyes I searched the room I was in, taking comfort in the familiarity and the fact that I was in Harry's room.

It was all a dream. 

Relief washed over my body and wrapped around me like a warm, comforting blanket. I didn't actually tell him I loved him. None of it actually happened, and Harry wasn’t leaving me. With my eyelids still heavy, I sighed deeply and laid back down, my body forming to the bed. I could feel as my body began to grow relaxed again, and I was on the verge of falling asleep, but then that voice rang through my head.

_ Nobody loves you! _

Needing to get my mind off of it, and figuring that I wasn’t going to be able to go back to bed, I rolled over onto my side and extended my arm, searching for the warmth of Harry’s body… Only to find… Nothing.

Cracking one eye open, to make sure that maybe I was wrong and he had just moved closer to the edge, but he was gone. And in his place, well close to where his place was, was a pile of clothes.

_ What the fuck? _

Sitting up, I began to rub the sleepiness out of my eyes and looked around the room. Clothes, on top of clothes, on top of shoes, covered the entire floor and I wasn’t sure how I had missed this mess before.

“Harry?” I shouted, yawning as soon as my mouth opened.

I heard a loud ‘bang’ coming from the bathroom, the noise startling me.  _ What the hell was that? _ Standing on unsteady feet, I drug my feet as I walked into the bathroom. The floor in there was at least clean enough that you could see the floor, but over by Harry’s closet doors there was a giant pile of clothes.

_ How much clothes did one person honestly need? _

“Harry?” I yelled again, my feet sliding across the cool tile floor as I quietly made my way to the closet, not knowing what I was going to find there. There could be a burglar for all I know. A burglar that has very poor taste in clothes, that is, because all the clothes they have thrown out probably costs more than my entire block would.

“What are you doing?” I asked the practically naked teen that had clothes piled on his lap. He set in the middle of his closet, his hands searching through the clothes that surrounded him. Not one pair of pants, or shirt, was hung up on the  hangers in his closet. The hangers were there, they were just empty.

Giving no indication that he heard me, Harry picked up a green button up shirt he found on the floor and stared at it long and hard for a few seconds before he nodded, huffed, and threw it over his shoulder. Apparently pleased with what he found.

“Desm-- my father called today and asked if I would meet with him at his office,” Harry finally said, all the clothes falling from his lap when he stood up and looked at me.

“But, you have school today,”  _ And we have to help set up for prom. _

Shaking his head, Harry grabbed a pair of jeans off the ground. They were blue skinny jeans, but unlike his usual black ones, they didn’t have rips in the knees or anywhere else on the material. “I’m not going today.”

Poking the inside of my cheek with my tongue, I nodded and took a step back. Fine, he wasn’t going to school. That’s fine. I’ll go by myself and help with the prom decorations myself. “Alright, fine. I’m going to take a shower,”

Waving a dismissal hand at me, Harry went back to looking through his closet. 

_ Yay me. My boyfriend is practically ignoring me AND not going to school with me, and i’m still not sure I forgive him for breaking up with me, even if it was only a dream. _

_ **** _

After a quick shower, and lots of thinking, I got dressed for school with a clearer mind. Harry wasn’t ignoring me, he was simply nervous about meeting with his father. He wasn’t not going to school with me to hurt me, but because he knew his father wouldn’t take no for an answer and that he would have to go to meet him either way. And Harry himself didn’t break up with me. It was his cruel dream self that did, and that I hated. Not him.

“Ready?” Harry asked me as I did the final loop on my shoe.

Straightening up, I grabbed my book bag off of his dresser, along with my math book, and looked over at him, my mouth popping open and drool instantly running down my chin. 

He looked  _ hot. _

He had on the mint green button up shirt, along with the pair of blue skinny jeans, and brown high heeled boots that were ankle length. His curls were loose and framing his face, and sitting on the bridge of his nose was a pair of black sunglasses.

“I’m hot… I mean I-I’m ready,”I stumbled over my words, having problems coming up with a full sentence that wouldn’t make me look like a drooling, bumbling fool. 

Beaming brightly, Harry took my book bag from me and walked in front of me, intentionally swaying his small hips. His ass may not be the biggest, but it definitely was nice, remarkably so in those jeans.

After fighting off my raging hormones during my ride to school, Harry dropped me off at the front doors and with a kiss goodbye, he pulled out of the parking lot and left me alone.

It felt weird having him drop me off like this. When I got a ride from him, he was always with me when we got out of the car. But not today.

Out of all the days in the world, it had to be the day I was feeling the most uncertain about our relationship.

****

I stared blankly at the whiteboard in my fourth period class. The teacher was standing at the front of the class, giving instructions on what out assignment was and when it was due, but I couldn’t make myself pay attention. All day my mind has been cloudy and I haven’t been able to focus on anything.

I wasn’t too worried about missing anything though, because I was at least a week ahead in each one of my classes. I liked doing all the work ahead so that I wasn’t like those kids who crammed an entire assignment into one night's work and wondered why they get half the credit the next day.

The pencil I held in my hand was, unintentionally, tapping a beat to the one song I had heard Harry singing in the kitchen one day. It was off beat and didn’t sound as good, but the song always calmed me. It had turned into the song Harry sings to me at night, mostly. His voice is so soothing, so calm with just the right amount of raspiness.

God, I missed his voice. It’s been too long since I’ve last heard him speak.

“This one?”  _ Harry. _

I shook my head and looked around me. Nobody else seemed to have heard the voice. God, I was pathetic. I missed him so much that I was starting to imagine his voice. “The one with the white poster?”

Okay, now I know I’m not imagining the voice. I couldn’t be. If I was, he would have said something completely different.

_ Silence. _

_ Maybe I was imagining it. _

Shaking my head, I looked at the front of the class just as the door was being thrown open, the hinges whining in protest. “Jen needs Louis,” the student said, my mind catching up a few seconds after I was already standing up from my seat.

“Harry?” He shook his head at me and gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I grabbed my things as quickly as I could and ran out the door, after getting the teacher's approval. “What are you doing here?” I asked him, trying to keep up with his pace as we ran side by side down the empty hallway.

“Jen has already excused all of your classes,” he said, instead of answering my questions.

“Why?” I wheezed out. My stomach was starting to hurt and my lungs and legs were screaming in protest. I wasn’t used to physical exercise. 

“Because, I need you,” my heart swelled in my chest, and when we came to a screeching halt at the front doors, Harry rubbed the back of his neck and my heart stopped swelling.

“No.”

“Please. I have to go to lunch with him and I don’t want to be alone with him,” his eyes were pleading, something that was rare for Harry to do.

Going against the uneasy feeling I had in my stomach, and the voice screaming at me in my head to turn now and run away, I grabbed his hand in mine and forced a smile. “Let’s go,”

*******

After coming to Harry’s rescue, which is how I liked to look at it, I was wishing he would come to my rescue and include me in the conversation. I have been sitting here, staring at a piece of pie for ten minutes and I have yet to be included in their conversation. From the parts I have listened to, I doubt I would know how to respond, but it would be nice to have someone to talk to besides a piece of pie that already has a bite taken out of it.

But what do I do? What do I say? I haven’t exactly been the most social person, so does one sit and wait to be included, or do they butt in and include themselves? 

Sighing, I picked my fork up off the table and looked up at Harry and his father, and before I could stop myself from saying anything, I blurted “I love this pie.” Almost instantly a big neon sign began to flash  **LOSER** over my head in big, bold letters.

I felt like melting into a pool of nothing when I looked up and seen the two men were staring at me. Harry in a way that looked amused, but also kinda grateful, and Desmond in a way that could be taken in two different ways. He was either not a fan of pie, and didn’t know why I brought it up, or he was trying to digest the fact that I, Louis Tomlinson, was the boy who seemed to have snatched his son away and make him committed to something for once in his life.

The knot in my stomach was going with the latter.

Why the hell would I do this? And why did I think that was a good conversation starter? You don’t have to be very social to know that pie is not a good conversation starter, especially when the other two people look all serious and business tip. 

Slamming my lips shut, I bowed my head and began to jab my fork into the pie that was apparently so good, that I needed to bring it up. Pie has never failed me until this day.

“So Louis, from what I gather, you do quite well in school?” 

Ugh, so I get stared at like a freak when I bring up pie, but Desmond can bring up school? This is one of the examples people use when they tell you life isn’t fair. 

“I do alright. I manage to maintain a 4.2 grade point average while tutoring students during the day and sometimes weekends,” I said, my eyes never leaving my pie that was now cleared of whip cream. “Well, I used to tutor students on weekends,” I added quietly, as more of an afterthought.

“Are you in any honors classes? And have you thought about any colleges. A boy your age needs to start thinking about colleges to attend,” he began the speech that I have heard about fifty times before. Rolling my eyes, and knowing there was more to come, I set up in my seat and looked at Desmond. “Now, I know you still have another year before you have to worry about graduating, but it’s never to early to…” he began to ramble on and on about how you should have at least three colleges you want to go to, and a few back up colleges if you don’t get into the other ones, but I stopped paying attention when my eyes somehow moved over to Harry.

He wasn’t watching me, nor was he watching his father. He was slumped down in his chair, his elbow on the table and his chin in his palm. His pointer finger and middle finger were pressed against his cheek, the tips disappearing in the mess of curls, and his index finger and pinky finger were curled down by his chin, the tips passing his chin by a few inches. His thumb was placed beneath his jaw, where it continued to tap against the skin.

And while he looked bored to any other person here, he looked sad to me. I have learned to read Harry, and the sparkle in his eyes were gone and his face was blank. He didn’t acknowledge his rambling father or his boyfriend sitting across the table, worried about him, he simply sat put and stared at the middle of the table.

I was wondering what he was thinking about. What was making his eyebrows furrow and his teeth drag across his bottom lip. I was worried, and I knew I shouldn’t be worried about him, but something was telling me he wasn’t alright.

Harry has told me before that his mind ticked differently than others did, so for all I know he could be thinking about his cookie that I ate last night, the last one in his box that he had hidden under his bed, or the fact that his father was talking about college.

College! Oh my god. How could I have not realized this before?

Harry hated talking about school. Everytime I bring it up, he always shuts down or shuts me out, so I’ve learned to not talk about it around him. I don’t know why he acts the way when school is brought up, nor have I cared. Until today.

Making a mental note to ask him later, no matter the repercussions, I turn my attention back to Desmond and sigh quietly when I seen he was writing something down in his book, which was most likely a list of colleges he thought would be good for me, while he still jabbered on and on.

“Here you are,” sliding the paper across to me, I smiled gratefully at him and glanced down at it for a second, already having an idea what was sprawled across it, then folded it and put it in my pocket.

“Thank you,” I said, not intending to use the paper because I was sure half, if not all, of the colleges on there were ones that were out of my league or ones that I was already looking at. 

His lips barely upturning, he leaned back in his chair and undid a button on his suit jacket, then opened it, revealing a white button up shirt. “Now, as I was saying before, what classes are you taking right now?”

“Um, all honors. For this year, I will continue with my honor classes and tutoring students, but first thing next year I will be taking the ap exam to see if I qualify to take ap courses. My advisor, Jen Black--the woman you met Harry’s first day, is absolutely certain I will receive a three, if not a four, but I guess we won’t truly know until I actually take the exam,” pausing, I glanced at Harry and seen he still wasn’t paying attention. He looked as uninterested as he had in Nicole the other day when she flashed him her boobs in the hallway. “But enough about college classes and school. Has Harry told you prom is in two days?” I asked, knowing I could babble on and on about college courses and ap courses for a while, but deciding I would end it now so I didn’t make Harry suffer any longer. Besides, I was excited about prom and honestly couldn’t wait to go.

At this, Harry snapped out of gazing and looked up at me, a smile stretching his lips and the same sparkle returning to his eyes. Well, at least I thought it was his usual sparkle at first, but then he waggled his eyebrows and my face flushed of all color.

He was thinking about the first time we had sex.

“Stop,” I mouthed at him, my eyes darting over to his father. Harry simply shrugged, licked his lips, let his eyes glance over my body in one swift motion, then mouthed “Later,” at me and grinned.

Breathing shallowly, I tried thinking of anything besides Harry’s hands grasping my hips and his tongue flicking over the tip of my head, but the harder I tried to think of anything else, the more vivid it became. I could feel his hands on my body, and I could feel as he moved in and-- “Are you alright, Louis? You look awfully pale. Do you need a drink of water?” without giving me a chance to shake away the embarrassment and answer him, Desmond began to snap his fingers and order anyone that was listening to bring us a cup of water.

“I-I’m fine,” I stutter out, squirming in my chair when I felt my pants had become too tight.

“You sure, Lou? Des is right, you look sick. Perhaps you need something else to…” stopping mid sentence, Harry bit down on his bottom lip and his eyes became dark and stormy, “make you feel better.” Desmond agreed with Harry, completely oblivious to what his son's intentions actually were.

“No. I’m f-fine. I-It just g-got a little hot in here,” I whispered, my throat bone dry. I could feel as a bead of sweat began to roll from my hairline, and down towards my eyes. Lifting my trembling hand, I wiped it away and gave Harry a dirty look, even though it was a waste of my time.

To add to my humiliation, a small waiter scurried over to my side of the table, seen what was hiding between my legs, blushed, handed me the glass of water and scurried back towards the kitchen doors. “On second thought, I think i’ve come down with something. I need to go home, and Harry is my only ride,” speaking slowly, and unintentionally emphasising every word, I gave Harry a look, which he understood, and scooted my chair back.

“Oh, well, alright. I hope you get feeling better. And Harry, we need to do this again. I’ll have my secretary find a day i’m not busy and i’ll give you a call.” Desmond said, nodding his head at both of us. While he began to pay for the meal, after refusing Harry’s offer to help, I stood up from my seat and was grateful when Harry rushed over to me and pulled me against his side.

My semi-hard on was smashed against his leg, and even though I was in nearly unbearable pain, my face gave nothing away. I was biting the inside of my lips hard enough it drew blood, of course, but still that was better than the humiliation of walking out of here with a noticeable stiffy.

“We’ll see you, father,” Harry said, this being the first time I have heard him call Des father, before he spun us around and escorted us out of the way too fancy diner.

“It was taking every fucking ounce of self control for me not to jump across that table and fuck you there,” Harry growled in my ear the moment we walked through the doors, not even giving me the chance to breath in the fresh air and enjoy the way it cooled down my clammy skin.

“Not here, Harry,” was all I managed between my clenched teeth. That being enough for him, he wrapped his arm around my waist and hefted me up a little so my feet were no longer touching the ground, and began to practically sprint towards the car.

~~~~

Third person POV:

Louis set in Harry’s lap, his lips connected to the brown haired teens collarbone. His teeth were clamped around the smooth skin as he sucked, harder and harder until Harry cried out in pain, forcing him to move to a new area of untouched skin.

His ass was pressed against the bottom of the steering wheel, barely missing the horn, but even from there he felt the prominent bulge in Harry’s trousers that the older teen continued to rub against the crack of his ass. He was taunting him, telling him no every time he went to unzip his zipper, and Louis was starting to get frustrated until he finally took control.

“Move an inch or say anything, Styles, and you’ll have blue balls for the rest of the year,” Louis growled loudly, his teeth nipping at Harry’s earlobe before he leaned back and began to clumsily undo Harry’s zipper. 

Having no idea what had gotten into him, or what he was doing for that matter, Louis pushed through his shyness and lack of knowledge, and did what felt right. He pulled open Harry’s pants, stuck his hand underneath the elastic band of his boxers, and wrapped his small hand around Harry’s large, throbbing penis and gave it a soft squeeze.

Harry moaned instantly at the contact. He threw his head back against his seat and balled his hands into fists, trying to fight off the urge to take control and slam Louis down on his penis. 

“My god,” Louis panted, managing to forget the size in the short time since he last seen it. Shaking his head to clear his mind, Louis focused once again and pulled Harry’s cock free from his constricting underwear, his eyes going wide and round when it came into sight.

It was swollen and the tip was red and looked angry as tiny white droplets of precum leaked from the slit in his penis. He wanted to lean down and wrap his lips around him, to taste him and see if he still tasted the same, but a hand sneaking down his pants caught his attention. “What did I tell you?” he snarled, his fingernails digging into the fleshy part of Harry’s forearm.

“I’m going to start to stretch you,” Harry murmured, voice low and husky and only driving Louis even insaner.

Knowing this would get him to what he wanted faster, Louis nodded his head and bit his lip, a shiver running down his spin when he felt the blunt tip of Harry’s finger circling around his puckered hole.

He knew what was coming, remembered how it felt the last time Harry had done this, but that still didn’t prepare him for when Harry finally did shove his finger past the first ring of muscles. His body tensed and his ass scream in pain. Fire, hot and burning, twirled up and around his spin, then shot back down in electric jolts.

“Fuck,” Louis gasped in pain, his head falling against Harry’s shoulder. He didn’t know if he wanted to cry or to scream, or to even tell Harry to stop what he was doing, but he knew better, and knew that in only a few short minutes all this pain would disappear and he would feel exactly how he felt the first time him and Harry had sex.

Despite Louis’ mewls of protest and his occasional cries of pain, Harry kept going. He slowly pushed one finger in, and worked it around the tiny space before he added another, and in no time at all, he added another. With his third finger in and stretching Louis’ still too tight hole, Harry felt as the boy above him began to squirm and press back more, showing that the pain was no longer a problem and that he was ready.

Harry pulled his fingers out and, in one swift move, had Louis’ pants undone. “Listen little love, you’re going to have to switch to the other seat for a second so you can take off your pants,” Harry said, his voice low and soft, making his words sound like part of a lullaby.

Louis didn’t protest or whine. He climbed over into the other seat without a word and pulled off his pants and boxers, then when he was completely naked from the waist down, he looked over at Harry and grinned. “Do you have a saddle? Because i’m about to ride you,” Louis said, laughing like a maniac as he climbed over the center console and threw his leg over Harry, making it so he was straddling him again.

His penis, though smaller than Harry’s, was thicker and stood just as proud. He would have been self conscious being naked around someone and having their penis be about three inches longer, but when it came to Harry’s penis, it was much larger than the average one -and Louis knows, because he googled it- So, though smaller, it was still a respectable size and could get the job done.

Gripping Harry’s shoulders, Louis let the older teen line his penis up with his hole and, with clenched teeth and his eyes screwed shut, Louis began to lower himself onto Harry, ignoring the searing pain of being stretched beyond a comfortable limit, and only stopped to take a breath when he was sitting flat on Harry’s lap.

At the same time, as if in sync, Louis and Harry gasped in a deep, shaky breath and let their bodies relax. “When your dad calls, tell him thank you, because I have never been fuller,” Louis joked, trying to let his mind wander as he adjusted to the intrusion.

“Less talking about my dad,” Harry breathed out, “and more moving before your asshole crushes my dick,”

Taking no offence to what Harry had said, because he knew what the older teen actually meant, Louis nodded and pulled up, hissing as he did so, then slammed back down. This time, instead of pain, pleasure pricked up his spine and a small moan fell from his lips.

Needing to do something with his lips when he got ready to move again, Louis fastened his lips to Harry’s neck and began to mark the skin there. As he sucked the skin, and could feel as the blood vessels popped and began to color his skin, Louis pulled up and moved back down, this time in a testingly manner.

When he found that yet again, there was no more pain, he continued that little movement again, and again, and again, until he was a moaning, sweaty mess on top of Harry that was moving in a steady rhythm. “Would,” pause, moan, “you rather,” another moan as his fingernails scratch down the side of Harry’s arms, “I call you,” a cry of pleasure as Harry’s penis slams against his prostate, “daddy,” he finished with a breathy whisper, his sweaty forehead rubbing against the side of Harry’s jaw as he brought his head back.

Louis felt as Harry’s entire body shook from that simple word, so he whispered it again, and got the same response, only this time Harry growled loudly and gripped Louis’ hip tightly with one hand, then wrapped his arm around his waist and crushed their bodies together, making it so their chests were touching and Harry was deeper in Louis then he had been all day.

“Say that again and I won’t last another second,” Harry growled, warning the boy though it wasn’t very threatening.

Louis opened his eyes and came face to face with eyes no longer emerald green, but black from how blown his pupils were. And he didn’t know why, but his body reacted to that and he felt his penis, that was sandwiched between their bodies, spaz and he was nearing the edge of coming.

“Daddy,” it was a innocent whisper with dark intentions. Louis was seeing if Harry was going to be true to his word, to see if that single word really had as much of an effect on Harry as the older teen said it did. And, just like he was hoping and had been warned, he felt as Harry’s entire body tensed beneath his and felt as something hot began to shoot inside of him before it came leaking out and pooling on Harry’s thighs.

Because of the feeling, and the intensity of staring right in Harry’s eyes as he came, Louis fell over the edge and his entire world began to spiral down as he came. One minute, his body was burning with white hot pleasure, the next, everything was black.

~~~~

Louis sat in the passenger seat, his head resting against the glass window and his eyes closed as he tried to regain movement yet again. Ten minutes ago he was having the orgasm of his life, and he thought it felt pretty great, but the next thing he knew Harry was shaking him awake with a worried look on his face.

_ “Louis?  Jesus fucking.... God! You scared the shit out of me,” was the first thing he heard when his eyes snapped open. Everything around him seemed brighter, and the air in the car seemed thicker. _

_ Through the grogginess of just waking up, Louis heard Harry tell him to move, or to say something so he knew he was okay, but when the small boy opened his mouth to croak something, nothing came out. His throat was dry and his voice wasn't working at that moment, so he moved. _

_ At first he only stretched his arm, then he stretched his back and wiggled his hips, a ball of disappointment nestling it's way into his tummy when he no longer felt Harry inside of him. He felt empty, a feeling he was going to have to get used if he wanted to continue being with Harry. _

_ After Harry made sure Louis was fine and was aware of his surroundings, Harry helped him into the passenger seat and handed the boy a blanket from the backseat of the car, so he could cover up. With a few nervous glances at Louis, Harry started the car and began to drive in the direction of his house, glad that they had been parked on a road with no traffic. _

And so there Louis sat, confused, with his good, light mood swirling down the toilet the longer he thought about his dream. He hadn't thought about it all day. He had kept it locked away in his mind because he didn't want to feel the same heartbreak he had felt in his dream. It had been so realistic, that even now, he could feel his heart shattering in his chest every time he glanced at Harry.

He needed to do something, to save his mood from darkening, and even though he was naked and he was probably going to ruin their…. Amazing day, he wanted to ask Harry something. So, he did. “Harry, would you ever leave me?” his voice was quiet and had a scratch to it from his dry throat, but his words were clear and he knew Harry could hear him.

“Leave you? Why would I?  I'm quite content with you right now, and I don't think I'm going to be leaving you anytime soon. Why do you ask?”

“No reason,” slipping his bottom lip between his teeth, Louis debated on whether or not to ask him this next question. It was a hard decision, but ultimately, curiosity killed the cat, and satisfaction brought it back. “Do you think of me as anything more than a quick fuck?”

Silence stretched in the car. Louis was afraid Harry wasn't going to answer, and that his dream was true, until-- “You are more to me than a quick fuck. You are my boyfriend, the man I choose to sleep next to every night. If you were nothing but a quick fuck, I wouldn't put up with your habits of shoving your freezing feet in the middle of my back at night, or eating the last of my cookies. I would fuck you anytime, anywhere I'd like, then I'd leave you. There would be no sleepovers, no prom, no meals with my families, no late night chats. Just fucking. So, no, you are not just a quick fuck. You are so much more to me and I hope you realize that.”

He tried not to tear up, he really did, but the way Harry spoke with so much sincerity, and the way his voice dripped with an undefined promise, Louis couldn't stop the few tears that did slip past his eyes. “Do you ever think you'll love me?” His voice cracked, the noise squeezing Harry's heart tightly in an iron fist.

Unlike Louis expected, Harry smiled. He smiled his damned dimpled smile and stayed relaxed in his seat as he drove. He didn't tense up. He didn't yell at Louis or make him feel unwanted. He didn't do anything like his dream self did. And to add to the shock, he turned to Louis, locked eyes with him, and said,

“Loving you isn't as hard as you think it is. My mother loves you, Gemma loves you, and even Robin loves you. You seem to have this idea that the moment love is brought up around anyone, if it involves you, they will turn into some cold monster and tell you exactly what you fear. That you are unwanted, that you are unloved. But I promise you, Louis Tomlinson, you are wanted by me, and one day I will love you. It is inevitable. I just hope that when that day comes, you will believe me when I tell you that my heart, is yours,”

_ Harry Styles will love me one day. _

 


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is probably horrible, but I had fun writing it! The bottom half, of course. It is, once again, probably not the best, but I wanted to not only shine some light on Louis' and his mum's relationship because I felt I haven't for a while, but I wanted to bring Spencer forward. I don't know if many of you remember, but Spencer is Lou's second crazy older sibling, as it says in the summary. You will know more about him later, I just thought I would bring him up now.
> 
> Thank you to those of you who comment and vote for my story. I love getting on and seeing how any of you enjoy my story!!
> 
> Much love, Xx
> 
> WARNINGS: mentions of alcohol and drug abuse, physical abuse, and abandonment.

I sat in front of the dark haired woman, watching the way her dry hair swayed around her shoulders as she leaned forward to grab her cup of water; something I am still shocked over. 

Once she swallowed her small drink, she cleared her throat and leaned back in her chair, her dark brown eyes falling onto me. “I’m pregnant,”

After sitting in utter silence since I got here, I was so thrown back that she had actually talked that it took a moment, or two, for her words to sink in. Pregnant? “How the fuck could you be pregnant?” I hissed, grasping the edge of the table to keep myself from falling. The world began to sway around me, my eyes darting to every small thing in this room just so they wouldn’t focus on the woman across from me.

I had always thought that my mom got her tubes tied after she had me, and that's how she has remained unpregnant all this time. 

Narrowing her eyes at me like she was saying ‘you  _ know  _ how I got pregnant.’ I scoffed and shook my head. “Is that why you wanted me to come here in the middle of the night? So you could tell me that you were getting a fresh start at ruining another innocent child’s life?” I spat, saying things that came to my mind though I was able to keep… certain thoughts to myself.

Like; is this baby going to be addicted to drugs? Do you even know who the father is? How is this baby going to survive with  _ you  _ being it’s mother?

“I called you here so we could talk. Not so you could judge me, Louis,”

“No, mum,” sitting up straighter in my chair, I leaned forward, “you called me here in hopes I would feel pity for you and come back to help you raise this drug baby.” it was harsh, more so than I intended, but I can’t say I didn’t feel a little bit of satisfaction when I seen her flinch.

Covering her stomach with her hand, her thumb began to rub over the spot above her bellybutton and I watched as she breathed in and out, either trying to calm herself down so she didn’t do one of her famous flips outs, or she was acting like she was trying not to cry.

“I don’t need your help in raising the baby, Louis. The father is more than capable in helping me do so. I asked you to come here because I was wondering if you and that boyfriend of yours were still going good,”

Why the hell was she wondering about Harry? Biting back a few remarks about how I’m sure the father would be capable in raising a child when he wasn’t even capable enough to put on a condom, I raised an eyebrow and crossed my arms over my chest. “Why?”

Now it was her turn to be nervous. Her eyes darted around the room, finding interesting things in even the darkest of corners. “I am moving in with the father of the baby. He is a nice man and I think he will be good for me,” pausing, she inhaled deeply and finally looked at me, her mask she has been wearing all these years completely crumbling into nothing, and revealing a tired looking woman with sad, brown eyes. “You and Lottie are adults now. I have done nothing to help you guys turn into the amazing people you are today, and I don’t plan on ruining any chances at a future you guys have by asking you to move in with me and Dan.” there was a ‘but’ lingering, and I knew what was coming next before she even said it.

“But, we want to sell this house. It is just rotting away, and we don’t have the finances to save it, so we want to give someone else the chance to.” and there it was.

She is not only starting fresh with this baby, but with a new man and a new house. She no longer needed me and Lottie to run to the store for her, or to get her liquor. She didn’t need us to sell her pills or clean the vomit off of her body at three in the morning. There was no use for us in her life, so she was getting rid of us and any trace of the family we once were.

“What about me and Lottie?” I knew what was going to happen to us. If we, more me than Lottie because she already lives at Zayn’s while i’m just spending the nights at Harry’s, don’t find somewhere to live soon, we will be living on the streets.

“You guys are old enough to figure that out yourselves. You have come this far in the world without me, and I know you both can go much further. Neither one of you need to have your mother there with you every step of the way. It is your time to go out in the world and see where you belong,”

“I’m only in highschool!” I shouted, my voice cracking as tears began to burn my cheeks. “How am I supposed to find a job to make enough money so I can get a flat, while still going to school? How--”

“That’s enough, Louis Tomlinson. You were not raised to be afraid of the world. You are to do good things with what you have, even if that means giving up your education so you can make a living for yourself.”

Tears from desperation and the realization that my mum was abandoning us, soon turned into angry tears. I stood up from my chair faster than I ever have moved in my life, and in mere seconds the table that was once separating us was now shattering into pieces across the room, splinters flying everywhere.

“I raised myself, so don’t you ever fucking tell me how I was raised,” I was in her face now, my hands circling her arms and forcing them over so I could see the needle tracks that ran along her arms. “You were too busy shooting up all those drugs to even care about mine and Lottie’s life. You don't even talk about Spencer anymore! You act like he doesn't matter because he seen a way out and left,”

At the mention of her first forgotten child, my mum stiffened in her seat and the mask went flying back on. “Do you ever wonder about him or how he's doing? Of course not!  You don't give a shit about him. As long as you are happy, all is right. Is that how it's going to be with me and Lottie? The moment we move out we are forgotten and never to be spoken of again?”

“I think you should leave now. I’m tired.” she ripped one arm out of my grasp, then pried my fingers off of her bony wrists. Not even acknowledging what I had said or done, she got up from her seat and walked out of the kitchen, the last sight of her being with her back to me and her shoulder blades, along with every other bone in her body, pressing against her pale skin.

Without giving myself the chance to collapse to the dirty floor and allow myself to fall apart, I grabbed my hoodie from off of the back of the couch and stormed out of the house, slamming the door shut behind me. I descended the shitty stairs that felt like they were going to break under my weight, something I was sure the new buyers would love to fix, and walked across the wet grass.

It had been raining and there was a slight chill in the air, so, with a loud huff and a few curse words mumbled, I pulled on my hoodie and continued on my way down the street, going god only knows where. The material was lighter than my other hoodie, but it still managed to do it’s job at keeping the cool weather from nipping at my skin.

The remaining tears that stained my cheeks began to dry and left my face feeling tight, something I only noticed when I tipped my head back to study the rising sun. I can’t believe I let myself believe that my mother simply wanted to talk to me at four in the morning, and I can’t believe I hadn’t let Harry know. But maybe telling Harry wasn’t such a bad thing. I needed to think things over, and a walk was a perfect opportunity for that.

My footsteps made a wet, crunching noise on the damp pavement, small splashes from shallow puddles jumping up and lapping at the bottom of my jeans. My worn out shoes were completely soaked through, and I could feel as my toes began to grow numb from the water that felt like I had just dipper my toes in a bathtub full of ice water, but I continued to push forward.

One minute, the only thing that was running through my mind was my cold feet and the fact that I would get my ass chewed at when I got back to Harry’s, but the next, it was being swamped with thoughts of my mum and Lottie and what had just gone on.

I didn’t know what I was going to do, or where I was going to go, or what my mum was going to do now that she was pregnant yet again. Was she going to give up drugs? Was she going to stop drinking and finally get her act together? What about Lottie. I knew she was a lot closer to mum then she let on, so how was she going to handle everything when she finds out our mum is abandoning us.

Then the worries started to melt away and memories of the house began to play in my mind, memories I didn’t want to remember. They were depressing, mostly. All the once happy memories I may have made in that house were replaced with ones of my mum stumbling through the door, drunk, high, or both-- off her ass with a man in tow behind her. 

Or memories of the first time my mum had hit me, and every time after that. I couldn’t remember one good thing that happened in that house that didn’t involve either me or Lottie getting hurt or in trouble. 

The depressing thing is, though, is that I don’t have one single memory of Spencer. I knew who he was because Lottie talked about him a lot, but I wasn’t old enough to actually know him. He was fifteen years old when he left to live with our dad, and nobody, not even my mum, has heard from him since. He had only been apart of my mother’s early partying days.

He got to miss out on seeing her sprawled out on the couch with a needle shoved in her arm, and walking into her room at two in the morning because you had a nightmare, only to see her having sex with some dude. He only had to endure the three years she spent crying and drowning her sorrows in alcohol.

But I can’t say I blamed him. If I had gotten a chance to go live with my father when I was younger, I would have jumped at the opportunity. Now? Not so much. 

When I was younger I believed my father was the greatest man in the world. He could have been beating my mum or anyone else in front of me and I would still look at him like he was walking on the moon. But now that i’m older, I know he wasn’t the type of man I wanted in my life. He was a liar, a cheater, and a possible abuser. He was everything I never wanted to be.

But like, holy fuck, what did I do to deserve such a shitty life?

I mean, the moment my dad left it was like a plate in the earth sifted. It was like the universe didn’t want me to be happy, because when things were finally starting to look up for me, I had to fuck up in some way and ruin everything.

Except for now. I had Harry, and I haven’t fucked that up (yet). 

Sighing, I shoved my hands into my pockets and pulled out my cellphone. It was still early in the morning, it only being just after six o’clock. I was hoping it was later so I could go find a coffee shop to buy a  tea or something to warm myself up with, or just anything to use as an excuse so I didn’t have to go and face Harry yet. 

I wasn’t ready to face him.

Then I remembered the park. It was a perfect place to just go and sit and relax and let yourself ponder life itself as you stare at the empty swing sets.

My body jerking in a different direction, my legs began to move with ease, and in no time, I was walking up to the bench that set in front of the playground.

The place was deserted. Nobody was insight, not even a stray animal. It was almost creepy, but when I set down and looked up at the sky to see the sun breaking through the thick clouds, I couldn’t think that anymore.

Rays of sunlight began to stream through the clouds and make all the tiny droplets of water that rested on the leaves of the trees shimmer. It was breathtaking the way that small droplet looked in the light, and it was just enough for me to let my mind wander.

~~~

With shaking hands, I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cellphone. Tears were streaming down my face and landing on my hoodie, making wet patches on the dark material.

I had no idea what had happened, but one minute I was daydreaming about me and Harry, and the next minute I was crying because somehow everything came flooding back and I realized that the first time I had seen my mother sober in years, was for her to tell me she was upgrading her family. 

I clicked on Harry’s contact and held the phone up to my ear, my breathing shallow and rough all at the same time. The phone ringed a few times before Harry picked up, his voice thick with sleep and disoriented.

“Hello?”

“H-Harry” it came out a cracked whisper, and that just made my tears fall harder.

“Louis? What the hell? Where are you? Are you downstairs? Why are you calling me? What's wrong?” he sounded worried, making me let out a choked sob. 

How did I deserve him?

“My m-mum wanted to talk so I left and now I can’t breath and my world is falling apart and Harry.” I didn’t think I could face him yet, that I didn’t need him, but I realized all too soon how wrong I was. I needed him to tell me everything was going to be okay. I needed him to hold me and comfort me. I needed him to make me feel like something, at least one thing, was alright in this world.

“Where are you?” he growled into the phone, and I could hear as the door to his bedroom opened, followed by his rapid footsteps down the stairs.

Fuck. I fucked up. I am making Harry worried because I am not strong enough on my own to handle my own feelings. What the fuck was I thinking?

Crying harder, but not wanting Harry to hear, I cupped a hand over my mouth to stifle my sobs and only removed it when I was sure there was going to be no more of those disgusting noises. “I’m sorry I worried you. I’m fine. Go back to bed. I’ll see you in a little,”

He went to answer, but I didn’t give him a chance to before I hung up my phone, turned it on silent, and stood up. With my phone now tucked safely in my pocket, and silent tears now rolling down my face, I began to walk.

I walked much like I did this morning; with no destination. Every once in awhile I got the urge to check my phone when I seen a couple on the street being all lovey and dovey, but I managed to keep myself from doing so by digging my fingernails into the palm of my hand. 

I didn’t know where my legs had led me until I glanced up and seen I was standing in front of a… pet store? Cupping my hands to shield the sun, I looked through the glass and seen all the different cages full of animals.

This is exactly what I needed.

Brushing the tears off my face, and all the problems that have nestled their way onto my shoulders, I pulled open the door and like a hand smacking me in the face, a rush of stale, shitty air smacked directly into my face and forced its way into my nostrils.

Trying to keep myself from vomiting, I walked into the pet store…

~~~

(Shitty transition, I know, but shhhh)

I pressed my face against the wiring on the cage to try and get a better look at the small bundle in the corner of the cage, it being blocked by all the cats that were trying to claw at my face. I was guessing it was a kitten, but I couldn’t tell because of the way it was positioned.

I have made my way around the entire store and visited each and every animal in here, except for the snakes and spiders because those things scared the crap out of me, and now I was at my last stop. Cats were adorable creatures, and i’ve always wanted one, but the ones that were all up in my business right now didn’t seem like the type I would get.

Their fur was smooth, their eyes were black and kinda creepy, and they all seemed like attention whores. Which brings me back to the thing in the corner. I turn around to ask the guy, whose name is Jon and has been good at assisting me today, what it was only to discover he is standing right beside me.

“Cat in the back? It’s a female, we call her Zoey, she is a runt and we have yet to discover her breed,” Aha! So it was a cat.

Smiling widely, I turn back to the cage and stick my finger through a small opening on the side, near the back. “Zoey,” I whisper, my finger brushing against the side of her body. I went to repeat the action, but a hand on my shoulder stopped me.

“Careful there. Zoey has been bought twice, but they have brought her back because she is fiesty. Since the last family, she hasn’t let anyone touch her,” Jon warned, his voice just loud enough for me to hear so the other customers didn’t know of their potentially dangerous cat.

Furrowing my brows, I shrugged his hand off and reached for the hook on the cage, which was on the side, that would unhook the door and let it open. “May I?” I asked, to which he shrugged and took a step back.

Scooting forward even more, I leaned to the side for better access and opened the door. The cats began to group by it, all of them trying to get out, by thanks to a sudden hand that appeared that began to shoo them away, I was able to grab the bundle in the back by the back of it’s neck and lift it out.

Jon had been right. She was the runt, or so I think because she was tiny. I had small hands, but even so, she barely overlapped them. The stubborn thing kept her head buried in her chest and I was beginning to worry that she was dead until her tiny ear flinched, and her head began to lift.

I held my breath in anticipation, and when I was finally able to look at her face, I felt my heart melt and my eyes turn to mush. “You are such a cute little thing, aren’t you?” I asked her quietly, my finger scratching the small space behind her ear.

She opened her mouth and yawned at me, but didn’t do anything else. She just sat there and stared at me with her large blue eyes that had tiny black slits in them. Her black fur was sticking out everywhere, and now that I was able to look at her from this point of view, I noticed that her head was at least a size too big for her body.

But she was absolutely adorable.

My brain kept telling him to put her back, that I couldn’t afford to have a kitten (and not to mention the fact that I had nowhere to keep one), but my heart was telling me something completely different. “I’ll take her,” I whispered to Jon, but continued staring at the kitten. I knew my brain was right, but I didn’t care. I was listening to my heart right now, and that seemed to make not only me happy, but the cat too because at the words, she perked up and licked the pad of my thumb. 

It tickled, and I let myself giggle. I didn't care that I sounded like a child, a girl one at that. All I cared about was that I was happy on a day I thought was full of nothing but disaster. 

Patting my pocket, to make sure my two hundred dollars was still there (the money I have been saving up for a long while now), and completely missing Jon’s wary look, I stood up and followed him to the front of the store, the kitten cradled carefully in my arm. 

After paying a little over a hundred for her, I managed to get a bag of cat food, a food tray, a water tray, a pink collar, a few small toys, kitty litter, a kitty litter box and I still had five dollars left to get me a tea or something. 

Moving the bag to rest in the crook of my elbow, I told Jon goodbye and walked out of the pet store exactly two hours after entering it. Zoey was curled up in a tiny ball in my arm and her black fur blended in with the material of my hoodie. 

Smiling at her, I rubbed the top of her head with my finger as I began to walk. To look at, you would think her fur was rough and gross feeling, but it was surprisingly soft and it made me smile everytime I twirled the long piece that stuck out on top of her head. 

I had only made it a block from the pet shop when both of my arms began to tire and the bag felt like it weighed a hundred pounds. I knew that the closest tea shop was at least another three blocks away, but I wasn't sure I was up to walking that far with these two. 

Gnawing on my bottom lip,  I moved to the side of the sidewalk to get out of everyone's way and leaned against the building, the bag sandwiched between me and the cool wall. I wanted to call Harry and ask him for a ride, but upon unlocking my phone and seeing the twenty seven missed calls and fifty text messages, all from Harry, the three blocks wasn't looking so far. 

“Be prepared to get yelled at,” Louis whispered to the tiny thing he cradled in his arms as he dialed Harry’s number. 

Not even two rings later and the line was picking up. “I have searched this entire fucking town. Where are you?”

Rolling in the balls of my feet, I hissed into the phone and looked around. “By buildings,” I said, which probably wasn't a good idea. Harry wasn't happy, that I knew, but where was the harm? Could he even get any angrier. 

Turns out he could. 

“I'm not playin' Louis. You have five seconds to tell me where you are before I go and knock on your mother's door.”

“You wouldn't,” I gasped, nearly dropping both Zoey and the bag. 

Glaring up at me, Zoey meowed at me, displeased with the sudden shift. Bouncing her like she was a baby, I stared at the street across from me, trying to calculate how fast I could make it to my mothers. 

“Try me,” I could hear something creek on the other side, and I knew that sound all too well. 

I quickly tell him where I'm at and as soon as he gets the address, all I hear is his car door slamming shut before the line goes dead. 

_ Oh fuck.  _

A few minutes passed by with me chewing on my lip before I seen Harry pull up in his impala, the tinted windows rolled up. I pushed myself off of the wall and  began to cautiously walk towards him, but stopped when I seen his door open. 

Climbing out of the car, Harry walked around it and my mouth went dry. He was wearing grey sweatpants that hung low on his hips and no shirt whatsoever. His tattooes, and everything else, including his extra nipples, was out in display for everyone around us to see. 

A few women stopped to gawk at the long legged god as he walked towards me, his flaming emerald eyes locked on me. His jaw was clenched and his lips were locked together in a tight lipped frown. 

And holy fuck!  Even though he looks like he wants to murder me, he is  _ hot.  _

“Nice to see you went shopping,” he said huskily, his long fingers gesturing towards the bag. 

I swallowed thickly and simply nodded. 

“For what?”

“Zoey,” I said, holding up the arm that held the kitten in it. At the mention of her name, she popped her head up and looked at Harry curiously, her head tilted to the side. 

“You bought a cat?” he asked, sounding mystified as he eyed the black creature. 

“I did,”

“Why the fuc--” cutting Harry off, I held up my hand and shook my head. 

“I bought her because I wanted her. I never once assumed I would be keeping her at your house, so don't even worry. I plan on finding a place for the two of us to stay,”

Shocked by my sudden outburst, Harry stepped forward and laid his hand on my shoulder. “I wasn't going to say she couldn't stay at  _ our _ place,” our place? “I was just asking why you got a cat,” speaking softer now, Harry pulled me closer to him and looked down at Zoey before he looked at all the curious bystanders. “Why don't we get in the car so you can tell me what happened today?”

Nodding in agreement, I let Harry take the bag of Zoey’s stuff before I climbed into the car and set Zoey in my lap. Unhappy with the movement, Zoey meowed a few times before she realized my thighs were comfortable and laid on them. 

I laughed quietly at that, my fingers stroking along the side of her body as I waited for Harry to get in the car so I could tell him what he wanted to know. And as soon as his door was closed, I did. I told him about how my mum called me this morning and asked if I could come over and talk, what happened when I agreed and went over to the house, and then I explained why I didn't tell him and what I have been doing since. Harry just hummed and nodded when necessary, but he didn't say anything the entire car ride. 

By the time I finished, we were pulling into one of their many garages. Harry shut the car off, grabbed the bag from by my feet, and got out of the car. I followed after him, moving the cat so she was now held against my chest. 

“You can keep her,” Harry said as he opened the door to the house and walked in. 

“I know I'm keeping her. I'm going to find a flat for us to li-”

Without letting me finish that sentence, Harry dropped the bag to the floor, spun around and pinned me against the door, trapping poor Zoey between us. “Neither one of you will be moving out. Tomorrow we will go and get the rest of your things from your mums, then we will go and get Zoey a few more things, and both of you will remain living here,”

I didn't have time to react before he was pulling away and walking into the kitchen with the bag now in his hand. 

“He's a little bi-polar,” I whispered to Zoey, breathless. I followed Harry into the kitchen and seen he was talking to Anne, who was sitting at the island. He was probably filling her in. 

Humming to myself, I plopped down on the floor and spread my legs, then set the kitten down. She stretched each and every one of her arms, then her back, yawned, and began to walk around. Her tiny body tilted with every step she took because of how proportioned her head was, but that didn't stop her from exploring the kitchen. 

I didn't know it, but both Anne and Harry stopped talking and they too began to watch the cat and the way it walked. They watched as she looked at everything in amazement before she made her way back to me, her paw coming up and resting on my thigh as she stared at me with those adorable blue eyes. 

Her eyes were too focused for a cat, and it seemed like she was telling me everything was going to be alright with just that simple look, but I knew better than to believe that. Scooping her up, I brought her to eye level and laughed loudly, my eyes crinkling by the corners, as she licked the tip of my nose. 

“She seems to like you,” Anne said, making both me and Zoey look in her direction. The cat jumped out of my hands and strutted over to where Anne was, her body maneuvering between the chair legs as she rubbed against them. 

Anne laughed and picked her up, her eyes lighting up as she held the tiny kitten between her hands. “Your a cute little thing, aren't you, Zoey?” Yup, Harry was filling her in. 

Rolling my eyes, I stood up and walked over to where they were. I had expected to grab the cat, but instead, the cat was passed off to Harry (who instantly put her on the ground with a disgusted look on his face) and I was pulled into a hug. 

“You are welcome to live here, Louis. I love you like you were my own, and I would never throw you out on the street,” she said softly, like in a motherly way. I could feel as the tears began to return, and I think Anne knew too because she squeezed my body harder and held me for a few minutes. 

“Thank you,” I whispered when I began to pull back. She smiled warmly at me and rubbed my shoulder before looking on the floor at the cat who was waiting patiently by my feet. 

“Why don't you go show her your new room?” She suggested, her arms falling away when I nodded and bent to pick Zoey up. 

“Come on, baby girl, let's go show you where Harry likes to sleep,”

“Why are you showing the cat where I sleep?” Harry asked, alarmed as he watched me start to walk away. “Louis? Why does the cat need to know where I sleep?”

He continued hollering after me, but I chose to ignore him. I gave Zoey a brief walk through of the downstairs, and when I reached the stairs to show her the way to our room, I heard Harry and Anne in the kitchen. 

“I was scared, mum. I thought he had left me this morning,” Harry’s voice was pained, and it sounded like he was crying.

“He would never leave you, Harry. You mean a lot to that boy. He l--” I stopped listening then. I didn’t want to know what Anne was going to tell him. No, I didn’t want to hear her say that word. I was still struggling with my feelings, and whenever I heard that simple word, Harry was all I thought about and I’m not sure I’m ready to admit I like him a lot more than he knows.

\----

Harry’s POV:

I made my way up the stairs, my feet dragging behind me. I was so fucking drained, both physically and emotionally. When I agreed to date Louis, I knew I was agreeing to some pretty questionable things, but never did I think I would be close to having a heart attack at the age of seventeen over a simple phone call. Well, the phone call and finding myself alone in  _ our  _ bed. 

Our bed.

It sounded so nice to say in my mind, but out loud it had a nice ring to it. 

Smiling lopsidedly, I walked into our bedroom, but stopped in the doorway. Louis was laying on his stomach on the floor in front of our bed. The cat thing, whatever it's name was, was sitting in front of him, it's head nodding as Louis whispered to it. 

“And Harry will act like he doesn't like you, but he will. He didn't like me much at first, but now he can't get enough of me.  All you have to do is wiggle your butt a little,  take over his bed and sleep with him once in awhile, then he is like putty in your hands,” 

I bite my lip to keep myself from talking, and watched as Louis peeked over his shoulder quickly before looking back at the cat. 

Little shit knows I'm here. 

“And if you really want to press your luck, all you have to do is steal his cookies from the top of his closet (again) and eat them. If he doesn't yell at you, that means he likes you,” Louis said as he reached into a box next hidden beside his body and pulled out a chocolate chip cookie. 

“How the hell did you find those?” Screw the no talking thing. I have hid my cookies all over and he still manages to find them. Every. Single. Time. 

Rolling onto his back and grinning at me around a mouth full of cookies, Louis shrugged. “I got a good nose,” he said, words muffled and eyes bright. 

Sighing in exasperation, I walked over to him and set down by his feet. Reaching across him, I grabbed the cookies and thanked god there was more than crumbs in here. “Looks like I'll start having to buy raisin cookies,” I mumbled as I pulled a cookie out of a sleeve. 

Gasping, Louis setup and moved his head so we were staring at one another. “You wouldn't buy those, those  _ nasty _ things!” His nose wrinkled up and his move fell into a frown, making him look thoroughly disgusted. 

“If it means I get more cookies to myself, then yes,” lies. I would never buy raisin cookies. They were one of my favorites, but I wasn't going to stop buying chocolate chip cookies just so I could have more. I kind of looked forward to finding Louis eating my cookies. And to think it all started with a muffled whisper from the closet when I called his name. 

The little shit had, the first time, found my cookies underneath my bed and hid in the closet so he could eat them. When I yelled for him, he had a mouthful of cookies, and was covered in crumbs that would incriminate him, so he mumbled ‘shit’ and that led to him being caught chased through the house. 

“You're so rude,” Louis exclaimed as he threw himself back, dragging me out of my memories. 

Snorting, I shook the now empty box before I threw it at him. “Says the one who has a stomach full of cookies while there are starving people around the world,”

Pouting, Louis threw the box to the corner of the room and looked at me. “Not fair. I've had a bad day and I deserve to eat as many cookies as I want, so don't make me feel like a, a cookie monster,” 

Nodding, I laid down and scooted up a little so our bodies were aligned. “You're right,” wrapping my arm around his waist to hold him in place, I kissed the corner of his chocolate covered lips. “The princess shall have whatever she'd like today with no consequences or repercussions,”

Huffing at the name, but not saying anything, Louis turned his face and pulled mine down so our lips were almost touching. “The princess demands a kiss,” and a kiss is what she shall receive. 

Smashing our lips together, I was shocked by Louis straightforwardness, but went along with it. I opened my mouth when Louis’ tongue ran along my bottom lip, and I let the tongue that tasted like chocolate explore my mouth. 

It ran along the inside of my cheeks, across my teeth, then the roof of my mouth before it began to fight for dominance against my tongue. 

Our tongues collided and slid against one another, and unknowingly, so were our bodies. Flipping me onto my back so he was now straddling me, Louis held onto my curls as he deepened our kiss. 

The kiss grew desperate as he rocked the lower half of his body against mine. He pulled back from the kiss long enough to draw in a deep breath, as well as I,  then he took my bottom lip between his teeth and began to tug hard. 

I groaned at the feeling, my eyes snapping open and locking with his. The desperation that was reflected in his eyes seemed to do something for my libido because I felt myself start to grow hard. 

My hands running along the length of his body, I was groping and rubbing every inch I could, my hand straying on the curve of his back, just above the swell of his ass.

“Louis,” I warned, wanting him to know that in only a matter of seconds I would be fucking him if he didn't let go of my lip.

Eyes gleaming, Louis’ teeth clamped down harder, but not hard enough for blood to yet be drawn. Grasping his hips, I flipped him over and managed not to rip my lip off while doing so.

My hand moved between our bodies and I was just about to undo his pants when my bedroom door opened and Gemma walked in. She froze on the spot, her eyes widening when she seen her half naked brother on top of a flushed looking boy who still held her brothers lip between his teeth.

“Urm, mum sent me up to get you two. Lunch is ready,” she rushed out, quickly stumbling out of the room as fast as she could and closing the door behind her.

Letting go of my lip, Louis let his head fall against the ground as he took in a shuddering breath. “Your mother has horrible timing,” he groaned, covering his face with his hand.

Agreeing silently with him, I got up off the ground and looked down at my crotch. “This will be hard to hide,” I said, staring at the large tent in my trousers.

Peeking between his fingers, Louis giggled and set up. “I caused it, so why don't I help you?”

Without waiting for a response from me, he pulled down my pants and shoved my entire length in his mouth with one go.

\---

After having the best blow job of my life, and obviously returning the favor to Louis as quickly as I could, we made our way down the stairs and into the dining room.

My mum and Gemma were already seated at the table, Gemma looking flushed with embarrassment while my Mum gave me a knowing look.

Rolling my eyes at the two, I pulled Louis to sit next to me and helped him dish up a small salad and handed him a Turkey sandwich.

We ate quietly for a few minutes, the only sound being the occasional scrape of the fork, and it was driving me mad. I opened my mouth to speak, but my mum beat me to it. “Gemma, dear, why don't you take Louis shopping tomorrow? Help him pick some things out for Zoey and himself,”

At the mention of shopping, Gemmas face lit up and she looked like she was ready to explode. “Yes!  I would love to!  We can go to the mall for you and… wait, isn't tomorrow prom?” Her face fell, and so did everyone else's fork.

Prom. How the fuck did I forget about that?

Glancing down at Louis, we watched as tongue peeked past his lips as he got lost deep in thought. Finally, after several moments, he speaks, “I don't want to go to prom anymore,” it was quiet, but we all still heard it.

“Why?” My mum asked, her hand reaching across the table to grab Louis’.

“I don't know, I just don't feel like it. There's so much going on, and it's not like I'm missing out on my only prom. There will be one next year,” he looked up he questioningly, and when I nodded in agreeance, he smiled at my Mum. “I am so sorry you had to waste the money on the suit, and I promise I will pay it all back to you one day,”

“Nonsense, love. It is my gift to you. Why don't you and Harry use it one night to go out to dinner? You both deserve some peaceful time alone,” she waggled her eyebrows suggestively, and I repressed the urge to vomit.

“I will gouge out my eyeballs if you  _ ever  _ do that again,” I said, which made everyone at the table laugh.

Everything stopped then and I was able to lean back and watch as three of the people I cared about the most in the world, all laughed and cracked jokes together. I don't know if it's Louis that's turning me into a sap, or if I am getting sick or something, but nothing has ever looked more beautiful to me, than this moment.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello, everyone! I bring you a new chapter on this beautiful day! Now, this chapter is... Ugh.... You'll have to read it to find out, but I am warning you it does switch between POV's a lot. And I mean a lot. It kinda works though, and I have a feeling nobody will be too upset about it after you finish. :) Anywho, thank you guys for reading this story and voting on it. And even though I know some of you will be upset by this, this book will be ending soon. Possibly in the next few chapters. I'll probably do two or three more chapters, then it will be the end of ISWAW....
> 
>  
> 
> BUT NOT FOREVER! I will be writing a sequel to this book, and I promise it will be much better. (I couldn't leave you guys with just one book, come on. I'm not that mean) I still haven't decided how long the next book will be, but I have a feeling it will be quite a few chapters.
> 
> Now, how about I let you get to reading, Yeah? Okay. Have a lovely day, and don't forget to comment!! :)
> 
> (Oh, and please don't hate me for this chapter)

_ Third person POV: _

_ Harry had been peacefully asleep on his stomach, his face buried in his pillow and his arm around Louis’ body. He had wanted to stay that way too, but he couldn’t ignore those pitiful whimpers he kept on hearing. At first he thought it was the cat, and he kept mumbling at it to shut up. But when he started to come to, and the fog lifted from his head, he could hear they weren’t cat whimpers, but rather human. _

_ He listened closely for a second to make sure he wasn’t going crazy, and sure enough, there was a very pitiful whimper that tugged on his heart strings, followed by a choked, muffled sob. _

_ Rolling onto his back, Harry lifted his head up lazily and look around the room, just now noticing Louis wasn’t next to him. The thing he had been cuddling, was a pillow. Furrowing his eyebrows, Harry palmed at his eyes to try and get rid of the sleep that still clung to them, and he sat up slowly. He looked around the room again with fresher eyes, having to squint and strain his eyes to see the black blob that was curled in a ball on his balcony. _

_ Yawning, Harry fisted a handful of his blanket and drug it along with him as he stood up and made his way over to the balcony. It might be from the sleep, or the fact that he was just clueless, but Harry still hadn’t caught onto what was going on. All he knew was there was strange noises coming from the black blob (Louis) on his balcony, and he needed to investigate. _

_ But he never expected to see Louis sitting on the cold black steel, his eyes red and puffy and tears streaming down his cheeks. “She doesn’t love me, Harry,” a heart-wrenching whisper swallowed by the wind.  _

_ Harry didn’t need to question it. He knew who he was talking about.  _

_ Sighing, and all trace of sleep gone, Harry kneeled next to Louis and wrapped the blanket around his visibly tense shoulders. He didn’t know what to say. What was he supposed to say after something like that? _

_ “Louis,” he sighed, settling down onto his butt and pulling the small boy into his lap. “There is no way she couldn’t love you, Boo Bear. You are Louis Tomlinson, the most lovable thing I have ever laid my eyes on,” _

_ “Exactly, I’m Louis Tomlinson; social outcast, loser, nerd, disappointment to all. How the fuck is my own mother supposed to love me when no one else does?” _

_ “No, you stop that right now. I’m not going to sit here and listen to you jabber your jaws and spout bullshit. You are loved by many, and the moment you stop trying to gain your mother’s approval and love, will be the moment you realize all this, Lou.” Louis curled into Harry and buried his face in his neck, his tears staining the white t-shirt Harry wore. “You are Louis Tomlinson, the boy who is smarter than any person in our damn school. You will make this world a better place, and I hope to god that someday you will realize how much you are loved. Just because she is choosing not to be in your life, doesn’t mean shit about you or the person you are.  _

_ Let go of your mom and your past, and embrace those around you that love you. Show her what she is missing out on, and make her regret ever breaking that little heart of yours.” Pulling him back, Harry wiped the tears away from Louis’ eyes and held the shining stare with his own heated one. “I am never leaving you, Louis Tomlinson. I love that bubble butt of yours too much,” _

_ A watery smiled stretched Louis’ lips and even though he felt like he couldn’t do it, he smiled a soft, genuine smile and pecked Harry’s nose. “What would I do without you, Hazza?” he said aloud, asking himself more so than Harry. He rested his forehead against Harry’s, the blanket falling from his shoulders as he wrapped his arms around his neck. _

_ The two set there, wrapped around each other with a comfortable silence settling over them. There were occasional sniffles and hiccups as Louis calmed down, but neither of them said anything, nor did they move. They enjoyed the other’s presence, afraid that if they spoke they would disturb this moment. _

_ But all good things must come to an end. _

_ “Harry?” Louis finally asked, quietly. His lips brushing against Harry’s as he pulled back. _

_ “Hmm?” Harry hummed, letting him know he was listening. _

_ “I wanna go to prom.” _

_ “I know.” He knew Louis better than he knew himself. _

_ \---- _

_ Harry’s POV: _

Ahh, the day of prom. It was like a fucking headache wrapped in pretty pink paper. 

I gritted my teeth and shoved my hands into my pockets, trying to get rid of all these thoughts. Louis wanted to go to prom, and I'd rather rip out my own teeth than see that look of disappointment he'd try and hide behind a fake smile.    
  
And even with that thought in mind, I couldn't keep myself from shying away from all the balloons and decorations that were being rushed down the hallway, or stop the temptation I had felt to trip the kid that was running down the hall with a suspicious looking box full of glittery shit.    
  
I would have tripped him, too, if I hadn't seen that damn boys smile clear down the hallway. The moment that I had seen it, I couldn't see anything else. I kept my eyes trained on his backside as I pushed my way down the hall, thankful that today people decided to fuck off and not gawk at me.    
  
He was standing on a little step ladder, a bundle of rolled up posters shoved under his arm. I felt a tug in my jeans when he leaned forward to hang up a poster, making his hoodie slid up and reveal a patch of his pale, smooth skin.    
  
I groaned deep in my chest, my teeth clamping around my bottom lip. How the fuck was I still so  _ attracted _ to him? Usually, after fucking someone at least once, I get tired of them and throw them away but gawd. This boy was doing things to my body, and he wasn't even touching me.    
  
"Nice ass," I remarked, leaning against a set of lockers. I had managed to stop myself from smacking his ass, luckily, but I couldn't stop the words from coming out of my mouth. And if anyone had a problem with that, I'd gladly rip off their heads.    
  
A very loud, very Louis sounding squeak left his mouth as he turned around and tried to glare at me. I say try, because his wide eyes and red cheeks wasn't having it. "Shush. Someone could hear you," he hissed, carefully climbing down the ladder.    
  
I rolled my eyes. He clearly doesn't know who I am. "Annnd do you think I care? Let the world know that you have a nice a..." I was cut off when a piece of paper was being shoved in my mouth.    
  
"I told you to shut up," his eyes were wide and he was panting, but I'm not sure it was out of fear. It might have something to do with the fact he possibly had to jump to reach my mouth, or because I was staring at him with a cocked eyebrow and darkening eyes.    
  
He was being sassy, and I liked it. What can I say?    
  
"What are you going to do about it?" I asked after removing the bundled up mess of slobber and paper.    
  
He blinked, furrowed his eyebrows, then grinned brightly. Glancing over his shoulder at all the people that were still running through the hallways, Louis grabbed my hand and quickly pulled us into the closest door we passed. Which just so happened to be one of the janitor closets.    
  
Before the door was even closed and the light was flicked on, I was being shoved against the door and a tongue was being shoved down my throat. My eyes widened for a split second, then I caught onto what was going on and wrapped one arm around him, pulling him closer to me, and maneuvered the other one around his body so I could cup the back of his head, deepening the kiss.    
  
His hands trailed down my body, tracing over the curve of my hip before his hand snuck up my shirt. I followed his lead and snuck my hand up his shirt.  While he was greeted with taut skin stretched over my hips, and abs that clenched and danced beneath his fingertips, I was greeted with smooth, squishy sides and a small belly. But god, I wouldn't want to feel anything else. I wouldn't want him to _ be _ anyone else.

Louis' teeth tugged at my bottom lip before he sucked it into his mouth, his hands moving along my torso all the while and sending shivers running through my body. I didn't know what had caused this, but I wouldn't be the one to stop it, even if my pants were growing considerably tighter the closer he got to the elastic band of my boxers. 

I tried to move my hand down his pants, to cup his ass and pull his hips against mine. But he wasn't having it. The moment I moved my hand around his body, he moved his spare hand up to my head and tugged at my curls, each tug going straight to my groin.    
  
I couldn't help the moan that built up my throat, and Louis seemed to sense what he had done because he shoved his tongue into my mouth and swallowed the small noise I had made.    
  
My lungs began to feel tight, but I didn't want to pull away. This was _ too _ good to stop, with his teeth clanking against mine as his tongue moved around my mouth and fought against mine. The desperation he was showing was evident, and even though the stars I began to see behind my closed eyelids made this that much  _ better _ , I couldn't handle it anymore.    
  
I finally pulled my lips away, reluctantly, but not too far. I could still feel his lips brushing against mine as our breathes clashed together. "What was that?" I panted, my voice scratchy.    
  
Louis closed his eyes and leaned his head against my chest, his breath hot against my neck. "Gottcha to shut up," he murmured, sounding as dazed as I felt.    
  
I could still feel his lips against mine, feel his tongue roaming my mouth. My entire body went tingly as I remembered, and when a gentle kiss was placed on the corner of my mouth, a shiver ran down my spine.    
  
"You can shut me up like that any time you'd like," I chuckled, my hands staying clasped around his body. My mind was fuzzy and I was having problems deciphering my previous thoughts from my current thoughts right now.    
  
With him pinned up against me the way he was, his stiffy digging into my leg, I couldn't remember why I didn't want to go to prom. I couldn't remember why I didn't enjoy walking down the hallway that stunk of various girl perfumes and axe. I couldn't even remember why I had a strong distaste for the glittery posters hanging throughout the school.    
  
All I could remember, was _ why _ I wanted to go to prom, and what I would enjoy about it. I knew that when me and Louis walked down the hallway with his suspiciously smelling girl perfume (though he'd never admit)  clogging my nose,  I would be more than happy to breath it in. I could remember why I liked Louis standing next to those glittery posters that sparkle like his eyes.    
  
And when I closed my eyes, I seen that soft, shy smile of his that he would be wearing as we slow danced to the song I specifically requested earlier this week.    
  
Damn, imagine how shitty that would have been if he had actually decided not to come to prom. It would have been a perfect waste of a good song, but I'd of course find another way to play it.    
  
Then, like a freight train running straight into my chest, I realized something. I didn't  _ like  _ any of those things. I didn't like the posters, or the perfumes, or the cheesy ass songs they played at proms. I only thought I liked all of those things because of the person I would be with. I knew how he would look as we danced, and how he'd look as we walked down the hallway or how happy he'd get when he walked into the gym and seen all his hard work this past week, turned into something so beautiful and so  _ magical _ .    
  
My heart fluttered in my chest as these thoughts played over and over again in my head, and before I could stop myself from speaking the words that came out of my mouth like air came out of my lungs, my thoughts were brought to life and I was admitting something that terrified me and shook me to my very core, but also made me stand taller and feel  _ stronger _ . Like I was suddenly invincible.    
  
"I love Louis Tomlinson." It was said in a glorified breath that wrecked my very existence, but I would never take it back.    
  
I loved him more than I had ever thought I could love another person. I loved his smile, and the childish games he played, and the cute tantrums he threw when he didn't get his way. I loved the way his body bowed beneath mine and the way my name sounded falling from his lips. I loved waking up to him curled up at my side, but most importantly, I loved the person I was when I was with him.    
  
He made me  _ stronger _ . He made me want to be something, to actually do something with my life. I felt like I could take on the whole world and win, as long as he was standing there beside me, his hand so carefully placed in mine.    
  
"I love Harry Styles," he said it in such a quiet voice that I wouldn't have heard it if my ears hadn't caught on fire as they instantly recognized what he had said.    
  
And it wasn't until I finally looked down at him and seen he was grinning brilliantly up at me, his cheeks a bright red color and his eyes shining, that I realized he was so much more to me than just my strength.    
  
_ He is also my weakness.  _

\-------

Louis’ POV:

 

“Are you ready?” a raspy voice asked on the other side of the door, their knuckles scraping against the wood.

“Almost!” I yelled back, my heart hammering in my chest. I gave the pale, yet stunning boy one last glance in the mirror before I smiled softly and turned around. With a shaking hand and a deep breath, I opened the door and came face to face with Harry.

There, standing in front of me with his broad shoulders squared and his jaw clenched, was a god. His long legs were constricted in tight black skinny jeans that were so tight I could see the scar on the upper part of his right thigh if I looked close enough. He had on a simple black buttoned up shirt, the top three buttons undone and exposing his creamy chest. His tattoos were peaking out from underneath his shirt, but the black and white bandana he had on around his neck was covering them.

Thrown carelessly over his shoulder was his jacket, and sitting on top of his head, confining his perfect curls, was a black fedora hat that looked so perfect compared to his light skin tone. His plump pink lips were pulled into a smile and his dark, hungry eyes were moving over my body, similar to the way mine were just moving over his.

The only difference was I looked nowhere near as good as Harry did. He was flawless, while I had to squeeze my ass into these pants only ten minutes ago. Watching as his jaw ticked along with the seconds, I was beginning to wonder if Harry was going to say, or do, anything when his mother walked into the room and broke both of us out of our ogling session.

“You two are so handsome!” she shrieked. I flinched at the compliment, still not used to getting them from anyone, even though Harry, and his family, complimented me every chance they got.

I forced a smile and walked into Anne’s open arms, allowing her to embrace me in a hug. “Thank you,” I whispered in her ear, receiving nothing but a tighter squeeze in response.

“Now come on, let me get pictures!” she let go of me, and I watched with wide eyes as she drug Harry through the door and down the hallway, Harry yelling my name. I knew if I didn’t follow them fast enough, the Anne would turn back around and drag me down the hallway too. But I couldn’t stop myself from stopping in front of Harry’s mirror in his room.

I had on a navy blue suit, matched with a white dress shirt and dark blue tie. The suit was extremely tight, especially in my ass area, yet I have never looked better. My hair was styled up in a perfect quiff and my cheeks naturally looked hollow, making me look like a normal kid, rather than a nerd. I had replaced my glasses with contacts, giving my eyes a chance to draw attention to themselves. I’ve always been told my eyes were my strongest trait, and I have never realized it until tonight.

They were really blue tonight, making them look exceptional, especially compared to my dark suit.

I heard the faint click of a camera snapping pictures, and I realized the moment I walked down those stairs I would be blinded by the flash from the camera. Deciding I needed to get this over and done with, rather than hide up here in Harry’s room, I took a deep breath and slowly made my way down the hall, then down the spiral-like stairs.

“You better show that boy the time of his life,” a woman's voice, which would only belong to Anne, said, sounding so cold and threatening. I nearly fell face first down the stairs when I came to a screeching halt at the second stair to the top. Was she talking about me? Well, of course she was, who else would she be practically threatening Harry over.

A low, raspy voice responded, making my smile grow and my heart thump wildly against my chest. “He will have nothing but the time of his life, I promise,” and I didn’t know if it was because I was smitten by him, or because of how sincere he sounded, but I knew Harry meant that promise, and that he would try to fulfill it no matter the consequences.

Glowing with pride, I finished walking down the stairs, willingly submerging myself into a world full of awkward poses and flashing cameras.

\---

“Yes, yes, I promise we will be home by midnight,” Harry sighed, placing a hand on his mother’s shoulder so she would stop. He smiled a tight, closed lip smile and slammed to door shut, his shoulders visibly relaxing.

“Come on, Mr. Grumpus! Prom awaits us!” I declared, tugging on his arm to make him walk. He looked at me for a second, rolled his eyes, and completely relaxed before he grabbed my hand.

“Your chariot awaits you, mi’lady.” he said when we reached his car. He went all out and did a bow before opening the door for me and escorting me into the car.

The car ride to the school was full of nothing but bickering back and forth. We kept the mood light, both of us determined to have the night of our lives. Harry especially because of what he seen last night. Heat flooded to my cheeks at the memory, but it didn’t bother me as much as it would have those many months ago. Harry has seen me at my worst and stuck around, so what was a few tears?

The hallways were crowded with a bunch of students that were swaying back and forth, or just chatting. We still had another few hallways to go down, but even from where we were, I could hear the thumping of music.

‘ We were victims of the night, the chemical, physical, kryptonite, helpless to the bass and the fading light,”

The closer we got, the louder it got, and the more nervous I got.

_ Oh god, could I do this? _

 

**Third person POV:**

 

Harry held Louis close to him as they passed the already drunk teens in the hallway. The mixture of the students obnoxious voices and the music were starting to grind on his already shot nerves, and he didn’t know how long he would be able to make it before he snapped and strangled someone.

But when he looked at Louis as they entered the gym, he  _ knew  _ he could do it. When those eyes lit up, his insides lit up in a burning fire. When that smile spread across his face, one danced on his own lips. His body reacted to Louis without him realizing it, and somehow, their hands were intertwined and they were walking onto the dance floor. 

While Harry was busy watching Louis, and Louis was busy admiring the room, neither of them noticed the people that spread apart and allowed them access to the middle of the floor. They didn't notice the shocked faces or looks of admiration that were pinned on them. They  _ didn't know  _ that they had just made  _ that _ entrance into the school dance. 

The one where everyone stood and gawks and whispers about how  _ good  _ the two look together. But even if they did, they wouldn't have cared. This was their night, and they weren't about to pay attention to anyone around them. 

At least Harry wasn't. 

Louis, however, noticed the moment he stopped looking around the room. He noticed the looks, and the whispers, and the way the floor opened up for them. It quickly turned his mood around and he was beginning to panic, until he felt that strong hand holding his. The panic melted away and Louis stood tall with his head held high, his hips swaying as they made their way to their spot. 

And when they did, Harry was met with a breathtaking smile that made the very world turn. “Everyone is staring,” Louis mumbled, though he didn't look away.

“Let them. As long as you're with me, that's all they'll be able to do,” Harry whispered. He had wanted to say some cheesy thing about how people tend to stare at the most beautiful thing in the room, but the thought alone had heat creeping up his neck.

He was getting there, to that stage, but he wasn't there yet.

The song came to an end and everyone clapped around them, startling them out of their own little world. As the claps died down, a slow song began and Harry grinned a dark, secretive smile. “Louis Tomlinson, may I have this dance?” He asked, hand grasping Louis’ as he bowed.

Louis giggled, a sound full of love and delight, and batted his eyelashes.  “If you don't mind my two left feet.”

“I got two right feet, so I bet we'll get along,”

Rolling his eyes, Louis let out a squeak of surprise when Harry yanked him forward and he was falling into a hard chest. “Geez, you can warn me next time,” Louis huffed, but rested his head on Harry's shoulders as his arms snaked around his neck.

They danced that way for a while, even when there was fast paced songs playing. Neither of them wanted to break apart, so they didn't.

The last note to Ed Sheerans ‘Thinking out loud’ song rang throughout the gym, and that was when they broke apart, smiles plastered on their faces. Harry would never admit it, but he was having fun. This was probably the most fun he has had in awhile, and judged by the looks on Louis’ face, he knew that was true for the boy too.

“I have a surprise for you,” Harry whispered when he heard the DJ say they we're going to take a five minute break so they could get the next song list setup.

“What kind of surprise?” Louis asked, feeling giddy when Harry smirked and began to walk away from him. But his face fell when he seen Harry back up to the stage, smirk still in place, and pull himself up so he was talking to the dark skinned man that was the DJ.

Louis watched as the two talked, and felt utter horror when Harry walked up to the microphone.

Oh god no.

This couldn't be happening.

“Hello, everybody!  I will be singing the next song, so grab your partners and get real close cause it’s a love one,”

Oh fuck. It was.

All color flushed from Louis’ face when the song began and it was now Harry's voice being carried throughout the school.

“ _ What day is it?  And in what month?  This clock never seemed so alive. I can't keep up, and I can't back down. I've been losing so much time _ ,”

His voice had just the right amount of rasp, and like that day in the kitchen, Louis felt as all the air left his body. Harry sounded like a  _ god. _

“ _ Cause there's you and me, and all of the people with nothing to do, nothing to lose. And there's you and me, and all of other people, and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you _ ,”

He never took his eyes off of Louis, as if to prove his point that he  _ couldn't  _ keep his eyes off of him. He smiled arrogantly, somehow knowing, without looking away from Louis once, that everyone in here stood gaping at him. Then, as if nobody else in this room mattered, Harry took the microphone off the stand and slowly began to walk down the stairs to the floor.

“ _ What are the things, that I want to say _ ?” he raised an eyebrow as he inched closer to Louis. “ _ Just aren't coming out right _ ,” a shrug of his shoulders and a toothy grin had Louis’ head spinning. “ _ I'm tripping on words, you got my head spinning, I don't know where to go from here _ ,”

Suddenly, a hand was grabbing Louis’ and he was being spun around in a full circle before he slammed into a body that started to sway as an arm locked around his waist. “ _ Cause there's you and me, and all of the people with nothing to do, nothing to prove _ ,” he had a small window to pull Louis back enough that he could stare down at him, eyes locked and hearts beating in sync. “ _ And there's you and me, and all of the people, And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you _ ,”

Harry draws Louis impossibly closer and begins to sway them in time to the beat. (So much for a slow song) “ _ Something about you now, that I can't quite figure out, everything he does is beautiful, everything he does is right _ ,” he leans down to breathe into the shell of Louis’ ear as he spins them around in unsure circles. For a moment he forgot the microphone in his hand and the people around them wanting him to finish the song, because right now, it’s so easy to forget where they are, who they are, and what they are. Right now, they’re just Louis and Harry.

“ _ Cause there's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do, nothing to lose, and there's you and me and all of the people, and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you _ .” more sweet, slow swaying as Louis’ damp palm squeezes Harry’s shoulder with more strength than he had thought he possessed.

Knowing the song is coming to an end, Harry leans down once again, his mouth hot on the curve of Louis’ ear in attempts to bring the words to live, to give them the meaning Louis needs. “ _ And me, and all other people with nothing to do, nothing to prove, and there's you and me and all other people, and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you _ .”

The boy’s gentle breaths hitch in his ear when he noses at his neck, inhaling that vanilla ocean breeze that clung to his body. “ _ What day is it, and in what month, this clock never seemed so alive _ ,” as the tune closes, Harry crushes Louis close to him until their heartbeats fuze and beat as one.

As they stand there, in the middle of the gym with clapping people surrounding them, all Harry can see when he pulls back are those ocean blue eyes staring up at him, daring him to dive in and get lost. “That was beautiful,” Louis giggled breathlessly in awe, his fingernails digging into the back of Harry’s neck as his body swayed from after effects.

“You’re beautiful,” Harry found himself saying, his foot internally kicking himself in the ass. But when he seen those eyelids cover his ocean, and the boy shrug as his head bows down even further until his forehead is pressing against Harry’s chest, he finds himself begging to get one last glimpse at those heated cheeks.

Tucking two fingers underneath his chin, Harry tips his face, gazing down at him with so much love and fondness in his eyes that he can already hear the comments he would tell to people that looked at their partners like that. “I’m serious. You are so beautiful. Sometimes when I look at you, I feel like it’ll physically hurt when I look away,”

Now his pretty mouth parts as he gasps in a small breath, and his eyes go dewy and round. “I love you,” is all Louis could say in response, a shy smile tugging at his lips.

Grinning like a mad man in love, Harry buried his face in Louis’ neck once again (his favorite place to be) and whispered the response he knew Louis would want, and knew that they both felt to be true.“I love you,” Louis heard a muffled voice say, sending his heart into full on spasms much like it did the first time he heard him say it.

Louis smiled and closed his eyes, his head resting on Harry’s shoulder. He felt like he belonged right where he was, crushed against Harry with his arms wrapped around him. And when rough lips brushed against his neck, he  _ knew  _ that this was where he belonged. He no longer had any doubts in his mind. This,  _ them,  _ was  _ right. _

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... How do you guys feel? Hate me yet? XD
> 
> The song I chose for this chapter was You and Me by Lifehouse, and let me tell you, it was a hard decision to make. I was stuck between that one, and Be your Everything by Boys like girls. I feel like a chose the right one, though. What do you guys think? (I changed the two 'shes' in the song to 'hes' for obvious reasons)
> 
> Oh, I have a question. Do you guys want to know the songs I write each chapter to? Because, quite frankly, the music I listen to plays a big part in the outcome of the chapter. If you guys do, just let me know and I'll start telling them to you guys. If not, then that's fine too. Haha.
> 
> Well, I think it's time to go now. THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR VOTING AND READING MY STORY!!! I can't stress enough how much it MEANS to me!!!!
> 
> Side note: It won't let me edit the chapter itself, because I'm on my phone, but when Harry walks up to the microphone, he takes his hat off and throws it off to the side.


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is this!?! Two updates back to back? WHAT! haha
> 
> This chapter is more of a filler, but I wanted to write a little chapter with Gemma and Louis to give a little insight on their relationship.
> 
> After this chapter, I will have one more then this book will be over! I have purposely left some problems unresolved, and I promise that in the next book it will explain why.
> 
> (keep your eyes peeled for the next chapter. It's already finished, but I have yet to decide when I want to post it)

Three week time skip: (Meaning school is out and it’s summer)

 

Louis collapsed in the seat, his entire body sighing in relieve as his muscles finally got a break. His entire body ached and his arms felt like they were going to fall off at any second, and don’t even get him started on his stomach that was practically eating itself from starvation. “How the fuck do you do this everyday?” He groaned as he rubbed the inside of his arms that were starting to form thin bruises from all the bags he had carried. “And in heels? My feet are  _ killing  _ me.”

Gemma rolled her eyes as she started the car. “You get used to it. Try coming when the stores have sales. That kills, especially when you have to run in heels to get the things you want.” Glancing over at Louis, she noticed the bruises forming on her arms and she rolled her eyes again. Ahh, she remembered her first time shopping in the mall. She wasn't able to lift her arm for three days, but it had been worth it. 

Huffing, Louis buckled his seat belt with his jelly arms and relaxed completely in the fuzzy seat. He had to admit that, despite the bruises, sore feet, aching back and empty stomach, he had fun. When you actually had money to spend while shopping, it wasn’t so bad. 

Speaking of which. “Remind me again  _ why  _ I had to get three pairs of the same shoes, only in slightly different colors?” he asked her, humming quietly at the smooth vibration from her car.

“They were completely different colors, first of all, and because everybody knows you have to have shoes to go with every outfit. Ask Harry,” she said, snorting. “On second thought, don’t ask him. He only wears black,” grimacing at her statement, she pulled out of the mall parking lot and began driving in the direction of her house. “You really need to convince him to wear some actually colors, because…”  _ and here we go again. _

Closing his eyes, Louis rested his head against the window and listened as Gemma ranted on and on about how Harry needs some color in his life and how nobody would know he’s gay unless his tongue is done another dudes throat. So, things he has already heard today.

By the time they reached the house, she had managed to get even more upset and was  _ still  _ ranting about Harry. “.. needs a haircut. His hair looks like a shaggy ass dog is living on his head, one that has been neglected for months. I’m afraid that if he walks by me, a bat will fly out of his nest and attack me. It’s just not attractive. You..”

“Need to talk to him, I know,” Louis finished for her, but he wasn’t annoyed. He was more amused than anything. On this trip, he not only got a wardrobe update, but he was gotten plenty of new visuals on Harry. 

_ He looks like one of those creepy pedos that hide in the shadows and tries to lure you out with a ride on his motorcycle. _

_ His wardrobe makes him look like an abandoned child who found tore up old clothes in the trash. _

_ When he wears black on black, he looks like one of those scary biker dudes that will eat you for dinner if you look at his daughter wrong. _

Or, Louis’ all time favorite one. 

_ God, his fucking tattoos look like a child got ahold of the tattoo gun and scribbled random ass things all over his body. I mean, who the fuck would get a giant ass moth tattooed on their stomach. Harry fucking Styles does, that’s who. He’s the man who wants to repel every single fucking person within a fifty mile radius when he takes off his shirt. I swear to god it moved once. Like actually moved, Louis. It creeps the fuck out of me. _

While it does the exact opposite for Louis. Hell, that tattoo is his favorite one Harry has.

Agreeing with him, they both climbed out of the car and walked to the trunk. After five different times of coming out, the trunk was finally empty and they were both standing in the front room, a shocked look on Louis’ face and a look of admiration on Gemma’s as they eyed all the bags. They covered the couch, coffee table, and part of the floor.

“Holy shit,” Louis breathed. He knew they had done a lot of shopping, but he didn’t know they had done  _ this  _ much. 

When Gemma dove into the pile and yelled for Louis to join her, his eyes widened and he shook his head furiously before he turned around and booked it into the kitchen. “She is not human,” Louis said once he entered the kitchen, eyes falling on Harry that was sitting at the island, eating a bowl of cereal. “Oh, thank god, I’m starving.”

“Tried to warn you,” Harry said as he went to take another bite of his food, only to have the bowl, along with the spoon, ripped out of his hands. “What was that for? Get your own!”

“Yours taste better,” 

“Does not! There’s more of that kind in the pantry!” he argued. Harry quickly realized Louis wasn’t giving him his cereal back, so he pouted like a two year old and stood up to get his own. He grumbled the entire time, too, but that didn’t faze Louis as he sat down at the island, in the seat next to Harry’s, and began to eat the lucky charms.

“You know you love me,” Louis said around a mouth full of food, his lips puckering as he blew a kiss.

Harry stared at him with disgust, but his heart had fluttered in his chest and his mind instantly answered the question.  _ Yes, yes I do love you, you Idiot.  _ But, instead of caving in and saying what his natural response was, Harry shook his head. “Do not. Especially when you talk with your mouth full.”

Grinning, Louis opened his mouth and let Harry see the contents before he asked, “Oh, you mean when I do this? Does this bother you? Aww, my poor Hazza.” Harry grimaced, Louis laughed.

“Shut up and eat your food.”

“Not until you tell me you love me,”

“Louis, you are acting like a child,” 

Sticking out his tongue, Louis stuck his nose in the air and crossed his arms over his chest. He seriously wasn’t going to eat. “Fine, asshole, I love you. Now eat your food.” 

Louis smiled and batted his eyelashes. “I knew you loved me. It’s hard not to.” This time, is was Harry that snorted.

“I beg to differ.”  _ Lies.  _ “There are plenty of things that make it hard. Like when you steal my toothbrush because it vibrates and makes your tongue feel weird, or when you steal and eat all my damn cookies, or when you bring the damn cat into bed with us because you insist she needs to feel loved too,”  _ All lies. He loves every single one of those things. _

Okay, almost. He still hates the cat. It stares at him weird and makes him feel uncomfortable.

Rolling his eyes at the obvious lies, Louis drank the milk out of his bowl and walked over to the sink to put his bowl away. “Whatever, you know you can’t get enough of me,”  _ True. _

And to prove that, Harry grabbed Louis around his waist and pinned him against the counter. Louis gasped in surprise when a Harry leaned forward to kiss him, only for him to be pulled in the opposite direction by a different person. “I don’t think so, nasty. Stick it in your pants, horndog, because I called dibs on Louis today.” Gemma said, gripping Louis’ wrist tightly. She stared at Harry with a raised eyebrow, her brown eyes daring him to fight her on this.

“You better not turn my boyfriend into some fashion crazed barbie doll like yourself,” Harry grumbled before he returned to his food.

Gemma, like always, rolled her eyes at her brothers insult and drug Louis behind her. She didn’t notice the pleading looks he gave Harry or how terrified he looked when she pushed him down on the couch. All that was on her mind was getting him into these clothes. 

So, for the next hour, Louis’ body was crammed into various types of clothes and shoes. He was on the verge of being done with life when Gemma informed him that this was the last outfit that he had to try on, and he was more than willing to do so if it meant he could get out of here.

It was a loose fitting grey sweatshirt, matched with a pair of black skinny jeans and white vans. It didn’t look too bad, but neither did the fifty other outfits. “I like it,” He stated as he looked at himself in the body sized mirror Gemma had drug from her room.

“Me too, your ass really pops in those jeans,” Harry, who had been standing in the doorway for the past half an hour just watching silently, said as he pushed himself off the frame. 

Whirling around, and knocking a shoe box off of the couch, Louis caught sight of Harry just before he disappeared up the stairs. “Weirdo. Okay, now let’s start on your hair. I think that your fringe should be swoo…” Louis stopped listening to her though, because he felt all the blood rush to his face. How long had Harry been standing there, and how much did he see?

It didn’t matter that Harry had seen him completely naked. That was completely different than the situation they were in now. “Uh-huh, listen. I’m going to go and try to talk Harry into letting us get his haircut,” Louis said absentmindedly, not even knowing what he had just told her as he made his way up the stairs.

“Finally, I never thought I’d get you to myself. I was worried there for a second that my sister had turned you straight,” Harry joked quietly as he stepped out of the shadows, nearly giving Louis a heart attack and sending him tumbling down the stairs.

“Maybe she did. Who knows?” Louis teased, though his heart wasn’t in it. Not when Harry was looking at him like that. “What?” he asked, suddenly self-conscious. He lowered his gaze to the floor, squirming as his entire body seemed to react to Harry’s steady gaze.

All of a sudden, he was being pulled up the stairs and pushed against the wall with Harry’s hips pinning him in place and rough, but gentle, fingers forcing him to look up. “Would you say that, even after I do this?” Harry asked, his voice low and threatening and Louis knew then and there that he was a goner.

His knees locked when gentle kisses were trailed down the side of his jaw, then one quick one was placed on the shell of his ear before they finally made their way to his neck. His knees were trembling by the time Harry bared his teeth and scratched them down the length of Louis’ neck. “Do you have feelings for my sister?” Harry asked, his hips starting to move in small rotations that had their groins rubbing together as his lips still worked at Louis’ neck.

“N-No,” Louis stumbled over that simple word, but who wouldn’t? He was pinned against a wall, with lips kissing along his neck while his cock was being rubbed. If he was being honest, he was doing quite well even being able to think of a word.

A breathy moan fell from Louis’ lips when Harry sucked harshly at his neck. He thought that in a matter of seconds Harry was going to drag him down the hallway and fuck him, but when the older boy pulled away and Louis cracked one of his eyes open, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath, he instantly knew that wasn’t the case.

Harry was smirking. “Glad to see I can change your mind,” Harry said, his dark eyes now shining. “Now, why don’t we go down and see what else Gemma has for you?”

“Y-You aren’t going to finish what you started?” Louis asked, his blood boiling in his veins when Harry shook his head no. “Fine, two can play at this game,” Louis growled under his breath before he spun around. He was set on getting back at Harry, and as he stomped down the stairs, the idea suddenly came to him. “No sex for a month,” he hissed over his shoulder, face bright with mischievousness.

“No! Louis! Come back. I’ll finish!” Harry said, panicking as he ran down the stairs and pulled on Louis arm frantically. “Come on, please,” he was begging now, but he didn’t give a flying fuck. No sex for a month? He would rather die.

“Nope. You dug your own grave, Styles, now sleep in it,” Louis popped his hip out and walked through the living room and disappeared into the dinning room, leaving a crushed Harry behind him.

Head sagging low, Harry followed after him, looking remarkably like a wounded dog with his tail between his legs.  “Please, Lou, I’ll do anything,” Harry whined, using the rarely used puppy dog face.

“Anything?” Louis said in a way that worried Harry, but excited him at the same time.

 

~~~

 

Anne walked into the house, sighing as she was finally able to kick her shoes off and let her aching feet breath. She just got off from working a sixteen hour shift, and she was not at all looking forward to cooking dinner. Leaning against the wall for support, she limped into the kitchen, favoring her right foot that had been trapped underneath a bed earlier.

Upon entering the dining room, this delicious aroma reached her nose and made her mouth water. It smelt like heaven.

_ Harry must be cooking. _

She pushed the door open and went to walk in, but stopped dead in her tracks when she seen Harry lift his head up, hands still working on the mashed potatoes, and smiled this warm, genuine smile at Louis’ back before he went back to mashing the potatoes. That look filled Anne’s entire body with warmth, and it took all she was not to coo and awe at him.

Instead, “Smells good boys, what’s cooking?” she asked, purposely closing the kitchen door louder than she needed to so the two boys would know she was home.

Harry had been walking to the sink to wash the potato masher off, and Louis was turning around to grab something off the counter, when they both froze in place and grinned at her. In sync, with hand gestures and all, they answered her. “Chicken, stuffed with mozzarella, wrapped in parma ham with a side of homemade mashed potatoes.”

“Louis cooked it,” Harry gushed (of course not mentioning he had been threatened with no sex unless he taught Louis how to cook the meal) before he rushed over to his mom and showed her the picture he had snuck of Louis standing at the stove. Louis had changed out of his brand new outfit and put on a pair of Harry’s red sweat pants and a striped red shirt.

He looked so focused and happy in the picture, and Anne’s heart melted when Harry looked at the picture with fond eyes. “He has only burned himself once so far, and nothing has caught on fire yet. He’s learning quick,” Harry sighed, eyes round and full of love, until a hot pad was being thrown at his head.

“You were the one who made me burn myself!” Louis shouted across the room, his eyes focused on Harry and his right hip popped out.

_ This boy and his sass.  _

“Did not! You burned yourself when you tried to grab the hot pan handle,” Harry shot back, his phone sliding onto the counter and the picture forgotten.

“No, you smacked my butt and made….” Louis seemed to realize what he was saying because he clamped his mouth shut and looked at Anne, his face draining of color. “I mean, n-no. I grabbed the hot handle.”

Harry opened his mouth to argue, but a glare was thrown in his direction from Louis and they quickly went back to busying themselves. Anne just sighed happily and set in the stool at the island, enjoying being able to watch someone cook instead of being the one that was cooking. It was a nice change.

It didn’t hurt that from where she was sitting, she could see all the looks the two of them were sharing.

_ Ah, young love. _

  
  
  
  



	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I am posting this chapter with a heavy heart! This is it! We've reached the end. DX I have enjoyed getting on every day and reading the new comments on this story, and I honestly can't believe how many of you actually enjoyed it. When I started this story, I didn't expect anyone to read it. So imagine how shocked I am today, to see all of you that have read ISWAW. Ugh. Guess I should get on with it, yeah? Well, this may be the last chapter for this story, but I will be posting the sequel in a week or so. I will make add another chapter with an authors note letting you know what the next book will be names.
> 
> I do have a few questions for the next book. First: How do you feel about Mpreg? Second: Would you guys prefer if the book takes place during their senior year, or have it set further in the future? I would love to hear your thoughts. Oh, and if any of you would like, you could leave title suggestions in the comments. I already have a few ideas in my head, but new ideas never hurt anyone.
> 
> Alright.... I'll let you get to it...
> 
> Excuse me while I cry.

Lottie set across from her brother, eyes shining with love as she stared at him and Harry, who were staring at each other. A protective arm was wrapped around the youngest boys thin shoulders, and fingers were closed in a tight grip. The moment she had seen her brother and his boyfriend walk into the restaurant, she could tell they were completely and happily in love with each other. 

“I’m glad he found someone like you, Harry. He needed a good change in his life.” Gemma said, folding her arms and leaning back into her own pair of arms that wrapped protectively around her. A nose was instantly nuzzling against her neck, making her crunch her neck and giggle softly.

“You too. Zayn’s been good for you,” Louis told his sister, finally managing to tear his eyes off of Harry long enough to give Lottie a knowing look before he flickered his eyes to the head that was now laying on her shoulder.

She blushed lightly and turned her head to come face to face with Zayn, their noses brushing. “He has, hasn’t he?” she asked, laughing when she felt a hand sneak between her legs and squeeze her thigh softly.

“I think you have that the wrong way,” Harry said, earning him a confirming nod from Zayn. “You have been good for me, and Lottie for Zayn,” 

“Nope. You guys have been good for us. There’s no arguing about this.” Louis said, his arms crossing over his chest as he stared at Harry in a matter-of-fact way.

Harry seen that tongue poke the inside of Louis’ cheeks, and his hands were immediately flying up in surrender. “Fine, you win. I take it back,”

Huffing, Louis leaned back and uncrossed his arms. He smiled at Lottie and winked at her. He knew that he has had a positive impact on Harry, and that Lottie has with Zayn, but this was his and Lottie’s day. It was them against the world, or in this case, it was them against their boyfriends. 

The two siblings were free of the burden their mother has placed on them for nearly their entire lifes. They no longer had to fake smiles or worry about how long their genuine happiness would last. They knew that where they were right now, was where they belonged and that it would last.

The fear of their mother never waking up after a night of partying, no longer weighed heavily on their minds anymore. They could have lives now, lives that didn't revolve around taking care of their mom. Ironically,  the day their mom abandoned their lives, was the same day they actually began  _ living. _

Time skip: Christmas eve.

Harry set on the couch, Louis sitting between his legs on the floor. A large box, wrapped in pretty blue wrapping paper, set between Louis’ legs. It was three o’clock in the morning, and after the two of them had birthday sex, per Louis’ request, they made their way downstairs so Harry could give Louis his birthday present…. And christmas present. It was all wrapped into one. What could he say? He sucked at gift giving.

He watched, all to excitedly, as Louis tore open the box and was greeted with another box, which then had another box. This went on for three more boxes, all growing smaller and smaller, until he reached the last box that had a piece of paper inside it. 

_ You think i’d let you off that easy? Try again. To find your real gift, I have set up a little game for you to play. All the places I use, are places that mean something to us and our relationship. Now, play along, and follow these simple rules and you will find your gift in a place you least expect it. _

Then below that;

_ I am hidden somewhere dark. You hang clothes in me, and sometimes eat stolen cookies in me, what am I? Figure it out, and there will wait the next clue. _

“This is going to be so much fun!” Louis squealed, and before Harry could give him a hint, Louis was already running up the stairs and into their bedroom.

Harry waited where he was, knowing Louis would be back downstairs in a matter of minutes.

And he was.

“ _ I am played on everyday, sometimes by completely different people. This is where Harry first realized he had feelings for you. Figure it out, and there will lay the third clue, hidden beneath the thing you sit on,”  _ Louis read aloud, his lips pursing as he thought. “Oh!” he exclaimed, giving Harry no chance to say anything before he was bolting out the door and to the car.

“What are you waiting for? Grab your keys and come on!” Louis shouted before he slammed the car door shut. Harry just grinned and shook his head, following after him after he grabbed both of their jackets and Louis’ shoes.

The clue led them to the park, then the one after that led them to the cafe, where Harry had heard the first sinful noise Louis could make. Then it was the school parking lot, then it was Louis’ house, where they had their first kiss, and there were three more stops after that, all being a key to their relationship.

And now they stood in Harry’s back yard, Louis running towards the woods while Harry trailed behind him, the box in his pants being a heavy reminder that this was it. This was the final clue before Louis got his present.

His heart was heavy as he walked through the woods and found Louis standing in  _ their _ meadow, his eyes searching the tall grass as he blindly reached in front of him. “Try by the pond,” Harry suggested, moving quickly after him so he could get in place.

Louis did as Harry said, and after a few seconds, he found the pink envelope. Slipping his tongue between his teeth, he ripped it open, his patients being gone, and unfolded the piece of paper. 

_ If you have found me, that means you have finished the game.  _ Was written at the top.

_ Through this, you have got to see all the different places that mean something to Harry, things that you probably didn’t know. And if you have made it this far without killing him, then that proves that you love him.  _

Louis read through the rest of it carefully, his head swimming as he seen everything through Harry’s point of view. He was nearly done with it now, and little did he know, Harry was in position behind him, his palms sweaty as they held the velvety box between them. By the time he reached the bottom of the page and read the last two words written in bold letters, his heart was mush in his chest.

**_TURN AROUND_ **

He did.

“Louis William Tomlinson.” Harry said as he finished getting down on one knee, the snow crunching beneath his weight. Louis’ own name had his heart hammering in his chest. His eyes were popping out of his skull because this was really happening. “I met you a little over a year now, and forgive me for not knowing the exact date. My memory is shitty,” Harry chuckled, trying to ease his nerves. “Then, I didn’t know that the boy who hid inside his hoodie and stuttered over nearly every word, would be the same man I am kneeling in front of today. I didn’t know that by simply talking to him, I would find myself captivated by his very existence. I didn’t know I would want to figure out every single little detail about him, or that I’d enjoy doing it. I didn’t know that he would impact my life the way he did.

I didn’t know that I would fall in love with him as hard and as fast as I did. I love you, Louis, and I want you to know that I will continue loving you until my last breath. I know that I don’t have much to offer, well things that can’t be bought with money, but I promise you I will give you everything I have. I will give you everything I am, and more, if you promise me that you will stay by my side forever,” pausing, Harry opened the lid on the small box and revealed the small ring that shimmered in the sun that was just starting to rise.

“With this ring, I promise that I will continue being the very best that I can be. I promise you that you will never be alone, and that you will never feel alone. I promise you that there will always be cookies hidden under my bed. I promise that I will continue to love you as strongly, and as fiercely as I do today. This ring will signify that one day, I will be your husband, your best friend, your other half, the father to your children. With this ring, I promise you that you will never walk this earth again, feeling unloved or unwanted. Because I want you, Louis, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I know that we’re still young, but I have never been more surer of something, than I am now. I love  _ you, _ and I hope you will accept everything I am giving you.”  _ There, he said it. He laid everything out there. He was making himself vulnerable. _

To add to all of this, Harry felt as something wet began to trail down his cheek, and he felt as this ball began to form in his throat, making it hard to swallow. It didn’t take him long to realize that he was crying, and when he met Louis’ gaze, he was pulled into the crystal clear waves that crashed against the shore. The swirling blue eyes that were full of passion and unclear emotions generated the feeling of being comfortable, warm, familiar,  _ safe. _ He didn’t hesitate to dive right in, the peak of awe written all over his face as his body was flooded with the overwhelming feeling of being  _ home. _

“I love you, Harry Styles, and I promise you that one day I will take you to your promise and make you my husband,” Louis said, full blown sobbing now. He didn’t miss the look on Harry’s face, the way it lit up with pure joy. “Now, get off your knees and kiss me, you fool,” Louis sniffled and laughed as Harry scrambled to his feet and wrapped Louis in a hug. He spun them not once, not twice, but three times around before he planted Louis on the ground and crushed his lips with his own.

The kiss was quick, but the love the two of them had poured into it left them breathless. They were both panting, fog forming around them from the cold, crisp air, when Harry took the ring out of the box, being so careful, before he slipped the band onto Louis’ slim finger and stared at the diamond that caught the sun and glimmered so beautifully on top of his finger. It was a simple silver band that had three small diamonds on either side of the larger one, but the way it sat on his finger, it looked so perfect, so extravagant. It looked like it was finally where it belonged.

Even if it was just a promise ring.

~~~~

Anne heard the back door slide open and when she turned around, she seen Louis walk in first, hair disheveled and a patch of dried mud smudged across his right cheek, then Harry followed close behind him, mud and pieces of snow clinging to strands of his hair.

It didn’t take much to figure out what they were doing out there.

Rolling her eyes, Anne began to turn around, but something caught her eye. It was a little flash of light, and when she looked in that area closely, she nearly fainted. “OH MY GOD HARRY EDWARD STYLES WHY DIDN’T YOU WARN ME!” She shouted, throwing the soapy sponge she had been using, at Harry before she ran right over to them and pulled into a hug, tears already streaming down her face.

“Calm-- mum you’re squishing me- down, I wanted it to -seriously, I can’t breath- be a surprise. Oh, for the love of god, let me breath,” Harry cried out, prying his mums off of him so he could step back and allow his crushed airway a chance to work.

He felt bad for Louis, he really did, but he was leaving him to fend for himself. 

“I nearly had a heart attack! Is that what you would have wanted, Harry? Did you want your mother to die in clothes like these, with soap and water covering her?”  _ Maybe she was over exaggerating, but Harry didn’t need to know that. _

 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I didn’t know a promise ring would be such a big deal to you,” Harry murmured as he popped a grape in his mouth and leaned against the counter with his hip.

“Of course it’s a big deal! Aw….” Harry stopped listening then. He has already used his quota on emotions for today.

Grabbing the bowl of grapes, he went into the front room and plopped down on the couch. The t.v was on, and his eyes were focused on it, but it was background noise. His ears were focused on the words being said in the kitchen, but he didn’t really listen closely to what they were saying.

“You picked a good one, brother,” Gemma said as she plopped down on the cushion next to Harry, her fist grazing his arm as she punched him playfully. 

“I already know this,” he said, rolling his eyes. He would never tell Gemma this, but her approval of Louis meant a lot to him.

They sat in silence for a few seconds. “I’m proud of you,” she whispered sincerely. “If someone, a year ago, would have told me that I would be sitting next to you, saying this or congratulating you on giving your boyfriend a promise ring, I would punch them in the face and laugh at how horrible their lie was,” she said, lips opening again like she wanted to say something, but she paused for a second and turned to face Harry. “You’ve always been smart, and I’m glad that you finally have your head pulled out of your ass,”

“You didn’t congratulate me,” Harry said, confused. That, next to the swelling of pride in his chest from the feeling of actually doing  _ something _ right for once in his life, was the only thing he caught from that conversation.

Snorting, Gemma took a grape out of the bowl and stood up. “I just did,” she said, winking at him before she disappeared up the stairs.

Harry was left confused for a second, and not for the first time that day, but then a figure was jumping over the couch and landing in his lap before erupting in a chorus of giggles. He didn’t remember why he was confused, because a pair of lips were pressing soft kisses along his jaw and he forgot everything in this world  _ except  _ for Louis.

\--------

Anne rinsed off the last dish before she put it into the dish drainer and made her way into the living room. She wiped her hands on the back of her jeans and leaned against the door, eyes focused on her two boys on the couch. Her heart was full of love when she noticed Harry glance at Louis every few seconds with that reserved smile of his, but it was always when he thought nobody would notice. 

  
And like that day in the kitchen when he taught Louis how to cook, the day Anne wasn't even supposed to be home, she noticed.    
  
She  _ always _ noticed.    
  
With one last glance at the two, she slowly backed out of the room and left them alone, the fear she once felt when she left Harry alone in a room, now gone. She knew, in the deepest part of her heart, that Louis would take care of her boy.    
  
Scratch that.    
  
_ Their boy. _


	37. Author's note ~And chapter 1~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! How are all of you today???? I wanted to make an authors note and let you all know that I have posted the second book!! It's on this account, and it's "Whisper that you love me". This book will be focused around their senior year of high school and possibly their first year of college, and there will be a third book. I already have the title picked out and a general idea of what I want to happen, so look out for that one as soon as this one is finished. I haven't decided how long I want this book to be, but I have a feeling it will be quite a few chapters. I am excited to continue their story and see where it takes us!!! Thank you all, again, for reading ISWAW! I didn't think I would even finish it when I began, let alone make it a series. I can never stress just how much your support mean to me! Anyway, I'll end that here and I hope you all enjoy the new story!!
> 
>  
> 
> Much love, Xx
> 
> || I didn't know if I could post a chapter without actually having anything to write about, so I'm going to go ahead and post the first chapter to the second book! ||

My teeth were gritted together as I stood outside, trying to get some peace and quiet, but like always, that was never going to happen. My jaw was throbbing painfully when I began to grind my teeth, my head turning to the right so I could watch the thing that bugged the living shit out of me, come running around the corner, followed by its owner. Her black body stood out in the snow, making it easy to spot her.

The cat, Zoey, came and rested by my feet, and I couldn't stop myself from growling, hoping she got the picture and fucked off. Turns out, she didn't care. She maneuvered her way between my legs and began to purr, her head rubbing against the top of my shoe. "Growl again, I think it's sexy," Louis said, coming to a halt in front of me and placing his small hand on my chest.

I wanted to grab his wrist and throw it off of my body, to show him that I wasn't in the mood to play, but his damn eyes grew soft as he stared up at me from underneath his thick eyelashes. "Will you get this damn thing away from me?" I asked instead, my foot nudging at the cat's side.

I had silently hoped it would tip her over, but it didn't. It just messed up her balance, and she swayed for a second, but she caught herself and glared up at me. "Oh, come on, Hazza, she likes you. Just give her a chance,"

"She just glared at me, Louis. The cat glared at me, and you want me to give her a chance?" This was no amusin the the slightest, but Louis seemed like it was because he laughed and picked the cat up, his fingers brushing the fur on her back.

"It's a cat, not a human, she can't glare," he said, shoving the black ball of fur at me. For a split second, I was tempted to leave my arms at my sides and let it fall, but then I knew what that would do to Louis, so I quickly caught her in my arms and stared down at her.

She was an odd looking thing. Her head was far too large for her body, and since she's been here, her stomach has grown too, but not her body. Nope. She had a large head and a protruding stomach, with tiny legs and everything. "It's ugly,"

At that, a hand was swatting my arm and Louis was ripping the cat out of my arms. _Thank fucking god._ "She is not!" he gasped, shocked, even though I have told him she was ugly since the first day he got her those many, many months ago.

I rolled my eyes and leaned back against the house, propping my leg behind me. "Whatever you say, love."

"I do say so! She is adorable and fuck you if you say otherwise! You need glasses," he shouted, making me grin. He was adorable when he was aggressive.

"Fine, fine, she's cute," pausing, I threaded my fingers through my hair and whistled quietly under my breath, my eyes falling on the rising sun. "How about you and the adorable little thing go and play in the woods, yeah?"

Louis rolled his eyes, but spun around and began to skip towards the woods, leaving his shoe prints behind in the powder white snow. My eyes followed after him, and it wasn't until he disappeared into the thick trees that I finally let my eyes drift around me. Snow covered the ground like a thick white blanket. The tree branches hung low from the weight, a few looking as if they were about to snap.

I shook my head and let my head rest against the cool brick, my head tipping back and up towards the sun. I wanted to relax, to let myself soak in the sun without getting absurdly cold. I was wearing one of my old hoodies, because Louis begged me to let him wear my jean jacket, and I couldn't bring myself to say no. Even with the thick material, I could feel the cool air, and I imagined my nose was bright red, because I lost feeling to it a few minutes ago.

Sighing, I let my mind drift off. I haven't had any time alone since I gave Louis the damn promise ring. When it was him I was with, I didn't mind, but I hated the fact that my mum has been breathing down my neck since last week. She's watching my every move, either waiting for me to drop down on one knee and propose to Louis, or break up with him and break his heart.

The first seemed more realistic than the second, but don't ask me why. I can't figure out why I love the annoying little shit so much. It doesn't matter if he is jabbering on and on about something I couldn't give two shits about, or simply sitting in my lap with his fingers raking through my hair as he tries to coax a story out of me.

And, without fail, I always tell him one. They range from princes' getting married, to some silly made up shit about a boy stumbling to the woods and finding a man there that he falls in love with, that he later discovers is time himself. He makes me tell him the latter one more than any other story, and I think it's because of the fact that time freezes the moment he meets the young man, and stays there for years, mesmerizing each detail on the young boy's face and of the space around them before he starts time again and disappears, leaving the boy questioning everything that happened.

He then, later, visits that same place again and finds the young man is still sitting there, waiting for him. Despite everything that has ever been said, Time does wait for one man, and that man later becomes his husband. It's cheesy, and I would deny ever telling that story, but Louis loves it, so I tell him it.

Louis Tomlinson is the boy I wanted to fuck last year, but want to make my husband this year. Quite a change he's made to me in such a short time, yeah? Yeah.

I cracked my eyes open and watched the last few seconds of the sun rise. It was a beautiful thing to see as the sun finally came to rest above the tall trees in my backyard. The snow seemed to react to the sun, and it began to shimmer brightly, reflecting the light and sending it in multiple different directions.

Ah, yet another thing that he has changed about me. I have found myself wanting to view the things around me more, and actually sit back and admire them, rather than just glance at it and piss off somewhere else. Smiling, I pushed myself up off the wall and glanced at the woods, debating on whether or not I wanted to follow after him.

I had decided not to. He needed time alone, and I was going to give him that. Then I heard this noise, and goosebumps covered my skin when a high, loud pitched scream followed it. I listened for a second to see if anything followed. Nothing did. Fear kicked in and I didn't think twice before I was running towards the woods, my feet working faster than my brain. I followed Louis' footprints and found him in our meadow, his eyes wide with tears as he reached over the edge of the pond, his sobs being heard from where I was standing.

"Louis, baby, what's wrong?" I asked, panting as I walked up behind him, my eyes widening when I seen what had him so worked up. There was a Rabbit floating in the water, it's frozen body continuously hitting into the ice that surrounded it.

"We have to save it, Harry, we can't leave it," he sobbed, turning to face me with red, puffy eyes.

"It's dead," I whispered, my heart constricting when he sobbed even louder and leaned forward, stick now in hand, and began to break the ice so the rabbit could float closer to him. I didn't have the heart the pull him away and tell him he was beyond help (I've turned mushy, I know, but fuck off) so I grabbed a large stick instead and dropped down onto my knees, next to him, and began to help him break the ice.

I eyed the small creature, and even from here, you could see it was obviously dead. A white layer covered his eyes, and his body was frozen stiff, meaning he has been out here for quite some time. Regardless, I helped him break the ice and when the thing got close enough to us, I used two sticks and fished him out of the water.

All hope left Louis' eyes when I laid him on the ground and his body stayed the exact same way. There wasn't any indication of life; not one tiny twitch of the ear, or a barely visible movement of the paw. He was dead, and Louis knew that now.

Without saying anything to me, he bent down and grabbed Zoey from her place on the rock, and began to walk away. "Stay," he told me without looking back at me before he disappeared out of sight.

_What the fuck? I was supposed to stay?_

Ha, like that'll happen.

I went to walk forward, but I hesitated before I sighed deeply and moved back to where I was before. Louis better fucking come back, or I was going to spank him for leaving me out here for no reason.

Oh, spanking.

At the sudden change of topic, my mind wandered to Louis bent over my knees, a pair of pretty blue panties on his bum. His ass was a pretty shade of pink, and when I placed my hand on it, it was warm.

My dick began to stir in my pants, and I quickly diminished those thoughts because I could feel the rabbits dead eyes staring at me, judging me. I cleared my throat and shifted on my feet, my hands clasping in front of my body as I rocked back and forth on my feet. How fucking long was I supposed to wait here until Louis got back? Was I supposed to wait until my balls froze off, or just until I could no longer feel any parts on my body?

"I grabbed you gloves so you could pick it up," Louis said, suddenly appearing behind me. I jumped back, nearly tripping over the rabbit and falling ass first into the water, and looked down at him.

He had a pair of thick gloves, a shovel, a piece of wood, and a sharpie. I had no idea where he got the wood, but I didn't have any time to ask before everything, aside from the shovel, were being thrown in my arms and he was walking towards a tree in the far side, where there was little to no snow under it, and began to dig.

Well, he tried to dig.

The ground was frozen solid, so all he managed to do was make a little nic in the dirt. "Give me the shovel," I said, rolling my eyes as I reached out for it.

He turned his head and looked questioningly at me, and I nodded in response. He grinned and handed it to me, then took the stuff out of my arms and stepped aside, allowing me access to dig. "You need to wear this," I growled at him, taking off my hoodie before he could fight. His nose was bright red, his cheeks were even redder, and he was sniffling. If he didn't get warm soon, I would be taking care of a sick Louis tomorrow.

He, surprisingly, didn't fight me on it. He set the stuff on the rock, pulled off the jean jacket, put the hoodie on, then put back on the jean jacket. I smiled in satisfaction, and began to dig.

It was a lot fucking harder than it looked. It was nearly impossibly to get the shovel through the frozen dirt, but when I did, everything went fine from there. I could see Louis watching me out of the corner of my eyes, his bottom lip clamped between his teeth. "Like what you see?" I teased, my voice breathless.

"More than anything," he whispered in response, his eyes growing a shade darker. I chuckled and shook my head, focusing back on the task at hand before I say 'fuck it' and screw him out here, yet again.

A few minutes later I finished digging a hole that seemed deep enough, and I waited for Louis to grab to rabbit. I shoved the shovel into the ground and leaned against it, my arm propped up on the cool, metal handle. My skin was bright red by now from the chilly weather, but I didn't care about me getting sick. I could handle myself. Louis, on the other hand, was a whole other story when he was sick.

"Got him," Louis half screamed half shrieked as he turned around, the rabbit dangling in front of him. He had ahold of his ear, that's it, nothing else.

"Hurry up, pansy," I said fondly, rolling my eyes. Louis ran over to me and threw the rabbit into the hole, his nose scrunching up in disgust as he threw the gloves in random directions.

I laughed at him, but didn't say anything because I wanted to go home already, so I buried the rabbit while Louis wrote "Rest in peace, Judy" on the piece of wood. When I was finished, I shoved the piece of wood into the ground, above it's head, and stepped back to admire my work.

"You did good," Louis whispered to me, his warm hand sneaking out and grabbing ahold of my ice cold one.

"You are way too good for this world, Louis Tomlinson," I said, and not for the first time. I was awed by him and his heart more days then I wasn't. He was far too kind and good for this world, and I honestly don't think that anyone should ever have the chance to tell him that he is anything but a wonderful human being.

Because he is so much more. To me, and even to this frozen rabbit we just buried.

****

Time skip: Next day

"Are you ready for this?" I asked Louis, my hand grabbing the door handle, but I didn't pull it open just yet. Today was our first day back to school after christmas break, and Louis decided he was going to 'toughen' up and go to school without his hoodie. Me, being the 'amazing' boyfriend I am, encouraged him and told him to do it.

"What about the ring?" he asked, his hand flying over to his other hand so he could play with the band.

"What about it? If anyone gives you shit at all today, I promise you I will kick their arse," I promised him, taking his hand in mine. I hated how his eyes filled with fear and how he cowered back at my touch. I hated all the people in this fucking school for making him doubt himself, but most of all, I fucking hate his mum and Seth for making him flinch every time I tried to hold his head when I didn't let him know beforehand.

He smiled shyly up at me, rewarding me with a dazzling smile that made my heart throb in my chest. "My hero," he whispered, batting his eyelashes and placing his hand lightly on his head, like he was about to faint.

I snorted and rolled my eyes, my worry for him already disappearing. He seemed to be able to calm me, even when I was on the verge of killing someone. He never seemed to fail.

"Fuck that, I'm not a hero," I said, and I wasn't. In no way shape or form have I saved Louis, or made this world a better place. I was just me, Harry Styles, boy with a bad temper and very active labido.

"You're my hero," he said sincerely, the corner of his eyes crinkling as he smiled. I noticed how he instinctively leaned closer to me when I smiled back, and my heart began to race.

I pulled him to my chest, placed a quick kiss on his forehead-- to reassure him and let him know that I was always here for him, and turned us so we were facing the door. "Let's go," I said, pride blooming in my chest when he leaned forward and tugged to door open for the both of us.

He stayed close to me as we walked down the hallway, and the moment we reached a hallway with a lot of activity, I began to feel my body tense. People snickered around us, and a few murmured about Louis' outfit, his ring, or both of us. My eyes darted around to see a few older and younger students looking at us in disgust.

I didn't care what they thought, I really fucking didn't, but the boy that I cared about did, and I wasn't about to sit back and let any of this slide. "What the fuck are you staring at? We're two males that are dating, get the fuck over it," I fumed, my arm tightening around Louis.

"It's wrong," someone yelled.

"Don't fucking flaunt it around school," someone else yelled.

"It's fucking disgusting how you think it's okay to be with another guy," another person yelled, and I snapped.

"It's fucking pathetic how you guys have so much to say about my life, yet your own life is fucking shit. How many of you can say that you aren't drunk? Or that you didn't go out and get wasted this entire winter break?" I asked, watching as everyone fell silent and nobody raised their hand. "Exactly. So fuck off and get your life together before you start judging mine. Get on the fucking web, you small-minded bigots, it's the twenty first century," I growled, every single muscle in my body tight and my breathing shallow.

I wanted to hit something, or somebody, and make everyone understand that my life is none of their fucking business. What goes on between me and Louis, is our business, we get to decide what is right and wrong and I know for a god damn fact that loving him isn't _wrong._

"So, the fag gets all angry and tries to scare us," Gage, the school's biggest douche, says as he steps out from the crowed. "Face it, Styles, you're nothing but a fucking queer who takes it up the ass every night,"

I was stepping away from Louis, my vision going in and out as my anger grew until I felt like I was going to burst, when Louis gripped my arm tightly and drug me backwards. "Gage, honey, I wouldn't make it a habit in making fun of gay people, considering you and Tristan have been fucking for a few months now," Louis spoke up, making me and everyone else freeze and look at him. "And don't even try and deny it, Gage. You forget, I'm a T.A seventh period. I hear everything that goes on in the bathrooms," he grinned widely at him and I my eyes widened.

Where the fuck did that come from?

I heard a few people snicker and call Gage a condescending prick, and some very colorful names, before he turned around and ran down the hallway. "What was that?" I asked Louis, pulling him into a tight hug and kissing the side of his head. "You're a fucking genius!" I have never felt more delight from something Louis has said, than I have now.

He giggled against my chest and pulled back, his right eyebrow inclined. "You needed help, so I helped you," he said with a shrug of his shoulders, acting as if what he said wasn't probably going to get his ass kicked later. I'd never let it happen, of course.

"Is it true? Are they fucking?"

"Mhhm. Gage likes to be called a bad girl," Louis said, shuddering as his mind seemed to play some memories.

I grinned widely and grabbed his hand. We began to walk down the hallway once again, everyone now fucking off and paying no attention to us. "I'm going to call him that everytime I see him," I said, my eyes lighting up at just the thought. God, this was going to be so much fucking fun. I was going to make his life _hell._

Louis opened his mouth to respond, but then his head seemed to turn in another direction. My ears perked when I heard his name, and like him, I began to listen. "Did you hear about Louis Tomlinson? He told everyone Gage is sleeping with Tristan," there was a small pause, "Yeah! The nerd that used to keep quiet! He called Gage out! Dude, you should have been there, it was awesome. Gage looked like he was about to piss his pants and cry at the same time!"

"Well, Louis Tomlinson," I began, my hand curling around his hip, "Looks like you aren't the quiet little book boy anymore," I finished, the same feeling of pride returning.

Turns out that maybe, just maybe, I have helped Louis. I helped him come out of his shell, and now.... He is the somebody to these idiots that he should have been all along.


End file.
